


Lizbob Supernatural Watching Notes (season 14)

by lizbobjones



Series: Lizbob Supernatural Watching Notes [14]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Archived From Tumblr, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Fanwork Research & Reference Guides, Meta, Meta Essay, Non Fiction, archived from elizabethrobertajones blog, watching notes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2019-05-30
Packaged: 2019-09-12 03:30:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 132,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16865311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizbobjones/pseuds/lizbobjones
Summary: ow.





	1. 14x01

RIP Kip, we hardly knew ye.

Well hey, returning friends and people who unwittingly clicked on this not knowing exactly what they’re in for. Blowing off the dust and starting a new season of Dabb fuckery, which I spent way too long trying to think of a portmanteau for when I already have the episode downloaded

It’s 5am, let’s DO THIS.

-

So they start with Dean’s Hi I Am A Cop On The Day Before I Retire speech re: hula girls and hawaiian t-shirts which is remarkably prescient of me to have been irrationally upset about that one detail after I binged most of season 13 last night to get me back in the mood. So now I have to elaborate on my one line textpost >.>

Because yes, that is the perfect note to start the season on: Dean thought the good times had rolled, allowed himself to hope, assembled himself a family with mom and step-pop (Bobby counts as a full father but AU Bobby is step-pop), brother, husband, kid… Said kid was promising A World Without Monsters aka Dabb’s showrunning tagline for an endgame he teases them. And Lucifer was tucked safely away in an AU with the murderous Michael… And then in a series of events it all came crumbling down and with this amount of goodness in his grasp, he gave up what even when the real Michael was hounding him for it, he couldn’t before.

Because in season 13 it is beyond obvious that Dean is tired, an Old Hunter, the best of his game but ready to bow out on that note, and yet for him it’s not a matter of stepping back and letting someone else handle it because when Michael and Lucifer were involved, it was beyond personal. He and Sam only EXIST because Lucifer and realMichael wanted them to. And so there was no way this trouble would come to someone else’s door, when it was the nasty angel on his shoulder and the devil on Sam’s and we have Nougat as their collective responsibility who’s the nexus of it all anyway.

-

Eeee the Road So Far text is glowy grace colour on a dark blue background. I’m JIZED for the title card.

-

Goodness, the Road So Far is a weird journey because we see Jack being all useful and magic and then callbacks to 13x01 and 2 where he was a messed up 2 day old and Dean just wanted to murder him.

I haven’t outlined any expectations for this episode or even this recap but I suddenly realise that I should probably be wondering how much DeanCas we’re gonna get in it, and this rage against Jack is subtextually motivated, for sure, but for me the first 6 episodes of Dean’s grief arc were wonderful character stuff but removed from the main plot and therefore in my head I keep boxing them off like a bubble season, like 10x01-3 are, and I legit wasn’t even expecting to SEE content from them in the recap, because brilliant as they are I sort of just forgot they were a part of this season despite watching them yesterday. The season for me became so much the Jack And Mary Search that this hiccup at the start didn’t meet the requirements to be in season 13 :P

They’re just That Time Dean Was Really Sad About Cas Then He Came Back And They Were Cowboys

-

Oh good there was “everybody we’ve lost” and then a recap of Cas dying and then - oh, we’re recapping plot again? Er… everybody? Dean? Who else? DEAN?

this was the thinly veiled subtext of that line anyway since Dean waved off Mary and made it all about Cas anyways but. Yikes, editing team.

-

Jesus I watched season 13 yesterday and I forgot about Asmodeus. You know what, this is pre-coffee AND the 2 types of anti-brain fog medication I gobble in the morning.

But he’s that much of a useless lump

Also too much Lucifer nipple on screen pre-coffee. Ick.

-

Nice recapping of Not The Levitating Fight.

-

NOW

Stock photo Nyoom of the season!! Hi Baby! You aren’t in this episode because Eugenie said the car wasn’t being used this season

-

Sam’s got his Vengeance Eyes on but he’s all scruffy and grown up so I trust him 10000% to get the job done.

-

OW. FUCK. OW. OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. GOOD USE OF INTERSTITIAL MUSIC

Why were you even listening to Dean’s tapes if they fuck you up that badly? IS THIS YOUR VENGEANCE PLAYLIST? I’VE BEEN WAITING 10 YEARS

Actually, I haven’t, I binged 4-5-6 as one unit after thinking the show was cancelled during the writers’ strike but the point is that Sam and his ipod in 4x01 is immediately in my head because he was listening to his own music and being a hipster douche, but now he is not on demon blood he has not installed an ipod dock because he’s GETTING DEAN BACK, DAMMIT but at the same time he’s also realising that this means a heavy toll that the only driving music in the car is Dean’s stuff…

-

Oh no, this must be the guy from the SDCC clip we hadn’t seen because Osric Chau is banned forever for illegally uploading them all for us in the past, and all I know is that Deanchael is going to Fuck Him Up and I feel very bad for him

*raises my mug to Osric* I’m sure you tried, dude. And thanks for the previous years.

-

Hi Deanchael. I noticed in a promo pic that his tie has that sacred geometry type pattern on it which is a detail I made a mental note to type out literally anywhere in the like month between there and here and did not so here it is at a hopefully appropriate place.

Based on every other scene setting detail I suspect that this faithful man is actually still within the USA because this is literally the cabin set they re-use for everything. The spoilers made it sound like Deanchael was globe trotting to raise his army but now I see what’s around us… Yeah no he’s as focused on the US as every other big bad before.

-

Anyway they really specifically chose this prayer to Allah because of how pointed it was about being only for Allah and how he was the best, so I’m assuming Deanchael is here to be like yo God’s gone and I’m your last chance of faith

-

Like just ruin his day and he got up at like 4am or whatever the first prayer is to do it and all

-

I hope, like, no offence to any Muslim viewers or anything >.> They sure play fast and loose with a lot of this stuff because Christian cultures are full of bitter non-believers raised in the culture and looking to kick up at the big guy in the sky, which is not an impression I get that Islam is as used to cultural flippancy, regardless of personal beliefs of residents of predominately Muslim countries and cultures. I’m not 100% sure though, because the closest link I’ve got is my raised-Christian Iranian friend who applies Christian eye-rolling to the issues with being in Iran and heathen so I still get that perspective of middle fingers up at Organised Religion from our discussions about it all… anyway big diversion, still waiting for coffee to kick in :P I just swallowed the last of it so I can only get more jittery from here on out!

-

It’s so fuckin weird to see Dean’s face confidently reciting verse in Arabic

I mean you don’t need the hat, sir. I get it. It’s not you in there.

-

Well so far anyway he’s playing on the fact that the guy does pray to god and his angels.

-

Lol @ this man guessing his way through God AND Gabe to Deanchael’s annoyance that he’s the 3rd guess and he has to clarify that he’s the better one.

Man, Gabriel worked on his reputation. I wouldn’t have been able to tell you who Michael was because there wasn’t even a kid in my class with that name when I was age 4 busy portraying Gabriel in a nativity play with full impish glee that the real deal would have been proud of.

-

Uhoh things aren’t looking good for Jamil D: Asking for peace and love is good, you funky little hippy.

Is Deanchael implying that the Syria insurgency is the route to peace? I honestly don’t know enough about the American foreign policy politics to know what sort of stance this is though from a liberal leaning show (I mean come on Bobo is a card-carrying socialist, I’ve seen it on Twitter :P), though to an outside viewer well aware of how fucked up it all is should this have been said on a British program, this is a vast over-simplification.

But we know Michael’s main traits are Likes War and then also Warmonger and of course, spoilin’ for a fight. So this may be a personal judgement and as much as they’re bringing politics into their show I’m just backing right on out and going with this :P That he thinks it is more honourable to stay and fight and that Jamil is a hypocrite for not sticking around to work for peace actively.

-

Oh Jamil hooked up with a woman called Darleen. He is FOR SURE in America.

-

It’s so funny to me that Deanchael can fly anywhere and they could have set this anywhere but it still ends up being a wooden cabin in the US. This has to turn out to be a lead to follow with a news report about the poor guy or else this is just hysterical that they couldn’t be arsed to mock up even a hint of another country :P

-

He knew all this about Jamil beforehand so I have to assume he’s really just here to drag him.

-

Man, that throw was GOOD. I’m assuming they either spent all summer playing with wires and stunts or else they’ve gone back to the drawing board on all this flinging people around business.

-

“A better world” oh we are so on for this World Without Monsters malarky still. This lines up with the clip from Dean they opened on so well - the dark irony of he and Michael working on the same project but from different angles. Dean wants to sort out monsters and bad things so he can go on a beach, aka his version of paradise, and Mikey wants to smush all the sinners, and clean up the planet, which is HIS version of paradise.

-

HECKIN GOOD TITLE CARD

now photoshop those wings on everyone

-

I LIKE SCRUFFY BULLET MAKER FROM THE AU.

He’s like so happy to be in a world where you just casually have resources.

Meanwhile poor Maggie has become the de facto nurse and hates it.

Ugh the Bunker is a place where people just show up who yell “Soup’s on!”

In my redshirt betting pool, Soups On is the first guy who dies.

-

Promo sceeeeene

I’m so happy Sam and Mary are doing this together. Last season Sam was so upset that Dean got to have a relationship with her, and he had missed out, but without Dean around - no offence to him - Sam and Mary may be focused on FINDING him but this is the work they also need to do for their relationship to start to ground it in something real. It’s taken this long with all the separations, but remember that Mary also worked through some of her issues about Sam only last season in the AU with 6 month old Jack. And if she needed that sort of reminder and relationship to warm her up for Sam, her suddenly-grown 6 month old, then there were still a LOT of underlying issues that dated back to the start for her to overcome. Hopefully this puts them on a level playing field, though there’s a new conflict brewing for them, with Mary’s determined optimism vs Sam’s pessimism, born of that depression from last season that never really got treated or resolved, they just managed to power past its current main triggers. Of course now it all just shifts in a Deanward direction.

-

I love how Ketch has been punted to London, at Buckleming discretion to drag him back. This wasn’t even Bobo punting him out the door, and he and Buckleming have a violent back and forth over favourite characters, started in 9x06 with Bobo’s very first episode when he banished Professor Morrison forever.

-

MARY TRIES MOMMING SAM TO GO TO BED

THEN SCRUFFY GUN GUY IS LIKE “CHIEF”

Chieeeeeeef.

Sam runs the shooow here and I love it. He’s their badass MoL hunter leader, a scruffy saviour from another world.

Given Sam is wearing the same shirt and jacket in the promo pics I’m guessing he does not sleep, though I hope he gets to eat the soup.

-

“Maggie can you hack the traffic cams?”  
“um. no.”

I love and support Maggie. She is a normal person who happened to live in apocalypse world and she just wants to flirt with the guy from the Gas n Go who probably hasn’t talked to her since that got blown up and Jack attacked him over her… I mean, this is better than the AU world but maybe she just wants to be normal? Did anyone ask Maggie what she wanted??

-

SAM. You can eat your soup and run things at the same time! Get back here and eat that soup!

-

“yes sir”

Goodness, this is wonderful. Sam’s doing what he was born to do, and then not because that was leading a friggin demon army, but then yes because he’s got inherent leadership traits that he defers to Dean all the time because, well, he’s there, and he’s big bro.

Look, sometimes you need big bro to murder Satan’s ass for you forever, but you also should be calling the shots. There’s a balance here, where Dean can be the older brother, but Sam can be the boss. Work/life balance. Dean’s got your back but you command an army of hunters, like we’ve all been salivating over since like season 8 when they first said the MoL ran the Bunker as the hub of operations dictating stuff to trusted hunters and the like.

Of course, if Sam is the Bobby here, then who is the AUBobby? I hope we see what’s up with that soon, I’ve been wanting them to bristle those beards in an alpha way at each other for months, because AUBobby was their leader before Sam because Sir Chief.

-

“Sam.”

“i’m good”

*mothering intensifies*

“i’m GOOD”

*mothering intensifies*

“How’s Jack”

You aren’t used to being mothered and it’s murdering me completely to my soul. Dean’s got SO MUCH MOTHERING all through the show compared to you. He even sees Jody as a mom friend while you crush on her like crazy so you haven’t even got that!!!!

Because Chief Sam is the boss of this lot but at the SAME TIME he’s getting all these soft tender mom moments he’s never got to have before. It’s a wonderful balance of nuances to his current life. He’s overworked but surrounded by a supportive care team that respects him, gives him soup, and holds his hand, literally in Mary’s case. And yet he’s the scruffy macho competent boss who knows how to call all these shots, deputise, set up missions, but still knows more than them, how to do traffic cams, I’m sure years of lore over most of these hunters who only learned to deal with what got thrown at them in the apocalypse by trial and error because when do they get lore books? Mary and Bobby and other pre-apocalypse hunters would be few and far between to offer competent training to a populace suddenly all turned hunter.

-

Oh, AUBobby is beating up Jack. Perfect.

-

AAAH DIRECTED BY TJW

WAS NOT ADEQUATELY HOLDING ONTO SEAT

WARN A GIRL

-

I love finally seeing the training room but I’m deeply conscious that this is where Put Up Your Dukes starts and I can’t get that fan fic out my mind so I’m just like, Jack, don’t lie on the floor, your dads have banged there.

-

I’m so happy that AUBobby is nurturing a grandson, because this is the difference between him and Bobby - that our Bobby had that with Sam n Dean, but AUBobby never did. Though he DID have Mary Campbell to crush on, I doubt it would have softened him and rounded out the harsh places in his soul the same way raising Sam and Dean did, because he had an unrequited love and she hadn’t gotten over John, while this recently widowed Mary Winchester actually has made better progress just because of the circumstances of the loss. Anyways Jack has no preexisting history with Bobby so there’s nothing weird about him and AUBobby stepping into a nurturing relationship, that Sam n Dean would find uncomfortable in a way, given their relationship with Bobby. And Jack gets yet another strong figure to teach and guide him.

AUBobby looks slim and stands tall compared to Bobby, which I’m largely putting down to posture, and not being drowned in layers. I like this difference - Bobby almost never voluntarily dressed in 1 layer, but AUBobby has a more military slant, and this training sergeant routine with Jack is a good fit to show a difference in his character, that isn’t surly old Bobby behind his desk, that he’s involved in teaching Jack to fight, rather than helping hunters with lore and swigging whiskey.

I’d assume given the lack of availability in his AU, he’s considerably less alcohol dependant, so this is a very different character thing. If Bobby were doing this training, and nothing else was different, he’d be taking a breather to pour them both a whiskey as he imparts wisdom.

-

Demon in nice shoes and dark sunglasses at night to indicate that yes I am a demon I have black eyes :P I assume this is a demon anyway not just because of this detail but pre-season spoilers

-

Ah hearing Cas’s name is enough to make my heart pick up. MY GUY!

But then, “Castiel, darling”

Stop trying to make Good Omens happen, it’s not going to happen. You can’t just “darling” up to an angel and expect that good good romance. Crowley took years to wear Cas down and Cas never actually LIKED him, down to their last real interaction where Cas was just “WTF???? LEAVE ME TO ROT AND DIE” when Crowley saved him in 12x12

-

God I miss that

-

“Oh god.”

Same, buddy.

You do, however, realise this is your first words of the season gifset line, though?

Someone ought to write to Dabb and inform him that people make first and last word gifsets and to be more careful.

Especially if in the last episode at the end of the season, Cas’s last word is “Dean”

-

Anyway Cas has said 1 line and I can tell he’s on top form. Unlike 10x01 he’s in a hipster hogroast joint.

-

This demon, with dark black sunglasses inside at night (douchebag) just ordered a coffee, black. WE GET IT, ENOBY DEMENTIA DARKNESS RAVEN WAY, YOU ARE GOFFIC AND IT’S AS BLACK AS YOUR SOUL

-

LOL Cas is sitting under the JACK’S sign.

Demon douche sits under Schultz, which is the death beer. And lemme tell you, TJW is well-versed in this. So well-versed in it he’s sat Cas in front of a classic El Sol flyer with the subtle touch required to tell Dean that Cas is his dream girl. He knows his shit.

-

This seriously seems to be implying that the rise of hipster food joints is an effort from Hell to spread chaos on earth

-

Cas sitting with his back to the fire is such an interesting visual, but this is just a note to self for later to guess what it all means

-

THIS FUCKIN DEMON TOOK  HIS BLACK SUNGLASSES OFF TO SHOW OFF HIS BLACK EYES

Dabb is so good at incidental characters, and making me hate this guy for nuanced nonsensical reasons is amazing. This is… art…

-

This is a callback to 5x08 and Dean ranting about hating procedural cop shows then him and sam taking their sunglasses on and off at night every time they made  a pun and I’m 100% convinced since 12x01 and Cas busting through that Mystery Spot sign that Gabriel has been subtly influencing events

-

Okay so we know exactly what is written on demon bathroom walls. I’m taking that as a sideways confirmation that Cain knew full well that Dean had his Colette because he’d seen crude doodles of them doing it

Anyway douchedemon just outright told Cas that all the demons assume he and Dean in particular are banging. Not that Cas bangs Winchesters, as some have implied, without knowing all the details. They’ve narrowed this info down.

I assume this is also in the Winchester Dossier that Barthamus studied from before meeting them. I love that demons probably do have a filing cabinet somewhere of all the notable assholes they run into in their work, and the Winchesters take up a whole cabinent, but the refresher file summarising them in a paragraph if you don’t have time is like, Sam: Lazy boyking, will stab you. Dean: fucking Castiel, will stab you.

-

Cas doesn’t even move an eyebrow. Incredible.

-

Cas rarely gets hit with these compared to Dean in the history of the show, and Dean is full of bluster or anger or confusion or alarmed eyebrows. Cas is like… no. fuck you. i’m party!Cas, I have my shit in order.

Though this is from a demon. It’s an entirely different thing when Heaven is involved, as they also have their dossier on the winchesters.

Sam: abomination. will banish you. Dean: fucking Castiel. Will stab you.

-

*loud coffee slurp* “what’s in it for moi?

Cas, stab him. Stab him now. This is not worth the information. You can find another guy.

-

I’m starting to think Cas with his back to the flames is his unwitting danger from this hellish hogroast place.

-

They use Shultz beer containers to hold the sauces and menus on the table. DEEEEATH

-

Cas speaking slower and threatening to burn him to ash "right here and right now”

this is a gifset that will get a lot of notes from thirsty Cas fans

-

Whaaaaaaaa the entire joint turned out to be owned by and filled with demons who would ever have guessed based on one open fire and that metal hogs head from the promo pics :P

-

Stop hurting him!!!! Misha can’t stage fight! This is really unfair!!

I wonder how the poor new awesome fight coordinator took to Misha

“let’s just… um…”  
“hide him behind all these demons?” TJW suggests  
The fight guy nods sadly.

-

Aww Sister Jo got back to work. Good for her.

-

Sister Jo has no fear and can stroll down a shady alley counting her money

*t-shirt meme* One fear: *flappy wing noises*

“Hey Jo.”

-

GHOLY SHIT TRUE FORMS TYHUEOJDSHGFSH DS TRUE FORMS WE SEE WHAT ANGELS SEEE OH MY GOD OH MY GOD SCIENCE HAS CAUGH T UP TO THE DIVINE, SPN CAN FINALL Y SHOW US WHAT ANGELS SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

-

Holy shit I want the gif of this as my blog header. That’s shitting amazing.

-

Burning HALO

ALL HIS CHI POINTS LIT UP EVEN WHEN IT MAKES IT LOOK SILLY TO HAVE HIS CALVES GLOWING

-

I wonder if this is what Danneel sees when she looks at Jensen all the time

-

“Why would he say yes to you?”

“Love”

I’m dying and I am dead. I gather that Dean is 100% absent from this episode, but that one comment puts him front and centre and I am in paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaain. Everything happening around Michael and because of Michael is because Dean loves his peeps. From Sam staying up hacking traffic cams on vampires to Cas getting his ass handed to him by demons.

-

I bet Cas looks like that single glowstick he had on in the cave when angels look at him.

-

Party!Cas

-

I ruined the fun

-

Jensen gently touches Danneel’s face and that’s just rude because that’s all his tenderness for his wife being turned into a scary villain move between Deanchael and Jo. Don’t do this to them!!!

-

Oooof Deanchael pulls from Dean’s memory of Anael about what she was like, describing her in the most Cas-like terms, then cuts through her hilarious bull about wanting handbags (this is so meta about sticking middle fingers in the faces of people who think she’s a well-paid beard) and then starts telling her she wants love and a family.

Deanchael has used the word “love” twice in a scene and it’s horrifying to see the word come out of his face, when Dean is so guarded. Now Deanchael is just looking through Sister Jo and analysing what she wants - and she’s playing this game very well but this move of his might still beat her. Because ow. Telling her she wants belonging and family. When she’s very much established as a Cas mirror by the reminder she ran away from Heaven and doesn’t want to play by their rules.

“It’s very, very human of you. And so disappointing.” Did all those times Lucifer sucked her grace bring her close to feeling it? To the point of permanent damage? I only ask because I know another guy this might apply to.

-

I wonder how much Deanchael is projecting based on conjectures because he knows Cas through Dean’s eyes.

-

“But if they’re all these sad, lost, fallen things…” Ya, that’s Cas too for suresies

-

SAM AND JACK SAM AND JACK

Jack sitting quietly in meditation, clearly unsettled. A parallel to 13x23 when Dean came rushing in to him having a nightmare, now Sam is having a crack at parenting the boy.

-

Jack lying about how things were fine. Nougat. Hon. You’re human now. But not that good at being human. Sam knows your tells :P

-

Sam interrupted mid pep-talk by Mary with some nonsense.

Jack is always so ugh… accepting and kinda flippant. He knows parental figures can be disappointing and get dragged away mid peptalk by some business.

Which he’s apparently not involved in. I guess after we see him going on hunts with them in 13x23, he’s grounded until he goes through basic training so not only is he useless to help with his powers to find Dean, but he can’t even do the easy hunter stuff because he’s just a kid.

-

Aww my poor baby Nougat :( He’s so angsty. He’s a TEEN. Lookit him! All growed up!

-

Uuugh I guess this is Nick. “I didn’t talk to him. I can barely look at him.”

What I’m getting from this sequence mainly is the sound of Triss’s rage at the Bunker layout.

-

*Mary pats Sam’s shoulder supportively and walks off*

You’re on your own, Chief.

-

Ugh I am not ready for this bull if it’s Nick but I have to keep watching to be sure :P

-

Ew it is. EW. What does Mark P HAVE on you all.

At least TJW is shooting the heck out of this to show us how gross Sam finds this all.

Sam’s shadow falling over Nick.

I really want to know how this bullshit happened. And yet. No, not really.

-

Oh gross AND they’re making Mark P take off his shirt. The nipple I didn’t want to see in the Road So Far was not warning enough.

Pre-season ugh speculation was that whatever Crowley did to Nick made him stronger and more permanent apparently even than Lucifer being stabbed out of him.

-

So yeah anyway I guess Jack is in part also sulking about this and I’m with him, because Sam being pulled away from their pep talk time to deal with Gross Man Associated With My Father But Not Actually Him Because Biologically I Am The Son Of A Non-Historical President…

-

Making Sam the one who has to care for Nick is utterly cruel. He has so many deputies. Maybe this is just his personal fear that Nick’s still a bit Lucifery. Maybe he just sees this as a gross burden, a manifestation of the ongoing trauma from Lucifer, that even when he’s dead he lingers.

-

Plus, it’s giving us some reassurance that an angel can be ousted from a vessel without killing them, to throw some options into the Deanchael pot.

-

Still. Nick. Really.

-

I bet Jack is sulking because some little cosmic part of him regenerating deep down in his core, that one lil gold glowy chi point in his big toe, knows that Eugenie forgot his name at SDCC and called him “Nick” and this shit from your creator just weighs on you. Jack is an entity beyond Buckleming and yet born from them, and this is what they beget: forgetting their own child in favour of this old carcass.

-

bitter? moi? *sips coffee noisily*

-

Actually, that’s not true but I need some tea because I’m sulky so I’m taking this ragebreak to go make some and then I will sip it noisily in Nick’s direction. :P

-

Everything henceforth is under the jurisdiction of hot drink no.2

-

“I don’t understand how Lucifer could die and I could live”

I hate you

Eurgh, I bet you anything Dabb pulled a Buckleming and just took the post-it note they gave him when he asked, er, HOW does this happen? and transliterated it into dialogue because 1: all the writers shade Buckleming all the time because I can literally see it ooze out of Perez and Yockey and Bobo’s writing but this is the showrunner, guyses. 2: it’s such a dumbass convoluted explanation that it only burns out the archangel but if you non-fatally stab it then the guy is fine.

Which begs the question of how the fuck is Gabriel because if we get anything good from this, that fucker is in one hell of an interesting vessel situation compared to Old Nick.

-

PS: I am not sure how culturally saturated this is so we are all clear that Old Nick is a historically used name for Satan and his name has been a joke since 5x01 thanks to Kripke, and now we have to actually deal with that.

-

And then Nick is actually sympathetic to how Sam feels looking at him. I guess Mark P really wants us to feel sympathetic to his new dude.

-

“And Michael… did he tell Lucifer anything about his plan?”

Listen, we NEED acknowledgement that for a month or so Lucifer and AUMichael roadtripped together to assemble from their AU the key of solomon, the fruit of the tree of life, and the blood of a most holy man.

There was a lengthy downtime while people settled in and Dean was allowed to think the Good Times were rolling, and all that time, the weirdest brother roadtrip show ever was going on in the AU, mad enough that I would actually find it hilarious to watch despite enduring Mark P as a result of it.

-

SAM DOES NOT DESERVE THIS

He’s not allowed to rest, ever.

-

I bet this is douchdemon phoning him from Cas’s phone.

-

“Hello Sam!” says a perky voice down the phone. It’s INCREDIBLE how unlikeable this demon is making himself. He’s actually my favourite character now.

-

Oh no, Nougat is wearing a different grey shirt. He’s really depressed. Someone help him.

-

“He just told you he was a demon?”  
“he seemed proud of it too”

Sam hates him as well. I can’t wait for Sam to come scowl at him.

-

“What do we do?” Maggie asks, completely wide-eyed. Oh honey. Poor, innocent, sheltered Maggie. What were you doing all apocalypse until we caught up with you? You aren’t hardened, you’re adorable.

-

AUBobby and Rufus (his gun)

-

“I’m coming too!” YAY JACK. Your father is in trouble, he’s on a hunting trip and he hasn’t been home in a few days, but what a different world all the rest is

-

“I’m not as strong, but I can help,” he says, looking tiny beside Sam, bruised up from AUBobby’s training, a single layer to make him look even smaller…

(we do not talk enough about how all these jackets are a sort of alpha being shoulder plumping thing like when you make yourself look huge to scare off a mountain lion but that’s 100% what this is)

IT MADE JACK SMILE yey he’s allowed to feel useful! Pop is allowing him to go on a mission to rescue Dad who was looking for Papa when this all went down.

Grandpapa is not so pleased, because AUBobby has been measuring how useful Jack is and I feel like lil Nougat bab is going to do something mildly heroic for Cas or else get pasted for his ongoing character development for the season…

-

“He needs this, Bobby.”

-

Dear LORD does he not quit? We don’t even know his name? “Are you sure I can’t get you anything… hot… or black?” FUck OFF

No wonder by the promo pic Cas looked so utterly done. This is exhaustingly annoying for him. Cas’s personal hell is just irritating people. A line of Crowleys and Lucifers and this jerkwad chattering at him.

-

And yet Dean runs his mouth all the time and Cas is in luuuurve

-

Oh lordy are we really doing this coffee metaphor now? “Coffee has no effect on me” (but he once acquired the taste, and it was a core part of him being human and learning to human in the opening shot of 9x06 for him as his metaphor for how he was learning)

“me either *sluuuurp* not any more. But it’s like saltwater taffy or infants. I just like the taste.”

-

“I’m just being a good host like mother would have wanted”

Cas stops mid eyeroll to eyeroll HARDER at meeting ANOTHER demon with mommy issues. Like, please. Don’t. I like Rowena now but can we NOT.

-

Party!Cas of Dabb era is my favourite iteration of Cas by a country mile.

-

“Why are you using me as bait?”  
“it’s kind of what you’re for”

Oh Cas. Now he’s just the damsel in distress, which I guess is a step up from being an attack dog, but still isn’t that great for the ego stroking about his role and use within the Winchester family, an ongoing source of stress for him, this reminds us.

-

Cas’s faith in Sam is wonderful. like, as soon as douchmon says he needs something from Sam, Cas just SMIRKS like, OH BUDDY. BUDDDYYY. No, I’m not gonna say it. I’m just - “you think he’d make a deal with you?” I’m … I don’t laugh as a rule but inside? Hilarious.

-

“Somebody asked me what it was that I wanted” You know, I think Deanchael is INCITING people. he’s not killing any of them, just using the revelation of his appearance to motivate them - moving Sister Jo to do what she wants, which is to re-organise Heaven with the ideas she had as a button pushing functionary… visiting world leaders and holy men, and this douche…

To what end, though? Chaos? This is a roundabout way to make a better world.

-

“Destroying, Drinking, Defiling, you know, the 3 Ds” they absolutely have posters up in Hell with this on for the newbies to learn.

-

We’ve seen Heaven’s staffroom, I DEMAND to see the break room in Hell, with all its lurid Destiel smut doodled on the walls and so on

-

Anyway it’s a hell of a question, pun intended, because demons have no real purpose, even the named baddies have largely been slaves to someone else’s will (Lucifer or Crowley) and Crowley could not have answered that question from the start of season 6 through to the moment he chose to sacrifice himself… I don’t think any of TFW 2.0 or Bunker Squad could answer it fully. Cas can’t, and that’s the question that’s been bugging him since 9x06 -

EPHRAIM  
Shh-shh-shhh. It’ll be over soon. I’ll take the pain away.

CASTIEL  
I want to live.

EPHRAIM  
But as what, Castiel? As an angel? or a man?

and it’s what his entire crisis in season 10 was over… Who ARE you Castiel? What do you WANT?

-

Dean wants a Beach Vacation Ending. He figured it out and as narrative punishment, he’s Deanchael. No one else has sorted it out, though, but Sam got close - he had his pizza dream and was immediately punished with being eaten by vampires and resurrected by Lucifer and all that drama… Sam’s work isn’t done. Though his growth has taken a huge leap, now he has to figure out what he wants in this NEW setting, and we’re only just MEETING Chief Sam in this iteration, so he’s got a lot of work to do.

-

“I gave it a good think and I worked out exactly what I wanted. Everything.”

Deanchael definitely is planning for this, so watch out buddy.

-

SAM DRIVING, MOM IN SHOTGUN

RED ALERT

-

Uhoh Sam’s snapped because of the optimism Mary exudes. Yep, he really was nearly at the last straw in their earlier convo when he scoffed at her attempts to cheer him up.

Look, she’s trying to mom you with no experience except adopting Jack. Work with her.

-

Sam is spiralling with the depression, this time all the bad things that could have happened to Dean and how they’re never going to find him, throwing these horrible scenarios at Mary to stop her trying to comfort him.

-

“I know. I know he’s out there, scared and alone.” She sees lil 4 year old Dean. Because, I mean, that is the soul Dean bears to her when they have moments sometimes. And her optimism is a wall against thinking of her toddler in this scenario.

“I know. I know he might not come back. Never think I don’t know that. But I can’t - I have to think about the good, Sam. Because if I don’t, I will drown in the bad.” I wonder who that directly relates to who is currently driving this car.

I really hope this is a bit of vindication for Mary - or redemption to the eyes of the people who don’t like her - that she does care, and she’s spelling out her approach to all this. In the start of season 12 when she was trying to keep afloat she used a lot of optimism and furious paddling on the surface, because she has been doing that her whole life. When she was being raised a hunter, when she was a housewife with no clue what she was doing, a mom but he marriage beginning to fall apart… And then thrust into the present day, and it’s 360 degrees of combat and loss and sadness and a ill-advised hook up with Ketch… Furious doggy paddling on the surface.

“For Dean’s sake, I can’t do that. We can’t do that.” And she shows that she is prioritising Dean, that she’s driven and motivated to keep going FOR him.

Come on, give her a chance.

-

Nyooom.

-

Meanwhile in the Jack and Bobby truck, Jack is the one angsting and Bobby is the one driving.

Jack is one years old and not legally old enough to drive.

-

Bobby peptalks him with the reminder that when Jack had his grace he did hero things for these people, which is why he can ride shotgun, and even if he feels useless now, they’ll have his back, that he has earned this squad even if he can’t be as awesome as he used to.

-

Maggie is like, I’m getting a reaction shot… Am I going to develop feelings for Jack? That would be super weird, he’s one years old. I hope no one is implying this even though I’m in a bunch of scenes getting character focus.

-

Eeeeeeee Sam trusts Mary with the demon killing knife. I am sure they don’t call it Ruby’s knife to her and he has never, ever told her about that time that thing happened with Ruby.

-

This fucker had his back turned for Sam to enter just so he could turn around dramatically. God he’s repellent.

-

An extra was hired to pat Sam down. What a job.

-

“The shoulders. The hair! You are my Beyonce!” I mean, same. Except. Cas is Agent Beyonce so this fuckhead has totally misread this situation.

This gives Sam a moment to look over at Cas and Cas silently says, yes I know he’s a total fuckhead, I’ve been dealing with this all day. I’m so sorry bro, can you just stab him so we can go home and follow a different lead. I don’t even care what this one knows, I can’t handle him another minute.

-

“I’m more embarrassed than I am hurt” I understand this to my core, and I’m so sorry, Cas.

-

“Kipling. Kip for short.”

“Cool. Kip. I’m here.” Sam being exactly as “fuck you” as I wanted towards Kip.

Sam is now standing with his head in an El Sol sign. TJW what are you up to bud?

-

Oh no Jack and Maggie got caught skulking. Sam and Cas have the same “my boy!” reaction when they see Cas.

Maggie is here too, you monsters.

But Kip has missed Mary and AUBobby

-

“It’s just late capitalism, you understand” Yeah, and fuck you Kip.

-

How is Kip so irritating that he can make tapping a stool somehow the most obnoxious thing a man could do? He’s WONDERFULLY well-cast. I love this actor. He’s chewing scenery and it’s incredible.

-

“What do you want?” Ow, Sam being twisted into asking the same thing Deanchael asked Kip

-

“Ass-modeus Kentucky Fried” listen you are still the worst but that drew a sympathetic smile and I hate it and I hate you.

-

Oh, Sam just Sammed something from that side glance, random demon side-eye. Oooh. Oooooooh.

But yeah, Kip asking for the “Crowley Deal” as if it’s a package that can be bought from the Winchesters, and not something that Crowley wormed his way into via much back and forth power plays and drama. The Winchester have always had a back and forth with Hell, and since Crowley there have been a lot of demons, like Bart, trying to figure out what exactly it WAS that they all had. But someone has to be in charge, and the Winchesters are the top dog destined hunters with their fingers  in all the world-saving pies, so clashes come naturally. Approaching them like this, first Bart, now this douchenozzle, is meta, presumptuous, overstepping what builds naturally… An attempt to leapfrog to the end where the equilibrium is established.

But Crowley had time to build a long game. These new pretenders are working in a world where the Winchesters’ actions have devastated Heaven and Hell alike, and are, like Mary, just trying to keep afloat on the whole thing.

“We never gave Crowley that deal.” Because yes, that’s how it seemed to play out, and from outsider eyes that’s how it may have looked… But each and every interaction came about naturally through the plot, there was no wrangling it. That’s just how the Winchesters and Crowley ended up.

And that hole can’t be filled by someone just leaping into the chair and asking for it.

Though it is nice if Motown Meats is the new seat of Hell on Earth instead of the outdated exterior asylum interior castle dungeon look Crowley set up.

-

“You’re no Crowley. I know that. So do they.” I think that was what Sam Sammed out of the demons, and also true, and ALSO is this the boyking accidentally exerting himself, knowing what’s good for Hell? I always get a lil tingle in my thumbs when Sam gets too involved in knowing what’s up with Hell.

-

Holy shit Kipling was a Mongolian warlord who rode with Genghis Khan in life. PLEASE survive this episode, I want to hate you all season. PLEAAAASE I BEG YOU.

-

Oh my god this insecure whinging asshole, chowing down on the scenery like there’s no tomorrow. “I’D EAT YOUR HEART” *turns to weepy and quiet* “before I show you who I really am…”

This is Eddie Redmayne in Jupiter Ascending levels of scenery eating. He’s gonna pick up a barstool and take a bite out of it now.

-

Sam is doing this all unarmed, which is something to remember, because this is the fucker who talked his way into killing the Alpha Vamp while MOSTLY unarmed for a majority of that chat.

-

Sam Fucking Winchester.

-

AUBOBBY AND RUFUS!!!!

Also mary.

-

But AUBobby gets a slow mo for Rufus shooting demons.

-

HOLY SHIT MARY’S SLOW MO

I am pregnant

-

MARY THROWING SAM THE KNIFE

-

TJW was like this fight is too fast, my guy. We need to slow it down.  You’re so good at your job no one’s gonna see what happened unless we go slow mo.

he and the fight guy high five

-

“Aw, balls.”

Hey, Nougat tried. He’s got a squishy hero centre.

Looks like he weighs nothing and now he’s human he goes down in one punch. Owie.

-

“Here take this. You know how to use it?”  
“Uh! Stab them with the pointy end!?”  
“pretty much”

Maggie you precious girl why are you HERE. Why is Soups On or Gnarly Gun Guy not here?

-

Cas you fucking damsel in distress

-

Fight guy is like “uuuuh do I have to”

Misha is like “I’m good here, tbh”

-

SAM FUCKING WINCHESTER

(Aw, Kip’s dead, he was fun)

-

“ENOUGH”

YES SIR

-

“There will be NO NEW KING OF HELL”

You are gonna get demon minions like fucking ducklings you ass

-

“Not ever. And if anyone wants the job, you can come through me” Sam is technically immortal so long as Rowena is alive and vice versa you know. Also, how long is he planning on defending Hell? Ever?

I’m stalling from how much I have to scream about how badass Sam was throwing down that declaration that he’s now essentially the trial a pretender to the throne has to pass to take the job.

Because if I was a demon… FUCK NO would I want to tangle with this fucker.

-

Sam’s file, updated: Current King Of Hell. Will Kill You. AVOID.

-

Sam is fucking terrifying. I love it. He scared demons out of their meatsuits. Sam walking into a room is now a reason to eject and abort mission. God. This guy.

-

Remember in season 1 when demons were scary? Oo er this isn’t our sort of thing… halp.

Now Sam looks them in the eye and is like, fuck off. I’m scarier than any of you.

-

“That’s what I thought”

Cas is literally giving you the reverse look of in 4x16 when you marched in and fried Alastair’s brain.

-

SAM GOT A NEW SHIRT thank god.

I should amend: he did all this wearing blue plaid with orange stripes.

Sam Fucking Winchester.

The BMoL definitely didn’t have the right birth certificate because that’s his legal middle name.

-

Sam n Caaaaas my GUYS. I hope this is the 10x01 convo but, like, not. Flip flip flip those pancakes, Dabb my guy.

-

Cas, hon, you’re still so beat up you have blood trails coming out of your nose. There’s not really caring about your meatsuit because it heals eventually, but there’s also washing your fucking face, because Sam’s had time to change his shirt and get a beer so what were you doing?

-

Probably staring at a picture of Dean on his phone and sighing.

-

Anyway he’s here to ask how Sam is, rather than care about himself. Symbolism.

“I’ve been better. And worse.” Worse is 10x01.

Or 4x10’s flashbacks. For sure those are the worstest.

Though, this time you are the king of hell and you’re wearing a dark shirt and I don’t think you have thought this through.

-

The most well-meaning accidental king of hell ever.

-

Sam and Cas share the “to find Dean I’d do anything” look. Be CAREFUL. Cas is literally choosing to wear hubris on his face because he feels bad about his fuck up with going to Kip.

-

Mary! Casual Mary chilling in the kitchen!!

Although, with everyone in the bunker, these rooms are taking on different meanings. The people are chasing out the heavy shadows and ghosts of all the oppressive silences Sam and Dean have filled these corners with.

-

Aw it’s Mary and AUBobby. I was half-hoping we’d have her giving beer to Jack, but I guess we need to set up the forward momentum on their relationship for this season.

“Not bad today, old man.” “you too, Sunshine.”

You do realise that Mary is sitting in the exact same spot as where Dean was when he called Cas “Sunshine” You do know that right I mean you KNOW? This is TJW, he knows. He’s a Destiel Shipper of the highest order.

-

Cas pops in on Jack, staring at his busted up face in a mirror, now filling more Winchester angst tropes to make up for lost time.   
“I’m fine,” he says without being asked.  Because 10x01 or 10x02 was where Cas defined “fine” for Hannah and explained to her it’s what humans say when things are really not fine but they can’t admit it.

-

“You did well.”  
“All I did was get punched. In the face.”

I love snarky teen Jack.

“To be fair, we all got punched in the face,” Cas says, still covered in hubris.

He has a POINT. He has full right to pull the “I should feel more useless than you” card on Jack.

-

Jack doing the “i’m useless” thing that Cas had to go through when he lost his grace, and Jack was allowed to stay in the Bunker. Is this how Cas would have felt had he not been kicked out?

-

Jack says Michael’s out there and he still feels responsible to stop him. There’s a very, very very very ver very weird Hamlet vibe from Jack, being forced into a position of emotional responsibility to kill his uncle, but Cas is his once dead now back and not a ghost father, and Jack couldn’t kill Michael and so Dean got possessed… I mean, it’s not a neat overlay, but Jack wants to kill an uncle, an AUncle, and I feel like in terms of uncle-killing narratives, AU Michael making off with Dean fits about as well to Hamlet’s uncle marrying his mom as we’re gonna get… I’d love to see how this shapes out because these family narratives since season 11 are becoming deeply shakespearean in the amount of nonsense going on. This sort of supernatural drama is a modern world way to have this kind of heightened emotion and the stakes you find in Shakespearean tragedies, and to force the sorts of reflection on the world and self… I really really dig it. Watching season 13 yesterday really hit me with this feeling all over and I’m delighted that Jack has this arc because I’m so amused/interested to see where this weirdo Hamlet parallel goes for him.

-

“I don’t have anything.”  
“Oh Jack” thanks Cas that’s what I said out loud “you have me. You have all of us. You have your family.” *SHOULDER GRASP*

No hug. Fuck off Cas, with your reassuring shoulder grasps. I know that’s the language you’ve been taught but Dabb era is hug era and you suck.

-

I love that with all of Sam and Mary’s doubt and Jack’s lack of self worth, it’s down to CAS. CASTIEL. CASTIEL WINCHESTER. CASTIEL FUCKING WINCHESTER. PARTY!CAS. to give the actual pep talk of the episode which has ANY conviction behind it. Cas has been fuelled with something MAGNIFICENT since the Empty, and he’s turned it up to 11 for Jack here :’)

-

Jack makes the smallest smile, then turns back to his mirror.

-

Sam opening the door to his bedroom, framed in darkness. 10x01 parallels again - this shot as well as the demon dean one were repeated a few times through the 3 episode arc, and the demon dean one became iconic but Sam did it too, to Dean’s room. Now he goes into his own… empties his pockets… he still has the fucking engraved money clip from Tall Tales because Gabriel is not only not dead but telling this entire story for us… He has the phone, that’s off, because Dean is not there, not communicating with him, blah blah. And he has the keys to the Impala. Because he’s the chief.

Well, the King of Hell. Damn, it took 14 years to get him there. Azazel is fucking spinning in his grave.

-

Ooh, phonecall! Is it Deanchael? “What do you want?”

Nope, it’s Sister Jo! :D She’s been standing there ALL NIGHT weighing her options and working out what she wants.

SPIN THAT CHAOS, DEANCHAEL.

-

Deanchael approaches a vampire, and it’s that purity of Purgatory, that just wanna eat that fuelled so much of the badass stuff in season 7 with the Leviathan, everything Dean’s struggled with when it comes to the black and white world of killing monsters no problem that dates back to Gordon in 2x03, that draws Deanchael to them. Because this is Dean’s safe space with Benny, a real relationship based on a bond forged in pure, kill or be killed, eat or be eaten purgatory. Deanchael has the same inner machinery as Dean, because Michael is the worst version of Dean, engineered to be Dean but without love. Dean as a monster. And so it all leads here… D:

-

Well this will be fun :D


	2. 14x02

I appear to be fully booked for the whole weekend through to Tuesday so this may be the only thing I post about the episode until then, hope you all are having as much fun as Cas will at the party he’s apparently gonna throw to prove he’s cooler than all the other angels.

-

*readjusts my beanbag chair from Professional Sloucher to Serious Typing Mode* It’s 5:13am and I’ve been awake 45 minutes watching this thing download and paused the new Adventure Zone episode for this… Mittens assures me it’s well-recieved, so I’ll go ahead and assume we burned enough sage to ward off the worst of whatever happens to their episodes…

Or, of course, Speight is directing.

So, expectations are pretty nebulous, because at this point in the story I really don’t have demands, hopes or fears, except maybe that Buckleming don’t handle or if they do, don’t maul having Dean back. I DO miss Dean. It’s very possible if he showed up in this episode everyone loves it because Dean-o is back.

I’ve never voluntarily called him Dean-o before. I think Gabriel’s influence over the season is contagious.

Speaking of which… *hits play*

-

Are we getting a recap of Christian Keyes getting smushed because he, also, is alive? (er, the vessel, I mean) It would balance out Nick a great deal but it’s also almost too much to ask I feel

-

14x01 recap: good, no sign of wirework. 14x02 recap: bad, everyone is levitating.

-

Also hilarious - no recap whatsoever of the past episode, because we have entered the Buckleming AU. Which is either Speight’s shade or Buckleming’s hubris that they don’t need no canon to tell them what to do.

-

Nice. Creepy. Good start, sir. 10/10 would immediately go over and try and play that cursed piano despite my fear I would die instantly.

-

asdhdjsfkdsf the detail that Mikey took  his hat off and a dramatic shot of it sitting there with the same reverent detail as the other spooky things from the rest of the intro shots

-

Interestingly the vampire that Mikey is bleeding is presented in much the same way as Lucifer was in 13x21, left to just stand there and dribble essence from the neck which making small choking noises. This is either stuck pig imagery, or the suggestion from unknown powers that be directing this to suggest that the entire Lucifer concept is being bled dry by wringing Nick out of it too.

-

This isn’t going to end well.

While he’s doing that, I would like to ask if that’s a smidge of his own grace, or if he went and found Metatron’s or something.

It also is very reminiscent of Lucifer creating demons - experimenting and playing to create the worst of the worst. Alastair and Lilith had white eyes and Lilith could do some sort of evil smite. The first demon, and the only one we’ve ever seen do that. Fandom long headcanoned that Lucifer used his own grace to make her, and it makes sense in a weird way that as he gets more corrupt, so do his creations - from pure white-eyed demons to murky yellow eyes to red and pitch black. Also: get more stupid. Azazel is the best and smartest, and each YED we met, if we assume they’re in age order… Asmodeus is so dumb as a pile of rocks that you have to assume Lucifer realised that whatever he did to perfect the recipe in Azazel was tapering off and the good good stuff was over, so no more YEDs before you find out what Asmodeus’s little sibling would have been like. His next known canonical attempt to make a demon isn’t using his own grace, but using the Mark of Cain to corrupt, er, Cain.

Mikey is falling into this exact same nonsense from the opposite direction of his brother, AU or otherwise - humans are bad, corrupt evil things are better because they’re less complicated and as an angel, humans give me a headache. Michael seems at least to have believed that there were good people - if he could just flipping find them - and that if he smote all the sinners maybe some good people would be left. It’s coming at the same conclusion from opposite problems - he has earnestly sought out the best in humanity and then ended up scouring even the worst like Kip and those killers he mentioned, and finally settled on monsters, Eve’s corruptions of humanity into bloodthirsty creatures motivated only by hunger. And now he’s playing with them and using his own power to corrupt them further.

-

PS: Eve is going to be SO PISSED

-

That IS a very effective way to smite a vampire.

-

He’s very clean and efficient and while he’s “getting his hands dirty” in the metaphorical sense, there’s a very careful remove in the actions we see on screen, of him standing watching very impartially.

-

He also sounds a shade more Dean-ish in that quip, and let’s just go ahead and assume that the quip unlocked Dean a lil, or else that being in this vessel so long is beginning to wear on Michael - the influence goes both ways, and it’s like seeing Captain Holt from B99 crack and quip, except this is the lawful evil version.

Plus, the flippy flippy and all… He’s getting comfortable. I bet Michael might have been able to do SOME cool flip with a knife but trust me, you’re possessing the second most blade flippy guy on this planet, second only to his husband, so that’s a full perk of being in the Michael Sword and nothing else.

-

No one has asked Cas how he feels about AU Bobby, which is weird because he and Bobby were BFFs back in the day.

Trust me, it happened off screen. Sometimes Cas flapped up smelling like whiskey and cigarette smoke and Dean would be like dammit did you just come from poker night with Bobby and I wasn’t invited?

(True behind the scenes details from season 5)

-

AUBobby wants a beach vacation as much as Dean does, though. Well, he wants to hunt by the sea.

-

Okay I never knew “veracity” could be used as a synonym for “voracity” but google assures me that people are literally just really lazy about it because I THOUGHT AUBobby meant voracity, but he SAID veracity, and I was like, why is he saying angels aren’t known for telling the truth??? and then my other part of my brain that is more sensible but works slower caught up with the context… This language is stupid. I apologise to second language speakers for that line. It was said “veracity” but it means “voracity” because we are a garbage culture, as english speakers as a whole.

So yeah, angels aren’t known for their partying, no offence, party!Cas.

This is now 2x between here and 13x20 that Cas has been directly accused of not partying, plus how he went to a party in 13x22 even if he stood stock still the entire time, so I have to assume that the rise of party!Cas is gaining narrative and symbolic momentum and we WILL see him kicking back by the end of the season.

“None taken, I tend to agree with you.” TEND, as in, other angels are stuffy assholes who never party, but I, party!Cas, have stood with my arms by my side and a stoic expression, all through your welcome to paradise!earth party, so *I* am in fact, cool.

-

He misses those poker nights. Ellen and Jo taught him well.

-

AUBobby has a perhaps Jim Beaver-honed response to “it’s Dean” when worrying about what’s up with it. Or, of course, as much as he may have come to like the guy since the AU rescue, this was still a lil test of why they had to be concerned, leaving it to him as the one guy in the room who is still getting to know him, to say what is unspoken by everyone else.

-

Sam then prompts Cas to give us some clunky exposition on why he can’t come, because Michael will sense him.

Buckleming, you literally are the ones who say Cas down in a chair and had him tattooed to ward him against angels. That was your thing. You did that. You.

It may be a sign of improvement that Cas is being left behind with specific explanations for why, but it’s still hard to read Misha’s expression as between Cas Is Sad He Can’t Go Near Dean, which is crazy he’s not putting up a fight and going anyway, and I Have To Say This Line To Explain It And They Don’t Teach You How To Say Bad Exposition In Drama School.

“Yeah sorry”

This deserved at least 2 more lines of contention and scowling, or, of course, Sam proposing this to Cas on the spot, or Cas himself regretfully announcing that he had to do it to give them the best chance in a self-sacrificing way, then rationalising it with having to stay behind to babysit.

-

Cas just said Jack wasn’t an infant. He’s a year old. He’s barely even a toddler yet. You really read that many parenting books and don’t know that?

Okay yeah. Anyway lumping Nick and Jack together as charges to watch - a suggestion somehow that they’re a joint burden? It demeans Jack to Nick’s place, in the context. Cas hasn’t actually had a great deal of on-screen parenting to Jack except like 2 nice moments basically bookending the entire time they’ve both been alive on the show in 13x06 and 14x01, and I’m going to have to chalk this up to a lil anxiety about bonding with the sulky teen Jack that it’s something Cas now feels apprehension about. He’s the father who’s rarely home and clocked in the least time nurturing Jack directly, while Mary has a wild lead and Sam and Dean both also a good chunk of it, with Sam pulling weeks ahead of Dean, of course.

A sense of Dad Who Is Always At Work Forced To Bond With Child While Mom(s) Are Gone, to use some heteronormative tropes, feels like it’s at play. The dad who is always away on business trips is forced to spend time at home over Christmas with the kid while the other parents are on a wild vacation to Florida… What fun scrappy bonding experiences do they get up to?! :D

Of all the tropes flying around, to stick to heteronormativity, Cas has always been “the father” to Jack while others around him waver between maternal roles or not. But even in the very start, he “completed” the parental “set” with Kelly.

Is that enough airquotes to be clear I support non-traditional family structures? :P

But it puts Cas also in a place of having some of these toxic masculinty types of fatherhood, of being away for work all the time and not putting in the work for the kid or being too eager to fight and sacrifice himself than to be there. Hard as he works to protect them all, his connection IS that of the guardian angel who watches over, the one sworn to protect, who most often talks about his bond to Jack under that obligation and that promise to Kelly, the sense of a duty to protect Jack, but very little in the way Sam especially fell hard on the side of “nurture” in the nature vs nurture debate and put in all the emotional labour associated with the mother in traditional parenting structures.

(This was good for Sam to do considering Dean had done it for him, and because Dean did it for him - being both mother and father - he’s largely exempt and can dip in and out of how he parents Jack with impunity, given he had his moment about this in 12x22, days before Jack was born, and was therefore freed from character arcs grappling with it in the same way)

-

Cas is like “Nick is a MESS” same, buddy.

“He was housing, he deserves a shot at rebuilding his life” Sam is talking about himself here, which is weird because Nick was the topic of discussion a moment ago

I feel weird that Sam is admonishing Cas here, because Cas has not lain on the floor and thrown a tantrum about not going to save Dean, as ungrateful as he is being about babysitting Nick… it’s making a weird conflict between Cas and Sam which is now veering into a philosophical argument about Nick, which makes me feel that if this is not just weird Buckleming dialogue issues where they find it hard not to write things as a conflict, Sam and Cas haven’t had the rosy bro bonding time together while Dean is gone that it seemed, or that, like with Sam snapping at Mary about her optimism, Sam’s in a Mode about this where he’s on his last rag with everyone secretly because of lack of sleep. And Chief!Sam may also be struggling with being an authority figure among his own family, as every single one of them “outranks” him in age, parenthood, experience or scowliness, and Sam once described himself as “the least of all of you” meaning Bobby and Cas specifically of the people who in this room he’ll find himself naturally deferring to. Sam’s leadership is natural among the AU peeps but perhaps a struggle that with his family, he’s still the leader, but there’s no Dean to have the final word, and that in itself is an awful reminder, when he finds himself being the last word on a subject without Dean’s input.

I have to assume this is like 5am and AUBobby showed up early to work to see Mary and the rest of the AU peeps aren’t around yet

-

Cas then throws in the line about how all he can see is the supreme agent of evil, which is fuckin hilarious that it was Sam’s trauma yesterday and we know angels are much more likely to relate to the glowy blob possessing a face, and anyway most of Cas’s worst Lucifer trauma came from being POSSESSED by him, seeing him wearing Sam’s face, or being beat up by Vince fucking Vincente. You only really ever saw Lucifer as Nick in 12x23 and the last few episodes of season 13, bar like one encounter back in 5x10. That is a very very recent association.

Unless, of course, he’s still MIGHTILY PISSED that Lucifer killed off 2/3rds of his poker game and that’s where his “supreme evil” trauma comes from.

Let’s go with that.

-

Do you think Eugenie forgot that Lucifer was an hallucination in season 7, and also that Cas was dead during that?

(don’t @ me about him seeing hallucifer in 7x17, he said in 7x21 that he stopped seeing hallucifer pretty quickly and I’m going with Edlund canon when in doubt :P)

-

“You talking about my dad again”

Jack. Hon. You have absolutely no relation whatsoever to Nick, except via whatever family line ties him extremely vaguely to Sam as a similar vessel of Lucifer. I don’t even know how to describe where that puts him on your fucked up family tree, but trust me, you don’t need to worry. Biologically, you are the son of an ex-president of the united states.

But yeah, snarky!teen Jack is here in full force. I’m not sure I’m ready to deal with the baby’s angsty melodrama years :’D

-

Do you think

and I ask this hypothetically while full of dread that I am right

do you think Eugenie has forgotten that Jack is not Nick’s biological son

-

Jack getting the good good framing of standing with his back to the war room, trapped in the library, as he’s grounded. This central framing demands the eye to seek out wings, but in this case they’re kinda furled behind him, if you see them as the dark shadows of the room beyond.

Of course the war room/library symbolism is always a thing, that action is the former, home the the latter, so this is clever to show Jack’s desire, but also that he is stuck, and we see the bar patterned lights on the floor in the war room which are used as prison imagery. Jack’s effectively locked out of the war room with a baby gate.

-

“Let’s move,” Sam says, with a virile pump of his gun, leaving Cas and Jack to feel impotent at home.

-

Sam does not get the dick imagery often enough

-

Blargh Nick again. Hello fuckface. Listen, I just wanna say before we get into this scene, that I’ve almost universally seen Mark P eyerolled at but said “at least he’s a really good actor so the scenes were really good even if he sucks as a person and we hate Lucifer”. I do not agree. I think he’s a ham who over-acts and it was annoying as Lucifer but by this point expected and had at least transitioned slowly, but seeing Nick do the whole routine of standing up from bed, and then blowing on his stab wound and wincing and fanning it? That whole thing was just… too much for me. Nick should have been still and quiet and sad, but as soon as he started doing that it harked back to Lucifer in 13x13 when he was cold and hungry and over-acting rubbing his poor empty tum tum and rubbing his freezing arms. What made Mark P so good in season 5 was that Lucifer had a slow, cold and STILL menace to him, that while he might have gestured widely and been violent, especially in his dramatic scenes he was still and menacing. That’s all gone by now and he acted Lucifer as a clown, and fair enough as an acting choice I guess when this isn’t my favourite character or actor, but now it’s salt in the wound that Nick was supposed to come across sad and vulnerable, and instead of bestowing some gravitas on him and taking us back to the start and actually TRYING, Mark P fell into clowning as if he thinks doing these funny things is what his fans who are apparently out there want to see, and my stretched to breaking point lie I repeated to myself about “oh he’s a good actor at least” shattered because he was just playing the fool again, over-acting as if to gain cheap sympathy points, when his stillness and sadness and NOT overacting was literally the only way to have pulled Nick off without it being annoying.

This is a cake and eat it, well Lucifer is dead but I’m still here, and now I will act almost exactly the same, kind of dealio and I’m pissed and not standing by that self-comforting lie any more because every single step of the Lucifer journey so far since 11 we’ve placated ourselves with various phrases and concepts to make it okay to do all this but keeping Nick around is where the story breaks and so too does my patience for forgiving it.

-

*Cas employs his Anti Nick Shoulders* I deeply approve of these shoulders

-

Could they not give Nick, like, a sudoku book or something? He is just sitting here wallowing in having been Lucifer.

-

Omg Cas is getting to use this to actually talk about himself. I’m actually liking this. Cas self-reflection is a wonderful thing. Everyone can relate to Nick, even if they hate it. Every single person will file in here and talk about themselves to Nick at some point or another.

Nick’s like “why am I heeere” and Mr Giant Teddy Bear is like “I know right?”

-

Wait is Nick’s son called Teddy? That was unfortunate mind-melding with BL I just did. *shiver*

Also hilarious: a chosen flashback to Nick holding a teddybear beside the crib and I swear to all that is holy that Speight is deliberately implying after reading the line “Teddy” that Nick said yes to Lucifer on behalf of his wife Sarah and this bear.

I can SEE his face making a note here about what flashback to cut to.

His sparkling eyes are reflecting off this screen so much I’m getting glare from it.

-

*Mark P cries a lot* There are a few little leaps in this conversation to get to the point too quickly but overall this wasn’t a bad scene… Perhaps because Cas carried it enough with his sinscerity that Nick wailing was at least balanced and the directing matched the intensity of it all. Speight really is good at making things work and this was pretty brutal which means that the overacting is compensated for, and Cas inserted enough genuine emotion from an empathetic character.

It’s all hovering unspoken about family where Nick does it for his wife, even if he regrets it now and feels like he has become a monster and is wracked with a guilt Cas can heavily relate to as it drove his season 12 early actions intensely, and his child. Cas also did it for family, and they give this definition of family where it could be anyone beloved in the family, so that platonic overlap is there between Cas and Nick’s motivations. But implicit is that Nick’s wife was the one that made him say yes, and Cas stands over Nick in much the way that Lucifer stood over him in 5x01 when appearing as Sarah. Cas is/was the wife in the scenario in a weird way to Dean, for whom he chose to be possessed to save from Amara, aka the monster that had come into the house and would kill his beloved ones in their beds.

-

Promo scene! Aw AUBobby and his rusty FBI skills.

-

The coroner talking about a spree killer harks to Dean’s issues balancing being a serial killer with a saviour, as I talked about pre-episode with the themes connected to Dean being possessed by Michael, and channelling all the worst of him. In this case, the torture AND the wantonly killing vampires

-

God damn Mary’s red suit is awesome though.

-

“neck wounds” I thought Mikey healed those? I guess I can see residual scarring on this body so maybe healing vampires isn’t as neat as healing people, because corruption…

-

“Why is an archangel hunting vampires in the first place” HAVE YOU MET DEAN? This is how he blows off steam when he gets a HANGNAIL. You think being possessed by Mikey will stop him?

-

“Huh” Sam says. “huh,” I say, because they actually did some Smart Detective Work to come to that conclusion and perhaps this is just because BL needed the next lead but we’ve never actually seen them ask this specific question about people coming to identify mystery bodies to find the next lead ever. And perhaps because even if it happens off screen it’s a dead end in all their other cases, but this was still something BL wrote that put a clever concept in Sam’s head, and I am at the bottom of the barrel with them when I’m complimenting them for not making the characters act like complete idiots.

The other thing is, this cuts out an entire scene of them in a motel opening a laptop and googling surveillance footage, and I don’t know if they have been banned from writing the everyone sits around and googles the monster scenes, at least since they made Crowley pop in and google a photo of the president in 12x08, and then Dabb openly mocked them for it in 12x23, but it’s a pacing GODSEND to have the characters act intelligent and ask questions that solve problems instead of relying on the magical answer box to tell them where to go next.

See again: low low low expectations. Whether it’s Speight clean up work or they’ve been told off, this is great stuff, and files off a lot of the edges that make their episodes wearing on a cosmic, soul level, that between the weird content, they’re also just clunky and poorly paced.

-

Cas n Jack sceeeene.

It’s Jack’s desk! I’m so happy!!

I asked hypothetically the other day on a promo pic and I’m so happy to see Jack has his own lil desk in the library. He looks like a kid doing his homework

my heart is swelling

with all the table meta - it’s another thing where they’ve changed stuff around to give Jack a space, a place he calls his own in this large weird Bunker. That table had to be dragged from one of the side offices or store rooms and set up for him because it’s never b een there before, but now Jack has an alcove of the library he calls his own and he can sit there and do his research… And the alcoves give a sense of an enclosed room space, something comforting and like… library womb like.

The Bunker has adopted him :’)

It’s so weird seeing a character in this show who habitually doesn’t wear a ton of layers around the Bunker - he’s been in a t-shirt with nothing over it in both episodes, grey. He’s young, open, honest, but hasn’t found his way yet, hasn’t got a tribal colour scheme. No plaid, and has only worn beige and blue in neutral Cas colours, his main father figure in a sort of aspirational sense, even if Cas is the dad who’s always out on work and not there to raise his son.

Jack’s identified as human in 13x23 but in a way he is a homunculous - the concept of what was originally believed to be how babies formed in a sort of medieval/rennaisance time (perhaps still is by BL) that the sperm was a tiny weeny complete person and they just got put in the womb with no other input from mommy and grew there. There’s definitely a weird shade of homunculous implications in how Jack’s parenthood is talked of, and of course he was then born as a fully formed man, which is a sort of transliteration of this nonsense belief, but the concept that he practically was a small adult Jack and then a big adult Jack and at no point an actual baby. Even in the womb in 12x17 we saw him turn and stare at the camera, betraying a sort of primal intelligence, the idea of a bored god waiting in the womb to be born, learning and acting from within.

And only now is he sort of set up to stop being a baby and start being a man when it comes to handling adult intellectual stuff and he’s not learning from scratch but is treated like he has a more solid baseline for the world around him these days. He’s learned enough to join society, but not enough to have carved his place yet. It’s a very strange cusp of growth, and perhaps a good metaphor for being a teenager, in a way: that you realise you have been very stupid up to this point but now you are very smart and ready to be an adult (except, unfortunately, adult peoples will look back at this unformed humonculous version of themselves with the greasy hair and poorly understood radical political opinions and whatever, and be like, WOW, I was an idiot.)

-

Oh my god are BL really going to keep writing Good Cas Lines this episode? This stuff where Cas schools Jack gently and lovingly with knowledge Jack has been up all night reading then Cas is like yeah this is stuff angels know from angel sunday school but I’ll be kind about it and validate what you just read… Like, the lesson is the act of the research, more than the knowledge. It’s up to Jack not to feel stupid that he did all that work and Cas was like, yeah. I knew that. I’m an angel.

-

OH MY GOD Cas is actually having the chat I wanted with Jack about how he felt when he lost his grace

*shoves a fistful of popcorn in my mouth*

Jack all hurr blurr you don’t understand I want to go run to my room and slam the door because I’m a teen and I have just discovered human tragedy and angst, NO ONE IN THE HISTORY OF EVER HAS SUFFERED AS I HAVE

and Cas is like, *ruffles his hair* it’s okay little buddy, I too was a homunculous in season 9, which Lizzy has a weird deja vu feeling she wrote about but would not for the life of her know where to find that because it was probably buried in watching notes

-

“what did you have left?”  
“well I had Sam and Dean… but I had something else”

me: *clutches chest, gasps, hangs on tenterhooks*

Cas: “I had myself”

me: FLAILS WILDLY

Sorry, this isn’t very meta, I’ve just written so much on the nature of grace and of Cas, and whether he has a soul or not still, but he is very much talking about the time when as a human he had a soul and was “himself” without his grace, and though he felt the loss of his POWER he didn’t feel a loss of his CORE SELF, of who he is (which is an ongoing question they’re all answering about themselves, with Jack Homunculous Winchester as the main example to channel the others through). It’s really important to me that Cas has this core self, this certainty of who he is beyond his duty, his grace, everything that is forced on him by Heaven, but that this part of him who he may or may not know is his soul is there and filled with, well… Cas’s nougat centre. Because Cas has been playing THAT game far longer than Jack has :P

“The basic me. As Dean would say, without all the bells and whistles”

Dean is reaching through Cas to mock him for us when we don’t have him in the room to directly accuse Cas of having a harp, and I love that Cas loves Dean so much that he lets Dean drag him for having bells and whistles (which Cas will take literally) even though he’s not here.

That’s true love.

-

They share what is possibly the grossest smile ever and I am going to weep to see all this fondness for each other and for Dean being expressed. Like, ugh, families loving each other and being all wholesome and sweet. What is this garbage.

-

“You know, Sam and Dean… they weren’t born with their expertise” yeah because they’re not fuckin homunculi

Cas is basically equating Jack to going back to the start that they had, a do-over on his life, that he lived his first year as a magical all-powerful baby, but in a weird way, losing his grace makes him more settled, gives him a chance to understand himself without his power and learn that he still has a core self, a soul with all the good stuff in it, and to begin again and learn things the slow way, but a way in which he will grow more naturally and take the lessons that are needed to form the real edges to a character that turn into maturity.

“They’ve been at it since they were children”

and so have you. filed under: ow.

Literally no one on TFW had a normal safe happy childhood free of monsters metaphorical or otherwise.

-

Anyway Cas then reminds Jack that he has to do things slow to be as good as Sam n Dean, and moves on to it’s important not who you were in your past - because this fuckin one and a bit year old already has a gritty past - but who you are and what you will do with the FUTURE. And Cas still wholeheartedly believes in Jack because of Jack once showing him a vision of the future that they might have - the happy ending, world without monsters, all that jazz that Dabb era is eyeing up  hopefully.

-

Oooh Mikey’s going to a partyyy.

That fuckin ring on his little finger. It’s coded especially in media that he’s either in a cult or gay. It’s such a weird lil detail for Mikey to have added to the ensemble that I almost wonder if he smited a guy to borrow it wholecloth and took every detail. Though he’s a fucking fashionista so maybe he can’t resist adding a detail like this.

After all he wore dirty war-torn clothes for years in the AU, but even then had a sense of grandeur about it, an over-dramatic flair with the long coat that said that he dressed well, even for the scenario, and different, standing out from the rest of his minions.

Now he’s here on paradise!earth, with all the tailors you could ask for, so he’s going to dress like the lord of this planet it’s begging for, in all the finery you can drape his fine sword in.

Sword does not approve of bowtie.

DEAAAN! HEY! I’VE MISSED YOU ILY

“GET OUT”

“I don’t think so”

WOW, RUDE. There’s rules about this, buddy!

“You can’t!”

“oh but I can, because, see, I own you.” It IS Michael who punches the mirror… I was certain it would be Dean, but it’s Michael lashing out at his angry reflection, shattering the image of Dean. What a metaphor. In the Mark of Cain arc sometimes Dean looked at himself in shattered mirrors but it was a passive shattering. This is a statement from Michael that he can see Dean and he’s shattering his entire self, refusing his right of consent - in a BL episode it’s ironically hilarious so long as nothing else dub con happens, that this is the actually seriously applied good use of consent stuff. And Michael talking about owning Dean - it’s that presumptiveness about others’ consent that was Dean’s biggest downfall in putting Gadreel in Sam, the cosmic karma lashing back out at Dean that he can’t punt Michael out like Sam heroically punted Gadreel out, because Michael OWNS him. Dean is historically, cosmically, always for eons before his birth, been “the Michael Sword” - a true vessel with this guy’s name inscribed on the hilt, and Michael has calmly taken full possession of his ultimate weapon, because well, why not.

UGH and then Michael takes control again by way of talking into the mirror and his reflection behaving normally because he’s wrangled it back into control. A+ DIRECTION, SIR.

(Also because it’s not Dean - maybe it’s not so much a meta detail but the expectation might be that Dean would lash out at Michael BECAUSE he’s angry and lashes out and smashes mirrors so many times, but he has no control to even move an arm to lash out… He’s utterly trapped, just like Cas was tied to that chair.)

-

I love seeing Cas storming confidently around the Bunker running stuff while the others are out, being the one who is looking over Jack, taking the calls about their findings, and now dealing with Nick wandering in to angst some more. This is Cas at home and although it’s still weird the AU peeps are ALL taking a day off coming into work after seeing how embedded they were in the hub, it’s wonderful to see Cas here and without the AU peeps it is more cozy in the sense of being more like the home they privately kept.

-

Nick comes in like I WANT TO SOLVE MY COLD CASE THIS IS MY RANDOM DISTRACTION FROM THE PLOT

but then Cas puts his hand on his shoulder and he flicks back to Lucifer in an instant, trying to dissolve Cas in a panic from being touched. Cas is understandably completely and utterly freaked out.

And for all our talk of Rowena and Sam and their trauma from Lucifer, of course Cas has had a lot too even though I’m kinda eye-rolly about him talking about Nick as the face of all evil, of course this episode has been about his Lucifer trauma so far. It’s really interesting to see Cas rattled by something because he is so solid most of the time - last episode he exuded “fuck you” from every pore for every moment except briefly when Jack was dragged into the room. But Nick has him on edge and now there’s some Buckleming fuckery afoot with ongoing vessel issues, we’re seeing the very strange visual of a Cas who is legit freaked out.

-

Anyway I really like how smooth this was, even with camera changes. Speight is really wringing excellence out of them, and the script, weirdly, and maybe because it’s Nick so Eugenie is focused, is actually contemplative and full of interesting emotional conversations, which they often seem to blow off whatever the brief. Even with the dialogue hindrances, the real meaning and depth is being plumbed by the scenes as a whole.

-

So yeah, here is where I have to grudgingly say MarkP can play evil kinda well but also considering, again, FOUNDER OF THE AMERICAN CAPITALIST PARTY? This is his calling, and he is a caracture of the man who plays the devil.

And this is something rather scary and sinister about what’s going on with him which genuinely is played with some of that season 5 gravitas, which is super weird to see because I have got so used to him being a clown, even in his previous episode.

I have to say, due to that, I give Speight a lot of credit because he’s really, really good at his job.

-

“What went through your head just now?” I ask that a lot, and thanks for the reaction gif, Eugenie.

I need very little prompting to assume you are writing Nick and Brad is writing the rest.

Nick is a fine line of guilty and confused, and hiding his intent, either because he doesn’t know, or he DOES. It’s good. Credit where credit’s due.

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“Some of his influence still within you” it’s CRUEL to give that line to misha.

Kinda meta that there’s a cockles joke from an old JIB or something about “influence” as jizz and 13x21 and all the jokes about Gabriel’s grace.

But we’re getting to a 9x11 parallel in the structure of the episode, but Cas is left behind with Nick rather than Sam, and Sam gets to be out there looking for his brother… And of course Dean within Michael experiences a shattering greater than the Mark of Cain did to him…

-

“Lucifer may have inflicted more damage on your psyche” yeah no shit we were warning you he would have the Hallucifers

Cas does the most terrified slow shoulder touch ever - there’s a real right shoulder wrong shoulder thing going on. Last episode he clasped Jack on the correct (left) shoulder, and this time he tries to touch Nick on the right and nearly gets smote, and then this touch is on the same, as he discerns what’s wrong with Nick, and I get a mirror of 11x11 where Lucifer did the wrong shoulder touch to Dean, and have him the only inkling something was up with Cas, that Dean shrugged off because, ow.

-

Anyway white man has angst. Nick has the Hallucifers and he has to find out who killed his family. He’s got like his entire own TV show premise of nonsense going on here and it’s going to be crammed in between everything else.

Bet you anything real monsters did it

-

“And then what

Dude’s got nothing to live for

we’re so over these murdered wife revenge arcs

-

The old flipperoo of it being terrifying for a monster when 3 scary hunters bust in weapons drawn. The vampire has a terrible apartment and she didn’t even get a new car - it’s like she went from one crappy life to the next and the only thing that changed was she was now a miserable vampire. I’m sympathetic to her for now :’)

-

Oh look how surprising, this side of the story is being 2x03 still - aside from AUBobby snarking that vampires "never do” anything wrong, in the position of one who never learned a grey area because lower Winchester exposure, the vamps are feeding on animal blood, and mourning the loss of their nest. This is another Lenore. Of course we started the episode with them in the morgue finding vampire teeth on seemingly human victims, as in 2x03, and the killer is the deadliest hunter in the universe - the heavily Gordon themed side of Dean which has been symbolised by vampires the whole time from Lenore to Benny…

-

OH this is the girl from the cold open. So I assume she’s going to explain how she got away. We have to assume the cold open was several days ago - long enough for her to lie low, Michael to ditch all the vamps, AND for them to be discovered again and moved to the morgue and then for this branch of TFW to come out here. Which explains that Michael must have already moved on and be ready for his party in the present day, which is a stretch of time enough to form his next plan.

-

“I-if you let me go!” yeah AUBobby lunges at her when he assumes the conversation is over, because he never dealt with this before, but looks over to Sam now, and then Mary does.

We cut away before we find out if Sam decided her fate, so that current silence on the subject may be left ominous or may explain a lot about Sam when we find out whether he had her killed and has turned ruthless, or is still soft Sammy who dealt with Lenore and knows how it goes.

-

Mikey, what are you up to?

-

He’s tapping Dean’s charm but with a hint more of Jensen’s whiskey smoothness in his voice than Dean’s coarseness, so this is legally defined as assault.

This is horrifying. GIVE IT BACK.

I’m calling the police. Michael has made off with Dean’s entire seduction routine to trap this monster, and I am horrified.

Weirder still hearing him just casually called Michael. Brrrr.

Ooh she’s a werewolf. Somehow I hadn’t managed to work that out in the glimpse in the promo and thought she was a new monster type.

I guess Mikey is shopping around.

-

Wow she really has prominent teeth. I wonder if that’s a sexy trait in werewolves.

-

He takes a drink as he menaces towards her - he’s still got that calm drifting through kinda attitude that Michael had even in the AU when he was Christian Keyes, and he’s starting to have fun, which is really really bad.

I don’t think Michael has ever had fun in his life.

He’s like the perfect little kid who does well in all his studies then sneaks off and drowns the family cat in the back of the garden as an outlet.

-

“Now. Summon your master.”

Is this the elusive Werewolf Alpha who survived even season 6 because the show just Could Not Figure Out What To Do With Werewolves until season 9

-

Nick  has an ENDLESS series of white shirts to indicate he’s a sweet innocent dude now

because,  you know we have a hard time dealing with that

-

Nick is ranting like a privileged white man

I mean his family is dead, I just struggle with Nick for obvious reasons

and as soon as his mannerisms cross a line, he loses me again

-

He’s kinda weird with Cas as well because he knows Cas, kinda, and he has to be 100% on board with all the nonsense, so he’s just A Bloke dropped in this life now but casually chatting to an angel. it’s weird. “You know what a cold case is, Castiel?” liike, he knows Cas doesn’t always know stuff but he is also just going off on one.

I think poor Cas has decided since the Nickifer moment that he needs to spend more time actively watching over Nick, and once more is trapped with a ranting annoying man

this is his curse.

-

“But you’re not dead. You have a second chance.”

“you don’t understand”

Ah, teenagers, such a problem :P

but seriously, this is hilariously the third converastion this episode Cas has been in where he directly relates to the very specific weird metaphysical problem that Nick or Jack is going through because there’s literally NOTHING that Cas hasn’t already been through. He might yet make an excellent therapist just because of how many weird torments he’s endured.

-

Cas speaking with fondness of Jimmy :’) Such a feeling of Jimmy being a good man who went to Heaven, and for Cas, raised as an angel like this, being in Heaven with your soulmate is the ultimate happy ending for good devout people - in 4x20 when he’s still in Claire he tells Jimmy he served well and will go to Heaven like it’s a reward, and despite everything he still seems to default to that, especially for the comfort of knowing this about Jimmy of all people, because of how directly responsible Cas is for destroying their lives, and knowing that at least they got this is a WONDERFUL coping mechanism for angels to tell themselves it’s all okay, when they get the correct vessel with the proper permissions and they’re a good and pious person who prayed for it etc etc.

Cas and Lucifer remain the only angels we’ve ever seen actually court their vessel properly, although it’s implied Anael did similar. Most others have hopped right in without securing full and informed consent. Er, not that Lucifer does, but at least he has full and informed bullshit trickery, which, um. Is a thing?

-

Nick how DARE you call Cas a “stone cold bodysnatcher” who’s no better than Lucifer. Jimmy is gone and Cas has had this vessel remade for him like six times since then. It’s the Jimmy Model Vessel mk.VI, as sculpted by God or the Empty.

-

*sobs about Cas saying what happened to Jimmy was his greatest regret*

SUCH GOOD CAS STUFF this episode

-

The alpha werewolf is a white guy in a suit, surprisingly.

Michael, also a white guy in a suit, sits opposite him, and they’re pretentious about their cognac.

-

“She thinks you’re a god” that’s the second time that’s happened. He kinda liked it when it was applied directly to him but not an accusation of BEING Chuck, just that that’s how he comes across.

-

Oh good he’s just the leader of the pack, not the Alpha.

Still wanna know who that is

-

His sales pitch is about their purity in wanting to kill to eat to live once again. I find it hard to believe a werewolf with snooty opinions about alcohol who wears a suit like that doesn’t have some human sins, but it seems that Michael is judging them by their monstrousness first, and waving aside their other habits in favour of the big picture of how they live their lives.

-

“Fully tested” you fucking liar

He’s talking around the truth… It’s fascinating watching him threading the line of judging people for sinners without falling into that himself.

-

I do wonder how he knows about wine unless his previous vessel did… or he’s taking from Dean’s pop culture and deadpan bullshitting it. Sorry, I’m still stuck on that detail. Character stuff always entertains me so much more than plot :P

-

“Believe me, it’s an absurd dream” He’s passively observed at least like 3 attempts to enslave the human race for food just in the last few years. He knows.

Mikey, you can’t go around promising that, they know it doesn’t work. Dick Roman couldn’t pull it off, and you don’t have his business acumen.

-

“Why be the huntED when you can be the huntER”

ANTI DEAN ANTI DEAN ANTI DEAN AAAAAH turning over EVERYTHING he works for

UUUUGH

-

Okay, Jack’s wandered off and found his grandparents without a single warning and I am WOUNDED.

-

They seriously need to put more warning in for these things because ow ow ow ow ow

-

Oh my gooood he’s named after Kelly’s daaad

-

Look at these nice grandparents

-

“So you were like her intern” oh ne the intern jokes of last summer have come around and stabbed me

I repent

-

Oh NO nerdy little Kelly

this is awful

where is this episode coming from? I can’t believe someone’s managed to wrangle Buckleming into doing good stuff with everything so this is actually emotionally well-told

this is probably their best episode yet and i’m half an hour in

-

“We have a grandson!”

This is emotionally mauling me like an angry bear

-

“Jack kind of looks like her!”

*Jack attempts to speak from a lump the size of a planet in his throat*

*Lizzy types from within the bear’s mouth, as it tries to stuff my down ITS throat*

-

NOUGAT GOT HIS HUG

-

Sam spared the vampire girl!!! YAY

-

She’s called Lydia. You assholes literally used that name before for the Amazon Dean hooked up with

-

I can’t believe Michael took the time to change his suit. He has a suit for business and a suit for meetings.

-

“the hunters” Oh that’s cold. Dean, can you hear how he dismisses your FAMILY?

-

Oh nooo he metatroned her. This was a traaaaaaap and she was bait

-

Aww Lydia :(

-

He smites like Lucifer killed demons with his mind

it’s so scary

-

How can Cas be mad at Jack I just nearly cried at a Buckleming episode

anyway he and Jack are having the equivalent I am your dad and I  set curfew, vs I am a grown up I can go out when I want argument for his teen son he’s unfortunately not engaged with much.

-

“the only real family I have left”

Cas gets SO PISSED

I AM YOUR DAD, SON

-

But he pushes it down and asks if it helped because Cas is good and nice and loves Jack

-

Once Jack reveals that he looked like the weirdly photoshopped Kelly on a horse (oof) Cas gets mauled by the same Feels Bear and relents completely because he’s legally not allowed to cry but he wants to

-

“I suppose there are worse ways to be human than to be kind,” he says as speight exploits the fuck out of the bunker set, having them sit either side of the door between war and home, tables in the centre, them on the pillars flanking it. It’s a wonderful image. I’d go into it more but I suddenly think I have no time at all

-

“So they’re going to kill him,” lil Hamlet of Nougat says all firmly, re: Michael

Cas switches gears from “this precious child” to “uuuh” immediately

-

“And if he doesn’t leave?”

I can see Cas being that meme where everything is an action blur around his face to express deep horror as Jack keeps prodding worst case murdering Dean scenarios

-

Listen, when this little ball of damp feathers you call your son is joining in with the entire universe challenging you if you have the guts to see Dean killed for the greater good, you have a problem that EVERYONE can see

-

“Dean doesn’t matter!”

*shock lines intensify*

“You’re all so focused on trying to save Dean”

Yeah, he does the same for all of you.

This is the pier conversation from 11x14, but 1000x more intense.

-

Cas is like “?????????????? HOW DARE?”

-

Cas can not comprehend a world where Dean dies, but our lil Shakespearean hero is determined that it has to  happen because he WILL kill Michael, it’s been put on his shoulders and he WILL DO IT DAMMIT.

(later)

-

Cas did not have this in the parenting books

-

“Do you think he’d want it any other way?”

“no but i love him”

-

I can not BELIEVE Jack got a flounce off stage left and Cas is the one left shook

damn, kids are hard

-

Nick has also wandered off to meet some relatives.

Cas is the worst at keeping his chickens in the coop

what was he doing

lying on Dean’s bed sniffing the pillow

-

Oh dear, but it’s the neighbour who as this conversation goes on I’m starting to assume was the one who killed his family.

Is he gonna go all Lucifer on this guy?

-

Uhoh, bulletproof werewolves

man I am gonna miss my bus if anything else happens

-

Mary saves AUBobby <3

-

Hi Deanchael, come to torment this poor family

You know you coulda brought Cas because he knew you were here the whole time anyway

-

DEAN! HI!

That was a really cool move Dean.

“Sammy”

<3

-

“It’s me”

Unless it’s NOT

-

“He just left”

“why”

“i don’t know. I don’t know!”

me too bud

-

Hey look Nick killed the guy with a hammer

What a surprise

-

Welp now I have to take my 3rd choice for bus to yoga but I finished and now I will be gone all weekend byeee love you yell about this later <3


	3. 14x03

Just finished watching and said, out loud and to no one: “Awww Jack.”

(This is not a spoiler, he’s just so sweet.)

-

Hallo, I am watching from bed despite having 3rd hand inherited a 2nd monitor over the weekend so theoretically my watching experience would be back to giant comfortable side-typing glory.

But comfy.

Easily accessible stuffed toys because Bobo Fucking Berens in Dabb era has made me cry more at this dumb show in the last couple of years than I cried in the previous ten.

Expectations: it’s our Dean episode to make up for no Dean until now, and also Jody is there to see Sam’s beard, and also Cas continues to be party!Cas, and Jack’s shirts get darker and darker.

-

Side note: I think I was rushing out the door before I could talk about our lil Nougat of Denmark properly last episode where he was all, so we’re killing my uncle then, and Cas was all D: D: D: D: D: who raised you. (Dean. Dean did. In this regard the boy is his father’s son.) This, of course, is another Shakespearean irony than is being returned to Dean via Jack.

The point of this focus is very much to show Jack vs Cas mindsets on it when we’re getting Dean returned to us, and I assume considerably more nuance is being added to the story. But for now, Jack being ready to kill his father to kill his uncle because his father was ready to kill him to kill the ghosts he saw of his enemies in Jack is more than enough of a pile of tragedy level angst to be working with.

I just need it to be clear that as far as I’m concerned, Jack is working in a completely different genre from EVERYONE ELSE around him, and the fact that it’s the protagonist of a tragedy is fairly alarming, as it’s a mindset that Sam, Dean and Cas have hurdled over since season 5/6 and though Dean still assumes he’ll die bloody, he is at least capable of dreaming of a happy ending, and a lessening of the angst load has allowed that. Their personal stakes in the story are dwindling, in a sense, while Jack has showed up with like FOUR FATHERS and an evil uncle, which is so much potential family angst Shakey would have exploded. “Wait you can just addeth extra fathers thence addeth extra angst!?!?”

Yes my dude, yes.

-

*hits play* *Sam ruggedly cocks his pistol* You’re stealing this whole shtick from Dean and I think it is time for the angst that you were the one dramatically cocking a gun and being the yes reductive heteronormative blah blah penis of the dynamic while Dean was not there to do it.

-

Oh no we immediately start with more Jack angst recap and aside from everything I just said I remembered that Bobo personally murdered me in 13x03 with the Jack n Sam stuff and here we are a year later.

Mr Stark I don’t feel so good

-

THE BEARD EXCHANGE IS LITERALLY THE OPENING SCENE. BOBO I LOVE YOU. Thank you for breaking the tension and immediately drawing attention to how Sam has been busy and miserable. I think 14x01 set up well that every time he even had a moment to sigh his phone would ring again, and hence the beard appears as Sam eskews personal grooming and comfort in exchange for finding his brother. Jody is gonna draw attention to it at some point too because we have the promo shot of her nice peach fuzz-ing him, and I sincerely hope this is bookends to the episode and the next episode Sam is clean shaven with no comment except Jody prodded him in the face, and let me tell you only Bobo has me fantasising about the narrative framing of an episode like this.

God i’m a nerd

Anyway more seriously, this exchange coming out of the blue has a clear motive: Dean is up and about, still so freshly de-Michaeled he’s in a waistcoat (and LORDY the only other scene he was in a waistcoat? 7x12’s ending scene where Sam turns into such a moron in Jody’s presence he’s waving blushily at the door still AFTER SHE HAS GONE). Complaining about not being able to eat and sleep might be a sense of hyperbole to catch given the lack of elapsed time, but it also warns us that this might be how Dean reacts to being un-Michaeled. Or would he not, given he’s up and about and snarking like his old self? How damaged will he be and how much can he repress into snark? He is playing off the very idea that this experience will have been damaging to his psyche and of course Michael did a ton of stuff which was expressly tuned to BE damaging to his psyche, then punched a mirror and shattered Dean’s reflection for extra emphasis.

So all this question of how Dean is doing is loaded into the very opening line before he’s even taken off his waistcoat, or of course, had enough time to truly eat/sleep/develop massive tells of the psychological trauma he may or may not have taken.

Obviously the show wouldn’t be the show if he were fine, so I’m taking it as a question posed.

Then of course it slides into Bro Banter to prove it’s Dean, remind us JUST how much we missed this snarky genre savvy fucker, and to make Sammy smile.

-

Also we’re mocking Jared for being friends with that one Duck Dynasty guy who Jared’s fans insist is the least awful of the bunch and also who you end up hanging out with when you’re most embedded in the Texan stardom scene rather than living in Hollywood or whatever.

(God imagine being famous and from Atlanta and sticking true to your roots and you end up with the Queer Eye guyses as your BFFs instead)

-

Listen Bobo showed his socialist party membership card on twitter, he has no fucks to give about waving his politics around and I love him.

-

“If you’re going to ask if I’m okay, you don’t have to” (I am making fun of your beard, what more do I have to give you, bro?)

Buddy, I have been watching your face for over a decade and you have the sad tired pink eyelids of a Dean who is both tired and miserable.

-

Oh NO Dean walks into the main room expecting his comfy quiet library and war room full of 3 trusted family faces, and finds the bustle of Boss Sam’s operation. The upcoming noise of these people before he turns the corner is an immediate warning that we should have expected this as dramatic irony for Dean’s comfort levels from the start, and now he’s back, well.

Panicked eyes.

He needs quiet recovery with his peeps, not alarming sudden change. A rug pull immediately after possession is a terrible thing to deal with. I’ve been wondering if this is a full reverse of season 6 for Dean - from the trustability of the hunter compound to the fact he lives in it, to the Samuel running it. But the effect is the same. Dean comes back from quiet time off to a change he can’t handle and Sam in a new position in a family/hunter heirarchy. In this case, not Samuel’s soulless goon, but a fully bearded Boss Sam King Of Hell Sir who Runs Shit competently in a way we the viewer trust implictly as Sam having Done Well, and also that the AU peeps might be a bit rough or untrained in some ways but 100% reliable in that they really do have no ulterior motive and every reason to think of Sam as an AU Moses who popped up and walked them to another land of safety and comfort.

-

Like, Dean, welcome back, you have Hamlet, Moses and Mobby to deal with. Cas seems to be the same as you left him, though. If somehow, impossibly, squintier.

-

“Right, Chief told us”

GOD I MISSED JENSEN’S MICRO EXPRESSIONS

You know how Michael sucks? No micro expressions. Guy doesn’t have an anxious bone in his body.

This little bundle of neuroses I have chosen to love is full on having a meltdown on the other hand.

-

“Dean? Is it really you?”   
“Hey kid”

HUG. THE. BOY.

I suppose this is better than last year when he had a hug from a shapeshifter and had to wait to episode 6 for a hug from his father, but REALLY this season has been tormenting me with how bad Jack feels and even a hug from his gramgram isn’t enough to satisfy how he should have been hugged by Sam, Cas and now Dean already this season.

We’re only on epiode 3 and he’s already got more hugs than he had this point last year. Deep  breaths, Lizzy

-

Children need a lot of cuddles to affect their development into sensitive people okay? Dean got a lot of hugs up to age 4 and Sam basically did not, and he’s an awkward moose and Dean is snuggly. I want Nougat to have the same development into a sensitive lad because he has EIGHTEEN FUCKING PARENTS AND NONE OF THEM HUG HIM

-

CAS HEARD ‘DEAN’ FROM ACROSS THE BUNKER, ARRIVES IN A BLUR

-

GOOD NOUGAT, HUG DEAN.

But like, dude, Cas just showed up at a run and made the gooiest eyes at Dean who made them back, and now you’re officially cockblocking, so naff off, kid

-

I watched with prayer hands and Cas just got gooier and Dean got sulky he didn’t get a Cas hug and this is officially the worst. Bobo, you let me down, my guy.

-

I mean no, Cas’s gooey eyes were

…

Cas doesn’t do gooey eyes. He squints. Squintily.

Who is this guy

-

Lol Mobby aren’t in the episode because they stayed back to clean up - Sam gets stammery to Jack. Is he scared to imply they’re maybe banging because he finds it weird but everyone else present is an even worse audience to announce this to for one reason or another (historically coped much better with the concept of dad sex when discovering adam and also didn’t drive the car off the road into a ditch on finding out mary banged ketch), or is he trying to protect Jack from the concept of Michael leaving a pile o dead bodies for one reason or another, knowing Michael is his rage button?

-

He was the one who dealt with Jack trying to stay back in the AU to fight Mikey instead of just coming home.

-

“Speaking of clean up, I need a shower” *gestures vaguely* *Cas opens his mouth like why did I have a reaction image here? Do you want -* *closes mouth* *dean leaves*

Guys. You fucking suck. Go take a shower together and work things out.

-

“Still okay, I promise” *bisexual finger guns at Cas*

cut to: Cas squinting after Dean like “is he implying something”

“…”

“I really feel like he was trying to communicate something to me”

“…”

“I have no idea what Dean just hinted loudly to me twice in short succession and now that he has gone to shower I guess I will never know what he was attempting to communicate to me”

-

“Where’s Nick?”  
“Hopefully not in this episode. Let’s just say he needs some time because he’s in a dark place and hope that’s ALL we have to say about him”

-

Oh no. “Sam. Dean. How is he really?”

Cas has a one track mind.

But then we get the shot of Dean opening his door and they’re still talking about him over the top of it, but it’s that same shadowed shot of himself silhouetted in the doorway, the inner darkness represented by his room… Sam went into his and stripped himself of the tools in his pocket but before he could sleep, Jo called and set them all off again with the next lead.

Now Dean opens his door and turns on the light so we can see his inner self in a moment of peace and privacy, but essentially with a voice over about how he’s super not okay.

-

Just how we left it. You can’t even tell that for the last 2 episodes/3 weeks Cas has been coming in and snuggling your pillow every time he’s not in a scene because where the fuck was he inbetween scenes in 14x02

-

God I have missed lingering shots of Dean’s room, equating his inner space to his inner feelings. *paws lovingly at the shot* Dean’s room all tidy and orderly and as he left it, yet feeling somehow very very empty and off-kilter in an unfamiliar way because he hasn’t been here for so long.

-

It was all serious then guitar music started playing as Dean started stripping

and look

I saw the promo pics

you saw the promo pics

some person in the audience is like… why are we lingering on Dean getting undressed alone in his room while guitar music kicks up?

-

Is this what all that winking and finger gun action was about?

-

(Dean didn’t wink but I took a lil break to chat with Mittens and the moment has evolved into him gurning at the door for like a minute trying to remind Cas that this means he joins him in the shower in 5)

-

“Fuck this shirt in particular”

I still think it was the audacity of wearing a bow tie that dragged Dean to the surface last episode

-

I love how Dean changes from this plain white t-shirt which is completely clean and shiny, into his normal dark dark brown shirt between scenes. I hope he got to shower. Whatever happened, this scar could have said “Ha ha ha I’m behind you”, and he would have finished stripping down right to the skivvies then started fresh with his own boxerbriefs before freaking out and rushing to show the others.

-

But yeah, he’s PISSED and embarrassed about Michael. You don’t throw a guy’s shirt on the floor like that unless you feel SERIOUSLY used, and here we end up with a creepy sort of STD metaphor, complete with the visual similarity to the clap: [https://www.giantmicrobes.com/uk/products/clap.html](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.giantmicrobes.com%2Fuk%2Fproducts%2Fclap.html&t=NmZjZmIwNjdlYTZjOGExNTQzYWUxOTAwOGRiZGU5M2JkNDlhOWFmZCxFUVJJbk5POQ%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F179452144663%2F14x03-watching-notes-just-finished-watching-and&m=1)

Bad fling, Dean?

-

Poker!witch gave Sam the clap in the episode which was totally not a metaphor about Sam getting the clap then beating poker!witch at his own game like nearly 20 episodes before he was possessed by Lucifer then beat him at his own game.

-

“Do the whole vulcan mind meld thing” Listen, James T Kirk, you can’t just MAKE yourself one of the most iconic slash pairings of all time by comparing - wait

wait a minute

*Checks slash history books and sees them as a dictionary definition or two*

-

Anyway.

-

Dean’s so eager for Cas to jump into his head. Just, like. Again. We all said it but immediately after that shirt throw? It REALLY emphasises that Dean sees Cas in this transcendant way to being used by an angel that got in his head. And left an STD mark on his arm. He can just immediately think, well, that sucked. But here’s MY angel and I’m just gonna rev myself up and present my head for inspection and this isn’t even a thing I’m concerned about. Hit me, big guy.

-

Oh come the fuck on Bobo.

I didn’t have time to hit pause to have a heart attack about Cas putting his hand over The Scar, the one on the wrong shoulder, to get a clearer reception, because there’s a HISTORY in scars, okay? They leave a mark and to the discerning poker and prodder like Cas that history can be read in the mark… And Cas sees… Michael being stabbed by a spear. Not just, like. Seeing Michael being stabbed by a spear, mind you. He sees it in a Bobo episode in a way wildly reminiscent of Patience seeing Claire/Kaia getting stabbed by a VERY SIMILAR LOOKING SPEAR and getting her Wayward introduction that way, when the whole Dreamhunter thing ended up being a massive Destiel parallel and Kaia getting stabbed already mirrored CAS getting stabbed by a spear (Michael’s, natch) in 12x12, never mind the other stuff.

So Bobo has just built up a Destiel Dreamhunter sandwich, with Destiel nonsense either side, complete with bonus shoulder scar imagery, and a nice gooey dreamhunter centre.

Bobo, if you hadn’t noticed, is really really really really reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaally bitter he isn’t off writing Wayward Sisters and hanging with his girls.

There’s still a bunch of stuff to add up here, about why and who and how it all connects, which would involve dragging in these other spear-y episodes to assemble the full picture, so I’m just gonna hit play now I’m recovered from the shock :P

-

Oh dude it was a hooded figure who even LOOKED like bad Kaia and tbh at this point I’d say maybe even was?

Like, how many pronged spears are out there anyway and Jody’s dealing with it so is it local? Did Michael pop up on Kaia like hey so you and I are both from alternate universes, what do you wa - OW FUCK JESUS FUKKIN CHRIST -

-

“Dean, who was that?”

Dean recognised her, and Cas was mind-melded enough with him to know that Dean did… Good grief I can not handle Dean and Cas existing on an emotional plane.

It’s enough to mean they’re the ones who call Jody with a tip off for HER rather than months of them asking her to help THEM.

-

Introducing us back to the Wayward world - South Dakota mug, and a text that Claire is a little angel who has been training her gals and even did the laundry.

I’m so happy

-

Eyebrow raise

God, Kim Rhodes is the most beautiful woman on the whole show and that’s saying something considering, like. Ruthie. Lisa Berry. Something about the way she uses her face is so full of intelligence and humour that I am HELPLESS in her presence

-

God damn I want that fabled Girls’ Night episode. Billie comes along too on a night off.

-

Rowena calls her up for chats sometimes these days, they’re actually really good pals.

-

Sam you fucking moron you can’t even finish a sentence in her presence. Just slap Dean on his WOUNDED arm and throw the ball to him.

-

Everyone leaning over the phone… This is the closest Cas has ever come to Jody.

“Jody, that’s the good news.”

Jody recognises that gravelly voice and snaps to holyshitanangel attention. “What’s up?”

The implicit thing here is that Cas and Jody know each others’ voices and are on at least chatting acquaintance. I would like to think they’re invited over for beer at the same time but we have no proof………………… yet. This is Bobo on a “fuck you” rampage so I’m just, like, gonna wait see.

-

Bad Kaia has been going around ripping heads off things. DAMN, GIRL.

-

Considering the placement of the pronging was ~random~, in the sense that she can meat fork you anywhere, that means the placement of it on the meat of Dean’s arm where the handprint once was on the other is even MORE significant in a metaphorical sense, of writing about “the scar” in the way of giving it a mystical property tied into the wider framework of all these relationships and events at once. The amount piled onto a simple stabbing is unbelievable, and the use of the scar as the vector for all this is definitely the byline of the episode given the title and all. It’s brought Kaia back to us, given Jody the clue she needs.

And more dramatic irony that Claire was just asking to help, and Jody was like DEFINITELY HUMAN, SO ALL MINE. HAHAHA. And now we know, no, it’s not all “human”, it’s bad!Kaia and that makes her CLAIRE’S.

-

I keep stopping to seal clap

-

it’s 7:20am

-

Cas is packing up to leave with them!!!

And Jack looms blurrily into the background in his darkest t-shirt yet. And he’s been RAPIDLY cycling through them.

In a sense this is good laundry practice, in order that you have a full load of lights followed by a full load of darks.

Metaphorically, however, this is BAD.

Jack sounds pissed they’re all wearing jackets and packing bags, and he’s wandering around in an over-sized dark grey t-shirt (one of Dean’s? AUBobby’s? It doesn’t look like his standard fare which fits his body, this makes him look SMOL), with no idea we were off to kill the wizard.

Let’s be charitable and say he wants to meet Jody and hang out with Kaia again.

But more likely Bobo is once again messing with Jack’s inherent darkness in his presentation, especially as right now, once again while Jack is being The Sweetest Little Cookie, meeting his grandparents for ice tea and looking through the family photo album with misty eyes, he is ALSO Prince Nougat of Denmark and this is causing some serious darkness slippage because, well, revenge. Revenge is bad, kiddo. Don’t need a ghost of your dead father (hey Dean’s back) to tell you that.

The accusatory tone is enough to warn us that Jack’s not doing so well and I’m going to assume drags Cas away from a mission with Dean followed by cooldown eating pizza and watching flicks with the girls.

-

“Kaia’s killer is in Sioux Falls” Buddy.  
“He, she or it can hurt Michael” BUDDY.

I suppose they’re bringing Cas because Bad Kaia kicked their asses and they assume Cas is the same height as her pet/metaphor for Kaia’s inner fucked-up-ness so he can probably fight it??

-

“Michael’s my enemy too! I fought him. For MONTHS.” JACK sweetie. You can’t just go around like, having an enemy list. And comparing it with your collective fathers’ list.

The line about bringing Kaia into it and being responsible for what happened to her is good, though. Jack’s got a social consciousness and that is lovely because he keeps doubting his goodness but when it comes down to it he wants to meet his grandparents and feels bad that Kaia got dragged into things and killed.

Of course, not realising this is Bad Kaia, they’re all off to get MORE revenge on that thing that killed her.

-

Aw, Dean, no, don’t point out how smol he is. He’s wearing a huge baggy shirt to emphasise it already.

“I didn’t - I didn’t MEAN to be a dick” Whoops. Well, you were. You also missed the part where Jack went from smol precious child to angsty teen.

Fun fact: Hamlet was supposed to be like 18 or whatever, but because a famous actor wanted the lead role but was like, idk, 50, Shakey bumped up Hamlet’s age a lil so he could get away with it, making him more of, like, a giant manbaby who is still functionally a teen in all ways except he keeps getting portrayed by middle aged men.

So, of course, we have our one and a half year old Nougat who is a 29 year old actor now getting into his terrible teens, and if that isn’t the funnest nugget of trivia…

… then you are not as much of a nerd as I am about irony, coincidence, and neat overlaps of thingies.

Point is: get me a version of Hamlet where the other expected actors are adults of course, but Horatio and Hammy and his squad are dumb teens.

-

Lol Bobo just randomly introduces a cool lady hunter who is dragging a random victim of a hex down into the bunker to be healed by an angel. That poor girl is going to have a story to tell.

A lot just happened in a few seconds but at least Jack, who has stormed off for his nth teenage sulk of the season, now has a Cas trapped in the Bunker with him.

Dean n Sam gonna get their asses kicked by Bad Kaia

honestly is this just a ploy not to keep Cas where Jack is, but to keep Misha away from stunt fighting?

Anyway Dean communicates most of the above to Cas silently, and tells him that he should stay with Jack and also heal this girl and they have the most married eye conversation about what  needs to be done, which is wonderful that they’ve been having these silent conversations all Dabb era but this is definitely the wordiest so far. I mean one of their more recent was just “Dean I can hear that cowboy music in your head” “what cowboy music?”

-

DEAN DOESN’T EVEN LOOK THRILLED TO BE DRIVING BABY AGAIN.

Sam mostly looks concerned he’s hitting 80mph

I don’t know anything about American speed limits but this is an alarming speed to me because in the UK 70 is usually like, the Most, and we don’t have enough long straight roads that when there’s no speed limit it’s ever really recommended to go super fast because you will flip your car and die because all our roads are one and a half car length wide and extremely wiggly. And our motorways are congested enough you’re more likely to be in a traffic jam than top speed anyway :P

-

I love that Dean measures people by their favourite Spice Girl. Hey Dean the 90s called, they want their pop culture relevance back.

You gay icon you.

(I’m reminded of 12x07 and Bobo and a similar conversation where Dean listed off all his manly manly historical faves)

-

Dean thinks Cas can handle it back home :’)

-

“Something huge happened and you won’t really talk about it!”

Okay Sam, he’s traumatised and that’s surface text.

You do realise the entire massive subtext is his repression and yet another metaphor for some huge queer experience and that this is the same conversation as 10x04 when he was grumbling into his chin about being embarrassed about what he did with Crowley? You realise that right?

Stop poking him about it, he’ll talk when he’s ready to open up. In the mean time he’s feeling used and ashamed that this fling didn’t go as planned after the whole first flirtation with waving his wings around and killing Lucifer where it all seemed fun to embrace his ~true self~ and have a crack at being a Flaming Michael Sword.

-

Also of course, we might just take him on his word that he really does NOT remember most of everything that happened because if he was truly repressing that much he wouldn’t have been so gung ho for Cas to read his mind earlier but this mood pre-dates that so even if he remembered everything when Cas poked his brain, which seems unlikely as Cas saw it too, the wider sulk about his Clap Scar is more than just this.

-

It’s a common experience, though, that Dean is repressed and moody, and Sam barrels in there trying to make him talk about it before he’s ready, so the pressing is in character, regardless, that Sam doesn’t trust that Dean is telling the whole truth and that there’s some huge secret he’s holding back.

The best part of queer subtext is that whether there is one or not it works - if there isn’t, it’s a metaphor for the obvious. If there is, same as above but the metaphor is concretely attached to whatever Dean is not telling Sam, and that in turn then becomes a part of the queer subtext, offered up on a platter to tell us more about how Dean is handling his post-possession shame of being, essentially, roofied after thinking he’d agreed to a consensual fling with a dude on his terms of entry and no strings attached, no walk of shame like he did when he was undressing earlier.

-

Poor guy can not catch a break. Shoulda hooked up with Aaron when you had the chance so your first time having a dude in you wasn’t such a big deal, but just a nice booty call to keep in your phonebook. Now it’s all Crowley this, Michael that…

-

“We need to deal with it.”  
“Okay, I’m literally going EIGHTY to deal with it”

Dean, that’s.

that’s not therapy

“How can I be running from something when I’m RACING towards it”  
“I don’t know, it’s kinda your thing”

Sammy boy you have been trapped in the same car as Dean for way too long. Your analysis is getting deep. Deep deep cuts. Leave him alone.

-

I mean this is a guy who dealt with a gay panic by hooking up with Crowley and singing karaoke for him so.

-

“I  just *need* you to talk to me. Slow down.”

Oh SAM you said a good and interesting combo of words there. Dean, go 70 instead of 80, give us some time to feel this out because I’ve been FREAKED and, for you, you got a time skip but I lived it all real time and it SUCKED, and I’m hurt too by this. Reminder: our family does not do well with LOSING each other, and this is every conversation we’ve ever had post-thinking that happened, and I did things responsibly and grew a beard and became Boss of a bunch of peeps and also King of Hell but we’ll talk about that later… Like, slow down. I have my issues too. There’s 2 of us in this car and you can’t go 80 and time skip to the end of this conversation either. Not when I have 3 weeks of angst packed into it.

-

Also: classic Sam projection. Trying to get Dean to open up because HE has pain he wants to air, instead of just bringing up how he felt, he tries to get Dean to open up, and when this continues, as always, not to be how Dean deals with things, Sam gets upset because it never gives him the opening to talk about his shit until it’s an argument…

You could have just started the convo, sorry about the beard, I really mean it when I say I haven’t had a moment to myself for 3 weeks, it’s been HELL and funny I should mention Hell, er, did you know you can kinda just declare yourself king these days… heh

-

At least he’s using racing metaphors about wanting to catch up and also, like, catch up

Dean responds to the sport metaphors

-

Dean is like nah call Jody we’re almost there. I skipped ahead.

-

Look, I’m delivering you to your boo, what more do you want?

Jody smiles at the sight of them in a way which is almost as revolting as Cas smiling at seeing Dean again

-

Hugs!

Send Jody to the Bunker to HUG OUR BOY

-

“How’d you do it?”  
“What, me vs some assbag archangel? Who would you pick?”  
“You, every time.”

And this, guys, is how Jody is never, ever patched into their angst, because they present a narrative where Dean just kinda chucked off Mikey and sent him packing and it’s all cool and he’s a hero.

Jody has at multiple points threatened to beat Dean into submission in order to hear a true version of how he’s doing and he has so far not given in and sat at her kitchen table with a box of tissues to sob through his crap, but I hold out eternal hope like the fool I am.

Anyway it’s also telling RIGHT AFTER that last conversation where Sam was probing Dean so intensely, that this is the version of “I’m fine” that Dean is going with, and even though Sam KNOWS there’s more to it, this is the wall Dean is projecting, even to him. Even when he knows Dean is freaked by it and doesn’t know all the details.

-

Jody goes up like 18 pitches “Heeey I liiIIIiiike it!” she squeaks, forcefully tweaking Sam’s beard because “nice peach fuzz” is too understated both for Jody and the volume of facial hair Sam has produced without comment until Dean came back and Jody showed up.

-

Dean has never been so offended in his life

-

*Jody continues giggling to herself while Sam desperately looks for a normal conversation*

-

AHAHA “I haven’t been home since I talked to her……….. I may be avoiding her”

Yeaaaah, bringing up that it’s not just a normal human beheading and weird stab mark, but ALSO a KAIA-RELATED ONE maaay be… too much.

-

i’m going to be honest I’ve been so thrilled about everything I forgot to check what cast is flashing up on the screen

-

Anyway there is very much a subtext to Jody’s avoidance of telling Claire what’s going on that she knows how much she loved Kaia and how much of an issue this is - even if it’s gonna be for revenge, because they don’t know it’s Bad Kaia - this is something where Claire’s feelings make a MESS.

-

Bobo gets in Sam’s serial killer thing, Dean is staring into the void like am I still even here or am I in hell. Is this a hell that Michael conjured. Mikey. Hey. Mikey. I figured it out. We’re done here. Let’s go back to regular torture. Michael. This is the bad place. Michael.

-

Dean stomps off into the woods because waiting for daybreak means being stuck in the same room as Jody and Sam flirting for a few hours.

-

Jody firmly pokes Sam in the chest with a map.

-

Sam.

-

A raven caws in the background, and Jack is wearing layers, the darkest shirt yet, a thick corduroy jacket in the style of early Sam, and is packing a bag.

-

He wrote a note and his handwriting is as disgustingly adorable as I thought it might be.

Alex wrote “Jack” with a cutesy backwards K in an autograph for someone who requested it at a con and I thought that was a cute detail but not how Jack would write and the real story - and I assume like with others they made him write it in character - is much more nuanced. His letters are competently shaped like he knows exactly how they should be, but shakily written, like he’s not used to holding a pen, because, well, he isn’t. He’s not developed the muscle memory for it, just as he hasn’t for fighting and all the other stuff, because in may ways he IS still a smol toddler with no life skills. His capital letters are huge and precise, like he knows he has to write them big, but disproportionate - putting so much emphasis on the titles of the people around him, the capital letters a metaphor for their influence on him. There’s something clearly unconfident about writing and yet for all that obviously written by someone intelligent enough not to make basic errors of backwards letters and other things. He knows exactly how he is SUPPOSED to do it, but the execution is shakey, and disproportionate and generally looks unschooled and painfully revealing of his entire state of being.

-

Is this the scene where Bobo said out loud to an empty room, awww Jack.

-

I’ve been dreading that since the hiatus.

Maybe I should dig up that post and use it as the title for this one.

-

Triss is gonna die, Jack stopped by the stairs up out the Bunker in the war room, heard and saw Cas moving around, then in a fit of conscience or missing him already or something, stopped by to open the door and look in.

They have DEFINITELY expanded the Bunker set, in the sense that they’ve attached extra rooms to it or Wanek has sat down and made some parts more standardised, because they’ve shown off the corridor connections in every episode so far, and in this one we’re seeing a never-seen-before connection which actually explains what is behind that window and how it fits. I mean, I’m pretty sure we’ve seen this particular room a few times, window and all, but never actual connections which show connected sets, so much as scenes starting or stopping there with no transition.

-

“She’s been enchanted”  
“Like sleeping beauty” Jack says with awe  
“Awwwwwwwwwww” Lizzy says with awww

I honestly can’t tell which moment Bobo said “Aw Jack” out loud about because we’re getting such a series of them

-

Anyway, Hamlet, the great procrastinator, is distracted away from his mission to kill his uncle.

Not sure about the overlap of hearing things from the other side of a wall but I mean at least he’s not going around stabbing people so

-

Jack also seeing all the important work they do for other people, even randos, and Cas getting involved in huntery business, distracted from emotionally nurturing him because of sleeping beauty there, and phoning rowena, doing the work to unknot a spell…

If we get Cas doing spellwork I’m gonna die, it’s been Too Long.

-

Cas [squinting]: “Are you going somewhere?”  
Sleeping Beauty: “ooooww”  
Jack: “No.”

Hon, that was so suspicious you are lucky this is Cas and not one of your other dads.

But. Aww Jack to an empty room.

-

“If I get a vote I’m team stick together” Jody remembers 9x19

Also Sam remembers bad!Kaia kicking their butts. They’re on her natural territory

she is the Predator.

-

Sam keeps LOOKING at Jodio.

Look, I just

Cas keeps looking at Dean, Dean keeps looking at Cas

Jam won’t stop looking at each other

-

That head is a Warning.

Come no further, mortals

-

I think Bad Kaia lives here

-

Vampires.

they really need to figure out how to biologically identify them except for teeth because they really come up against a lot of dead ones

-

Oh

“I brought tissue samples home, Alex ran them underneath the microscope”

Look, girls supporting girls, I knew what they needed to do before they did it lol

-

Dean: I was stabbed here

-

YAY I went frame by frame before the reveal and that is Kaia’s face in there, the hood less spooky than before and more open to reveal her

-

Dean: bout to be stabbed here again

-

Dean finally has the moves to take on Bad Kaia after a season or two with the new stunt guy

but then her hood falls back and he’s STUNNED

-

Now everyone is stunned

-

I think they’ve been using the Wayward Sisters Bad Place soundtrack for this but I’d have to check

the music is so very different and I’m not good at music ear thing

-

Cas: *eye twitches violently*  
Me: Cas why are you having trouble with this line  
Cas: “… marked……………….. 'gross stuff’”

Cas, internally: Why did I marry into this family

-

Future MoLHunter 100 years later: “Man, this place is sweet, but the filing system is balls to the walls.”  
Other Future MoLHunter: “Babe, you did not read the Winchester Gospels before your initiation?”  
F MoLHunter: “There is a drawer here marked 'hands of god’ and the only thing in there is a pair of chopsticks and a ladel”  
OF MoL Hunter: Okay I will give you that.  
-

Me out loud to an empty room: aww Jack

He’s so concerned about Sleeping Beauty, and he can’t do anything about it but he’s curious.

Maybe he CAN fix her and this is how he gets a lil power back.

I hope so because awww Jack being so concerned about her.

This is a Good Procrastination From Revenge

Hamlet, take fucking notes

-

“Is that your dad?”  
“One of them, yes.” Aw Jack

Aw Bobo

Jack’s flipping around on family - he’s accused them of talking about nick/Lucifer as his father, he’s disowned everyone but grampa and grammy Kline, and now he’s fondly thinking of his three hero dads

He’s really struggling to work out his place and what sort of family set up he belongs to and to be fair, he has so many fucking options and all of them are somewhat disastrous or tragic, so he’s 100% in his right to be fuckin confused.

On the other hand Sleepy Beauty has no context so she’s gonna assume Cas is gay married with a kid Jack’s age and that’s like, not untrue.

-

“My mom… but she probably hates me”  
“Why?” Jack says, horrified at the entire concept that a mom could hate a child, because, well, Kelly’s love was COSMIC for him  
“because I left,” she anvils

-

“I was sick of being treated like a kid, and i thought I could make it on my own” Oh boy. She’s just expositioning how Jack feels and immediately telling him if he leaves he’ll fall in with a witch, who curses her with an AGING spell which will make her old before her time.

I feel like there is probably… a metaphor……….. in here……………

-

Also a reverse of Dean’s aged down curse, because the girl and her other victims were hansel and greteled.

I had a sudden whim a couple of nights ago to see aged down Dean and current Jack hang out. Bring back Dylan Everett to go play basketball with Jack out on the front step.

-

“Gave us all nice things,” she says, clutching at a HUGE EVIL EMERALD PENDANT AROUND HER NECK

Jack……………………………

Is that cursed

-

“She said having us there kept her young” She put her own age into that locket

dang I should get a bonus point for bringing up poker!witch before he was relevant

I’m always curious about the show’s implications about witches maintaining their youth by sucking it from others, because almost every witch we’ve met who had a focus on age was doing it for that reason, whether it was eating children or playing poker.

And we have a 300 year old witch chilling around who we don’t know anything about when it comes to immortality, except that she has it and she bestowed it on Oskar so it’s clearly a spell she can do rather than an inherent trait of reaching a certain level of magic practitionery.

-

“Then it started taking me too. Even faster than the others!” yeah because she killed the witch so she probably has to suck poor sleeping beauty dry in order to regenerate and skulk away and start over somewhere

-

PS: Sleeping Beauty is really doing an amazing performance here. I 100% am in Jack’s shoes of being horrified and wanting to protect her

-

“Cas is going to fix this. I promise” Sweetie! Have you ever called him Cas rather than Castiel before? It seems weird. He even wrote castiel on the letter

-

Sam deducts Michael’s entire plan off the clue that Alex couldn’t detect the vamps in her sciencing, and based on having been attacked by super werewolves.

But why is Michael cleaning up these people?

Unless he’s taking threats off the board who would be too cool and powerful and may challenge him…

-

“Doesn’t change the plan”  
“but Dean - ”

Dean walks off

Dean has no time for Sam suggesting maybe this is something awful because of Michael that Dean might know about or else be weirdly intimately connected to because of his weird Michael-based condition.

We have no clue what’s going on and Sam doesn’t like that and Dean’s powering through and Jody is hovering in the background like WOW I can see why you leave me out of all your dumb main plot angst normally. Never done me one of these MAIN PLOT ones before. Can we go back to normal MotW where you’re low key angsting in the subtext about whatever currently ails you?

-

Jody slaps Sam on the lower back

lower, babe. Lower.

-

Cas does magic, boom purple smoke!

Aw no she’s still withered.

Jack, take her necklace off and smash it

because you did the good work of a hunter and talked to her and through being kind discovered what was wrong with her

-

Jody has a phone provider that gets her signal in the wilderness

-

“Claire’s been doing so good, but anything connected to Kaia… she’s a powder keg”

“FIRST LOVE STRIKES QUICK, AND TO LOSE IT LIKE THAT”

okay no Jody didn’t shout it, but Bobo did.

ILY Bobo

I’m like 0% surprised but I am guessing other people who had been less trusting are throwing a complete party to have it textually confirmed like that. I felt like Bobo’s intent especially when he went on the record in that stream AND he had been saying already that he shipped it right after Wayward Sisters, that he never ever meant to be coy about Dreamhunter, and confirming that Claire was madly in love with Kaia was a top priority on his fuck you list since he didn’t get to write the show he wanted in order to work on this naturally.

-

Sam nods like fair enough, happened to me with Jess, but uh wow okay no i did not - yeah okay yeah

-

“He’s not ready for this case”  
“maybe he needs it”

Jam jam jam jam

I mean

Yeah mature adults discussing issues together and working out how they feel about Dean rage-hunting Bad Kaia

-

hey look it’s that one cabin that has been in like every episode of the show in the same way that one little stoney valley was in every episode of BBC Merlin

-

Has she lost her spear??

-

Dean, that was RUDE, you’re so horrible to all these versions of Kaia

-

That zoom up on his face is one of the top 10 Dean Is Not Okay zooms of the show

-

So not like “bad cas” or “new bobby” are Dean’s definitions for AU peeps - no word on what Charlie is to him, maybe because AU Charlie is a real issue for him to define as he couldn’t help treating her like his Charlie.

But Bad Kaia insists that she is to Kaia what she is to me - they’re joined in a different way. A way that back in Wayward Sisters was implied to be a dreamwalking connection of a very different sort, something anchoring our Kaia to the bad place and their connection was… weird.

-

“That was an accident. I was trying to kill the blonde” She’s remorseful about killing Kaia but upsets them even more by reminding them that she was out for Claire instead.

How about we kill no one, bad Kaia

-

Oh no, Michael keeps sending monsters after her… Now she sounds like the original Kaia just because she’s got “always more” things out for her. I suppose Michael learned of her through Dean, found her, and either wants to stop her or capture her because she has universe-crossing dreamwalking abilities, and woooow that will be useful to him.

-

NOOO SLEEPING BEAUTY DIED. THIS IS REALLY BAD. JACK COULDN’T SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVE HEEEEEEEEEER

waaaaaaaaaah

Stop fuelling Nougat having an interesting dark arc about his entire self and purpose and let him just hang around the bunker and watch TV and eat nougat and be hugged. Can we not just have a son who is okay and nothing is wrong with him?

-

Oh no even the random hunter (did I really catch her name as Brunhilda or did I imagine that?) is crying at Jack crying over Sleeping Beauty dying. Cas is contractually obliged not to cry or do complicated stunts but he looks miserable too.

Oh, jack figured out the pendant?

But can they actually save Sleeping Beauty?

-

Sam as usual getting in before I can - “Break her!??!?”

don’t you dare hurt Kaia any more, she’s already told you what she knows, Michael hurt her, you punched her out with the same face and then threatened her a bunch. She might be a snarky monster-hunting feral woodland weirdo but she’s still Kaia-like and you have a history of being completely horrible to Kaia-like girls when you’re in a bad place.

-

And it turns out Dean just wants the spear that pronged him, to figure out what it did and how to hurt Michael with it. To go on his own revenge mission that he denied Jack because, guys, we are now in competition for who gets to have the angsty anti-Michael revenge mission. Jack and Dean literally competing to be most angsty about it.

Jack is being considerably more productive even if Dean solved the Kaia mystery.

But yeah. Revenge sucks you guys.

-

Dean you need to eat a snickers and take a rest.

-

smiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirk because fuck you Dean for always hurting me and the other Kaia who is probably also me.

-

Jack is being much smarter.

The smartest cookie.

Who needs powers when you are a good cookie.

-

“She wasn’t cursed. This was.”

GOOD COOKIE.

-

I vote Jack gets to kill Michael. Dean has lost his Michael killing rights.

-

“You’re no different from him. Threats, violence, anything to get what you want.”  
“I am nothing like him.”

Hon.

“Yeah you are. And you always have been.”

I don’t know if Kaia knows or if she’s pulling a gambit, but acting like a mystic know it all and reading Dean stone cold in a villain way sure did take some of his rage away into that good old Dean self-loathing and fear, which was one heck of a good chess move regardless of if she can magically read him or not.

No I don’t think Dean is these things but Michael is a means of exploring Dean’s “blunt little weapon” sort of mindset that he has suffered from because of John’s upbringing all this time, and Michael emotionally mauling Dean to the point of being a non-functioning worst version of himself who threatens Kaia (AGAIN) really is an on the nose way to display the sort of trauma that Michael tore into his psyche.

-

Crap I need to go to yoga, but this is too good to rush so even though I don’t have much left, I will be back for proper notes in a bit!

-

Him smash magic glowy thing with hammer

just like i told myboy to do!

Cas’s hair is ridiculously spiky.

-

“What happened?”

YOU MADE NOUGAT FEEL GOOD ABOUT HIMSELF THAT’S WHAT HAPPENED

Aww jack to an empty room

-

Sam I  have been gone for hours. How have you not tackled Dean to the floor and apologised to Bad Kaia

-

“I saw what you did to her, when you got angry. You shoved your gun in her face.”  
To be fair, at the time Dean had also been emotionally mauled by the feels bear because Jack gave him a vision of Mary being tortured in Hell-equivalent and he was also fucked up beyond belief.

Kaias really are seeing the worst side of him all the time.

-

Bobo likes breaking Dean

-

That was enough to make Dean let go

Also to ask a really good question about how she knows!

I’m way more curious about Kaia than Dean yelling at her :P

-

Then she points out that he’s angry and impatient because he’s scared, like, duh, but sometimes he needs to be reminded that he can have “weak” emotions like that because he wants to be all tough and on the case and instead he’s freaked out because Michael has messed him up completely. Like. Stay home. Help the boy with lore or something. Take a pyjama day.

-

Wheee full flashback!

The early evening light gives it a Bad Place colour tinge, which is awesome.

-

I can’t believe Mikey shows up in his hat but not his jacket.

-

He says he’s BORROWING Dean here. Hm.

-

Also, what I suspected, that he sensed her around and was just curious. Probably having a “what the fuck that’s KAIA!?” from Dean inside him and being like Kaia huh? Time to chat.

-

Mikey do you literally not have your own version of that fuck off huge spear they stabbed Cas with a couple seasons ago, or do you just collect cool spears?

There’s something more than usually terrifying about his face in this conversation.

And he now says there’s a war coming and thinks something weird like Bad Kaia might appreciate being on his side.

Oh boy.

-

“Wild one” that’s so cool

-

Michael really has some great lines for being a massive pillock

-

Omg he fight good too

-

AAH this is Kaia’s memory and she’s psychically implanting it in Dean’s head

“Stop!” he says, clearly not enjoying watching himself beat up Bad Kaia and, like, realising exactly how awful it looks to do this when he has to watch himself from the outside and for all we know feel her pain too.

-

Of course Dean being desperate to get the spear to fight Michael could come across with a blur of ambiguity of Michael being desperate still to have it, whether to stop Kaia using it or because he just really wanted it and doesn’t like being told no.

The concept that Michael just disappeared from Dean still lingers.

-

So many fights with a whole bunch of people this season. Maybe just because there’s so many friggin characters

-

“Now you’re in trouble”  
*Bad Kaia literally leaps through a window to avoid dealing with this*  
I love her

-

NICE STAB

thanks for saving Jody

-

Well that was quick

Also you’re badass and terrifying and I think Claire might fall in love with you too >.>

-

“I’m used to it” Oh babe.

She literally raised herself in a terrifying doomy forest so

I mean at least this world has dry crackers and beans. SCORE

-

Jody has got a LOT of thinking to do about how to phrase any of this to Claire.

“So there’s a feral Kaia living in the woods outside of town”

-

Awww Sam offering her a lift to the hospital

Bobo wants us to remember 9x06 and Dean having to tend Cas’s broken hand maybe

-

Sam. Hug her right now. RIGHT NOW.

-

Nope Jody just looks really tormented

-

She’s in a reverse Jack position - one mom to 3 hunters instead of one kid to 3 hunters :P

-

Hey look it is Jack and one of his fathers.

“Jules is off!” Hey look Sleeping Beauty was called Jules. Nerdylittleshit doesn’t read these notes however so she will never know that I decided this character was named after her :P

-

Cas apologises for not being there for Jack, because it took this long to realise he’s the father who’s always at work while others have taken the stereotypically maternal role to Jack, Cas just gets to be the cool strong father who is usually dead, captured or just busy saving people and too busy for Jack as a result.

-

“It’s okay,” Jack says, sounding considerably more emotionally balanced about it than he had in 14x01 when everyone was neglecting him

-

“Today you PROVED that you have the mind of a hunter. And the heart of a hunter” Raised by the best, bitches!

-

Awwww Cas wants to be a hunter with Jack! They can get a terrible car and hit the road and do an easy case and bond as they go and eat crappy food at diners and

Jack develops Nephilim Flu in response to having a nice moment with a father because he’s so unused to being treated with full attention.

-

Cas: *squints*

-

“Must be getting my first cold!”

I have a cold too Jack! Awww!!

-

Cas is going to make him some soup. This is too sweet. I don’t even have words for any of this it’s just gross. My teeth hurt.

-

Jack I swear to god if you stopped your revenge quest and it hurt you so bad inside you’re about to cough up a lung I am going to LA to kick the writers’ asses in person so if you dare be even the slightest bit consumptive

-

Oh thank god the scene changed before he coughed blood into his hand

-

Awww and then Dean admits Sam was right, while still being the one driving on the way back.

I wonder if they filmed these side by side. “Dean slow down” “Sam you were right”

-

“What Michael used me for” Ouch, hearing him say it like that… Sad sad thoughts.

He just wanted to skip ahead and have it all done because revenge makes you feel SO much better.

-

“Dean… you did what you had to do” Okay it’s even worse hearing someone else justify it rather than hearing that phrase come out of someone’s mouth. At least when they say it about themselves they’re just in a bad place. I don’t even know if this is a pavlovian response I’m having but really flipping it around to have Sam say it is a validation - Sam certainly thinks things are better off with a dead Lucifer and would have a favourable bias, because it got the job done and whatever Mikey is up to at least it’s not Lucifer doing it. Because even if Lucifer were doing the exact same things it would just be intangibly but clearly worse.

-

“It wasn’t a blink, being possessed.”

Dean says to Sam, who has been possessed by an angel twice and when it was Gadreel, for almost as long as Dean was Michaeled

-

Dean’s so freaked out because fighting the drowning sense of being possessed was so horrifying and made him feel so weak and useless and he didn’t even win that fight, Michael just bailed and let him have it back. With the “I own you” hovering over him.

It certainly reeks of being haunted by a bad relationship. The sense the nasty abusive ex hovering around outside the place you work every night…

-

“And it’s all on me, man” No it isn’t, he got through because Lucifer told him how.

-

Well I mean if you wanna go cosmic consequences, yeah it is because Billie done told you not to go universe hopping and that’s several billion dominoes you messed around with doing exactly that

-

But despite how I spent all of season 13 SHRIEKING at you not to do it while knowing full well you did, and how this is technically your cosmic hubris for doing that, I also don’t actually blame you on a personal level, Dean. Just, like, so you know once I get back to the shrieking. Because ow you are very sad and in pain and if Nougat wasn’t coming down with Nephilim Flu in the other scenes I’d basically rank you No 1 for wrapping in blankets and feeding soup.

-

You’re still in the top 10. Jodi had a pretty bad day too :P

-

Oh COME ON JACK

*starts packing my bags for the ass kicking*

-

Aww Jack to an empty room

-

Um EXCUSE ME HOW MANY CONSUMPTIVE TISSUES HAVE YOU GONE THROUGH?

GO FIND YOUR FATHER RIGHT NOW

-

HAVE YOU BEEN DOING THIS FOR THREE WEEKS?

Well no wonder you’ve been in a panic to get Michael killed.

SHEESH.

Dean’s back and he’s gonna kick your ass because he remembers when Sam did this in the Trials and he is very very anti consumptive family members.


	4. 14x04

Happy Birthday, Davy!

-

Mittens just ominously warned me to warm up this notepad while I waited for the episode to finish downloading.

The nice guy from the phone provider has recently restored our internet after 4 days of radio silence from me, but it’s only about 4'o clock on friday, so really some good timing!

Expectations: pre-mittens warning, Davy back on his nonsense with the scary episodes and expected nonsense of sinking back into MotW after mytharc but in capable hands because, you know, new writing team is aces and all.

post-mittens warning: idk but I should get a stuffed toy?

-

That’s a suspicious amount of ghost lore.

Has Heaven started dumping the spirits out now and if it really IS a ghost it’s not going to behave properly?

-

Oh my god it’s a Hell Hazers poster.

There was something I would have talked about pre-episode but had no internet so didn’t, but the focus on Dean and nerds and the expectation that this episode would be about a comic book store, did remind me of 9x07 and the action figure which was all “i clobber evil!” and was a strong Dean mirror, including that he needlessly burned it on the stove to try and get rid of the ghost of the mom but it turned out she needed to be talked into letting her son let her go in a scene which has all sorts of shades of Dean vs Mary in 12x22 now and also Dean’s entire mark of cain arc was in the self-destruction of his self as an action figure that clobbered evil. A reminder that Dean is this figure seems fairly timely with him coming down from being possessed, as of course he has been used as an action figure. And his willingness to turn himself into one in 13x23 was very much turning himself into the Michael Sword, which in this cosmos is practically like the rarest collectible action figure of the universe. This harks back all the way to the first season and Dean’s issues with John’s control and the whole blunt little instrument arc, also something that fed directly into demon!Dean, and is being reflected this season in Nick, who murdered a guy with a hammer, after his family was murdered by a hammer, and said yes to Lucifer because of all that angst about hammer murder. Subtle.

Anyway, this is sort of the emotional background to me for action figures in the show.

A Hell Hazers poster also reminds us that Dean is a horror fan, his own connections to the genre, a CLASSIC episode, and a time when he was living his best life briefly.

You know, before he sold his soul for *waves at previous big paragraph* reasons

Fitting for how season 13 ended with Dean this close to happy world peace retirement living his best life :P

-

Awww the fake movie the MotW comes from is called All Saints Day. Davyyy :’)

People I know who are born on like October SECOND consider themselves extra spooky halloween people. I can only imagine what it does, as a 23rd Oct. birthday person, to the psyche to actually be born ON it.

This episode’s subtitle is just “Lol I have the best birthday, fuckers”

-

ACTUAL CLIP FROM 2x18!

And the fucking racist truck >.> Which in-universe was teased as another different movie using the footage in the trailer for Hell Hazers II.

-

My mum has that exact Wonder Woman figure

-

This guy is wearing a trenchcoat-featured jacket with a maroon t-shirt under it. I could not tell you what he represents but the trenchcoat part is amusing.

I can’t *actually* start saying everything is party!Cas symbolism though so I’ll just shush

-

Er this rando that people were saying was dressed like Sam from the promo images literally is called Sam, and she’s wearing a very very loud checkered shirt, of course featuring a lot of orange. I’m guessing with that info it’s next to impossible to say she ISN’T in some way a Sam parallel :P

Comic Book Guy is possibly caught in the middle of stealing an action figure, and I can’t work out if he is just nervous about that or has a crush on Sam because his behaviour was so suspect, but from the promo scene where he looks a lil worse for the wear he talks about breaking up with his goth gf, and Sam is very clearly a nerd, not a goth.

(Goth nerds are things. The media will get there one day :P)

-

Oh okay after a few lines of the exchange, yeah this guy is a dick, I have NO clue why he’s wearing that coat symbolism wise, and Sam really ought to fire him because wow, uncool and also he seems to be a stereotypical nerdbro gatekeeper who would literally rather scare off customers but be right than just enjoy what they all enjoy together.

-

Then he apologises for getting angry for saying he just gets spun out sometimes. Honestly, this seems to be crossing over into Dean territory considering the last thing from the recap was Dean being told he was like Michael by Bad Kaia and being really angry when he said he was nothing like him… He also used “spun out” about himself in 12x20 but in rather more tragic lost-Cas circumstances but obviously this parallel has a different lesson to tell than just making them equivalent. This guy is so awful and is using his anger in a petty way over things that don’t really matter. He’s getting spun out over made up battles rather than real angst, and whether he has his own underlying trauma that makes him behave that way or not, the straight white nerd is one of the secondary main villains of the century so far after the literal alt right, with some overlap of course. Think Kylo Ren as one of the dominant critiques of this behaviour :P Compared to the open of 8x11 for example, where the nerds were harmless weirdoes despite also being straight white and obsessive, the aggression and obsession are played not just as a harmless trait of people who like LARPing and collecting toys, but gatekeep, yell at kids over superman facts, and refuse to have their own dominance challenged.

Thinking he could fight superman might actually explain the Cas like jacket - it’s too short to be a coat - that he idealises these heroes, is wearing Batman (who in pop culture most recently was around “v superman”) and Cas of course has all his superman comparisons from both 6x20, and his rebirth in 12x01 where he came back to earth as a fiery comet and was immediately mistaken for a spaceman. There’s some dark idolisation/mirroring here, that he’s debating how to fight the guy (krytonite gloves = the BMoL knuckledusters) and at the same time mirroring the show’s Superman in his dress. Only much, much lesser. More subtextual mockery about his weakness and how he doesn’t really measure up.

I think in a lot of ways the discourse about nerds in pop culture is moving on now to  make this difference clear, that the ones who will be mocked are the ones who deserve it for being too cruel to respect, while in many other ways the mainstreaming of nerd culture into pop culture, meaning a large amount of it is no longer mockable, that everyone had at least SOME nerdy indulgences, means that in general nerdom is more accepted and exalted than ever. SPN obviously having its own deep roots into nerd culture has some direct room for commentary here, and this is also a way of reminding its own fans to be cool and not to be this guy.

-

Oh, huh, he safely exited the shop. I did not see that coming.

-

LOL he has batman bedding on a fold out bed in either a shed, garage or basement where he lives.

(This detail was tragic in Attack the Block but it’s quite clear in this case the guy is fully grown and is being used as a detail to show his forward progression in life)

-

Wow, you really have some rage issues here. Especially trying to wrangle free pizza i mean dude. Talk about a line that personifies him 100 different ways in one go :P Who shouts at their pizza delivery place?? They remember your number! This is how to get extra toppings.

-

Oh my god please get beaten to death by this lil guy

(I know I know he survives he’s in the promo)

Is this like… haunted kidney episode… but better?

Actually, Fallen Idols plus Mannequin episode but better.

-

You know how we saw in the last new year? Watching Small Soldiers for the first time since like the 90s or whenever it came out

-

The show’s animation is so much better

Than Small Soldiers and itself from past years

-

Oh DEAN

-

I mean he totally deserves a day off.

-

I can’t believe he owns these socks. Who got them for him for Christmas?

Okay, well first we have to work out which was the last Christmas they had where they were not in prison or in an alternate dimension or dead or -

-

Cas. It was Cas.

-

He literally had no idea this wasn’t just a cute commentary on how much Chinese take out Dean eats

-

Anyway as far as I can tell Dean is living out the bisexualdemondean header just to spite Michael for defiling his temple. He’s filling it with noods and pizza (and I am sure he didn’t yell at the delivery guy, but tipped him well instead for making drop offs at a shady street corner miles from where anyone lives)

-

Honestly it’s been 12 years since Hell Hazers II… What took them so long

-

Dean’s drunk a full thing of Margiekugle mom beer, which is a lil worrying just in terms of him using it instead of comfort from her like in 12x02, now that she’s back.

-

God I want Dean to meet the asshole from the comic shop and for him to get into a dick measuring contest about Hell Hazers II and Dean to be like uh I WORKED on it you ass

-

Er, does that vending machine contain the nougat of choice of your consumptive son on the other side of the wall?

(who may be out with Cas concealing his consumption on a case so not bothered by all this TV noise)

-

God I love and have missed Dean, my trashy guy who is sitting hugging a pillow like a teen girl at a sleepover to watch his hatchetman slasher to celebrate being back to himself and get the much-needed R&R, since, you know, last time we saw him he threatened to “break” Kaia and was in a very very bad place (lol)

-

This guy about to get murdered for trying to snatch a nougat bar is dressed like the unfortunate bandmate (Tommy?) to Vincifer. Is this an oblique Ladyheart reference to set up a weird scenario where Hatchetman is punishing a Lucifer-adjacent asshole for trying to steal Nougat?

-

I can’t believe there’s a red exit sign behind him which means Wanek is Waneking in multiple dimensions at once

-

“Mint Condition” flashes up over Dean indulging in his pizza, saying, hey look it’s our guy back in shape. Or, you know, ironically so. Either because Dean being Dean means eating junk food and wallowing because his husband has wandered off with the kid and isn’t home to snuggle him while he does this mandatory bedrest, or because, of course, Dean is not Mint Condition at all. He’s literally and emotionally scarred.

-

I am pretty sure this shirt that Sam has on is 12 years old.

-

Statistically, they’re gonna get murdered in each and every one of their original Kripke era shirts until none of them are available to be murdered in later.

I say for no particular reason.

-

Leave Sam alone. He doesn’t shave you mock him, he does shave, you… also mock him. He was doing really well while you were gone! No one got even slightly stabbed who didn’t deserve it! This is an all-time record. A beard is a price to pay for that.

-

Honestly I think Dean is stoned but they’re not going to say so but I am treating this scene like it is.

-

“I wanted to check up on you,” Sam says, pulling over a chair. This is so like how he was in 14x01 when he was powering around the Bunker being the boss, and given Dean’s been on bedrest, again, much-needed, Sam is treating him like another one of his charges, and once more is in a position of authority… But now, despite shaving to act like nothing has changed a bit more, he is the one in charge of Dean as one of his wards. Everything has changed. Your dynamic is actually wobbling in a weird way.

In season 10 when Dean was laid up with the Mark blues especially around 10x12, which this intro also reminds me of, re: Dean spending a week in his room and Sam popping in to check on him, Sam was still keeping a very wary eye on Dean more that he was a bomb that may explode, and that while he needed to be managed, the power dynamic was extremely, extremely horrifying in that if Sam messed up Dean would murder him. Not an ongoing implicit threat between them, but the knowledge that Dean could become a demon again and demon!Dean would attempt to kill Sam, and so Sam had better do his utmost to keep Dean in a good place. Even if it eventually meant a series of convoluted secrets to try and fix him against his wishes.

Obviously, things are different here. Sam has developed a LOT since then, with season 11 beginning a recovery of his character in tentative little steps which actually kicked off in season 12, and, specifically, in 12x04 under Davy Perez in American Nightmare heralding the new era of Sam focus and lovingly stroking his hair and lavishing him with Sam-sculpted episodes the like of which we hadn’t seen all through Carver era.

Now when Sam comes into Dean’s room and pulls up a chair and sits down to check up on him, he actually radiates a comfortable, competent authority to do so.

… however he is doing it in that pink shirt which I honestly love the concept of but just wish that I couldn’t see Sam in 2x06 showing up in it for the first time, like, my brain is just screaming at him to go get a bunch more pink shirts and refresh his wardrobe

I’m so certain of it but now I have to check because 12 years is such a long time but

[http://www.homeofthenutty.com/supernatural/screencaps/albums/SPN2x06/SPN_0060.jpg](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.homeofthenutty.com%2Fsupernatural%2Fscreencaps%2Falbums%2FSPN2x06%2FSPN_0060.jpg&t=Y2UxNjcwZTE0MTI4MjM5NzFjMDFjYWNkNjY3ODZlNjg0YWEzZjc0YyxJYkl6UkhqRg%3D%3D&b=t%3AEoTmUHpiEEiE91JGAXVv3Q&p=https%3A%2F%2Felizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F179697111128%2F14x04-watching-notes-happy-birthday-davymore&m=1)

Mittens yelled “OH MY GOD” when I sent her the link so I think I’m right

Like, conceptually in every way it’s great because it’s this long pink shirt that fits him well, fuck toxic masculinity, blah blah action heroes in pink shirts, love it love it love it, but also: it’s another fucking plaid shirt Sam has owned since he was a gap-toothed child six years younger than Jack presents as

-

Dean is lacking his second bedside table, as he has been for seasons, but I’m just staring at him lying sideways on his bed, wondering about his set up, and if this is in any way similar to how he watched all those cowboy movies with Cas, since Davy, of course, was the one to suggest that they had been watching movies together.

-

“And… not that I’m complaining… House is full of strangers”

Yeah, we know you hate it, Dean. God, it’s tragic. In a wonderful way. Sam’s built this little empire for himself and it’s on top of Dean’s old nesting spot. Dean’s been forced into his room not just to hide away because he’s ashamed but because he doesn’t want to be seen and there’s too many strange eyes out there. However this resolves, it’s going to force some growth. Honestly, as much as Dean loves this room and it means to us, it’s also a bleak lonely spot and in the like 7 years they’ve had the Bunker, Dean’s never hooked up in that bed, while it has come to be very much like, well… The bed of an angry nerd living in a basement still using Batman sheets. Again, dark parallels, but of Dean in a dark place.

I’d love if he moved out and got a house in the suburbs.

I mean.

Cas has a house in the suburbs.

(Re: long-running Lizzy watching notes in-jokes about where he stashes a bunch of stuff like demon tablets, first blades, metatron’s grace, etc etc)

But yeah, no. I like the idea of Dean nesting, of course. But aside from the obvious conveniences, the Dean Cave, etc, there’s no reason it HAS to be here except that this is their inheritance and it’s safe. But as I constantly talk about with the library abutting the war room, the work/life balance is always in question and filling the Bunker with strangers is a great way to shove all the life balance out, and leave the only spot left of that to Dean in this room.

If the AU peeps don’t all get sent home but remain at least in part a hunter community and maybe even network and grow as the Winchesters finally open up the Bunker’s resources and share them and stop being all isolated like Carver era fiercely protected… Dean might have no choice but to move his nesting down the road to somewhere with a sofa where he can park his car out front, and choose to commute in to work.

-

Awww they have the “our lives are a scary movie” argument again, in a well-worn way. So well-worn this is repeating dialogue from somewhere or other… 2x18? 4x07? God I don’t know, implicit in Sam’s eyerolling at Halloween in 1x01? All of the above? I am not looking that up. But anyway their stances haven’t moved, possibly because this is something that has never really been challenged before. If Sam didn’t hate scary movies already, watching 18 hours of Hell Hazers II dailies probably did in any remaining sympathy he would have had towards them, while Dean thrived there.

I guess he may finally have had time to watch it?

And of course stay for the credits to see his name.

Anyway Dean has historically cited movies as research or job adjacent, or vicariously enjoyed watching monsters at work from the safe remove of a screen, while Sam throws it all in to that box where of course it goes to 1x01 where he’s running away from ALL of it and has his oddly specific choices to avoid halloween in his day to day as Lawboy. He’s struggled to indulge in the weird as a hobby, likes serial killers as, as far as we can diagnose, an outlet of darkness but purely human, and keeps the work/life balance in a rather unhealthy way of denial and boxing things away, because so much of his early seasons arcs were about resisting the life and refusing the call. This harks back to their literal first episode characterisations of Dean being all in and Sam being all out and it’s interesting to have us back here in season 14, in a period of such deep reflection, when Sam has finally sort of accepted the life, found a niche in the work that suits him as the boss, and Dean is struggling now with retirement questions, and taking a week off, not liking his home full of strangers, etc etc.

-

“More Michael Monsters?” Dean asks immediately quick fire when Sam says he has a case.

He may have taken a week off to indulge in pizza but that obsession lurks under his skin. He’s in no way done, though I think perhaps better prepared to enter this case than he had been, though of course he’s billed as still struggling.

-

Dean also instantly recognises the Thundercats name, and I’m afraid it’s something I’m just not familiar with, that I clearly missed some wave of it when I was younger and it hasn’t come back around as an adult… I can’t wait to read stuff by people who know more about it and say tragic things about Dean’s connection to it. But the important thing here is the dark mirror to the guy who got beat up by the toy, because Dean is being shown as also an enthusiastic nerd who knows the franchise and is excited by this concept and is leaping into a case about it with a “strippers, Sammy. Finally!” level of enthusiasm.

Healthy nerds and unhealthy nerds. But at the same time, Dean might be a better nerd, but his anger last episode is still being examined through this guy.

-

I love that for Sam and Dean, dressing up for Halloween is dressing up like total nerds in a totally different pop culture way - the old appearance of geeks which is wildly outdated but damned if they aren’t putting on pocket protectors anyway. It’s a caricature but it’s one that is at total odds with who they are as people… More of a traditional halloween thing where normally Sam and Dean are really scary people with weapons, so when you make them dress all topsy turvy, they dress like this instead. They ARE halloween costumes, in their day to day.

-

Dean continues watching in the shop, Sam eyes up the Red Hood.

I watched that a million years ago with no idea that Jensen was in it, though I had watched the first couple of seasons at that point. I think it was during my “aww the show was cancelled” phase where it was completely off my radar. It’s hilarious to me now, because I don’t think I COULD watch it, now I know Jensen’s voice so disproportionately well. It would be so off-putting.

-

“She’s like your twin.”

Sam and Sam both tuck their hair behind their ears at the same moment.

“What are you talking about?”

So. This is going to be extremely subtle.

I hope New Sam survives the episode D:

-

Sam points out the other guy who people were saying based off the promo pics would be the Dean to this girl’s Sam with no idea what was to come. He and Dean in this case are both eating lollipops purloined from the halloween candy.

I guess this guy in the All Saints Day t-shirt shares Dean’s love of the same franchise, and seems to represent the bizarre venn diagram with Dean on one side and Andrew Dabb on the other. Their nerdy overlap.

-

I feel like Sam is just pointing out this character mirror to be an annoying sibling and wow do I love seeing them like this.

I also feel like there is no way Davy would do this if he wasn’t about to troll the fuck out of us with these parallels in some terrifying meta way and pointing out that character parallels are a thing this blatantly is about to be Awful somehow.

-

The Red Hood is staring disapprovingly at them through all of this

-

Anyway of course Dean Parallel immediately recognises Dean’s enthusiasm for Hatchetman and encourages him to press the button, which Dean does with glee. I CLOBBER EVIL. Wait no.

Sometimes we do bad things.

Oh dear.

Oh deeeeeeeeeeear.

Yeah, Hatchetman is like… idk, michael!Dean or something. Or some dark part of Dean where all his violence is and this twisted version is almost like the burned result of the I Clobber Evil hero being melted by Dean and - too meta, I am in pain.

-

“Vintage hot wheels!”

I know what you want because I have a smol 67 impala on my shelf. Nyoom.

-

He has an eeny weenie mystery machiney so he can make them race.

-

Okay guy who got beat up by a toy is called Stuart (I am so bad at names, honestly.)

Of course he got kicked out by his roomie for being insufferable about something as pointless as subs vs dubs, and Sam is already apologising for him before they even go meet him.

Considering there’s 3 people working at the shop and Stuart had a trenchcoat, but is also being mirrored to Dean, darkly, I feel like there might be some serious shuffling going on here that surface level, Stuart had that Cas marker, but… yeah

-

Heeee Dean stealing the Flash mug and making Sam have the one with the cats all over it. One mug representing Stuart, one representing his mum.

I mean it is Sam’s turn to have a relationship with THEIR mom this season. Idk if the mugs are actually symbolic over anything other than Dean living his best geek life right now.

I mean he’s added the glasses to his ensemble, he’s really living it up.

I hope he’s still wearing Send Noods under this

-

Awww it’s hot apple cider. What a good mom. This is a perfect halloween drink.

-

*Stuart Rage Sounds from below*

Wow this is subtle that he has some rage issues.

-

“Campbell and sons insurance” Hey remember when I said that this whole season’s emotional set up with Sam’s ownership of the AU peeps reminded me of season 6 and the Campbells? They also literally are the sons of Mary Campbell, so.

No lies, at least, with some serious stretching of the truth.

-

God, the detail that Dean has played Zelda.

He’s being nerdy out loud constantly, and without much fear of judgement. It’s wonderful. I guess he’s been jostled up enough by Michael that he doesn’t really care to hide this random pointless thing that in the grand scheme why should he be ashamed, and also he feels so much worse about other things that this is just an escape to have fun. It also reminds me of last season when he was mourning Cas except that this indulgence Sam is allowing him is co-sponsored by Dean and he’s throwing himself into enjoying the smaller things and being more openly Dean-ish than he has in a while. Like, I don’t think character comparisons to 8x11 for the nerds is the only way the episodes link :P

-

In 8x11 Dean’s initial reaction to LARPing is that it looks awesome, then he corrects at a look from Sam to being more judgy. In 9x04 as scripted, Sam is surprised that Dean want to read Game of Thrones. So idk if that’s just Robbie character interpretations since my 2 surface level examples are from his episodes or if that’s just been where open nerdery has lived in past years, but anyway. Sam isn’t stopping Dean from indulging in the same way - it seems he also recognises Dean’s nerdiness and is less threatened by it than before, in the sense that he doesn’t feel like Dean isn’t acting himself, but now accepts the nerdiness is a part of Dean.

-

“Who needs goth girl drama” dude you are the most awful over-dramatic asshole on the show now Lucifer is dead

-

LOL he’s trying to lie about being attacked by a toy now, and Dean points out that he got whooped so thoroughly he was beaten on the back and genitals - so yeah we look at his face and wiiiiince

-

“Lady you wasn’t kidding.”

-

“Big Bang in there…”

Goodness are we calling out the Big Bang theory for its toxic nerdery? Love it.

-

Sam and Dean halloween costumed as total nerds, still driving around in the Impala. The reverse of someone rolling up in a boring old modern car and, like, a bunch of Draculas get out.

-

Sam can shave off the beard but it can’t stop him Bobby-ing

Dean side-eyes this

-

“Yeah, it was Riley, he’ll be fine.”

“I don’t know who Riley is, but cool.”

God, I am so into this whole dynamic.

Tell me more, Davy.

-

“So seriously, what is your deal with halloween?”

“I don’t like it”

Dean, I am watching this episode on November 2nd, just so you know.

Anyway. This is literally. 1x01’s opening adult Sam moment. But Dean’s going back to poke Sam about it since he’s someone Sam won’t lie to in the same way that Sam was concealing his entire being from Jess. I mean this isn’t subtle - in 1x01 Dean calls Sam out for doing this. But then, Sam doesn’t exactly develop beyond it - in season 8 he does this with Amelia.

Because obviously if Sam is going to move forward and develop there’s still things which are not addressed. And if Dean is having his idea of home and work challenged, and his nest disrupted until perhaps he will fly it… Sam has never ever actually addressed his work/life balance in the meaningful way where… like… this was how his difference was introduced when we first ever meet lil babby Sam smiling innocently at us on screen as a kid who has the whole future ahead of him and no idea what torment he’s gonna go through. 14 years later, if he’s ever going to be a grown up who can handle himself in a relationship and know what is work and what is life and how he can watch halloween movies and not feel personally offended by them but enjoy them as a fantasy and a way of boxing off their world into a safe place they don’t have personal responsibility for…

Maybe he might just get a girlfriend who he can tell he is a hunter. Like. Dude. Dean was past that step before the show ever STARTED thanks to his time with Cassie.

-

Sam, also, metaphorically is an angry guy living in his mom’s basement, but perhaps in a more metaphorical way where it’s to do with living his whole life under the shadow of his mom horrifically dying as a result of the supernatural and being brought up feeling like a freak and just wanting to be normal and all

wheeee

-

Anyway Dean is probing for actual answers so I assume Davy will give us a solution to this this episode, but this is my take on it before we get into it properly.

-

Alternative hypothesis: Davy is personally offended that Sam doesn’t like halloween despite it being the best holiday, is determined to fix that and fuck canon, characters can change even 14 years later.

-

“Don’t give me this ‘every day is halloween’ crap because one it aint, we don’t eat that much candy”

I have missed Dean and I love him with every fibre of my being, brb I need to vibrate out of existence at the sheer joy of knowing him

-

That was the worst “we aren’t here staking out your house” move I have ever seen.

You are professionals who have been doing this together for 14 years

why was that so laughably bad?

-

The youtube comments are so cutting and a bunch of them are unfortunately true. It’s self-awareness of using the loser nerd trope but also, cutting in a way because of course Stuart is coming across so much as someone who deserves it - and we’re starting to see his mom is sweet and doesn’t seem to have caused any trauma in a surface read, and that he was the one who dumped his online gf, and he starts other fights at work or with roomies, so this is getting more and more into territory where he seems fully to blame for his own situation, and therefore you CAN mock him for living in mom’s basement, because he PUT himself there, and is single because he chose to be, and so on. The pervading sense that if he was a nicer person, none of this would be happening to him, right down to him stealing the toy in the first place.

-

Oh boy, the bloody handprint on the wall… We are back in handprint territory, and, you know, maybe because SOMEONE walking past it has been scarred on the wrong shoulder by the actions of an angel or something

-

There’s a chinese take out carton on the shelf in this basement. I doubt it’s a collectible.

Send noods.

-

Okay, that’s sort of weird.

-

If the mom is in costume I don’t get the reference. I hope someone else has handled that.

-

We’re going to get her POV on her loser son now, I guess.

-

“Everything’s fine :)”  
*leaves the room*  
“everything is not fine!”

Are we calling them out for using “fine” so loosely again too huh?

(Side note: Jack saying he’s fine while consumptive, and yeah I am still upset about that. What are you doing to the boy????)

-

Dean and Sam split up and as Sam walks off a nurse eyes him up and smiles. No idea how intentional that was but I mean, can you blame her? :P

-

You know, I don’t know anything about this franchise, but Sam just jumped to see a toy of a guy who looks weirdly similar to the vampires that ATE HIM a few weeks ago.

He checks over his shoulder in case Dean manifested at his side just in time to see that

-

Awww Dean and New Dean meet. “he must have awesome insurance”

He calls Stuart’s mom “Babs” which is hilarious. They seem close.

New Dean has issues with his dad and Stuart lets him crash with him no questions asked. I suppose Dean isn’t going to think too hard about how Sam’s choice for his parallel has issues with his dad.

This forgiveness for Stuart’s behaviour because he’s kind to his own people is a very TFW trait, which makes New Dean more like Sam or Cas forgiving Dean his outbursts, as he’s by far the ragiest of them, with Cas trailing in second and Sam the zen fucking master.

-

Lol Dean and New Dean are both dragged into the room to watch All Saints Day 3 like they’re being pulled in on a line

-

Oh dear, they’re bonding.

Davy isn’t usually on top of these things but he’s channeling a lot of Edlund today and Edlund always had these sort of guys like Andy or Aaron who are so Dean’s type in a harmless shared interests and getting stoned together way. This is a bit extreme with the guy’s tininess and scruffiness but you know, we’ll see how this develops, if it’s an accidental twins or a missed connections soulmate dealio.

… You’re taking to someone who’s still bitter that Andy and Dean would have been perfect together, so.

-

Also this New Dean guy is demonstrating how to be a Good Fan - he may be as intensely nerdy as Stuart, but he and Dean can compare movies and even though they don’t share a favourite, agree that the whole series is great and can see the merits both in each other’s favourites, and in another movie that isn’t either of their favourites but could be if they happened to be inclined that way.

So healthy :’)

-

“It was always nice to check out. I like watching movies where I KNOW the bad guy’s going to lose”

Ow ow ow. But yeah, there’s Dean’s pro-Halloween rationale, that the tropeyness of the genre has its comforts that every ridiculous horror thing is entirely safe and no one is ACTUALLY going to get eaten by any of these things. Which is also how normal people enjoy horror but at the metaphorical remove of being scared by things we may not literally meet but still represent anxieties we might have in our real lives.

Catharsis, yo

-

Sam barges in on New Sam to ask her the usual series of increasingly weird questions which get the “are you really insurance?” eyebrows.

“Downtown Salem” - are they in Salem as in the witch hunt one?

-

I kinda love how New Sam is talking with a speech bubble beside her. So meta.

-

I think New Dean is called Dirk.

-

Oops Stuart wasn’t one of the co-owners because he kept getting fired for stealing D: Stuart, dude.

-

“And you hired Stuart back?” “he’s my friend”

I think there is commentary appearing here about not just Stuart’s unhealthy explosive rage, but that the people around him enable it - even Jordan fired him TWICE rather than banish him forever. The cycle of coddling him without encouraging him to change… Again, this speaks rather more of season 10 and a critique of Sam n Cas from there rather than much currently ongoing with Dean. Sam was complicit in originally abducting Kaia and he and Jody didn’t move to stop Dean with Bad Kaia, so though it’s in the focus as a critique on Dean’s reactions, I feel like the real bad cycles were in Carver era. Though the behaviour still somewhat exists in Dabb era, the overall unhealthiness has declined so much, there isn’t a constant oppresive blanket of it as there is here in this shop with Stuart being so awful to everyone and self-destructive.

(It’s probably also not a coincidence that this thing has latched onto Dean as well, a la 4x06 I’d guess… Sam got no ghost vibes in the basement, Dean did, and was attacked… To me this is seeming to suggest that his current state has picked up the ghost’s ire in the same way in 4x06 he was vulnerable. Loops and loops of things going on so I’ll unpick that later if it does turn out to be the case clearly.)

Anyway. This seems to be more about destructive cycles and abusive dynamics, and I would hope a nudge for Dean, though his exile at the start of this episode also suggests to me he knew full well after threatening Kaia that he’d overreacted and needed to take 5, even if there was also a layer of sulking until news of Michael. Her call out was clear enough to make him self-reflect. So I would hope that this episode is here to try and steer Dean’s reaction through various pathways, ideally to keep him from falling into anything too awful, as a reminder of where this may lead?

-

Sam sees the glass case freeze over, and pulls out the EMF, playing it off and being like “nothing… carbon monoxide detector” even as New Sam is understandably a little freaked.

Is this messing with Sam’s refusal to tell Jess about monsters by having him keep the truth from New Sam until she’s physically endangered?

-

I mean, carbon monoxide in enough quantities to make the blatantly homemade gadget go “WHEEE” and light up every single LED is a good enough reason to flee the room

-

“I think you’re in danger -” Sam is smacked around the head by Hatchetman because he delayed too long and now he has been knocked out

-

“Samantha?” Sam determined not to let New Sam out-Sam him

-

I mean if she is you then she has been knocked out

-

How does this keep happening to you

how much head trauma has Cas healed over the years?

This is why they have to keep him an angel…

-

“Is this expensive?”  
“Wha - no don’t!”  
*BOING*  
*silence*  
“yeeeah it’s shatterproof glass”

HA

-

If Jordan really just wants to kill Stuart for getting them a 1 star Yelp review then this also has a weird shade of 11x07 where the ghost was getting revenge and took a few attempts to kill that one guy, eventually succeeding as the clown.

Except the clown was tuned to freak Sam out

and Dean’s probably gonna be thrilled to fight Hatchetman

-

Dean having movie night with new Dean (probably stoned but we can’t see it) with comatose Stuart in the middle

incredible

-

2 dudes watching horror movies 5 feet apart with a comatose guy in the middle because they aren’t gay

-

Dean is thrilled to fight Hatchetman

I feel like this can’t last

-

Davy throws in a gratuitous Halloween moment of Hatchetman walking through the park which is just bedecked in Halloween nonsense

no one cares about him wandering around because it’s Halloween

It does make you wonder just HOW much nonsense happening on Halloween really is monsters and stuff out there enjoying themselves because it’s expected, which, again, like Sam n Dean dressing up as nerds for this whole episode, having monsters mixing with regular folk and being treated as equals is literally the whole Halloween thing. There’s less threat than in 4x07 because we’re assuming at this point in the episode that the ghost does have a pretty one-track mind about killing Stuart because with all the characterising nonsense filling the episode the actual plot has been pretty sparse considering we’re getting to the final 10 minute run now. So, yeah. This Hatchetman ghost is just out there being a part of the festivities, because that’s what happens on Halloween, man

-

LOL And like Sam not telling his double until it was too late, Dean gets this call and is really open in answering in front of new Dean, and now he’s filling in New Dean on everything instead of trying to get him to leave or protect him not just from the monster but from knowing about it at all.

-

Davy like, hey, remember when ghosts used to do loads of freaky stuff on this show just to be scary? And maybe it seemed like you all were getting bored of it or something, but hey this guy has no idea after 14 years that he shouldn’t leave the salt line when everything starts thumping in the room despite having been warned the ghost is coming…

-

Hehehe Dean gets an axe… The moment of him going to smash it then not and checking if it’s open… Whether that was improv or not, it’s a good character thing in the sense that Dean is being encouraged not to smash first and ask questions later by the meta plot of the episode

-

Omg New Dean is as brave as our Dean in some ways… He sees Babs in trouble, and immediately is like “HEY” and starts confronting Jordon in Hatchetman

-

“He’s MY friend. He’s OUR friend.” That’s an interesting take on my/our, because that statement works on both levels - both that Dirk is protective of Stuart because he cares about him, but also that Jordan has his own investment in not killing Stuart that he should remember. In terms of emotional appeal, the first is confrontational while the second is the deep appeal to the ghost.

Filed in the deep deep deep deep deep flips of the crypt scenes, this moment demonstrates about 3 different kinds of flips, while still holding true to possessing thing out of its right mind confronting loved one

-

Omg the hospital security guards watching the Hatchetman chase a damsel through the hospital while New Dean is chased through THEIR hospital. Talk about dramatic irony and a whole commentary on the metaness of Dabb era in the story reversals and extractions to new levels and repurposing of scenes and narratives…

-

And despite it playing out scene by scene, the guards are laughing at the bad dialogue and pointing out how Hatchetman is so slow, so how can he even catch them, while the damsel slows herself down and badly fakes a trip so that he can catch up to her…

-

“We killed you! You’re dead!”  
“We all do bad things sometimes”

And there we get the context for the cool quote the Hatchetman model can recite - just as how in fandom often things are quoted out of context as lines which seem emotional or special but are actually awful. Just for starters, all the Sam n Dean fans using “there aint no me if there aint no you” when Dean didn’t even SAY that. Now we see the context of this line, we see that while Hatchetman really isn’t deep, he’s at least not just saying it to sound cool and talk about himself, he’s judging the protagonist for her behaviour, as well as invoking relative morality. Which brings up some interesting ideas about what Hatchetman considers good and evil, in regards to seeming to have a concept of it but not including kill himself as a good thing to do. Obviously completely wild in context but in the philosophical language of the show, the nature of monsters and all is one huge question, along with if Sam and Dean are murderers themselves, and of course how they have done bad things for good reasons and vice versa.

-

Also I think Sam is about to blow up the door?

-

“I had a messed up childhood” he says, about to blow up a vintage SCOOBY DOO lunchbox to freedom.

SAMMY. Stop destroying symbols of childhood.

At least he’s talking freely to New Sam about himself, which is probably already more than he ever let on to Jess. He really wanted to pretend to be well-adjusted to her, that he probably, like, would have rather waited for a locksmith with her than just pick the door to their apartment if they were locked out, you know?

-

RIP Scooby Doo.

-

“Cool” they both say, and share a smile.

It’s probably weird to ship Sam and Sam just because the shipname is Sam

-

Dirk went to hide in the fucking Morgue

well done

-

Okay I need the security guards back to comment on how the fuck Hatchetman knew New Dean would come to the morgue with enough time to beat him there AND cover himself in a sheet and play dead.

-

Also before that happened Dean grabbed New Dean by the correct shoulder, and made him jump but aw don’t worry it’s just your new best friend.

-

Ghost Jordan is still a fucking nerd even in death because rather than talk to them, he presses the button to summon a catchphrase

It’s good to know some things never change even when you are a murderous shell of your former self.

-

UGH SIGH DAVY ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO DO THIS TO ME?

(The director might also be to blame)

So now they are cobbling together a fake trailer for Hatchetman, using footage from the show

That is to say, Hatchetman is set on Oct. 31st, 1983, or, of course, 2 days before Azazel ruined everything.

I’m not sure if this shot is from the show because we have so few Halloween episodes that an exterior shot with Halloween elements would have to be faked up, but the house looks very much like the old Winchester house, but with a bigger porch and more dramatic features. It does, however, strongly feature the tree branch shadows over the appropriate wall to make it look exactly like the opening shot of their story, while this is the opening shot of the Hatchetman story.

“David Jaeger was an honest man making an honest living” *generic shot of something being worked on*

*shot of the back of John Winchester’s head walking into his garage in 5x13 to discover his boss out cold because Anna is about to attempt to murder him, said boss hilariously visible in the shot if you know he’s there*

So. That happened :P Hatchetman is John. That ain’t subtle if you recognise the back of his head in a split second. Even if you don’t they’re casting him as a car mechanic which is of course directly connected to Dean and John.

“Until one night when a practical joke turned deadly”

*footage of the wife spectre-rage killing her husband in the cold open of 8x06 because she was still pissed he slept with someone else on prom night*

I think the burning vehicle was the car from 10x13 that Sam and Dean burned early in the episode, where it was violently reminiscent of them burning the memory of John for some meta reason I can’t remember at the time, but definitely inspired a lot of frantic fandom typing.

Of course the ghost in that episode was the classic ragey vengeance ghost which was blatantly paralleled to the path Dean was on with the Mark of Cain, complete with being crypt scened out of it by a trenchcoat-wearing widow.

They’re implying he was then burned alive and left for dead and I don’t recognise the footage of the burned feet but I assume they’re from some episode or another.

Anyway then they go to more new footage from the “actual” hatchetman movies. This one is set on Nov. 1st so it’s not even a “Halloween” movie but ACTUALLY All Saint’s Day (All Hallow’s Eve being what Hallowe'en is a corruption of), Nov. 1 being of course a meta nod to the fact the episode is not even airing on Halloween but Davy just really really really really wanted his halloween episode so shut up and enjoy it :P

Oh, it’s All Saints Day III The Reckoning. Because of course it’s a reckoning. That’s all that happens in Dabb era, reckonings.

-

I am so upset…. I made a joke about 5x05 waaay back, and now it’s true because of the whole random thing about Dean’s random Axe that was John’s that Paris Hilton was going to use to Reckoning him but then Sam murderered her before she could. Now Dean’s being reckoned.

-

Okay Dean is a lil dark right now but his come at me bro of “I was hoping you’d say that” and the preceding speech is incredible. I can’t believe this show has Jensen except that I CAN believe that with Jensen we go 14 seasons because FUCK he’s scary and intense when he wants to be.

-

But he delivered that chilling speech and then had the ghost use a red button to talk to him and then was badass at it

I mean

he can put the terror into ANY situation

-

I am a hysterical laugher, I could not have stood where Dean stood in that moment and taken Hatchetman seriously, even under threat of mortal peril. I once nearly got expelled for hysterical laughing over an untied shoelace that started a rapidly spiralling incident.

-

I love the new fight guy

I love how Dean is spoiling for a fight, and really enjoying how he can push back against this ghost, in a really, really scary way. But in a cold way, not the red hot Mark of Cain way he was dark last time. He’s grinning and enjoying this nerdy ass fight, but it’s got a vicious streak.

-

I especially love the choreography of Dean smashing Hatchetman around the head with clashes in time to the music followed by an elevator ding as Sam and New Sam emerge in the next scene.

Poetic cinema

-

New Sam guesses the key thing for ghost attachment and Old Sam is impressed.

Careful buddy, they’re lining you up for replacement.

-

Dean seems not to have won this fight with the Hatchetman. I bet if Stuart was awake he’d have some useful advice for how anyone could beat him in a fight but especially Stuart, if they knew the correct thing to do.

-

New Dean saved Old Dean! Maybe we can teamwork distract the Hatchetman and win together. Possibly this is a metaphor for… working with yourself…

Is it foreshadowing for a fight later in the season of plot significance, just like in 11x07 Sam got beat up by a clown in a cage, as a not too subtle metaphor for Lucifer? I’d love an in Dean’s head kinda nonsense with Mikey.

-

“Dean, key chain!”

TEAMWORK BROS ARE THE BEST BROS

-

New Sam chips in for her part with fuel for the fire.

Everyone high five the Sam or Dean/Dirk to your left

-

Oh, COOL effect of a ghostly spirit burning out of a model Hatchetman, who is unscatched by the ordeal

-

I mean, good, he’s probably a really expensive collectible

-

He falls over with a thud, and goes out on a warbling “time to slice and diiiiiiiii” much like “I clobber evil” died on the fire with a last gutteral noise.

Hopefully bookending each other in terms of models with representations in their voices that haunt Dean and all.

-

Dean, unprompted, thanks Sam for getting him out of his funk and giving him an easy ghost hunt to win. I guess what 13x05 was supposed to be is what this actually turned out to be.

(Honestly, giving Davy episodes post-drama to let us all unwind is turning out to be an extremely good idea with 13x06 as well)

-

I am MAJORLY concerned about the time stamp on this episode. It better end in a few seconds and go to a full 3 minute trailer for Hell Hazers III or else.

-

“It was awesome!”  
“it wasn’t really,” says Sam, who burst into the room in time to see his brother pinned and choking

-

Sam moves on to confronting Dean with the concept of not just hiding in his room when they get back.

He gives Dean the “OI, CHEER UP” talk we’ve all been yelling at the screen. Good. Good Sammy.

Dean turns to the camera. “I’m never going to get over it. I’m just not.”

Look, Sam, just because Dean stabbed Lucifer for you, and now you are sleeping without fear, doesn’t mean everyone has that luxury :P

-“

elizabethrobertajones  
Oh dear, there’s still 4 minutes left  
er  
I guess  
I keep watching  
….  
*grimaces nervously*

mittensmorgul  
:D  
just watch it in context with the rest of the episode

elizabethrobertajones  
um what  
I didn’t get far enough into what happens next to know what you mean  
so that’s super ominous  
Sam is still psychoanalysing Dean in car  
NOW yo uhave me REALLY worried.

Hey, remember how I started this episode with a vague warning from Mittens? Why am I now getting the feeling that I still haven’t watched whatever that was about?

-

"I’m not doing any good cooped up in my room. So whatever you need, I’m there.” (“Chief”?)

-

“Alright, Chief?”

Oh, man. I’m turning into Dean.

-

Also Dean appears to have, finally, ceded power over to Sam. Again, the reversals of season 10 - Sam was put in this position of power he just was not ready to cope with and not with the stakes that were laid against him. But here, Dean might be driving the car but he’s putting all the real power into Sam’s hands.

-

elizabethrobertajones  
Is it why Sam hates Halloween because Dean turns out to have set an alarm on his watch to remind him to bug Sam about it again  
the intrigue you have spun is starting to get to me more than actually watching the episode :P

mittensmorgul  
oh gosh, I should’ve just kept my mouth shut. It was seriously just an innocent comment for a nice BM scene :P

-

I am more horrified about the concept of Sam telling an embarrassing story than I am about any amount of slasher and gore. Look, I can Not handle social squickiness and I love Sam and that is going to make this extremely hard to hear.

Dean’s gonna love it though, I can tell.

-

Please. Protect. Sammy.

-

“It was soooo bad” he says with a haunted look of a man who has been tortured by the devil

-

Andrea’s party got there first

-

“Next year, we’re doing halloween right”

Oh no, don’t you dare start talking like you’re going to be alive and ready for a party next year, Dean Winchester. I will perish in your place to make it happen.

-

BAHAHA Dean coming up with matching outfits and suggests Bert and Ernie, before rejecting that one as too weird.

Yeah, you might not remember but we do

We are never going to let you live it down, in fact.

-

Also, listen, his mouth runs miles ahead of his brain, that was not suggestive until he realised it was and backtracked

-

You also can’t go as Shaggy and Scooby unless you go to a party WITH them and they go as you and Sam

-

Thelma and Louise… Dean, stop.

Okay it’s hilarious that Davy managed to get both Bert and Ernie and Thelma and Louise into this like… somewhere riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight deep down Dean’s consciousness is putting things together. It doesn’t remember half the shit he says, but like. Hey. Why ARE those two sets of on screen pairs connected, huh, Dean?

-

Oh, whatever, he’s just trying to annoy Sam now

-

Nyoooom

-

IT’S THE SECURITY GUARD

RUN, MAN, RUN

-

Ew, I left it playing to type that and it told me to watch Legacies

-

Well that was the one wrong note in this whole episode so I suppose something had to happen like that :P


	5. 14x05

filed under: episodes that demand a written apology from the writer

Morning, I opened the episode to check it worked and the first thing on screen was dead Maggie, so I guess skip the preamble, let’s get rid of that D:

Meredith is going to look after Maggie. Who so far this season has just been the human representation of the :o emoji

-

Er, she’s not going to look after us, after the THEN card we abruptly drop into Dean having his beach retirement chat with Sam

A lingering reminder of how Jack would help - if he had his powers - but Sam asks “then what would we do” and cut to Dean being Michaeled. At this point I can’t tell if we need to remember 13x23 for Reasons or if they just don’t trust us to remember the recent history of the show at all and are catching up people who might have dropped by to see how their favourite guest star, Maggie, is doing.

-

I mean I love her but she isn’t the headliner normally :P

-

OH GOODNESS SHE’S THE COLD OPEN GIRL. Maggieee no. She looks so scared. Why are they sending her hunting on her own??? She is a smol scared bean who was not prepared for the apocalypse and surely must be able to find other off-the-radar jobs for a person from another universe in this world that don’t involve throwing herself at monsters!

-

She’s wearing pink trousers for a stealth mission at night. She makes Sam’s orange jacket look like camo

-

Also she’s recording herself… Maggie… What are you doing…….. hon………………….

-

I have adopted her, but it turns out I have another stupid child among my many, many stupid children and just once I wish they didn’t turn out like this :P

-

So she’s like, attached a go pro to herself to record her hunt for… training purposes? reporting back to Chief? because she’s become an adrenaline junkie after all the time she was nearly eaten by supervampires?

-

MAGGIE

Gad dangit

He was slow moving and you heard him behind you. Swing first, ask questions later, when it’s a growling noise in a dark crypt.

-

Has anyone been counting the apocalypse world peeps because I’m pretty sure they’re relying on us not to recognise them because they’re a crowd. At this point we almost certainly have like 50+ distinct individuals instead of the 25 they purportedly rescued.

I say this because I feel like some of the white guys from the original batch appear to have metamorphosed into a more diverse group

-

Sammy setting homework.

Sorry, not Sammy. The Boss.

Dean comes in to observe class.

Sam immediately sheds all his confidence and goes back to being Sammy. He does seem to have a slight layer of scruff more, or maybe it was just that he was looking particularly clean-shaven last episode out of shock

Dean offers to get him a camp counsellor whistle, and Sam gets even more awkward about hunter check ins. I can see this feeding itself here, with Sam blustering and getting weird about his position of authority in front of Dean, and Dean who is both latching on in a brotherly way, and lashing out in a recently emotionally maimed Dean way, but can’t yell at the apocalypse peeps they rescued and graciously allowed to stay because, you know, Michael destroyed their world, so taking it all out on Sam… Unfortunately, Dean being the wounded, irrational party, it’s down to him to realise he’s being a lil too harsh on Sam OR Sam to stop rising to the bait.

In this case, I would say the ball is firmly in Sam’s court, not because he’s at any particular fault for instinctively reacting like the needled little brother when big bro wanders in snarking at his attempts to do his job, but because he is the one behaving like the adult already in this scenario when he’s facing the AU peeps and being The Chief in a natural way where he’s thriving in the environment, and crumpling immediately in the face of this one random element is a clear part of his growth and maturity arc. As it is he’s feeding Dean’s reaction a LOT by getting embarrassed and changing his behaviour and not standing his ground and continuing to act like a mature adult, and giving Dean the little brother teasing opening he feeds off in the dynamic.

In other scenarios this could flip with Sam doing his best and Dean being a dick who’s seeking an opening and trying to get Sam to crack and in that case it would be all on him to correct his behaviour, but in this case, I’m leaning Sam being the problem despite the appearance, because he crumpled just to hear Dean coming up the steps, never mind how it went from there. He’s acting ashamed of being the leader, because he knows it’s emotionally infringing on Dean territory, as he sees Dean as a natural and more rightful leader, and doesn’t recognise his own strengths and skills being applied in spades here; his self-confidence immediately is put under the microscope when he knows Dean is there, and it topples his precarious house of cards of self confidence.

He has also put himself in a position of managing Dean, coming in last episode all, alright champ how’s it going? and had a success by a country mile with getting Dean to leave his room, open up, and have some fun, and that’s not even comparing it to the same time last season when in 13x05 he completely failed at the same task. He has been working gently on Dean to help him, but he can’t when it comes to getting Dean used to having the AU peeps around and accepting Sam’s new job there, if Sam acts like it’s something to be ashamed of and is too horrified by usurping Dean to focus on letting his instincts talk and continuing to blatantly be a wonderful leader.

-

These AU peeps are also seeing their venerated war hero general just crumple into an insecure mess as soon as his brother walks into the room >.>

-

Sam gets coffee, turns into coffee!Sam (Lizbob’s on the record favourite character in the entire show), finally snaps back at Dean about how many hunters he’s keeping track of right now when Dean stops needling in a funny way and asks about Sam’s health - of course, now it’s all built up into Dean bothering Sam so instead of being a nice request, Sam snaps.

It’s possible that while Sam now runs the hunters, delegating to Mary and AUBobby and even Dean if he’ll accept it, to help keep track etc, will really benefit in the long run.

-

Slick way to work where Cas and Jack are into the same breath as where Mary and Bobby are - rugarou, which is code for off screen case - and throw it all out there as plot and ongoing character work AND the requisite where is Cas comment to keep fandom happy.

-

God, I haven’t even gotten around to what I meant to say immediately that Sam dropped down into his codependency seat at the table and Dean is unintentionally mirroring 9x13’s final scene of all the many times they’ve been around this block - off the top of my head but as someone who has been keeping a very close eye for a very long time, I can’t think of another significant instance where Sam was sitting and Dean was standing while it got heated.

Of course 9x13 was working very hard to show their divisions, while of course here Sam is just sitting in his Dean Is Upsetting Me chair and Dean’s not sitting at the table which just means not engaging with Sam on his level in a very literal as well as metaphorical way - in character, that’s a body language dissonance as well as making Sam look up at him. In staging terms, it carries the weight of years of directorial and acting decisions about how to portray the brothers in crisis that I’ve been noting in case of a pattern.

-

“Yeah, but a war isn’t hunting” good grief Sam is making their entire lives sound even worse than ever given they grew up in this and now he’s listing off all the stuff they need from the perspective of being the Bobby. I mean, when they say they were raised like soldiers, they’re adding in the fact they do zillions of almost completely unsupported 2 man raids into hostile territory with limited gear or recon. The recap at the start, showing them going in to fight the werewolves with an angel and a nephilim on their side, was an easy hunt for a reason and not just because there were 4 of them :P Without that, no matter how many hunters they accumulate, it’s always looked like a losing battle because many of these things you’d want to call the national guard on if civilians could be alerted to the danger.

-

See, Dean is acting needle-y but as soon as Sam gets an unnerving alert on his phone he’s concerned and asks who it is - remember last episode where he was like don’t know don’t care about the guy Sam was Bobbying from the car? - and when he says “maggie” … well, they’re all clearly protective of her in particular D:

-

Oh good, the body cams thing was a Sam innovation and therefore a good idea and we can pat his head for it

-

Bobby never had that and I bet he’d have LOVED to keep track of his peeps that way.

-

The other hunters meet up on the last thursday of the month to watch the highlight reel from Garth Cam, BYOB, popcorn provided

-

Nyooom

This shot should win awards for the fuckin horrifying perspective that I, as a non-mountain-dweller, can barely comprehend that it looks like the sky but then you keep on looking up and there’s trees in there. Is this something people in big countries are used to? I mean I’ve seen my share of mountains in Scotland and they’re way too cramped to fake you out like that.

You have to understand that in my town, wedged between two cliffy cliffs, the entire old town is like 500ft wide at best before more cliff. There’s only 2 directions - up and towards the sea :P  You don’t need fancy camera tricks to contain everything… I’m getting agoraphobia just looking at this. I mean I don’t think it’s intended to cause existential horror but mission accomplished.

-

Dean getting morbid talking about how having a private cemetery would be nice. I mean, they practically need one behind the Bunker after all this time, wherever the final resting place is of at least Kevin and Charlie’s bodies as well as anyone else who died in and around there who wasn’t dumped in the sewer like Ketch was :’)

During day this place isn’t half bad, with its whimsical overgrown look, the slanting fence of the bridge to cross to get there, the jungle closing in around the little plot…

But remember, Dean. Beach holiday. Eyes on the prize, man. You and the rest don’t get to hang out behind the Bunker for eternity at least until you’re all old and earned it.

-

Dean defends knowing what a walker from the Walking Dean is… in 12x15 he was playing with a Negan bat which I assume he still has somewhere, washed off and placed in the armoury :P Sam is at least being a bit more authoritative here in the sense of reeling off info as the Chief in charge of Maggie’s fate and knowing her mission etc…

Honestly this makes me feel like the dynamic of Dean drives, Sam rides shotgun can mature too, in the sense that Dean is no longer taking control from Sam - back in season 10 that was very heavily used as part of their toxic dynamic and there’s definitely shades of season 10 dynamics on the chopping block around these parts - because Sam needs all the extra time to manage his army from the road, with his hands free to check the phone and read up on everything, while Dean is free to drive and be Dean.

-

Sam being all I FAILED SHE IS DEAD at every turn and Dean being all “hey check it out, drag marks! :D” “but no blood!!! :D :D :D”

-

As a student of analaysisisign things I have no idea what was just implied by Sam and Dean being called back to the surface followed by the sound effect of spooky cold breath, a wonky focus on a statue of a bearded dude and smol cherub, and then being interrupted by a 1900s gardener.

Apron plus hat seems like Michael coding but god knows what it means.

I bet they’re actually talking to a ghost but he’s so busy just defending the ancestral land that he’s passing as a real alive person and it’s one of those completely harmless cases where the ghost just lurks around protecting the land, doesn’t go vengeful, and wards off people who hang out there… Not that he had much luck with the drunk teens.

-

1900s gardener stands outside, unable to go into the house, surveying it with a weary eye.

The garden is completely and utterly overgrown, almost like no one has gardened it for 100 years, even though there appears to be a gardener on the property.

*rubs chin*

-

1900s gardener gives them one last suspicious look before wandering back to work, significantly enough that we see it with a whole separate shot

what is his deal

why is he dressed like that

-

Does Meredith feel guilty for MURDERING JOSHUA and side note, can we really trust that it was him who got murdered. Maybe he’s in retirement dressed in an olde timey shirt and waving antique gardening implements at Sam and Dean for kicks.

-

Considering they improv’d the line about the HPS it’s very lucky that Mobby came up with that line - I guess showing how they think alike and all

-

“Just wish you’d checked in with the main office,” Sam bobs his head, like, “ME”, “before you came out here…”

Yeah, here’s the Sam and AUBobby leadership conflict I was hoping for :P

-

Mary asks for a mo and shepherds Sam out in particular, leaving AUBobby and Dean to handle the architect digest subscriber. She’s all momsy with her handling of him, and Dean and AUBobby are left to do the awkward small talk - we know AUBobby really doesn’t have it as his strong suite, even though it was Bobby’s, like in 6x21 where he was the only one to ever say sorry about your mom to the guy. It also means they have to do the blathering while trying to work out any supernatural history on the property in character, while Mary and Sam are designating themselves the ones who can get to the heart of the problem and handle it like the profession adults. I like the implicit trust/respect bond that gives here.

I mean she has it with Dean too I would think but she’s spent more time with Sam lately and it’s important now to show she’s grown such a bond with Sam, as it’s been 2 whole years of her being back before they could begin to properly bond due to various issues.

-

“It was her first solo hunt and she was nervous” listen Sam and Dean are like 1000 pounds of muscle and “fuck you apocalypse” experience and they hunt together. Maggie was smol and wore pink trousers.

-

Is. Is smol.

God. I’m turning into Sam.

-

Lol conspicuous blood transfusion bags. Nice gig, to drain peeps and get a nurse to apply the blood directly to you. Is he a vampire with an olde timey set up?

-

Maggiieeee

stealing her boots is just mean.

Does she have pink plaid as well as pink trousers?

My god how did they let her out of the house? She’s too cute and innocent for this world.

Or her previous world.

Can we shunt her along one more world to one which doesn’t have this much monster trouble even, as she’s clearly still not found the AU which suits her best.

-

Heee Dean knocking the mantelpiece and saying the house has “good bones” like he’s an expert on houses

The question is, has he watched a lot of junk reality TV about house refurbishment, or is he just faking on the fly

I have not watched enough aforementioned junk TV to call this one

-

Oh, nope, the daughter validates it by saying her grandpa used to say it. Dean has watched enough TV to pass

-

Ooooh AUBobby having a go at Sam for his shoddy leadership of letting Maggie come here when she had no idea what was up.

I’m guessing the help over text messaging may have been a bit more backseat hunting from AUBobby, but he didn’t try to STOP Maggie, or tell her to wait while he and Mary dashed up here.

In any case, here’s the conflict of leadership I’ve been waiting for since before the season began :’) Unfortunately, Sam shaved off his beard before going toe to toe with AUBobby, so he takes the first round by default of bristliness, as Sam ceded some portion of control back to Dean on Dean’s return and this has made him weird and jumpy about acting like the chief in front of his peeps, and now AUBobby’s taking the opening.

-

He has such a power stance that Bobby never had

Shoulders back, beard out

-

Dean defends Sam like when is anyone ready to hunt, because from their perspective of course they were as smol-seeming as Maggie and CONSIDERABLY younger when they were plunged into hunting. She’s a grown adult! She can handle it! (she may or may not be a mirror to Jack, who is consumptive, and therefore betraying some sort of inherent unreadiness to hunt and a requirement that the smols among you be protected rather than forced to grow up too young and go hunting as a rite of passage, just as Sam and Dean were given their first beers barely in single digits by gnarly hunters)

“A real leader would have seen that a mile away” Yeah AUBobby is too used to leading his peeps - perhaps he liked a semi retirement where Sam was the leader and the world seemed safer and they could hunt like the old days…

-

Mary mediates, splitting up the team in the only way that makes sense, hoping that Dean can defend Sam in absentia (and thus be forced to confront that Sam IS a good and thoughtful leader and to stop mocking him and start defending him) and she can comfort Sam and build him back up as the Chief.

-

Dean goes on such a face journey about this whole thing, from feeling weird about AUBobby to bad about what’s going on with Sam to just worried about Maggie and very much taking on that blame for sending a smol out into the field, especially as he has recused himself from responsibility to these people - while fairly taking a mental health break from the frontline as well as competing with how Sam already got there… Anyway that was like 18 distinct facial expressions each with a story and it’s too early in the morning… I JUST got my cup of tea and it’s still too hot to drink so Jensen’s defeated me this round

-

Sam gets comforted by another trenchcoated figure

“Don’t listen to Bobby” “maybe he’s right” shush.

“THIS IS WHAT HE WAS BORN TO DO”

ILY Mary. She’s coming in fresh on adult!Sam, she doesn’t even have the feelings about him as she does to smol scared 4 year old boy Dean, especially if we account for postpartum depression making it hard for her to bond with him as per the entire metaphorical structure of the show from episode one to present. Now she’s getting to spend time with him - and especially as her only significant time with him BEFORE this was 12x14 aka Bobo’s ode to Sam’s leadership round 1… Yeah, she sees Sam as this giant gangly admirable leader guy she happens to have birthed.

-

“Bobby can’t see that… not the only thing he’s been missing lately.”

Good grief, Mary in the trenchcoat has been making the eyes at AUBobby all Michael-hatted up and being ignored and rebuffed from her sparkling heart eyes. I wonder what this is a metaphor for, Ms Meredith Mixtape “know who you love” Glynn.

-

Also, Mary feeling comfortable to innuendo her crush on AUBobby to Sam - it really is an adult relationship and respect and emotional trust that I feel never in a million years could just pop up between her and Dean.

Oh boy, this scene is still going.

*Hides behind the secondhand embarrassment cushion* Sam goes there, like, not going to mention it but you - he sounds less bumbling than he has at other points… Sam’s awkwardness factor can shoot through the roof to the point where in 3x04 where he attacks those guys and then is like “have a nice day” when they’re not demons? I kinda want to reach through the screen and strangle him with my bare hands before he does it just to spare myself seeing it. Also the gifset of that has been on my dash all week, and it predisposes me to loathe Sam’s awkwardness. Please god let us get through this in one piece.

Mary is too busy being wistful to realise her son is an awkward bumbling moose who is all misplaced stammering words and wonky legs spinning for traction when he’s out of his depth.

-

Aww now Mary is getting to talk about her deal… She thought she had something good going with AUBobby but since they’ve been back he’s been “hunting all the time and won’t take a break not even for a second” - the ole bury yourself in hunting to avoid facing trauma or feelings thing. Of course AUBobby may be struggling with the weight of the world he left behind, the people who he couldn’t save there and not knowing what has happened to them. There’s a lot to unpack with him that hasn’t been explored on screen and a lot of it is casting him as behaving in a Dean-like way, while Mary is the “I’ll just wait here then” to his coping mechanisms.

-

“There’s something on his mind, and he doesn’t want to talk about it”

Aforementioned trauma, OR a pun about him being possessed by Michael

yeah I’m harping on it as a half-joke half-kinda want to have it on the record in case I’m right :P

-

“Bobby’s not open like your dad”

Mary, you do realise how that sounds to literally everyone else, right? We KNOW you’re practically from a 3rd AU aka the past where John was practically the mirror AU to his future self

Unfortunately, Mary is the only person in the room who ever has that particular story, which sucks for her

-

Anyway Meredith has reached some sort of characterising level with these people that I am just in pure awe of

-

“Not like your dad when I knew him”

“Bobby’s got walls. Big ones”

I do think it’s funny that Mary has essentially ended up crushing on a man who is a John-like parallel to the anti-John mirror that Bobby was, who of course had his own Karen who he was a different person with, who was a Mary mirror, and …. yeah

it’s an interdimensional timetravelling wife swap

-

It makes Destiel look straightforward

-

Part of Meredith’s skill here is not just accounting for every angle, but also juggling this nonsense

-

Anyway Mary doubting she can get through AUBobby’s walls and be the person who has to do the emotional labour to get the guy she wants - if she’s ready to put herself out there again

this is NOT a conversation to have with Dean in a million years. Even Sam takes a mo

“I shouldn’t be talking to you about this!” she giggles and she and Sam smile and set off again, all touchy feely.

Sweet.

-

Anyway there’s another dynamic in these woods.

“You think I was too hard on your brother back there.”  
“He’s doing his best. He’s doing better than his best.” Funny way to phrase it but yeah, Dean can see Sam’s levelled up and his new best is this new levels of responsibility and good leadership overall.

-

LOL at how terse that conversation was. Dean points out that Sam could do with a hand running things, makes fun of the beard, no offence, and cut back to Sam and Mary

-

Sam explains Karen to Mary, to give her an idea of what might be AUBobby’s backstory too.

“he never had any children?”  
“no”

Scuse me, that’s the line that makes me BAWL every time I watch it. HE DID SO, YOU FOOL. IT WAS YOU AND YOUR UNGRATEFUL BROTHER

I am writing a letter of complaint to the management

-

“Whatever your Bobby” - oh dear, AUBobby is now “your” Bobby, like, they found him first but he’s now Mary’s :p

Sam is now full on giving Mary relationship advice about how it’s worth it to move past those walls and give him a go if she really cares about him.

-

Has he ever had this chat with Cas, or is this just practice

-

“Cas, wait, I really appreciate you came to me with this but I am getting killer deja vu for a second here…”

-

Mary finds a disturbing firepit, Dean finds a creepy hunting cabin. This is about to be a barrel of fun

-

AUBobby… Don’t just run off. Poke Dean and POINT AT THE THING YOU’RE FOLLOWING

… Dean, also, have some awareness in your peripheral that AUBobby just legged it

-

Again, way more athletic than our Bobby was

-

That’s a human hand

-

Are those real IDs or hunter IDs

-

Oh it all came from one wallet, with the same pic on them all, so yes.

-

“Not one of ours” but part of the wider network/family nonetheless. His bearded look recalls Asa Fox, and there’s the unspoken discussion again about sharing resources, if ALL hunters shouldn’t be pulled into their network and the word spread that the Bunker is at least a resource, that Sam is there to be the hub even if they aren’t all part of the centralised AU hunter squad, and Sam starts Bobbying in earnest for this world as a whole.

Of course they’d never have sent Maggie somewhere that a seasoned hunter had already disappeared.

-

Dean finally realises AUBobby is gone, and immediately gets jumped, with rather less warning than Maggie had.

I like how the man has had time to dress up in a suit from his sick bed, if indeed that is the case

monsters in suits

-

Well that’s new

-

Well in 13x14 Meredith wrote Gog n Magog who were a fake out full of sand… Now this monster is a fake out full of ash?

-

Cut to: Old man still in his hospital bed, definitely not attacking people in the flesh

-

Oh dear, his daughter hearing something in the house while earnestly getting on with dealing with his estate makes me pretty sure she’s not in on anything and she shouted them out of the house in genuine grief-stress, which I already wasn’t particularly doubting.

-

The ole dragging chains upstairs ghost trick, which I honestly wish I could say I have never heard for myself but the ghost next door is not my problem, Victorian walls keep them contained, and honestly if you’ve been following the saga on random incidental comments on my blog I’m really only inclined to believe in ghosts for the humorous fake hysteria of a moment’s entertainment but the odd noises next door late at night really have been going on long enough and yesterday some folk moved in so, you know, first act of a horror movie setting up mere feet away from me, the disinterested neighbour scowling at all the evil poured into the walls of that house by careless landlords and human suffering I witnessed firsthand caused by it >.> Anyway. Unlike this woman I stayed right in this spot instead of wandering around trying to work out where that noise was coming from, because I’m in the house with the wacky backstory where weed dealers sawed through the support beam in the roof and the front of my room collapsed shortly after we moved in :P

-

I’m sorry, but if a ghost opens a door for you ahead of you in the hall, my advice is not to immediately go up to the door and go in

-

SUPERVAMP IN THE ATTIC

-

She does an admirable duck and cover maneouver, only to realise he hasn’t chased her. Huh.

Michael’s super vamps are super weird.

-

“You’re not crazy”   
Neil the nurse immediately straightens up and eyeballs Sam a lil harder.

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.

PS where is the ghostly gardener in all this because he wasn’t the supervamp so

-

this is like a murder mystery puzzle but all the bits are so utterly wild… Dead hunter, Maggie being drained for the “stroke” victim who is also attacking people in a suit while made of ash… supervamp in the attic who won’t follow her out of the room she found him in

I mean in all this has no one gone back up to the attic where a supervamp is apparently just LIVING?

He’s currently just chilling there while they have this conversation

he’s just, like… waiting for them????

-

Dean walks in mid-crisis  
“You hunt monsters?!”  
“oh good you told them” He does like when things are all quick and easy and right to the point.

Last episode he cheerfully told Dirk that hatchetman Jordan was coming for them, while Sam blustered over telling Sam even when the EMF was SCREAMING that there was a ghost right in the room with them and the display cases were freezing over.

With Mary’s influence at least, Sam is happy to get into telling the full story

-

“Wait time out, there’s a dead body on our property?”

THERE IS A SUPERVAMPIRE IN YOUR ATTIC

BIGGER PROBLEMS

-

Dean is entirely brushed down… Like… He must have been brushing ghost ash off of himself all the way back to the house.

-

Sam invokes 8x08 right after I was talking about Fred. Dangit, Glynn.

I feel like Sam is sort of making a jump here, but on the other hand the house isn’t under ghostly or vampiric shutdown. The father is here, unconscious, so perhaps projecting and I guess if Sam is wondering how he could be doing it, then astral projections may make sense to some degree… Working out how it all ties together is going to be another huge step though. I know the sell for this episode was partially nightmares and dreams, and we have Maggie in a djinn-like trap and the old man both a sleeping Bobby from 3x10 and also a possible Fred Jones projecting it… The supervamps are something that Dean would have brought here, and “walkers” from the Walking Dead is something the boys could have brought. Which means the other hunter could have been murdered by his own trauma… idk. Why am I trying to piece it together now?

watch the episode, lizzy

-

LOL the daughter just reeling off her dad’s “workaholic with textbook narcissistic tendencies” while also herself clearly being the offspring of such a person (is the manifestation of her dad her own trauma?) and hey no doubt that description of the father might come to bear on some of the father/power figures in the episode. Definitely not what Sam is though he’s among the mix - perhaps a dark warning of a guy who works himself to death like this and becomes entirely self-absorbed in the process, but Sam just took a minute to advise his mom’s love life so he’s hanging in there with his sense of self for now. In the sense that a dark arc doesn’t seem to be looming for him in such a way as red flags literally followed pre-Mark Dean around.

-

Okay took a LOT of me yelling at the screen but they FINALLY realised there’s an unresolved vampire in the attic situation and Sam’s going up to check

-

Meanwhile Mary has been separated out in this cursed property to have her own side-adventure with AUBobby

-

Lol the daughter downs some anti-anxiety medication with whisky while Dean sits behind her tuning his knife in a rather grim melody. What a scene.

-

He also has his foot on an armchair like the total troll he was raised as

-

She goes off on one and Dean immediately likes her

“Thanks dad” “no love lost between you two, huh?”

T stands for terrible father

-

“I get it” “not here for a heart to heart” *pause* *launches into a John Winchester Metaphor Of The Hour rant

“But my MOM” *Dean looks up, eyes all vulnerable* “Depression runs in our family” oh booooy

So she found her mom and Dean saw his mom consumed by fire in a way that is still scarring him TO THIS DAY (re: 13x01 nightmare) and this is our first Mary parallel of even a dead mom but one with a personality, and her own problems… Not the temporary insanity of drowning her children like Constance Welch in 1x01, but a woman who had depression and a husband who wasn’t there for her… In 14x01 Mary and Sam’s discussion revealed how much she was doggy paddling on the surface of all the awful that’s happened to her, but this is our real notable parallel to discuss a family history of depression running through Mary’s side of the family, which goes not just for Dean (who, like, really has anxiety himself) but also all of Mary’s issues, including in 12x21, begging Ketch to kill her at a lowest point before they got her to entirely retreat into herself.

-

Glynn still out for Dean’s blood: “the most ridiculous thing is… I worshipped him when I was a kid” Dean is feeling like she took that machete and shoved it in his stomach, as she sits there swigging whiskey and telling him how he feels. “Didn’t know any better. He’s the only family I have left.”

-

“Can I give you a little advice?……… let it go.” Oh Dean :’)

Emerging from his cocoon, still mostly trapped in there but I think that’s a bit of a wing poking through.

“The past is -” *forcefully stops himself from saying “in the past”*

He talks about it as baggage and how every single day he tries to let it go and leave the baggage behind. God he’s strong and amazing and working so hard to be the best version of himself.

-

Oh my god who builds the hall up to the attic as part of the crawlspace? This is horrifying on an unnecessary level and I’m writing into that architecture magazine to complain

-

This is the creepiest attic. Who KEEPS these horrifying mementos. Give them to a thrift shop for a hipster to buff up and turn into a conversation piece in their living room.

-

Okay, blood bags and a girl in chains (explains the clinking) are a bit weirder than average.

-

“Sam… it’s here” “What?” “It’s heeeere” Sam how long have you BEEN in this business?

File this under your panicky first aid to Stuart last episode

-

Sam got ashed just like Dean did. Hm.

It also looked like one of the crazed hunger vamps from apocalypse world more than one of michael’s supervamps maybe? It’s really hard to keep track of all these :P

-

Oh my god AUBobby has a son, who was murdered by angels. This is terrible D:

Something about the immediate moment of him wandering in… When Bobby went off earlier I was thinking of 7x11 where he saw his younger self. This approach seems almost more like 6x04 and Crowley seeing Gavin for the first time.

Anyway this is of course another way to twist AUBobby around on himself - he managed to get a son, maybe Karen wasn’t murdered by a demon, maybe he had a different wife. Whatever it is, it gives us a version of Bobby totally different from ours and also in how he will relate to Sam and Dean - not as the sons he never had, but if he’s thinking of young men in the fight…

-

Oh no AUBobby just got stabbed… Er… is this a nightmare or is he just dead?

-

Is AUBobby really going to -

OW

That’s more impressive than breaking a crypt scene mental wall to save your loved one. Then again, original flavour Bobby once stabbed himself in the gut to save Dean so I guess he takes a lot of pain for his loved ones, and honestly gathering the strength to pull a knife out… Maaaybe nicer than putting it in???

The fact this is all going down with angel blades as well.

-

I swear to god… Meredith, don’t make me watch AUBobby stab a vision of his own son to complete the loop with our Bobby stabbing Karen.

-

“I’m sorry”

*WhOMph grey ash everywhere*

Kinda takes the pure angst out of it at least :P

-

Dean gets a better look. “You’re giving him a transfusion?”

Yeah, there’s some fuckery at work here, sir. The nurse seems a lot less flustered answering this one which is almost as suspicious as someone who has been non-flustered suddenly getting flustered

-

Dean regrets saying “make me a sandwich before he is done asking. Which is the only reason I forgive that request :P Remember in 1x06 where he was bossing Sam’s friend around to get them a beer and a sandwich so they could talk in peace about shifters? God. She KNOWS about monsters it’s just that he wants to ask a sensitive question here.

Or punch the nurse in the face over the comatose form of her father.

A nod to her that it’s a ruse gets her in on it, though. Female!Dean who is a different mirror than Dirk (though still messed up by a father) gets on his wavelength.

-

AAH He remembered the djinn thing!!! Dean’s memory is so good and I love him and he’s the best and also Meredith is riffing off 2x20 which is actually illegal, I literally have that written down here in the rules and regulations. Although it does give me my opportunity to remind us all of Dean’s long speech about why does he have to be the one to save all these people to John’s grave when he was thinking he had to go unwish stuff.

-

Sadly he didn’t show up with a knife tipped in lamb’s blood so let’s see how this goes.

-

Oh my god the djinn’s literally thought Dean was Michael the whole time. I have to rewatch now >.>

Well, not now, but.

-

He thought Michael was testing him, and would be back to give him an upgrade, and now he’s waxing poetic about the untapped potential of djinn. We’re back at season 6, with the hunter compound vs a monster army, except this time the monsters aren’t a reaction to the nonsense of angels, they’re the direct work of the angel stepping into the place of Eve as the experimenter, his grace vs her black goo. I suppose the weirdness out here is the djinn flexing its muscles with projecting hallucinations.

And I guess that means it hasn’t affected Dean except the generic ghost of Mr Comatose over there (apologies to Cas) which I’d assume is part of the generic set up for killing hunters as it was what got Maggie too.

-

The question is, is that Maggie in the attic, or a nightmare for Sam. Wouldn’t she be djinned too?

-

"Because of him - because of YOU - I can bring those nightmares into the world” well that’s a weighted line >.> Dean’s guilt for saying yes,  for these things done with his face. Literally bringing nightmares into the world.

Which does at least confirm that the nightmares so far have been external and we’re not IN a dream which has been worrying me.

On the other hand that means AUBobby really did get stabbed that badly.

-

“I highly doubt you have a knife dipped in lamb’s blood” I TOLD him.

-

you can’t just kneecap the djinn

-

“I am curious, what are YOUR nightmares”

Literally pausing it because Meredith is absolutely horrible and I hate her and she keeps being mean to my boy Dean and I can’t handle this and I don’t want to know

(I am curious. What ARE his nightmares?)

-

Er excuse me did he just prod his way into finding Michael still in there

Because the other option is that Dean’s mind is so utterly scared and scary with all he’s been through he literally just out-nightmared a nightmare machine by force of personality.

-

“You don’t know my family”

Keep the one liners coming

I’m easily placated by them

-

Cut to: the next morning. He offers his double a chance to get her apology from her father, and books it.

-

Nyoooom back along a CONSIDERABLY less horrifying shot of the same sort of landscape

-

Maggie’s back! Everyone loves Maggie. She is the adorable mascot of these people.

Keep the cute pink bunny back at home maybe

Dean gives Sam some affirmation about being the leader of his people.

Now Sam needs to not fold immediately the next time he sees Dean seeing him do something leadery. Deal?

-

Mobby H/C

You know he’s vulnerable not because he has his shirt off, but because he has his hat off.

-

These “angel wars” in the AU sound pretty formal.

You know, it would probably be PRETTY HARD to get the average American to fight a war against angels until it’s way way waaay too late.

I mean, case in point: we call where they come from, “apocalypse world”

-

“Hunting” “it ends the same.” “No.” Mary F Winchester puts her foot down. No it ends bloody speeches on her watch! All she has is her optimism but damned if she won’t use it!

“I don’t know any other way to live” “Then we’ll find one”

You are doing a good job and you can save all these dumb guys from themselves.

-

DEAN TALKED TO MAGGIE. HE’S HELPING. HE WENT AND LEADERED HER FOR SAM.

Now have a beer, bro

“She learned from the best, huh? :)”

“:)”

-

Awww Mary comes up with AUBobby and they’re taking a vacation. Let AUBobby go fishing or something. Good lil Cas parallel Mary fixing her broken warrior with a Donna cabin adventure.

…

Do you not worry a lil about what is out there? Donna comes prepared with a flamethrower.

“"relaxing”“ ”“"vacation”“”

-

Anyway best reason ever given on the entire show for a set of characters not to be in the next couple of episodes, second to “Cas is taking his son out to teach him to hunt some more”

-

Bobby has a clean new formal black mourning cap to deal with fresh memories of Daniel

-

Sam getting the leadership baton from a representative of Bobby who he may see more as Bobby than perhaps he ought. AUBobby says he’s not sure he ever had it in him to be a leader, while our Bobby was the undisputed best at what he did and as much as he may have complained, his competency is what Sam is now emulating.

-

Mary being “allowed” to go by Dean. “if you need anything… ANYTHING…” *grabs his shoulder and shakes him* You’re starting to turn into the mom in a movie who leaves the kids behind and without supervision they throw a wild party to rebel against you stifling them. SO not the dynamic, but that’s the licking a thumb and pressing down a stray bit of hair type momming she’s doing all of a sudden.

“Go. Be happy.” :’)

HUGS FOR THE BOY. That’s 2 whole onscreen dean hugs this season.

-

Aww Dean talking to Garth :’)

Sam and Dean in synchronicity, talking to ALL their hunter network, not just Jody plus the AU peeps

-

Though. Sam has implemented a buddy system.

Dorky camp counsellor that he is.

-

Dean should get him a ceremonial whistle for Christmas.

-

“Move on from what I - from what we - from what he did”… Dean. Buddy.

Go lie down.

That’s some of the most intense blurring of self ever, between Dean’s guilt, whatever made the djinn scream in horror to delve his head, and his symbolic blending with Michael as the Michaelsword…

-

“Starting to feel like myself again… almost…” shakes his head and starts heading out to go watch more movies, sad that halloween is passed so no more slashers on every channel

-

“We’ll work harder” “how, you sleep 3 hours at night” “then I’ll sleep 2” *Dean gives him the NO look*

Well there’s a great representation of how their issues mess themselves up and they carve away their sense of self and their health for each other.

-

Seriously. What did the djinn SEE. What nightmares are in my boy’s head? Oh god I’m stressed.

-

What happened to the 1900s groundskeeper, Don?


	6. 14x06

Bugs 2.0

this is more like a sleepy note to self from last night (hi future me in the morning, you better have coffee) but I can’t believe Yockey is sending Jack, who is consumptive, caught in a crisis of personal identity, and sworn to kill his AUncle who is blurred dangerously with one of his fathers, WITH said father on a hunt, while Dean is so messed up about Michael and guilt and all he’s coming at the angsty nonsense from the complete other side… And that’s still like half the story because also Sam and AUCharlie and a giant fly monster or something…

Anyway last time a Yockey episode showed up I wrote 100k words of watching notes, broke down crying over the elevated Shakespearean drama, and astral projected into watching the final five-ten minutes in the Globe Theatre.

What we know so far about this episode has me legitimately terrified to the point I’m writing preemptive episode notes the night before so maybe I will fall asleep and dream in such a way I sort this all out and can come to it with Secret Dream Knowledge.

-

Mittens had the audacity to remind me that Speight directed as soon as I rolled out of bed as well

-

Oh no the recap is awful in moments. Please leave Jack alone. He is small and young and doesn’t deserve anything bad that has ever happened to him.

The ticking and chiming of this all coming due is a great way to raise blood pressure, and as I was saying last night, we get both Dean blurring with Jack in his issues as well as Dean blurring with Michael

I remain eternally optimistic that seeing Christian Keyes in the recap means he might get smuggled back into the show.

I WILL say this every time it happens and refuse to back down on that :P

Anyway, tying the two main points of plot stress together - what is wrong with Jack, and what is wrong with Dean. We KNOW what is wrong with Dean - he said yes to Michael, and got taken for a ride and sorely used. Don’t know if there’s a ticking time bomb about Dean and something Michael did to him. We can guess a few avenues of where the awful comes from for Jack, but I suspect it’s going to be at least another full episode of Rowena poking him next time to figure it out, if not an ongoing mystery so his consumptiveness can be dragged out as a point of tension.

His is so obvious that equating Dean’s tick tock clock with it is considerably more alarming on Dean’s behalf, since we have a much better visual of what’s up with Jack, and just “djinn didn’t like the inside of Dean’s head despite dealing in nightmares” to wonder about Dean.

We get the recap that Jack’s being given his hunter go ahead, but then Dean’s dismal “it’s all on me, it’s my fault” over a dark screen and even the “Now” which is a very over dramatic way to press home the sense of ongoing trauma and how that line is going to be affecting him.

Not that we haven’t seen him very visibly affected already, behaviourally, but this seems like a clock reaches the end of its countdown episode now >.>

-

ANYWAY HAVE SOME UPBEAT MUSIC AND THE KOOKY STATUE GUY

Ooh dear, here’s bandanna girl from the promo pics, but wearing……… would you fukkin believe it……………………………………… a long tan coat with large dark buttons up the front. Hilariously, I nearly mentioned when chatting about ascots yesterday morning, that ties made of ribbons were a modern equivalent you see in the same professions so maybe she is just visually connected to these sort of neck ties. Her floofy shirt and that ribbon tie has both shades of people’s fem!Cas cosplay and also the sort of faux puritan modern witch look from The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, so. I’m gonna assume whether they know it or not she’s a witch.

-

Aww she is the librarian :’)

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I love her already because she said good morning to the old person sitting by the statue, but also because she did that and therefore is emotionally completely at odds with the show and her personal theme music means she’s in for it and I already feel protective that her jaunty tune is going to get interrupted.

-

Why do I feel like at least 4 of the library rules are going to be broken

-

Aww the floofy frills go all around her shoulders. She’s so upbeat! Shelving books like it is the most thrilling and wonderful thing to be doing on this sunny morning after rain :’)

-

She looks so much like Bela when she talks… good grief… I wonder if she’s related. Anyway first jump scare is her library boyfriend because she was just so caught up in shelving.

Listen I get names wrong or ignore them constantly but for some reason I do not understand them at all so it sounded like Ambraubry to me and probably isn’t Amber or Aubrey and also how comes I understand all the other dialogue but not this??? To the point that in multiple past episodes despite my slow and steady approach to understanding an episode, I’ve completely and utterly mangled understanding or missed entirely the name introductions D:

I really am going to try and do better this episode, because it’s so awkward.

-

“Harper, are you okay?”

Adsjfhdkjsfhskjfds

-

She’s an angel. Wings, trenchcoat, tie, harp -

-

Anyway she appears to have the affections of at least two dudes, one of whom will defend her with a stapler, and we’re lucky the detective pikachu trailer came out like 2 days ago because the kid in that does it but it’s too late to be an homage.

Obviously Harper’s knight in dark plaid is brooding, gingery, and armed with a projectile weapon. *fires staples at sweater nice!guy*

“Put the stapler down”

*Dean Winchester’s it back into the safety setting*

-

“That guy’s always been creepy” See that was hilarious but now I like sweater guy better.

“He’s just overreacting because nothing ever happens here” Is this Cas defending Dean to the bitter end, even when it might literally involve watching him murder the world for his own personal angst?

-

Harper is very clearly setting boundaries while being a total sweetie about being sad no one goes to libraries or reading time. She’s almost too frighteningly well put together. No one is this well-adjusted :P

-

Aaand sweater!guy loses points for nice!guying his way into assuming he has a date

dear lord the music

-

RIP Sweater Guy.

We hardly knew ye.

-

Dear lord I love Yockey characters

And Speight directing

this is truly as unholy fun as I was fearing D:

-

Also re: something from 14x04… nice guy characters again being portrayed in this way where the old school “geek” coding (or at least, beta male who is small and wearing a sweater and such in this very old-school way which honestly I think is fashionable again or was recently… It’s a coding which comes with not just the appearance but also the attitude, and if he’d been cool and charismatic, the same costume could have done something very different). It isn’t so much the problem as the attitude… Nerds are beloved on this show, but people with gross toxic attitudes such as insisting dinner is a date and not taking no for an answer on that are going to be summarily murdered round back for hubris.

I mean the title is “optimism” and he was WILDLY over-optimistic about his chance of getting with Harper, so. I mean. If that’s the magnetism that pulls the monster in…

-

On the other side of the title card, Jack is stayin alive, and curiously pouring way too much sugar in his coffee as the title comes up - there’s an immediate irony that he may be optimistic that he is doing better and on his way to hunting with all his dads and being part of the team again and also optimistic that this much sugar will not ruin the coffee… It’s also a little worrying though I doubt he thinks this far ahead, in the sense that too much sugar is bad for you and like Dean being thrilled at the thought of bacon killing him, Jack risking the health damage from drinking sugar-coffee-sludge is an endgame beyond his current consumptive state.

See also: tragic or byronic heroes who are gonna self-destruct because they have mayfly lives in the age of consumption. Jack again being at genre odds with himself as part of an internal conflict…

“What’s with the sugar?”

“without my powers, everything tastes different, and I can’t get this how I like it”

Maybe you aren’t meant to be drinking coffee if it’s too bitter for you. I mean in your current state what is chugging red bull gonna do to kill you faster.

It’s very Cas in 9x11, commenting on being an angel again after being human. But we know Jack’s still in that state. It’s interesting because we know he has a sweet tooth because literally the first thing he ever eats is nougat and now we all call him nougat child, but I feel like with powers he was probably rather less discerning because nothing would kill him and everything was digestible… Coffee tastes bitter because it’s technically a bitter poison warning, telling us not to consume because caffeine bad… Er, yeah, sorry, coffee plants. But bitterness to humans is supposed to repel us on a “is this food safe?” level, and kids have trouble with bitter foods, and prefer sweetness and uncomplicated flavours because they’re instinctively safer.

Jack’s struggling to consume the bitter adult juice that makes the hunters run, and is dealing with it by a Sisyphean task of just adding more and more sugar to taste. It reminds me of when I was smol and wanted to drink cranberry juice because I thought it would make me more sophisticated, but it was too bitter, so I kept adding more and more water until it went from even remotely resembling juice to sort of pinkish tart water that still tasted gross and made my mouth dry and didn’t even taste like juice any more. At no point did I hit the sweet spot where it was drinkable, because I wasn’t even putting the right stuff in to make it taste better. In that case, a spoonful of sugar. In Jack’s case… dude. A splash of milk. You don’t have to drink it angsty black-like-his-soul like Dean does.

Anyway, “I can’t get it how I like it” is very telling of Jack’s current overall mindset and sense of place and all. Now he’s human but despite having chosen his family and even declared himself human before his powers were stolen, he now has no powers and is consumptive to boot, so the balance has swung way too far over from super powerful cosmic entity to sick kid who can’t keep up with the adults. No amount of sugar can change that to something he WANTS to drink when there’s still a fundamentally fatal problem with his situation. Sure the dangers of being cosmic lil nephilim on everyone’s radar is over, but as this show always does, it swings over to an ironic flip of the first problem, and he’s too weak to help.

I suppose the optimism is that he can change this scenario by pouring sugar into it - hunting with the dads - when he needs a different drink.

-

Whoops already with the dramatic irony - Jack’s excited and admiring of heroes Sam and AUCharlie (ChAUrlie?) and just assumes they’re having the time of their lives. He’s yet to solo hunt with either Sam or Dean, but he’ll tick Dean off the list today. For now, what No.1 Dad gets up to (no offence to other dads, this one just tackled Lucifer for him that one time) is mythically amazing, so probably why it’s the last on the list… if we’ll ever see it. After all, Sam and Jack had their whole season structured around their dynamic from open to close, while actual conflict and confusion remains between his dynamics with both Cas and Dean, as much more complicated, less ideal dads.

Meanwhile: Sam is discovering that it’s SUPER AWKWARD to go on a stake out with an AU version hardened by war and with like at least 5-10 years less pop culture than the Charlie you knew, loved, and got murdered by accident that one time.

Which I am totally sure is not on Yockey’s mind at all now he’s caught the Charlie ball that Buckleming threw recklessly out there.

-

Anyway. Dean not sugarcoating (haha) “he just left you here” “yeeeep.” Obviously Jack’s spent a LOT of time in the Bunker recovering and training (he’s back in his tracksuit top at least here) but Cas declared him fit for service and they even seem to have survived that hunt together. Somehow. (No slight on their competency, but it’s Cas and Jack. Come on, that was a TRIP and I’m so bitter we didn’t see it :P) So now Dean can say this in a way that makes it sound like Jack’s being left out and get his bitterness immediately on the surface, as he doesn’t really have filters.

More bitterness you can’t pour sugar over.

-

The fact that Jack is sitting with his back to Kevin’s coffee machine is the worst thing ever.

-

LOL, poor Dean. Sam deputised Jack to wait for Dean to get back from his supply run to the love cabin, because he was worried about him, which means that Dean now has his own kick from Sam which I am assuming is the spite motivator to take the boy out hunting with him, that he thinks that *Jack* now has to look after *Dean* at least emotionally.

Obviously, like. Yeah. They’re good for each other especially if they can bond some more. But like. Try telling Dean that while insisting it’s mandatory father son bonding time out of CONCERN.

*cat falling in a bathtub and freaking out and reaching supersonic speeds out the door gif*

-

Nougat Son attempts a pep talk anyway because he is good and pure of heart and adores his pop pop, even if by sheer lack of interaction or early interest he technically does rank at no.3 in the charts. Listen, Dean WOULD tackle Lucifer for you if he had to, but the story wasn’t framed in such a way that he COULD over Sam’s narrative need to tackle Lucifer for you.

-

Dean rebuffs it not out of harshness to Jack but to himself - Jack repeats the line that no one blames Dean, but Dean is like “i do”… Honestly I’m curious for the Dean n Cas version of this because Cas was there in the room and he so far hasn’t given Dean the pep talk. Mostly out of them not spending any time together, and I’m sure Dean has a lot of shame that Cas saw him do it, but for as much as Cas blatantly loves Dean still and all on first sight, does he have a more complicated view on it, given he was in the room and tried to argue Dean down?

Anyway Dean and Jack share a very knowing silence of mutual self-loathing and wow this is hilaaaaarious that that’s their mutual relationship bedrock but yeah. Last season the most bonding they did was in 13x23 when Dean was like yeah we all get horrifying nightmares kiddo.

-

*consumptive noises* *Dean’s eyes immediately shoot over to the kid*

-

“Maybe I’m allergic to sitting around doing nothing”

THERE HE IS. THERE’S MY SARCASTIC LIL NOUGAT

-

We do not get enough of him. I mean, like, maybe since 13x04? He had a rough childhood but now he is a Teen, with all the door slamming and threatening to kill dad no.3 that entails.

-

“What do you want to do?” We really are getting Dean coming towards Jack from arms’ length even now, so he sits down with him and NOW and only now he stops the pretence of being a somewhat disinterested grumpy adult talking to another angst ball adult - very 13x02 last scene kinda wary understanding but without the threat of murder - to sitting at the table with Jack (who of course is in Sam’s place) and reaches out to him with a very clear opening up of father son bonding time. I think obviously Jack has grown on him and he cares but he’s resisted overt responsibility and their connection has been tentative and weird, and as paternal as Dean can be and has been since the start of the show, with Jack only he’s been very careful about opening himself up, specifically for reasons of not wanting to get lumped with another baby to care for right when he was truly setting Sam down at last, and also for like, the whole getting Cas killed thing, and even a year and a half later, he may actually HAVE tentative paternal feelings towards Jack, but he’s very much intent on keeping himself Dad no.3, and to only open himself up when it’s necessary or else he’s emotionally ready for it.

(The description of next episode makes me pretty sure Dean is the worst person of them all to have to discover Consumptive Nougat Son issues which is why I’m assuming he’ll figure it out)

In this case, this appears to be a mutual distraction from their angst - “HUNT” Jack says, with the kind of horrifying enthusiasm of one who still doesn’t see it as nightmarish as Dean does.

-

“Cas is an insurance policy on those hunts” Awww Dean loves his hubby and thinks he’s still the biggest BAMF ever, even when Cas has, er, a patchy record lately. Though perhaps low-level monster nonsense is still within his scope…

Anyway, after the Sam n Cas nurturing Jack conspiracy (how dare they love and care for him!!!) Dean straight-talks the kid that he’s still very much on hunter probation and has been tagging along with Cas specifically for his own protection. Again, Dean never sugarcoats for Jack, but that honesty has always been a core part of their relationship, even when things were really, really, really bad. Jack still cared what Dean thought and Dean, eternally bitter from his own childhood, gave it to Jack straight, even if it would hurt. No fairytales for Jack.

Even though he has fanciful notions of sleeping beauty from his more whimsical fathers and whatever Kelly left in there :P

-

Why does Sam have a fidget spinner except that Charlie may be about to declare HIM the monster of the week and kill him.

I mean, dramatic irony and making him look goofy. And Sam is very very very hard to make look goofy because he had all his funny bones replaced with serious bones.

It is very embarrassing to watch him be a goof for this exact reason.

I suppose it is a way to make us start to sympathise with AUCharlie and start to get into HER headspace. We’re seeing Sam from an outside perspective - Jack and Dean saying admiring things about him, while looping over to Sam to show us what CHARLIE is experiencing of this. Especially as she’s spent a lot of time on the road being an independent agent, rather than sticking with the AU Peeps all the time, she’s very much a strong personality of her own as a former rebel leader, and yet knowing OUR Charlie it’s less the leading and more the rebellion that would have drawn her. Though she makes a great Queen of Moondoor, that’s her softer, nerdy side, and she very clearly had a hunter!Charlie persona of a rebel that struck out on her own, and even when she was a civilian whistleblower/hacker from within RRE, she was acting on her own initiative against the corporate enemy. With her trip to Oz she also had a similar role as AUCharlie of being perhaps a general to a higher leader such as AUBobby in Dorothy.

-

The adverts on the McCook Sentinel are for TRAVEL, retirement funds, eating healthy and a local student initiative cleaning up the park - the next generation doing their bit to make the world better.

-

Oh dear, Winston “sweater guy” Mathers - the same name as Dave Mathers in 13x06 - was bitten all over and it was probably bath salts. Case closed.

-

Now the negotiations and loopholes: Sam said we all need partners now “so we can be hunting buddies!!” Oh Jack. Alex really is good at sounding innocently purely enthusiastic with total childish glee.

-

“A: don’t call it that.”

-

Dean snarks at Jack that HE is going to back ME up? Nah kid. Mistake - this is the key to the angst floodgates. Honestly pausing just after the “I could have killed Michael when i was strong enough!!” declaration is enough info for me to accept a smash cut to Dean and Jack kitted out and on the case, guilt trip accomplished.

It’s also very familiar to Dean to have the guilt of having not done enough, to find someone else also specifically feels responsible for what Michael is off doing. And Jack’s claim to guilt lies like a whole FIVE MINUTES earlier than DEAN’S claim to guilt. If Jack had killed Michael, Dean wouldn’t have had him there to say yes to.

Check and mate.

-

Sorry, Jack is saying he was distracted and stupid so now Dean is legally obligated to take him hunting to cheer him up.

-

“You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“AND NEITHER DID YOU, BUT THAT DOESN’T MAKE IT ANY EASIER, DOES IT?”

Okay, what is the one that comes after check mate but even more vicious because Jack’s running loops around his old man.

-

Dean is making…. left over noodle… taco…..

Jack, knock him out, drag him to the impala, and start driving before he can eat it

-

He also sharply identifies hunting as the coping mechanism and how they don’t just sit around in the Bunker feeling sorry for themselves, and Dean not only can relate but he is being wildly called out by someone who has no filters and also will tell him the absolute truth about it. More than Cas, these days, who carries so much of his guilt and shame secretly so as not to burden Dean, that Jack is now the refreshing voice who cuts through all their crap and shows it for what it is.

-

Dean is like, man, I never wanted kids. Because they do this to you.

-

Thank god Jack won that argument with the final emotional appeal and we shifted over to Sam and AUCharlie’s adventure.

-

They really are not getting along.

-

Charlie just has a jar of sloppy goo. What did she get it from? How did she get so much in the jar when it’s so runny? Why does she still have it? Why did Sam put it on the dash? How comes they have Bobby’s truck?

Or do the AU Peeps have a whole collection of identical beaten up blue trucks as part of their uniform shabby hunter look?

-

It’s super weird having Charlie pull out an old book instead of a laptop. How do you do product placement????

-

Dick’s Red Rooster diner!

-

There’s a massive photo of a barn at sunset behind them. Putting them out to pasture??

-

“Yeah, when a young guy dies they never know what to put in those things.” Ouch, Dean. Spent a lifetime reading obits, he has a deep insider knowledge of the writing style of them.

The line itself in a more meta way is really sad to think about contemplating anyone having that thought to write it in the first place :( It’s deep enough that it doesn’t seem an obvious thing to occur to you unless you’re super morbid or have first hand experience with this.

Let’s just go with these writers all have to write fake obits all the time for their show(s) so they know the struggle of trying to pass off the obit as legit sounding while also contemplating what to even say about their fake people who of course they have just imagined up so don’t even know anything about them to start with.

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Cocks, everywhere.

-

(Man, I really hope there aren’t people who read these notes before/instead of the episode also hi if you do, you weird wonderful people) (the diner has a heavy red rooster theme and there’s metal cockerels all over the place)

(I assume they’re for Dick Speight)

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Oh dear, Dean is indeed going to have to be the parent who gives Jack the birds and the bees talk, because they’ve left their kid to learn what he can from TV while creating a perfect circle of Cas assuming Sam will do it, Sam assuming Dean will do it, Dean assuming it’s not his problem but it would be hilarious if Cas did it…

So of course Dean ends up being the one on the hunt with Jack where he goes down the sudden horrifying rabbit hole from explaining courting to hearing Jack say “the sex” like he’s freakin swap-meated Sam…

-

Worst case scenario: Cas has ALREADY given Jack the talk but Dean’s now going to have to fix that damage :P

-

Oh teenagers. You want them to stay disturbingly 1 day old naked manchildren forever.

-

Of course the waitress leans in like “sometimes you just have ‘the sex’”

Dean shifts uncomfortably and rotates the cock that had been staring right at his midsection away, like he’d not only clocked it earlier, thought about what it innuendoed, but now in the moment where they’re thinking about all this stuff surface text, he’s too uncomfortable to deal with cocks right now.

-

Thank god Dean is as uncomfortable as I am dealing with the concept of Jack being adult bodied and now emotionally teenaged, because he puts the conversation back on track before I actually expire of horror.

Me and Dean are mutually uncomfortable at the realisation that Jack is catching up fast with his outward age. More than halfway there, probably. Only just started bonding with the kid and now we have to let him fly the nest :P

-

Awww we’re getting the everyone loves Harper montage of townsfolk. I love one of these things.

We’re spending a LOT of time on the Dean n Jack side of things, which is making me wonder if Sam and Charlie will play catch up later, or if they really are a comic cutaway case to the real angst. That Yockey really really wanted to get our two tragic main dorks into one room alone to work through their issues of guilt and murder and stuff and Sam is too emotionally well-balanced currently to be around that.

-

I’m pretty sure one set of the townsfolk are two married women

-

Oh Harper. She’s so bubbly and she keeps losing people D: Is there a Nice Guy latched onto you?

(Is it stapler!guy? Nooo I was rooting for him. Maybe he’s innocent but will be the next victim… Or maybe not. He DID just see Winston trying to pick her up moments before he died)

-

“She’s bad luck” “real shame.”

Yeah, something wants her for itself >.>

-

Maybe Harper is the one doing the murdering and eating

Probably not.

-

Sam sits there picking his teeth and AUCharlie finally snaps and tries reaching out to him if it will make him a less annoying stakeout partner. She also does not come under the bracket of Sam’s hunter army in the sense of being inexperienced and over grateful of the rescue - that fierce Charlie spark clearly sets her aside not to treat him like the Chief in the same way of needing to be coached and looked after and she was immediately free last season to head off with main named characters like Rowena for side adventures. 

It’s interesting just because WE know better that she’s interesting and Charlie-like so obviously worth a main side character promotion, but in-universe in a practical way, on the surface there might not initially be anything to set her aside from why she gets special treatment except that she had a former leadership role and clearly more experience and innate feeling towards hunting and rebellion than the rest, compared with Maggie who clearly comes across as a refugee wanting to make a new life and learn the ropes of this world with skills she didn’t even develop growing to adulthood in the AU.

Anyway, AUCharlie’s attempts to shore Sam up end up with Sam throwing the awkwardness back on her and finally opening up the emotional heart of their story - telling her that Charlie was Dean’s old wingman and that she’d been a best friend of his (see also: they’d been going to Moondoor meets off-screen)

-

This is also hilarious that they’re using the term wingman when Cas is blatantly the “wing man” in Dean’s life and yet Sam is of course focused on Charlie when it comes to dealing with the awkwards of being in a car with AUCharlie but also this skips over Cas’s place in the order of best friendyness, because Cas is so much beyond that with his family status.

-

Anyway Sam uses “you” to refer to Charlie to AUCharlie, which is a direct comment on how they find it weird to have her around and she recoils also from the weirdness that they’d been so close to her in their universe. Their mutual discomfort with each other probably also being why she’s been happy to go off on extended adventures on her own getting to grips with this world.

“I’m just saying, I’m not surprised you survived the apocalypse”   
“Well, I am!”

Sam and AUCharlie going back and forth on his uncomfortable admiration of the other Charlie, while AUCharlie is of course having to fill the shoes of the dear departed first Charlie, a harsh copy of her to Sam’s eyes and she can feel that because of course of the weird hug when they first met, it’s clear that he, like Dean, struggles to separate her - even in a way where she’s AU Charlie but Bobby is “new bobby” which is a distinction which shows more awareness of Bobby as a clean replacement while Charlie is a murky zone where should she be treated like just having another Charlie dropped in their laps, or should she be seen clearly as a completely different person from the one she’s replacing for them?

-

Oh nooo this Charlie worked for RRE but she had a love of her life unlike our singleton Charlie. Just like AUBobby had managed to have Daniel with Karen so things were clearly easier between them than our version… It seems like Mary’s sacrifice to not have John somehow boosted the relationships of all the AU people except maybe poor old Kevin :P

-

Oh noooo what if AUCharlie goes to find this universe Cara??

-

Oh goodness actual details of the “angel wars” - a massive EMP that put Charlie out of a job just for starters.

“We banded together, thought, someone will save us! No one ever did.” Probably not a commentary on the effectiveness of the current government/world leadership at protecting us from disaster >.>

-

You made AUCharlie cry, you asshole. D:

It’s mass grief vs personal grief - the AU peeps lost their world, Sam and Dean saved their world at great personal loss. They took on every one of these deaths into their own personal angst machine, so no wonder it’s still rolling on :P

Because in the AU everyone has a Karen or a Cara - everyone who was left lost everything and everyone who was gone.

In Sam n Dean’s world, paradise world, the heroes had their own grief, but it’s a mythologised version, the great mytharc of losing Mary, Jess, etc that powered the intense personal angst of the apocalypse. But that angst which was so intensely forged in Sam and Dean for taking on the entire burden of everyone’s angst that made them the heroes who stopped the apocalypse.

And literally one episode later I’m back to Dean’s 2x20 speech about why does it have to be us who saves the world and sacrifices happy normal lives - throw “Carmen” into the Karen, Cara collection.

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“One day the water gets shut off. The next day, people are on fire.”

-

Anyway, AUCharlie is intensely hardened to the point of “it all falls apart” because of course she’s seen their world crumble.

And again, the outside view point where she’s not got the perspective that Sam is the hero that saved the world - it’s for us to remember that Sam is the reason this world hasn’t crumbled, that hunters are the secret glue holding this world together and we can correct Charlie about their world.

Going too deep is quite uncomfortable to end up comparing 2 worlds, one with a set of destined heroes who are just about holding this one together from at least supernatural threats, and one which immediately fell to pieces when the damage came. In 13x14 AUBobby said that their world just had him, again leaving that empty space that Sam and Dean fixed. But implies the everyday heroism of the AU peeps who managed to hold it together enough to rebuild communities and organise fighting back in their spaces, even heroic-minded people like Bobby and Charlie… AUBobby reckoned he didn’t have it together as much as Sam, but in our world, Bobby was a pillar who held the boys and hunting community together much of the time. And Charlie helped save the world once, yet this one felt it crumble around her.

There’s something vaguely divine right of kings going on with Sam and Dean at this point, that whole Chuck getting personally involved and calling Dean the firewall between light and dark, that puts their role in a much stranger and more cosmic position. The same thing that made Billie angrily stop pursuing the Winchesters and sit back to read Dean’s books in bafflement about how he doesn’t die every other day of the week, but is so important on the grand scheme.

To go another step beyond that into meta realms, they have a main character narrative purpose in their own world, so embedded that in the world building of a similar universe, there’s no one remotely fit for purpose to step up because no one else was narratively placed to do what they did. And that’s their tragedy that they were the people singled out by the narrative, that it’s character fights god, directly and on a meta level at times, yelling “why me” and getting “because you’re the main character, dumbass, now get back to work” as the answer.

Sam has CONSIDERABLY less interaction across the entire show with being the more meta character, as Dean has genre savvy and was the onlooker to Sam being the one in the crosshairs, that the choice was on Lucifer’s vessel to say no or yes, or crack him out of the cage or put him back in. Michael’s only purpose was to kill Lucifer, and the rest was free character development space for Dean to yell about how unfair it was that he was there and Sam was being forced this way and that to fulfill his destiny. Even in some meta episodes Sam stayed within the lines or played a role while Dean was the one critiquing and going to speak to the manager, as per the metaphor of Swan Song - 4x18 is the best example of that.

So I think Sam having to confront this here and now is really interesting that he seems considerably less challenged over time to think of himself as the centre of this narrative and what causes and effects this has caused, and to see himself from outside eyes rather than being the one trapped in the middle of it. Lucifer showed him a clip of Swan Song from outside eyes, but it’s just not been enough for Sam to really conceptualise himself in this way. Perhaps it’ll help him appreciate more what he’s done for the universe. I think 6x15 might be the only time he showed more interest than Dean, and that also was about an alternate universe and working out their effect or lack of on it. Of course it was a branch AU from OUR world, while Apocalypse AU is a branch AU from THEIR world.

“not here”

“not yet”

-

More sugar for Jack. Dean rewards him for finding a case with PIE. Not cake though there was a lot in the displays.

There’s still cocks in the background. In the old season 10 pie vs cake thing (10x12 and 10x13 and 10x15 working HARD on it) cake was the forbidden option and pie was the sexy thing that literally was used as a yonic symbol. I’m beginning to dread that Jack’s going to get the talk, if for no other reason that Dabb’s pre-episode tweets of Jack as Fabio on romance novel covers, but the previous conversation sure didn’t help. We’re visually and show-language primed for Some Nonsense.

-

Oh Christ Jack starts asking about courting, and he says he’s never experienced it “unless what you said about Rowena and Gabriel counts”

This dumb lump of nougat has witnessed one of the most ridiculous chapters of Dean n Cas angst and hasn’t got a clue.

“No, definitely doesn’t count.”

He never saw them together, but he would have been there when they broke the news to Rowena I guess. Maybe had some innocent questions then too.

Maybe was advised not to touch the books on that side of the library until someone hosed them down with holy oil.

-

I’ve been avoiding watching more for like. 2-3 hours. I mean I’ve been dipping in and out but the mere prospect of this conversation has had me noping out for extended chunks of time to knit and stare into the void and I just realised it’s 9am and I started at 5 and only some of that was typing.

My second hand embarrassment squick is barely able to cope with this concept. Now I’m IN this scene I’ve watched all of Rachel Maddow and nearly checked my dash before I remembered I’m avoiding watching the new episode because Dean has to give Jack the talk so I still have an unwatched episode and spoilers to avoid.

I’m ranking this episode right up there with my conceptual horror at 11x04 just for the prospect of Jack and sex in the same sentence.

-

Oh thank GOD “when we get back I promise I’ll give you the Talk” I should have pressed play so much sooner.

(No, you’re fooling yourself Lizzy. This concept doesn’t just come up in the first quarter of an episode and then go away)

-

Oh. Oh Dear. Yeah, trying to do a trust fall with the rest of the scene just meant I walked right in to Dean proposing, I think, using this strapping young lad he has with him as bait to investigate Harper, by sending him to meet cute with her. You know, Jack, dressed in his tan coat, Harper now dressed with her red bandanna ascoting around her throat and a black shirt so she’s more Dean-like.

Bless, Jack’s all grown up, he’s in a Destiel parallel :’)

-

A Ploy! Father Son roleplay! Dean plays the horrible looming FBI man who is threatening a smol lady with only a book for protection to interview her aggressively… And in steps the hero, in his red shirt and still tan coat of course, primed for young love and a hunger for local history books! :P

Well at least maybe stapler!guy might be protected by this if he’s not the monster :P

-

Dean has watched enough rom coms/read enough romance novels to know how to set this up even if Jack doesn’t. Canon.

-

Put that nasty FBI man in his place! Bam! Jack’s getting another one in over Dean in the roleplay which mirrors their starting conversation of him emotionally triple-checkmating Dean over letting him come.

It is also a position of trust to let him do the work to chat up Harper.

-

Gosh I am curious about the endgame of where the Jack vs Dean conflict goes. Jack was literally yelling at Cas that they might have to murder Dean to get Michael a few weeks ago. There’s shit going on here and the self-aware staged conflict really makes a curious sort of play within a play aspect, where it mirrors the dynamic. Set a play to catch the conscience of the king.

In this case, Dean being overbearing and threatening to a young woman mirrors Kaia and his treatment of both versions of her, but this time someone is here to step in and stop him, when Jack has been a bystander in the past. And in 13x09 of course, when they first met Kaia, Jack was being really grabby and possessive of her, and she had to beat him off and when Sam and Dean caught up with Jack, Dean immediately said “Good!” about Kaia hitting him, because Jack really was overstepping lines and was wavering one way and the other about being a Joffrey.

Jack is again playing the hero - he’s been the prince to sleeping beauty and now he’s the Fabio to this love-challenged cursed town darling. This is about perceptions and surface levels - playing the games of being the hero while still working out his own place in the world and discovering that heroism can sometimes mean a murderous revenge quest against the AUncle and the high collateral damage of achieving that. Despite Jack’s full on tragic narrative he’s battling it hard to dabble in other more light-hearted genres, and join his dads who have all survived by travelling between genre lines and becoming action heroes instead of tragic heroes.

And why is Dean now the possessive and grabby one when he was possessed and grabbed? Or is he still the one who did the grabbing? He CAN’T be Just Michael for all this time, but what’s the secret Michael has set up? We can’t know it yet but there must be clues, and more we’ll work out when we know and can look back on these episodes with hindsight…

But Dean also was presumably the one to come up with the ploy so is it HIS play, and we’re getting the boy king (v.2) conscience caught here?

“Why don’t you back off kid?”

“You back off… Old man” Jack suddenly sounds threatening enough that Dean recoils, having never been on that end of Jack’s terrifying switch Alex can make to being a truly frightening presence, at least not when Jack wasn’t naked and lashing out dumbly because he was literally hours old. Jack’s never threatened Dean with intent because why would he.

Dean’s caught off guard and makes a genuinely “uh” noise in his throat while recovering from the threat, but it impresses Harper so I suppose that’s what matters.

Dean vs Jack is very much the Dean and John version of this whole thing, except Dean tried to launch himself to Mars rather than parent Jack and give him the same experience… While accidentally doing stuff like handing Jack a shovel and dismissively telling him to dig which had the exact same effect of being raised as he was. Because like it or not, by 13x02, Jack was mimicking Dean and idolised him a little all along. And now of course, with Daniel laying into Bobby and probably a bunch of other stuff I can’t recall mid sentence, we’re deep into confronting father figure territory, with John’s ghost looming over them all.  

-

“This isn’t over” after a moment of comical blustering, the squint Dean gives Jack is almost imperceptible but there’s a bit of confusion/curiosity there about just where Jack’s assertiveness came from, because DEAN didn’t teach him to disrespect authority like that (he totally got it from you Dean). The warning is of course nice and meta in the sense that this staged conflict probably is over, but the Dean vs Jack stuff is only just kicking off.

-

Jack… Smith.

Aw hon.

Still no surname then? Not Kline or Winchester or… whatever Cas’s surname is.

-

“Dean what do you mean you don’t know Jack’s surname? It’s the same as mine!”  
Dean stares blankly at Cas.   
Cas squints at Dean.  
Dean slowly, slowly, sinks to the floor and crab-walks backwards out of the room.

-

Anyway awwwwwww romance hero Jack! You play those genres! Find the one where you don’t have to be consumptive and murderous!

-

Aha, Stapler Guy is probably called Miles, since Dean is getting perfect audio on this conversation from the car.

Jack is the politest nougat ever, and wants to shake hands with everyone. SOMEONE raised him right. Probably Kelly. I can’t even begin to imagine where else he gets it so it must be an instinct she hammered into him from the womb.

Anyway as soon as another guy leaves to get coffee with Harper, Miles comes shooting out of the library to ask what’s up, so he’s looking more and more like the monster. Grabbiness as the motw!

-

Oooh she’s taking Jack to her apartment to get him a book. Oh dear, Jack, this is what Dean did in 9x08.

Be careful, sweetie. No one’s given you the Talk yet D:

-

“You don’t even know this guy!”  
“Miles, stop it!”

Yeah, staples guy is definitely my no.1 suspect.

-

Oh.

Is staples guy about to be eaten?

-

Whoops, me and Dean both made the wrong call there. And I was just about to tell Dean he should have been following him in case he was the monster, which would have at least saved him.

-

Apparently just crushing on Harper is dangerous enough. Though Staples Guy crushed hard enough to be a threat. Which means, I would guess, that the MotW feeds on toxic masculinity.

-

Oh my GOD Sam is still stuck in the truck with AUCharlie.

-

“Who wants to be a hunter? Just a lot of tears and death.” Yeah, our Charlie got into it with only personal sacrifice of broken arms in exchange for a bunch of thrill-seeking adventure. Until she died, of course. AUCharlie is what you get when Charlie has a tragic backstory involving monsters. I think she must still be hunting for the same principle Charlie had on our first meeting, of what sort of douchebag doesn’t help when monsters are eating people in your very building you work… But at the same time, AUCharlie has none of the sunshine, because it was already all taken from her, and she never started hunting to save people, only to fight angels and survive. I suppose the only difference in this world is that now there’s no angels to fight, she’s outcast from society by default and  has ended up with the same asocial vigilante skills from guerrilla warfare as hunters use day by day for their less world ends stakes job.

-

Sam says “you” and then corrects to “our Charlie” - I can’t remember exactly when this was but I think it was 10x18, after Charlie had been through enough that she was starting to lose the shine and Robbie knew he was writing a Charlie who was about to be chewed up and devoured by the story. By Sam’s man pain in the story.

This is a baton that Yockey is having to take very seriously and carefully, because of course AUCharlie is so different but the meta perspective on bringing her back is very much about replacement and loss of a fave and facing what the story did to Charlie and for what stakes, vs what was she brought back for and can just shoving a new different Charlie into the story actually make up for doing what they did to her.

-

“So glad this is my last case” aw no she’s retiring to the beach. Has she just been working with them while she gets enough resources to start over?

She’s going “away” - from monsters and people. Go live on a mountaintop or something. Again, this is more about the trauma she’s been through and how she copes, and what she needs to do to settle herself.

(PS: I will weep openly if the last shot of this is Charlie outside a cupcake shop)

I don’t think this means she’s necessarily out of the story or that through this van conversation bottle episode, Sam might not convince her to at least just take a break like Mobby are doing, but she’s clearly there in the collection with them and Dean of people who have been so badly hurt that they need to retreat from the hunting frontlines. Dean NEEDED to watch 2 weeks worth of horror movies and take it easy. He’s not exactly describing himself as really ready for action now either. Charlie may end up a mirror that’s a fair bit darker, because while AUBobby is full of grief and self-destruction, it’s open and explosive, while she’s cold and retreating and surrounded by people who see the wrong person when they look at her - the bubbly fun Charlie we used to know. In the same way, if Dean has changed, people look at him and see the Dean THEY used to know and expect things of him he’s sometimes not ready to offer. He made a big step in letting Sam take charge of the operation, in the sense of acknowledging himself under Sam’s direction.

It’s interesting now that both AUBobby and Charlie lost romantic loved ones, when we saw Dean change so dramatically in season 13 without Cas and that being the beginning of Sam’s tentative need to take control and start to be right about his hunches like nurturing Jack. The swap in the roles and Sam struggling to understand Dean, and in 13x05 - the Yockey episode - failing so desperately to help Dean on his chosen cheer up hunt compared to acing it the same time next year.

-

LOL Harper’s house has “AMOUR” and a huge love heart on the wall. This poor romantic sap. I’m so sorry a monster is eating all your prospective boyfriends.

She has stuffed toys on her bed and so many shelves of books. I love her. She’s the best. Protect her, please, Jack.

-

His “??” over the “moves” also is a great way to make her way more the flustered one, because Jack could be way more awkward with inexperience except he’s literally transcended it, as Cas often does, back out the other side of obliviousness :’)

-

He leaps into action to prepare to test her for monstery things :’) He’s been trained well!!

-

On the other hand it does look like he now has REALLLLLLLY sweaty hands after covering them in holy water.

-

Oh christ, Jack, this is why we don’t do Christo any more. Also. You shouldn’t be aggravating your cough. You could really set yourself off.

-

“I’m just nervous”

Harper goes through the correct range of emotions for how adorable Jack is.

Charlie’s “I got something” is layered over Jack being invited to sit with her - both of them just got a break on the case, though for Jack it is being prey for the boyfriend eater, and Charlie has read enough books.

-

Muscas look horrifying. I love the 17th century illustration of one.

-

Awww AUCharlie calling him a nerd. Those awful flashes of her being the Charlie they once knew.

-

LOLLLLL the Musca has a “bad egg” who FAILS TO FIND A MATE and goes bad, and starts killing people to nest. So we’re really roasting beta males who fall into the woe is me victimisation trap of incels and would rather kill people (literally, unfortunately, in some cases) than address their own issues, get help, and find some peace and probably, honestly, a girlfriend as soon as they stop behaving like that and learn to see women as people, not mating-prey >.>

Why do I feel like whatever has latched onto Harper is going to have a suspiciously similar motivation where it’s picking off men in order to leave her single…

-

Not that I have the best judgement on her case, but it’s B L A T A N T L Y about courting.

-

And these guys are courting her - lots of innocent courtly gestures like dinner dates, protecting her nobly with a stapler, fighting off the nasty FBI man… She’s their damsel.

-

“Our perp might just be a giant fly with low self-esteem” Don’t sugar coat it Sam.

-

Is this episode “wow look at this hetero bullshit by Steve Yockey”

-

AHAHAH THE GIANT FLY IS MANSPREADING AT THE BUS SHELTER

It also has ribbons at the front of its cloak. The design is both modern with the suit and boots, but with enough of that old 17th century twist to give it a nice spooky old fashioned uncanniness. it’s not of this time, place, world, etc…

-

Awww Harper has a halo with the lamp!

-

Oh Jack no, I told you not to aggravate the cough.

-

Vance… probable monster. (I say that a lot but we’re past the elimination round)

She didn’t want to leave town… we could see the world in books!

You are also adorable and not quite of this town or modern world. Her “sappiness” does make her a weirdly good match for Jack, though, just because of the pure-heartedness they exude.

-

Jack can not IMAGINE someone leaving Harper behind.

-

“That was the beginning of my bad luck” Fancy that.

Also you still keep a photo of your ex in your apartment.

That’s weird, hon.

-

Oh dear, now Jack’s opening up. “I try to stay optimistic.” “Me too.”

Awww sweetie. for all the bad that’s happened he keeps on powering through, because sometimes that can be powered by optimism for a happy ending

Unfortunately, we’re in irony town where the grimmer you are about your fate the more chance you have of surviving just to spite that. And, you know, vice versa, it gives you consumption just to make it harder… like, how much can we throw at this kid before he stops?

-

“Do you believe in love in first sight?”  
“Harper….. do you mind if I use your bathroom?”

Unlike 9x08, Jack is rather less distracted by being adorably hit on by the sweetest romantic. Time to flee.

-

Dean has been standing awkwardly at the corpse this entire time.

-

The bathroom has dragonflies all over it which I assume are interesting symbolically in a way which relates to her love struggles. Also the other side of the story’s bug struggles.

-

“Harper is not a monster. And i’m 99% sure she’s in love with me.”

-

“She was looking at me with these googly eyes”

This is like, warning for next time Cas and Dean are in the same room because you SAW them last time

Next time, you will be prepared.

-

Dean is convinced she couldn’t be in love with him so instantly. What do YOU know about love, Dean?

-

“But if she is I need to know everything about sex. Go:”

Kid, there isn’t time in the world to tell you everything Dean knows about sex. Also, are you really going to pull a Dean and hook up despite all the deaths in town? ALSO dude, courting. Court her first. You know NOTHING about this or what you’re feeling.

-

Teenagers are the worst.

-

Ooops Dean just stood around talking and now he’s been eaten.

Guess it’s time for Jack to SAVE HIM

-

“You’re fine. I’m fine.” No you aren’t Jack, stop kidding yourself.

-

Oh good, she’s scaling back to saying they should get coffee.

This is sensible and take notes, Jack, but also disregard this offer of a date entirely and go save your dad, you’re not in a romance novel.

-

“I… don’t know” this was Jack’s stock response when he was younger to encountering new things about himself and deep philosophical questions which he just had not had time to ponder but in the world he had been thrust into, he was being asked to immediately have an opinion on.

I think we ought to file courting and sex under those headings for now :P He will figure it out but not at this breakneck speed, no matter how fast he grew up.

-

Bam, Dean bursts in on them - is there remotely time for him to have done this fast enough? Is this really Dean? Are we supposed to be doubting who Dean is?

-

Vance has literally come back from the dead to bother her about having new boyfriends. Great.

-

Oh, okay, this looks pretty cut and dry that it’s a zombie now he’s in the room :P

-

he looks like Archie Andrews. Is this the crossover we’ve been waiting for?

-

“Archie! Hey!”

oops.

*puts another penny in the “quoted Dean before he said the line” jar*

-

I can’t believe Dean watches Riverdale.

-

I mean, yeah he grew up reading the comics, but you know it’s on his netflix queue.

-

Stop smashing up Harper’s bookshelves! Dean’s all “let’s dance,” still looking waaay too excited to get to wrestle monsters to take his mind off of all his angst.

-

Why are Sam and Charlie still sitting in the truck instead of following their weirdo fly? 

-

“You can’t just quit and go live on a mountain somewhere”

Somehow when he sits in cars with female characters in Yockey episodes he ends up saying a lot of things like this. Bless your heart, you just described my whole life.

-

“People need people.” “We’re social animals” Sam is finally starting to realise that maaaybe that bit in 8x10 where he and Dean removed everyone they cared about from their lives and sat gloomily in silence anger-eating chilli in a dank cabin in the backwoods was PERHAPS not the best way to be people.

He’s really starting to like having a squad around him… Maybe this is awakening a bit of Sam that he never had except in college when he got to have people around him without too much fear about having to leave them behind because he was so determined to stick to his new life there.

-

Sam pulls that not only he tried and failed to quit hunting, but our Charlie did too.

“She ain’t me!” but you are still cut from the same cloth whether you like it or not.

“It’s my life, Sam! not hers and not yours” basically no one else can tell me whether I should be here or not, and it’s on my terms if i am or not. Which is very healthy but kind of sad about the commentary on having a Charlie on the show if she’s so insistent to escape hunting. Because it killed our Charlie so we should want AUCharlie to be safe. But at the same time, bringing her back then sending her off to a mountain… it’s a cold comfort that a version of her survived, that they saw her face again before she left in slightly better terms. But what does it bring to the show to have had her back but then to let her go again?

And, on a character level, can Boss Sam wrangle a great asset and potential amazing friend to stay and work with them and be a key part of his hunter squad, or will he have to let her go and fail to achieve some networking people skills.

-

They have a funny friend potential moment as sam says we don’t want to tackle him in case it’s a guy into weird fashion and she’s all, don’t we?

-

This hesitation was enough for that poor guy to get grabbed under cover of the bus.

Though perhaps the hesitation was also timed to stop Sam and AUCharlie getting mowed down by a bus and very disappointingly ending both their careers.

-

Harper stops and demands to know what’s happening. Jack throws aside the book that was the ruse, and holds out his hand for trust with open honesty now and she takes it, and he continues to pull her away to protect her. Awwwww.

-

Has Dean been wrestling in her apartment since it got dark?

How has no one called the cops.

-

Vance gets a spidey sense tingle that someone is holding Harper’s hand, and marches out of the apartment, to Dean’s disappointment that he didn’t get to smash a chair over his head. Because that was a totally normal amount of enthusiasm for a fight.

-

Jack is clever, Harper is snarky… aw :P

-

I can’t believe Sam and Charlie can walk after sitting all day.

-

“Brass nail dipped in sugar water” lol flies are drawn to sugar. More flies with honey than vinegar.

If you creatively mock that up using American beverages I will be horrified that corn syrup counts as sugar. Charlie literally just reminded us of Dick Roman taking advantage of your industry’s corn fetish

-

BUGS

-

Those who don’t learn from history etc

-

I don’t think that’s enough fly papers

-

Sam just sniffed a chloroform rag. Er.

-

Oh that is disgusting. Why weren’t you wearing the orange jacket so we could ritually burn it.

-

Oooh gross. (pt.2 - Yockey was only warming us up with bug juice)

Harper let the zombie in and now she’s kissing him? She better be mind controlled or this is a whole level of weird Jack should not have had to deal with because no one should start the Talk at necrophilia and work backwards from there D:

-

Oh NO this is going to be the Talk Dean has to give Jack, and to top it off they have a jealous boyfriend stalking roleplay kink, AND she threw in a bunch of other things for Jack to ask questions about >.>

-

Told you she was a witch. It was the Sabrina-like collar that gave it away.

Who knew my dorkiest joke about my suspicions was the most accurate.

She’s even wearing a red jacket, just like Sabrina has her signature red coats.

-

This is a CW cross-promotion episode.

-

“It’s first love, Jack. The best kind. Without baggage or compromise. I mean. I did have to kill him to keep him here after college…”

She’s a Mary mirror. This is Mary and young!John. Oh god. Azazel’s deal is her raising the dead, and sharing a gross kiss to boot… And Harper is from a long line of necromancers and Mary was from a long line of hunters, the last of them…

Of course, Mary has all that baggage from her first love but has moved on and is now having a happy vacation with Bobby but I don’t think it’s symbolically unimportant that that was literally last episode and now we’re seeing first loves with an undead boyfriend, that Harper couldn’t let slip out of her hands so she did the most toxic thing to bring him back. It’s very much like the Plum sisters being the zombie-raising parallels to Sam and Dean and their need to bring Mary back come what may - which of course after Jack’s vision in 13x09 made Dean threaten Kaia in the first place

-

Can’t spell Necromancer without “Romance”

-

I love the hiding from the zombie chase going on here. Vance is dumb as a box of rocks and we’re getting lots of new gifs of Jack being “sneaky”

-

Ahaha she has a romance novel called “Lances and Laces” (i think?)

-

Awww Jack is doing a Ruse again, playing dumb for her. “I thought we fell in love at first sight!”

-

Awwwwww he’s proposing to her. The allure of un-undead love.

-

“But I tried to kill you!”  
“Every relationship has its stuff, right?”

pffffffffffffffft

You aren’t officially in love on this show UNTIL you try and kill each other

-

Ow, Jack. That’s going to shake some bloody phlegm loose.

-

FATHER SON TEAMWORK SAVES THE DAY

-

Lol, Vance got ditched as soon as it was awkward to have a zombie boyfriend

-

Sam is seriously using the fly as a parallel to Charlie being a loner. I wonder what you could put in front of him that he WOULDN’T be able to twist into a moral. He really is the camp leader :P

-

Awww the gross bug thing’s people came for it

-

Sam I can not hear a word of your motivating speech over these terrifying things and their nightmare aesthetic taking home one of their own who strayed from the swarm to swooping music.

-

AUCharlie relents enough to have a door open… Yeah, she did also get knocked out when trying to hunt on her own and though she wanted to retire, well…

-

I can’t believe Yockey metaphorically compared the hunter community to the fly swarm. Like, Charlie was all blurr the metaphor has holes but they had no idea the bugs looked after their own like that D: Dramatic irony again - this time against Charlie to make her more right than she knew that she has people who would care for her.

-

Oh NO, Jack has left an impression on Harper… Oh dear oh dear oh dear. You can NOT have a necromancer long distance girlfriend.

-

Even though she’s in a different diner there’s still a cock in the window.

-

“I’m sorry I have to kill you!” heee she’s so cute. In a very twisted way, I still like her even though the necromancy thing is gross, and Jack should steer WAY clear.

But awwwwwwwww.

-

“And that’s love.”

Dean saying it can get crazier than that… Dude, just give him the talk, I’ll turn off the last 2 minutes of the episode. You clearly need to. Or at the very least start the ball rolling on suggesting Sam do it, Sam asks Cas if he’d want to, Cas comes and asks you for help to do it and you end up being the one to try after all.

-

I LOVE Jack hanging with Dean, with his too-sweet coffee, angling to make Dean let him come on hunts more because he was right.

-

I think Dean just pointed out neither of them are ready to be hunters if they can’t cope with the mistakes they make without feeling super guilty, since they had the guilt Olympics at the beginning.

-

Oh Jack, no.

-

OH NO HIS NOSE IS BLEEDING

-

Down he goes!

-

This is what happens when you meddle in genres you don’t belong.

Tragedy comes back and kicks you in the face.

-

Dean on his knees by Jack yelling his name: same. D:


	7. 14x07

In Which It Is Now Completely Apparent Which Of Buck And Leming Are Writing A Scene At Any Given Time

or

A Tale Of Lizbob Being Tormented By Toddlers

* * *

Hello it is 3:32am and I am awake from a dream of what the episode might have been (plus side: overt Destiel motel room sharing, downside: Jack accidentally killed Dean) because my tantruming toddler neighbour who just moved into the haunted house next door was screaming, and threw something at our adjoining wall. At 3am. So I’m not exactly well-rested and I’m kinda pissed, which isn’t the best combo for a Buckleming episode, but when you wake up with a scream and a thump, you aren’t going back to sleep for a lil while :P

-

Kudos to the rest of the writing team, we’re 7 episodes in and I’ve thoroughly forgotten Nick exists. I’ve just been assuming he was caught, featured on a true crime program, and is already gone and locked up for the new murder and likely solving of a cold case.

-

Ahahahaaaa the opening of the recap is “when it comes to killing you, I’ll be the one to do it” so that’s ominous. As you might tell, my psyche is utterly wrapped around this whole Shakespearean tragedy of Jack vs Dean, and perhaps they’re not gonna murder each other today but the constant reminders they’re living in a murder or get murdered delicate thematic plot balance is exactly the sort of thing that we need to have hanging over their dynamic, as well of course as being the start point of their relationship to show how far they’ve come and how much they’ve changed and now love each other and how just last episode Dean got in his “fine i have a son now” episode a season or two later than everyone else and just in time for it to be “so now you bonded with him of course he’s caught Doom because you can’t have nice things for literally a single episode and this is your fault for bonding with him, Dean”

-

This recap is designed to wound me, a Jack fan and lover of how TFW loves their son

-

Ew, it’s Nick. The first time in my life I’ve been tempted to skip at least a lil of the recap.

-

Imagine how tight it would have been to just do a 10 second “here’s Jack” recap and cut to the action

-

and the action includes an episode without Nick stealing time from the boy

-

You know i spend exactly 0 time speculating on how Eugenie might write her personal fave bits of the episodes but if you had to throw together “nick is now a serial killer ritually murdering priests on a satanic bender” then that would have been a pretty close thing to what I could have come up with as distilled Buckleming essence. (gross)

There’s a vague continued overlap of the human!Cas arc with the parallel to the open of 9x03 and the general aesthetic of season 11’s Lucifer’s satanic rampage bender thrown together but you know what that’s more meta than this arc deserves and my boy is sick

-

OH NO CAS IS THE ONE WATCHING OVER HIM ABORT ABORT

-

His grace looks pathetic. Maybe he’s trying not to wake Jack up. Maybe he doesn’t have a whole lot left.

-

That’s not helping, Cas

-

ANXIOUS PARENTS OUTSIDE HIS ROOM

I bet Cas sent them away because they were hovering

-

Dean this is not what happens to kids, stop trying to kid yourself that this is like having a regular demonic toddler

-

Man am I glad I do not have kids right now both because I don’t have to worry about them and also because they scream and throw stuff at the walls at 3am

-

Dean angry at Cas cuz he’s worried about Jack oh no oh no oh no look at these stressed parents. Cas is forced into the doctor role because he magic but he is just as stressed as they are and tensions are high, and then the boy starts convulsing

-

Oh my god they snapped, they are actually bringing Jack to an emergency room. This is horrifying and kind of a trip to imagine what they’re going to tell any authority figures about who this guy is and what their relationship is to him.

Do they remember that he has barcode fingerprints and probably is gonna be Medically Weird just as default?

(Alex is 29 like me and Misha is early 40s and Jimmy is canonically a year older than Misha for some reason, so at a push Cas could be his dad and have made some very early mistakes but the boy is biologically only like 10 years younger than them on average… JACK looks another half that at times but this is a hospital so idk if “smiles like a toddler” “early teenage adorableness” is a good measure of age)

-

(I’m stress-typing)

-

“His full name, please”

All 3 dads look at each other baffled.

Sam goes with Jack Kline, which, a season and a bit later, is the first canonical use of it as Jack’s surname

They’re cautious about using Winchester, understandably, but it’s a nice reminder that Kelly is family too and as the dead parent, naming Jack in tribute to her should have been something they were doing all along (like, season 13 all along), especially as he even visited the Klines earlier this season. Sam being the one who thinks to do this is nice because he’s the most dad-aligned to Jack in a traditional sense when it’s come to raising him (Cas got the pre-birth role as the traditional father role) and Cas obviously had the strongest connection to Kelly before that but this isn’t a moment about her so much as these 3 stressed dads.

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LOL Date of birth. Sam wins another point for knowing it, while Dean makes back and forth guesses on ‘99/2000, making Jack 19 or 20, which would at least mean any one of them could have fathered him and chopping 10 years off Alex’s age to compromise between look and feel.

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Given Jack’s symptoms the nurse should have been a lil more concerned asking about trips to West Africa or other likely Ebola places lately. (This may be poor timing on the show’s part but isn’t there a fresh outbreak right now?)

(Oof I googled it and there’s “Congo Ebola outbreak 2nd worst in history” articles dated 6 hours ago… Maybe a bad year to write haemorraghic diseases for fun and also how comes no one is talking about this in the news and it’s all blah blah brexit… Have we just stopped fearing it now a few outbreaks have shown it mostly stays contained in African countries so now they can just suffer it on their own? I’m making a 4am donation to relief efforts)

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*returns from the doctors without borders website* anyway back to the fictional sick white boy

-

And his very stressed dads

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I have no idea how much of this is medically accurate but I feel like this is particularly dramatised to match hospital visits people have experienced which did not involve bringing in a stumbling, feverish, person who is having seizures and coughing blood

it’s still objectively sad to see TFW lined up all stressed out and Cas and Dean holding hands while they stare through the giant window

-

The doctors aren’t wearing masks even though he has been COUGHING BLOOD

-

sheesh this entire hospital is in quarantine now

-

Nick saying he was “getting hammered” the night of the murder isn’t super subtle

-

Cas aggressively still trying to watch over Jack even though they won’t let him in the room. Dean paces and talks about ghouls in the middle of the hospital to let off stress.

-

Cas goes to watch over him in person while Sam and Dean have a personal chat. This is awful D:

-

I appreciate the sentiment of busting Jack out before they pay the hospital bills because they’re running out of medical options and need to turn to magic ones, a la every dramatic event ever in their lives except that one time Dean broke his leg and Sam was too out of it with the Hallucifers to sell his soul to make it better, but if Jack’s in system shutdown wouldn’t at least keeping him with state of the art equipment mean things like transfusion and machines that keep him propped up?

Mind you his bloodtype is probably, like, X evil negative or something Bucklemingy

It’s in his DNA… He might be cute but he’s still  born of their episodes and wacky non con ideas… It was gonna catch up to him eventually D: You can’t outrun it forever!!

-

I accidentally hit a button and 8x02 started playing on VLC

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“DEEEAN” Cas shoves him through the portal out of purgatory, credits roll, this was officially the weirdest episode ever.

(No I didn’t watch the whole thing, I was literally paused on the last shot from where I was about to gif it last night when I fell asleep)

-

Sam already called Rowena… Smart cookie

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obligatory yell at Cas shedding the coat to put on Jack so they don’t walk him out in a hospital gown

-

Oh my god Jack’s so sick he’s white as a sheet and being carried out by 2 of his dads and he still has a lil well of snark to be like “fine we’re leaving” to the doctor.

“There’s just no talking to him when he gets like this”

-

We’re at the promo scene and I’m still not 100% sure after sleeping on it that Rowena definitely did not have the Book of the Damned, and that she hadn’t been able to make off with it at the end of season 11, never for it to be seen again, because she was very much in the process of stealing the Black Grimoire in 13x22, but this does, I guess, make sense in regards to which book would serve Jack better, and Mittens tried her best to convince me that Rowena plausibly did not have it because the Winchesters did… I’m still suspicious because I really did just assume that she took it and the implication was we didn’t see it because SHE had hidden it, and from a line in a Buckleming episode as well. And either way around her showing up with it makes sense that she had it but I’d have occam’s razor’d it that she stole the obvious books at the obvious times and not that 13x22 became a BotD heist on top of everything else :P

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Jack is up and about!!

He’s using a more gravelly voice and it’s actually a really hot voice and for literally the first time the Alex/Jack divide (gulf) in my head that one is my age and hot and the other is a 12 year old is a bit shaken. I mean Jack’s canonically now supposed to be around 19-20? Which explains why he has a “wooo spring break” attitude when we see in the promo he snaps and wants to go to Vegas.

They grow up so fast.

Anyway considering he was in total organ shutdown a lil while ago it seems a night’s rest has done him well if he’s wandering around the bunker

Can’t tell if we swapped writers or what… well, it seems like it’s possible given Jack’s fluctuating sickness, which of course could just be a plot thing but also a mark of the inconsistencies in Buckleming episodes. It’s still odd to me that in the filming process it didn’t occur to them that Jack might not at least sway on the spot at little, but he’s really standing there like a little trooper, upright and talking confidently.

-

And betraying to Rowena that his dads like her and say nice things about her behind her back, which is catastrophic for them. How dare. You’re damaging the foundations of their relationship.

-

*cough cough*

“Bollocks”

Yep, her heart has softened, Jack won her over in record time, and she’s just thinking about that time she adopted a wee Polish lad and loved him as her own because Jack is genetically engineered to be a blank slate son version of a Mary Sue. You take one look at him and he is Your Son in whatever way will most harm you.

-

Good grief I wish Crowley was still around to see what HILARIOUS overlap with Gavin we’d have wrung out of Jack’s main superpower.

-

Cas offering his grace to stabilise Jack on the spot. Halp. It’s more important to him that his son lives by miles, that this isn’t even an internal debate for him. In a way, obvious that Cas would be like this as a parent, in another, Cas just offered to give up his grace live on TV

-

Rowena shoots down the obvious solution (oh and thank god that for once the show actually even references obvious solutions) and starts talking about how we need archangel grace and as soon as she says that I think “oh, Michael” and Dean starts to come over weird with a wooziness that makes me wonder if that was timed for the audience “oh there’s one out there right now” and why would DEAN be personally affected right thiiiiiis second…………………………

-

When they go on spring break together we’re getting right to the murderin

-

I mean SOMETHING is up and Dean’s right now having his own weird moment as Rowena talks about how Jack will now have a fluctuating set of symptoms for the sake of the plot so

-

It’s possible this is just his internal POV emotional reaction to bad news because this is what happens to me when I hear it but I suspect Dean is a lil more healthy than me in the first place so doesn’t verge on passing out whenever a catastrophe happens regularly. And also Sam and Cas aren’t similarly struck with physical symptoms at the news their son is dying.

-

Ya know, Buckleming, or probably Eugenie specifically which makes it all the worse, writing this woman taking a call in a dark alleyway, then not being terrified to be approached by a weird man and on top of that stopping and turning to invite him to join her in the club… this is the kind of thing where they’re writing someone going against all natural instinct that it’s bad characterisation for someone we’ve literally never met before just to put her in danger.

I mean at least they didn’t make Nick stab a random woman (and a black woman at that to add to their overall awful stats)

-

I like how Jack’s just decided Vegas or Tahiti are places you just kinda go to die… I mean I don’t know what he’s learned about them but it all has to be absorbed through the media in his most innocent way. I feel like there’s something very sweet about whatever he thinks you do in these places of reputed sin and blaze of glory live fast die young lifestyles, but also utterly tragic. Consumptive tragic hero but with a twist of the reckless and dangerous later tropes of… It’s 5am and I can’t think but like. Vegas. Drugs and gambling high life style tropey films and books from the American tradition.

And of course it’s Dean (who utterly fits into this trope and even has yearly Vegas trips with Sam since discovering his psychic powers back in season 1 and also lives a blaze of glory mindset) who brings him the deadly glass of milk (film trope about innocence but also like, people dying) and a sandwich loaded with salami. Dean went all out to make that for Jack - a couple of episodes after sending a woman off to “make him a sandwich” and regretting it as he spoke, we see the yank the cloth away reveal of Dean’s nurturing side where he is the caregiver who shows affection through food and will go to the trouble of making his boy a delicious sandwich.

-

“Nice.” See? He’s Dean’s son and Dean approves his choice of places to die. “You sure this is the best time?”

“Pretty sure it is,” Jack says, backpack on, already almost out the door. He’s found a brown corduroy jacket which is both unlike his beige jackets and suits from the rest of his life aside from the blue apocalypse world one, and also very very much like Sam’s iconic season 1-2 brown corduroy jacket that he mostly stopped wearing although I think was the one Dean wore in 4x01 as one of its sporadic dwindling appearances, if I’m not wrong.

-

I probably am but either way, it’s a change to darker colours, something Sam-associated to fit the gap of this smol dangerous dying kid Dean has to deal with, and puts Jack in thick earthier tones, thicker clothes to ward against the cold of death, and dressed more like TFW than normal as he usually has quite a distinct child-like version of their clothes.

-

Jack’s concept of life and mortality is fucked, possibly because he was a functioning being after a day or two of gathering his thoughts and starting to come to terms with asking deep philosophical questions about himself, so in a way discovering he only has a couple more weeks to live is hardly anything. He’s a fucking mayfly.

-

Ugh it’s now solidly 5am and I am clearly not going back to sleep so I give up, I’m finally getting coffee. The rest of the notes will be maybe a wee bit more coherent :P

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Anyway kettle thought: due to Jack and Dean’s murder or be murdered relationship (lordy how is this the only way you relate to fatherhood, my guy?) I kinda suspect that Dean’s about to abscond with Jack without even telling dad 1 or dad 2, because he is dad 3 and that’s totally cool and he’s a responsible adult, but,  you know, woozy and doomed while Jack is also consumptive and doomed. BAD COMBO.

-

I charge you with grounds of diminished responsibility due to mutual murder narrative doom

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“I’m done being special. Before my life is over, I want to live it”

Okay remember in season 1 episode 14 where Dean was like “LOL WE SHOULD GO TO VEGAS BECAUSE YOU ARE PSYCHIC”? and I referenced that like 5 minutes ago so you should, obviously I’ve only ever been able to headcanon the reveal of Vegas Week in season 7 (Dabb episode, take a shot) dates back to that and is one of their between episode activities which makes sense that since they only started travelling as adults together in the canon of the show (and Sam 1 year older than drinking age) that it might as well have been when they started the tradition?

Well Jack here is reacting like Dean would have if HE were the one in Sam’s shoes in 1x14, and being the fun lil brother who actually would be like fuck it let’s go to Vegas and see how psychic I am in the casinos! In the context of season 1 Sam is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too angsty and tragic to do anything other than come across as a stick in the mud who thinks Dean is joking and they’re gonna carry on being tragic and hunting monsters instead. Dean in season 2, episode 9, also wanted to fuck off and go have fun when Sam’s scary destiny got too much for him to carry, and that was when he was locked in the murder or save him vow from John’s last words, which is a similar burden to the narrative bind he’s in with Jack.

Jack, all of his fathers’ son, finally shows up as the god damn first person to take his doom sensibly and actually want to fuck off to Vegas, and that’s demon!Dean levels of fuck it.

Incidentally I half-suspect that Crowley, who has billions of dollars and once bid the moon in an auction (hi I watched 99% of 8x02 yesterday and 1% of it just now) probably was steering demon!Dean waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay carefully around the thought of wait a minute I have an extremely rich and powerful sugar daddy and no responsibilities… VEGAAAAAAAS.

Like, any time Dean started to form the thought, bam, naked triplets show up in their room.

-

Anyway Jack’s busy being tragic, talking about wanting to get a tan (Beach now linked to something to do before death) or see a hockey game (oh shit we forgot Adam) or get a parking ticket (oh so that’s why Dean  murders him)

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“And when it’s all over… die.”

Dean looks over his shoulder, mind made up to abduct the boy and take him joyriding

-

“So that’s your plan, huh?”

“I don’t want to waste time arguing”

“Did I say I disagree”

jack, this is Fun Dad

-

I know, the concept is completely radical and you’ve never seen Dean be fun but trust me.

Even with your very, very limited options, Sam has literally had 3 episodes about how he’s Scrooge, and Cas is… Cas. But Dean is legitimately fun dad when you get him on a good day. Trust me.

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No one’s speaking to Rowena??? How wild.

Poor thing is never going to get her mega coven

-

Dean (who has rocked up already wearing his jacket) spaces out as Sam starts blahing on about the culturally appropriative shaman Ketch has located.

Same, buddy

-

At least Dean isn’t lying to them about stealing Jack. Somewhat. Not the whole Vegas plan.

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Jack smiles at Sam and Cas in a kind of way that somehow conveys in its entirety “this may be the last time you see me but I’m cool with you NOT seeing me die of coughing my lungs up and fun dad has this covered and we’ve always had a weird death cult about our relationship anyway so I’m okay with it and you guys were the best dads but now fun dad is going to take me out back and shoot me where you can’t see and I love you bye”

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“Why don’t you drive?”

Jack is like ?!?!?!?!? D:

EVEN ON HIS DEATHBED he hadn’t figured this would ever happen

It’s the make a wish foundation :’)

This is, of course, the ultimate sign of Dean loving you and caring for you in Dean’s own special way of not telling you he does but showing it with a gesture of absolute confidence and letting you in, and in the vast annuls of the show dates back to the second ever episode where Dean let Sam drive at the end for all of 1 shot (seriously, they’ve swapped back by the long shot at the end of 1x02 where you can’t see them in the car but the prop drivers are definitely doing a generic Sam in the passenger seat Dean driving routine for stock footage :P)

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Anyway Dean loves Jack enough that he’s letting a kid who does not know how to drive learn to drive in the Impala, like he and Sam did.

-

I can see Alex sweating bullets about being seated next to Jensen in the beloved Impala and having to mess up turning it on… never mind the fact that both Jensen AND Dean will murder him if he harms the car, and being murdered on both levels at once is spiritually unsettling and he will probably end up an unquiet ghost.

And yet, the glee at being behind the wheel of this legendary gal

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TRAGIC NYOOOOOM

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“It’s like I’m you! :D”

“No, it’s not! :D (but with implied murder)”

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“THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER”

Look if he survives this, you’re creating a speed demon who will want his own classic car

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And then you’ll have to teach him how to maintain it

oh god

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But yeah, non-toxic parenting in the John Winchester As He Could Have Been style.

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At least as long as Dean is in the Make A Wish mode and not back to tragic murder mode

And that wooziness that he may or may not be associating with no sleep and too much stress suggests this isn’t going to last as a Fun Day Trip For The Boy

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“Cas are you sure you want to handle this alone?”

NO HE NEEDS A HUG HIS SON IS DYING

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Sam, go hug him, you need a hug and your son is dying.

Also, of course, you mutually need each other in this instance and Sam is reaching out to Cas with presumably the intent that he wants to be in on it but is asking as if just concerned about Cas

-

Cas, being Cas, has somehow deduced that Dean is “taking this particularly hard” despite the fact all three of them are Concerned Dads and CAS WHAT THE FUCK are you doing being selflessly concerned about DEAN and sizing up his emotional state when all three of you are wrecked and your son is dying?

You literally have 3x the sitting at his bedside holding his hand moments of any of them and montaged the heck out of the concern at the start of the episode

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I remember way back someone wankily made a chart of how often people talked to Dean about stuff and other people talked to each other about Dean, and Sam is now crying about Dean beating himself up over being mean to Jack at the start of season 13 and regretting it, so this entire conversation is Sam and Cas man paining at each other about how much man pain Dean is in.

I say with no wank in my heart, just sheer horrified amusement at this data point if they still are hate-watching the show and being horrified about how Sam never gets stuff for himself etc (I mean. He and Cas both have had extended chunks of seasons about them parenting Jack and this is Dean’s time to come belatedly to what the two of them already had)

-

Cas finally says “son” a season and change after Jack was wandering around calling him “father” and Sam doesn’t seem inclined to disagree that this is how it feels for all 3 of them.

-

Obviously he’s crying about Jack and it was just the context above that made it look like he was crying about Dean and I always knew that, I’m not a monster, I’m just deflecting because owwwwwwwww this hurts

-

HUG EACH OTHER YOU DUMB FUCKS SO I FEEL BETTER

-

Cas walks off instead and Sam finally after 1000 years discovers how Dean feels when Cas does that when he was angling to come along and they miscommunicated and didn’t say what they meant. Except Sam wanted to come out of mutual Dad Angst comfort while Dean normally wants to go with Cas places so he can hold his hand.

-

Jack’s so proud of himself for being able to drive.

“Born with a wheel in your hand”

He literally stole the Impala from you when he was 7 months in the womb

-

Dean is like, we could get you laid? And Jack is like. Nah. I have a better idea.

No idea what right now but he still doesn’t wanna bang anyone

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Ugh a Nick scene. Tag yourself I’m the old tyre in the foreground

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Is this the house from Family Remains aka the self-admitted worst episode of the show by Kripke and Carver’s explicit design

-

I am going to puke Jack wanted to go on a fishing trip with his dad

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There were spoilers about them doing this but I repressed it the fuck down and lied to myself that Jensen was randomly teaching Alex to fish on set because I didn’t want to think about Dean doing this with Jack because oh my god someone has taken my heart and gouged it out with a rusty spoon.

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Also: someone design Jack a t-shirt with a witty slogan about fishing rather than hook ups. Like, dude bro fishing culture but in a world where you’re as likely to get dumb slogans about not wanting sex as you are for it making you a babe magnet

“I’d rather be fishin” is a thing people get on mugs for the workplace but we could start with this sentiment and play

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ALSO AS I MENTIONED I WATCHED 8x02 IN THE LAST 24 HOURS AND DEAN NEAR RIVERS SUCKS. We also have 10x01 and Daniel the fishing angel (who was the pizza man from Monster Movie, see above: slogans about fishing, pizza man innuendo, we got a thing going here) who was happy on Earth just fishing and enjoying the planet and not wanting to go back to Heaven, in a very heavy metaphor for Cas to deal with, as the angel who once compared free will to teaching poetry to fish. Lots and lots to unpack here, when we turn this into a Dean and Jack father son bonding moment and throw in Dean’s peaceful dream of fishing in 4x20 that Cas interrupted. Fishing is about peace and idyll and comes as a temporary respite in this show. Traditionally, also, of course it’s a sport of patience, and a classic father son bonding activity as the long stillness allows for both manly silence and sharing beers in peace, but also talk if they want to open up a conversation.

For Jack, it’s an overlap of both Cas and Dean parental stuff, Cas’s issues with angelic nature, where he wants to be, WHO he wants to be (just OFFERING to give up his grace to save Jack) and then with Dean we have more classic human cultural tropes but none less painful for Jack’s nature and relationships. Especially throwing in that this was his choice and Dean is indulging him completely here.

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John may or may not have taught them to fish but I feel like it may have had a “so you are dying in the woods” aspect to it rather than for peace and bonding. BOBBY taught Sam and Dean some basic woodsmanship so he was more likely to be the father figure teaching them to fish if anyone did.

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Okay so obviously I typed that just after clutching my heart at the reveal and hitting pause, as Jack immediately goes on to say that John DID teach Dean how to fish and that it was his happiest memory of him - and it comes as a surprise for the expectations (like, that the above paragraph now stands as what I would expect of canon if I was only taking from it and not as an actual writer of the show being allowed to insert new details in which challenge us about the characters, which is where I find the line between fan fic and original fiction really is when it comes to characterisation… Anything out of left-field and you have to tag it as an AU version or explain why instead of just writing it as taken for granted).

And it’s unexpected in the sense that it is such a peaceful thing and above all I think the message is that Jack intuited from whatever Dean said about it that it WAS a happy peaceful memory of John which stood so much at odds with the rest of his life. Filed under as well the thing where Mary started talking about how nice John was to Sam and Sam recoiled in confusion until Mary clarfied it was her John, not theirs. Good memories of a gentle soft John are alarming, and yet perhaps this is a way to really confront and exorcise his ghost more than anything - the sort of funeral servive memorialising of the good with the bad and working through it to come to peace in a different sort of way that lets the wounds heal and the anger leave those scars.

“It was how you said it. I could tell.” He’s such a smart cookie and I think that often takes Dean by surprise in the sense that Jack has been very shrewdly watching him and learning from him and absorbing anything and everything he does, which unfortunately gives him the ability to cold read Dean like very few people do, seeing past the layers and bluffs and into Dean’s core.

-

Jack just murdered Dean by saying if he doesn’t make it he wouldn’t miss Tahiti or the Taj Mahal or implied going to seedy bars and hooking up, he’d miss more time with Dean.

I mean that’s not a literal way to kill someone but you should see Dean’s face. He’s been shot.

And again, it’s a metaphor for what you want from life for DEAN to absorb, the prompt that his family is right here and he doesn’t need to chase pleasure outside of them, that hook up bar nearby their home base where he never strikes out, that’s irrelevant to the family he has built and it’s been put in the subtext of what Dean goes after that’s empty pleasure when he has this core family unit around him, by the way Jack has also rejected it and is explaining to Dean the real meaning of Christmas.

Of course, this all gets a bit weird unless you account for the fact he has an angel wearing a trenchcoat made of husband material waiting back at the Bunker because the chronic singleton life otherwise probably ought to account for an outlet for Dean like a hook up bar if his happy ending is a platonic family bond so, you know, end the show 10 minutes from now with everyone happy and alive and not dying, and all Dean’s learned is they’re 3 dads, one son, a mom and her AUBobby, but he still has unused romantic potential and for seasons and seasons they’ve been trying to close the door on him seeking out random hook ups in the subtext of what Dean WANTS vs what he thinks he can have. This frank conversation about what Jack wants from life before it’s all over is once again ignoring fleeting human connection for the family bonds he values above everything.

-

“I’ve had a good life, Dean” the other reason they’re having this sentimental conversation by a river is because Jack is a fucking mayfly and I hate this

-

@ Dabb please never make me see Cas driving this car ever again

-

Why are you irritating Cas like this. First boring holy fire oh it must be thursday followed by the indignity of making him sit on a pouffe? Listen, when Cas gets irritated he gets snarky and then people die because he snarked them to death. I saw it he did it to the Empty. And Lucifer in 13x12. And Kip.

I just feel sorry for Cas. Why can’t he go on fishing trips with the boy. Oh no he has to sit on a squishy pouffe that won’t let him be intimidating so that he can cure the boy even though Jack’s already decided he’s gonna die and will probably Ophelia himself into the river at the end of the fishing trip.

-

Sergei is basically like “Have you tried turning it off and on again”

Nephilim have a reboot button on the back of their neck, if you get a paperclip and poke it in there.

-

At least Sergei is so… whatever he is… I can’t even tell who he is supposed to be offensive towards :P I guess with the name, I lean Russian, and then he has world esoterica and occult nonsense in his caravan…

-

The real question is how does he know anything about Nephilim and why hasn’t Cas asked that already.

-

LOL he has a vial of Gabriel grace just lying around. Of course, because Gabriel was just offering it up to everyone.

Considering how he was exploited for it by Asmodeus there’s a weird tinge of retconning his own abuse by saying he was going around giving it to everyone before Asmodeus ever bought him and started stealing it on the regular.

Still, it IS awfully tempting a fix to have Uncle Gabriel help Jack out from beyond.

-

/distantly: “I’m not dead!”

sometimes I can still hear his voice.

-

It’s way more likely Shit Goes Down and this is lost but then Cas has learned what to do with archangel grace to fix Jack just so long as they can pin down Michael and grab his instead.

-

But I guess in that circumstance at least once again Gabriel gave them part of the answer from beyond the grave as he did in season 5.

(“Still not dead!!”)

shush Gabriel. The show wants us to think you’re dead and my complete disbelief in that doesn’t change anything for now.

-

Except that maybe Gabriel came back, is fine, but has been removing his grace and selling it in the here and now while claiming not to be Gabriel and that he just haaaappens to have it and because he has no grace he could just be any old guy who happens to have an endless renewable resource of archangel grace secretly on tap to sell to fund his life of laying low. Sergei even says HE got it as part of keeping Gabriel hidden.

-

I’m kind of assuming Sergei isn’t Gabriel unless he offers Cas kielbasa

-

I mean unless later I get a bonus cookie for immediately assuming Sergei is Gabriel based on the holy fire he just happened to have prepared and how similar it looked to Gabriel being trapped in 5x08.

-

On the other hand this may be the first time this season but pointing at literally everyone and going, that’s probably Gabriel, will get old and also dock me cookie points the more wrong guesses I throw out there. Still, this one has pretty strong evidence, from messing with Cas to making him say “Porn stars”

-

To, um, having Gabriel’s grace

-

Okay so Sergei gives Cas all of this out of the goodness of his heart and a “you owe me” and I AM wondering if that’s a Buckleming special because remember in 8x19 where they were like hi we need to go to Hell immediately, and Ajay was like sure, I will take you to Hell and this episode is even titled after me so clearly I am an important character who *stab stab reaper dying noises* wow look I guess we don’t have a bargain after all despite me saying you owe me but then Crowley just maaaaagically made it so you never had to find out what a reaper would want in exchange for taking you to Hell off the books.

-

Also fuck you I never got to finish my pizza

-

While I’ve been typing some random ass justice for Ajay screed, Nick has revealed a flashback to 14x02 where it turns out his neighbour said it was a cop who he saw coming out of the house. I literally went back and checked the episode and that wasn’t in it, so perhaps it’s a new flashback for here, fleshing out that conversation and revealing more for us, and changing the narrative of what Nick’s up to, but honestly who cares enough about all this… I was double zoned out for flashbacks I’d already seen for a side story i don’t care about

-

Wow, Nick, demons killed ya family. Could have told you that.

-

Aw, Dean brought Jack home. No dying out in the wilderness for you, clearly Cas phoned up before Jack could work out his plan to fling himself into the river.

Also Nick has taken up too much of this episode so there’s no room for complicated twists and turns, if Buckleming are banned from introducing too many of them.

It’s incredible how subdividing them so Eugenie writes all the Nick stuff and Brad writes the rest has elevated the parts of the story we care about to pretty much passable, give or take whatever Sergei was and who he was offensive to aside from the whole concept of calling yourself a shaman because you travelled the world collecting occult stuff in a sort of Aleister Crowley way.

-

'cept you can’t namedrop Aleister on this show because both Alastair and Crowley have stolen too much from him.

-

So you get a knock off Sergei instead.

-

Jack hasn’t been having as many of the supposed fainting fits that had everyone dogpiling him as I thought - maybe that’s next episode too. Could have had one at the start but that doesn’t seem enough to be a repeated annoyance of Alex’s life :P

Anyway I was just going to comment on his sweater but that thought hopped in there first wondering if the spell was about to knock him flat, as he’s sitting on a chair instead of safely in bed.

All the more dramatic for flinging yourself around if the spell messes you up

(honestly if the spells don’t work, and they took him out of the hospital, how much of a bizarre commentary is this on trusting modern medicine and vaccinating your nephilims?)

-

It’s 7:20 and my neighbours are yelling again

At least being awake since 3 meant I got a bit more peace and quiet than normal. I feel gross but I may go to yoga just to not be stuck in this room with such awful screeching on both sides of me >.>

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Oh I can tell Sergei is Gabriel, he put the grace in a gold container instead of the silver ones

-

I’m sorry for the expenses, Zerbe

-

I wonder if they use her products on the show and I’m gonna go on my dash and find her beaming about a specially commissioned shiny gold grace that she made for them :P

-

“Here, hold this bottle of your uncle’s essence”

“…. okay I understand how weird that sounded on hindsight”

-

I love the idea of Jack’s grace now being fuelled by Nice Uncle Gabriel who felt kindly towards him, even if this can’t be a permanent fix, it changes his internal make up just a bit so that he symbolically has his grace stolen by his shitty bio father but the power only came from him in the first place and there was all the hoo ha about if Lucifer as his father made him inherently evil. Now whatever happens to Jack, he’s had a grace transplant from a suitable donor, very much like a parallel of say he needed a kidney transplant and his 2 viable donors were his shitty deadbeat dad who gave him the kidney condition in the first place and his nice dead uncle who happened to have been an organ donor and was the only other one with the same type (if Lucifer’s was X evil negative, then I guess Gabriel’s is like X tricksy negative which has enough receptors to be a compatible transfusion, while Cas has like, Z dumbass positive grace and no compatibility)

And Gabriel is a beloved character who proved his kind feeling towards Jack even if they had very little bonding overall, he clearly cared and there was an immediate sort of uncle-y kindness about him in relation to Jack (just the comment alone about identifying that Jack liked shiny things and magic tricks is very much how uncles view small children who they may watch and entertain but not in the end have parental responsibility for), which is hilarious to me because Gabriel deeply reminds me of all 3 of my uncles on my mum’s side, who are all 3 different shades of trickster god in their own right, and he always has reminded me of them, and now the show has sort of made Uncle Gabriel his new legacy.

I mean. I love it to bits.

It’s not a sacrifice FOR Jack like Cas would have given up his grace, but it’s still a part of him passed on to Jack.

-

I am very very aware that like me running my mouth about John (ironically the name of one of my uncles) while hitting pause, I’ve stopped while Jack is looking up with glowing eyes and he’s almost certainly about to spew a fountain of blood across the room and fall on the floor. But I like that the grace even interacted with him and lit up his eyes and unless he physically barfs out the grace to I’m sticking by that ramble.

-

Cas smiled!! That’s the once per season and we already hit it at episode 7, woe betide us

This does look, however, like the scene where they were all looking on from the door so… blood spew in 5 4 3 2 1…

-

DOGPILE THE BOY

-

Er, I mean, help him

-

God I would not want Jared to dogpile me, the man weighs literally as much as an actual moose

-

Uhoh Sergei made Cas mad

I mean

he made him sit on a pouffe, this was always coming

-

What do you mean Eugenie can’t let Lucifer go wow what a shock

-

*kicks a pebble*

-

Ah, here’s the concerned dads scene. I’m just going to let that be a balm to my soul while Dean laments ever taking Jack out to have fun.

-

“You made him happy. You did more for him than any of us”

1 dude you tried, 2 you took him on hunting trips and had fun already this season so he got his Cas Time before he died like he wanted 3 just fucking abduct him wrapped in a duvet and go fishing in the dead of night if you have to, trust me, he’d love it and your family is such a mess he wouldn’t even think it’s weird.

I mean you’ve literally absconded illegally with him before, what’s a trip up to that beach where he was born and some fishing gear really going to cost you with annoyance from Dean

-

“What can we do?”  
“Watch over him,” Rowena says with Cas in the background, and continues to carve me out with a rusty spoon

-

“As he dies”

Nah he’ll be fine shut up Rowena D:

-

*whimper*

-

Well that was a very good episode if you act like me and pretend that none of the Nick stuff happened at all.


	8. 14x08

This episode is the Worst I had to lie to my mum when I came downstairs trembling and tear-stained to get a cup of tea to recover, and play it all off as cold symptoms, and now I feel complicit in some sort of deceit with the episode and like Meredith broke the fourth wall through  _sheer pain_.

Good morning, I slept in until seven after they started digging up the road outside at 9pm at night, so I still kinda have a lingering headache from that, but I’m pretty sure Meredith is about to make good on the Dean n Jack murder pact or something else of that level of awfulness so… *deep breath*

-

YAY it is Lily!! I mean it was pretty obvious from the costuming because wow she’s a distinct person but idk maybe some people thought it was her mom?

Anyway getting a recap just of how terribly Jack is doing and then also a reminder of Lily Sunder is just.. Good recap. *kisses fingers*

(*curls up in agony*)

In all the drama I never noticed Rowena being among those who yelled “Jack!” when he went down and to be honest she knew him five minutes and I’m crediting all that panic in her voice to his absolutely ridiculous powers of being the most adoptable creature in the cosmos. You take one look at him and you want to make sure his shoelaces are tied properly and he has a glass of milk.

Anyway he totally caught Rowena off her guard and made her express an Emotion™ that was not spite and a good chunk of that is new and improved Rowena of the last year or so, but also just… She bonded HARD :P

-

Ironically I left the spoon in my coffee in my haste to get up here and start watching so now I will drink it like that and possibly exit the episode also wearing an eye patch

-

I watched a second and tucked the largest, most comforting stuffed toy this family owns under my arm. Yes, not my personal stash of friends, the family heirloom squishy guy who has been with us through all the worst stuff D:

-

The framing is Sam sitting at Jack’s bedside, Dad no.1 as season 13 firmly established for us, and the dad with the closest traditional relationship of father/son to Jack. Then Cas hovers nearby, struggling to be as close but still Dad no.2 with the ongoing and uncomplicated connection to Jack in the sense that both just sort of accept they’re now father and son without any debate or internal wrangling, and that’s always been Jack’s in with the family and the way he inadvertently got Cas to vouch for him from beyond the grave when he said Castiel was his father and Sam immediately just flipped to Team Jack, not, of course, that he’d not been giving him a huge chance and trying to reach out to him already, but that was his “oh shit this is now my son because Cas is dead” moment.

Finally, Dean fills the foreground, face in shadow, the conflicted Dad no.3 who can’t even face his dying son, taking it personally because this is literally the fourth smol child he’s taken under his wing who he then lost, from Sam, Ben, Emma, a truly tragic collection of lost children. He resisted adopting Jack because he couldn’t be a parent again, not after what Sam put him through as a parent, and yet Jack, the most adoptable boy in the cosmos, eventually wormed his way under Dean’s skin too, and by the end of season 13 Dean was acting fatherly towards him and by this season Dean’s been opening up the doors and letting Jack be his son. And. Whoops. As SOON as you took him on a hunt for one on one father son bonding time, look what happened.

And so Dean will lurk in the foreground, not looking at Jack, peering moodily into some dark empty box that metaphorically is his soul or his remaining ability to cope with losing children or some such nonsense. The pandora’s box of parenthood. He’s full on dark romantic hero brooding.

-

OH  NO  IT IS A RECORD PLAYER NOT A BOX

-

I need our family to retroactively adopt a larger, squishier friend to hug in this trying time

-

Having archived every single one of my watching notes ever between last episode and this episode, I’m more than usually pained by Dean’s “not meant to be crap” line because he’s been resisting it the entire frikkin time, when Sam kept, even long long long before they knew their real destinies, musing if HIS own personal angst was meant to be and Dean was like don’t give me that destiny crap. I swear there’s lines about this back in season 2 or 3 when Sam is musing on his powers and the grim lot fate had dealt them. This is a callback line to Dean dealing with his own sense of unravelling control and pure panic about what was happening to Sam, back when that was a thing in the very early seasons and he was having to face the kid he raised from a baby amongst all that tragedy now recklessly declaring all sorts of horrific things about not being able to resist his destiny. Oh, also, in season 2, while under a murder pact from John about killing him if he couldn’t save him.

Honestly, it’s barely a relationship worth mentioning if you don’t have a murder pact going with Dean. Ben is literally the only one of all 4 children AND CLAIRE who hasn’t had one with Dean.

-

If this episode involves Dean bringing any of his records in to play for Jack I’m gonna go out in my pyjamas and take a long walk to the sea and then keep walking once I reach it

-

Dean you did not walk nearly far enough for Jack to not hear you thump the wall outside his room

-

PS: totally figured the promo scene was an early emotional beat between Dean and Cas which utterly delights me because the earlier that came in the episode the better as it meant less and less chance it was about anything other than Dean and Cas having an intense relationship over this whole thing.

-

Jack is the absolute worst about dying. He’s this saintly angelic little boy from like, no later than 1900s literature, who exists only to bravely suffer and love with his whole heart. He’s snatched out of an era when kids needed morality tales about how to die politely of consumption with the least amount of fuss for their parents and 300 siblings.

How dare you fucking die selflessly. Humanity is at its Bithc This Isn’t Fair stage. Throw a fit. Go walk into the sea out of protest.

-

Okay you’re in Kansas I understand how that is an unrelastic option and I grew up spoiled by the immediate location of the sea should I ever need to walk into it.

-

This show has never made me cry before the title card before.

-

This is the Pippin and Gandalf scene from Return of the King with the whole Into the West thing that they wrote for a sick fan who died before the movie came out and literally Annie Lennox sings what would be Jack’s THEME for this scene.

-

Sam is horrified that Jack didn’t even live long enough for a LotR marathon to explain the reference that’s making him bawl.

-

I LOVE that this scene with Dean n Cas is just about Dean being a wuss about watching his son die because that’s so much worse than Jack having asked for a mercy kill or anything. And this all before the title card. Cas tearing Dean a new one about going in and watching your son die smiling beautifully like a little cherub who can’t wait to find out what happens next.

-

Jack’s gonna be dead before the title card, isn’t he?

-

Oof.

-

Hey, Dean, one more reason to hate yourself :) :) :)

-

Also robbed Cas of watching him go.

-

But I think tbh they could have done this if Dean wasn’t being a coward about watching Jack die that they would leave Sam to sit at this side in the last moment.

-

Ugh, my eyes are leaking too much to type. What the hell is all this wet stuff coming out of them.

-

I’ve never seen a TFW shot where Sam was the shortest but he is slumped over like someone cut all his strings.

-

“Your brother’s in pain” AND WE’RE NOT? YOU’RE NOT? CAS ISN’T?

-

Dean stopping Cas going after Sam with just a catch of his shoulder… Ugh. The two of them are still connected through all this in a way where Cas and Dean are connected whether Dean’s in the most obvious pain or Sam is.

-

Cas, pls be selfish and in the most obvious pain at some point this episode.

-

Oh please don’t make me watch Dean telling his mom that Jack died

please

I beg you

-

They put a photo of Kelly next to Jack’s bed D: Or has he always had that?

-

That’s not even the photo that Cas had pinned to his board in 12x10 and yes I went and checked, I’m leaking tears too much to watch because Cas is standing over him and this is going to be the worst while Dean’s answerphone message lays over the top.

I’m so not here to watch TFW mourn their son.

-

They had him for like a WEEK this SUCKS.

-

ALso I said “please don’t make me watch” so they cut away to Cas mourning silently while Dean talks to Mary’s answerphone because Meredith is an evil fairy who whimsically takes your wishes and twists them into even worse options.

-

*takes my glasses off and throws them aside angrily when Sam emerges carrying a duffel over his shoulder and wearing the fucking orange jacket he first met Jack in*

-

God, I don’t even wear them for focus, just lack of headaches. Why was I bothering.

-

7x10 and this episode are probably going to be unholy companions in this show’s canon

“She’s come down with acute Tear Duct Blockage. The only option is head amputation or we make her cry, NOW” “Don’t worry, I have just the thing.”

-

Dean this answerphone message huuuurts

Also explains the Buckleming issue of not calling Mary, to just say, yeah, it escalated, rapidly.

-

Your brother is storming off and Cas is broken.

-

If I have to see Cas see a set of PB&J crusts and a glass of milk identical to what Dean saw in 9x10 I’m - well, I’m still here instead of walking off into the sea so my threats are starting to look a bit performative. BUT I’M THINKING IT.

-

Cas watches Sam go, while Dean is being dwarfed by the bunker and obfuscated by its maze of corridors.

-

*presses my hands over my eyeballs* STOP. STOP IT. GOD. You’re not even sobbing or anything you’re just lEAKING. This is so annoying! I’m gonna dehydrate and they’ll find a shrivelled skellington here and I’ll go with just a few quiet sniffs and a dumb smile on my face like fucking Jack did.

Now I’m just distraught about the first time ever in canon we see Cas drive, it’s in his dumb blue car and Dean’s broken and not up for driving even if Sam presumably hadn’t stolen the car for his errand/driving until he finds the sea and walking off into it mission. All my myriad fantasies about Cas behind the wheel of the impala and Dean grinning at him like yeah that’s my baby (which one is he talking about?), and nope we’re getting Cas’s little partymobile and Dean’s mute expression of grief.

-

NEVER MIND THEY SHOWED ME SAM CURLED UP ON THE GROUND USING THE IMPALA AS A BELOVED FAMILY HEIRLOOM TO HUG AND I SOBBED OUT LOUD FUCK  YOU MEREDITH FUCK YOU

-

I need the tissues why were they not here in preparation for this episode

-

I need to avoid my mum all day on the ground of spoilers because my face is a walking spoiler

-

“TELL ME YOU DIDN’T  MAKE A DEAL” “wha- no, I’m trying to make a pyre”

Making a pyre doesn’t usually involve curling up on the floor.

Cas is getting an accidental glimpse of 13x01’s emotional landscape, not that anyone will tell him this was what it was like for Dean, that we now have Sam in the spot of. We’re getting some mirror image missing moments, like we just saw Dean get the axe out but did see him begging God… in this one we see Sam go take it out on a tree.

-

Incidentally I re-read all of Terrible Coffee AU two days ago for Reasons and the scene where Sam is whaling on a tree while screaming into the sky is pretty much this. Which is fucking hilarious that 2 years ago I decided Sam taking out his feelings on the local trees was a Thing when he was depressed.

(I wrote that scene the day Eileen was murdered on the show and honestly at the time he was mostly just angry on canon!Sam’s behalf and I figured I’d come up with plot reasons later.)

-

Oh, they weren’t driving the party!mobile, they were driving something else. I’m not even gonna ask where they get these vehicles

-

Yeah I’m harping on Dabb vs cars because Cas is talking about Jack’s story ending like this and certainty of death for angels and this is just… the worst.

-

the story line - Cas deciding how their stories go. Dean resisting the how it’s supposed to be of Jack’s death. TFW want to take the narrative into their own hands. We KNOW in this world deaths are stored in notebooks, potential ways to pass that you skate past until one claims you. They’re free to write their own stories but the ending is always pre-written for them… It’s just a matter of which one. But Cas especially… Jack was supposed to bring paradise, and maybe the emotional landscape between season 12 and 14 is a gulf of difference in their openness and bonds, largely facilitated by Jack’s presence in the narrative and relentless open love for everyone who was nice to him and even those who weren’t in Dean’s case. He breezed through their lives, manic pixie dream girl’d them to emotional health, and mayfly’d out. But that’s THEIR stories. That’s not JACK’s story. That’s not the epic destiny something as cosmically powerful as him was due, and the potential he was shown to have… It abruptly gets into the territory of Dany having her whole Stallion That Mounts the World prophecy for the son she lost… I’ve not watched the TV show since it diverged so wildly I couldn’t hack it any more, but the books with everyone wondering if, like, Jon Snow was this guy instead, etc, picking this that and the other guy… what if Dany’s lost child WAS the only one it applied to and the prophecy just fizzled out? ASoIaF looms over Jack’s narrative… He’s literally been framed against an Iron Throne in the past, and his character arc for parts of season 13 was a sort of anti-Joffrey in many ways. And then in death, GRRM’s unromantic look at fairytales and heroic narratives comes for him too, that maybe it doesn’t always happen like the stories say…

… but of course, he also has LotR coding, and in THAT regard, Sam Gamgee has his good old speech about the heroes in the stories and how we relate to them and are inspired by them and become them. The stories that matter. And Jack’s was supposed to be one of those. In a way, their lives have been so epic that Jack mostly having a personal impact rather than a cosmic one seems wrong to them. That he didn’t become the great hero of his own story, but was a tragic hero who ran a dramatic but personal arc and burned out because his asshole father killed him and his asshole uncle presumably finished him off with an experiment in grace transfusion. At least if my dashboard is to be believed :P It’s inconcievable to TFW, the “making it up as we go” people who tore up the script and threw away the pages, that they can’t just make this happen or that Jack didn’t serve some great purpose. Even men as weary of Destiny as they are, struggle. Just because that was their lives, so how could the son of all three of them not follow in all his fathers’ footsteps?

-

“Jack being taken before his time… Being taken before *me*” Cas shut the fuck up.

But that is the speech from Theoden, and once again Sam is Gandalf, which is fucking hilarious that Sam’s been Gandalf TWICE this episode.

Ever it’s grown on the tombs of my forebears…

you have four bears???

-

God dammit that joke didn’t stop me crying as they go knock their glasses together and hold Jack’s lil 3 dads wake

-

3 Dads Wake is a great name for a whiskey

-

God, Cas is drinking.

-

CAS.

-

They need to give him like one bottle to every finger of whiskey they drink but dammit if they don’t get Cas loaded.

-

Letting them talk privately about how aweomse Jack was and not letting us hear it is a crime

-

Listen you don’t even know me if you didn’t think as soon as the nougat appeared on screen I didn’t hit pause and sob for a whole minute with my hands over my face

-

Officially worse than bobby and the goddamn licorice conversation

-

Cas laughing with caramel hanging out of his mouth is the worst thing the sho whas ever done and I’m suing for emotional damage

-

Imagine being one of the bitter stans who hates one or more of TFW or Jack right now watching this scene. God, are you even human. They’re eating Jack’s secret nougat stash they all pretended they didn’t know he had.

-

I can’t believe I’m now thinking that Lily showing up will probably be a lighthearted way to bring up the mood of the episode.

-

Cas is offficially wobbly! We have Cas tipsyness!!

-

Sam tapping out first. Oh no. Don’t leave. Don’t.

-

Fuck you Sam Winchester how dare you canonically be the most lightweight of TFW consistently for the entire show and need to go crash off the side of your bed and sleep on the floor while Dean n Cas are still drinking together.

-

Did Dean seriously outdrink Cas.

-

Well that’s… something.

I am gonna cling to that like a rock in the churning sea I have walked out into.

-

Also I managed to calm myself down with walking around my room taking deep breaths so I could go downstairs pretending not to be a wreck, so I could get tea, and my mum made me finish the sudoku for her. I don’t have the heart to show her this episode. She loves Jack more than anyone in this god damn fandom and maybe more than Cas does. Maybe I’ll lie to her and say the show ended last episode and Jack was fine hahahahaaaa

-

OH FUCK I hit play and there was a single line of dialogue for the whole wake. Dean drunkenly slurring to Cas, I think, you know we did everything we could, right?

I’m…

*walks further out into the ocean*

-

“Here’s to you Jack, wherever you are” I am not okay.

-

Oh fork you Meredith we did not need to see the boy in Heaven eating burgers.

-

Oh fork you Meredith we did not need to see the boy in Heaven eating burgers while on a case with all of his dads.

-

OH SON OF A BENCH THIS IS THE DODGE CITY CASE AKA 13x06 MEREDITH YOU DINK.

-

Oh dear, Heaven is broken. Who was the ashhole who was saying that Jack should die so that he can go to Heaven so he’s well-placed to help deal with all this nonsense.

-

LOL Jack would be the sort of person who goes to Heaven and doesn’t need more than a second of prompting to be  like oh wait I am dead and in Heaven, and just, like… Go open the door. Just pop his head out like cooee I wanna hang with my dads anyone here to replace the bulb in the sun so I can carry on hanging out here for eternity?

Like, seriously, I’m dead, this is when I am supposed to catch a break.

-

Let The Boy Say Fork.

-

Listen, secondary to his power to be adopted by everyone on sight, Jack is uncanny also with just walking into trouble.

-

And to try and be clam for a moment, this is Jack getting pulled back into the story, but not just by unfortunate happenstance, because he was the one with the sharpness, the cosmic awareness even on this level that Heaven just doesn’t quiiiiite work for him in the way it’s supposed to even if say it was at full power, that he is the one who voluntarily not just understands instantly that something is wrong, but then is fully snapped back to his old self, and chooses to open the door, and that is the moment of choosing to continue his story, at least for now.

It’s like how the last time we saw Bobby chronologically was in Inside Man and Cas and Sam woke him from his repose and got the fighting spirit back into him enough to open his own door and rejoin the story for one last hurrah… And it was a choice there too, a moment of once more telling the natural order to screw itself, Bobby could step outside the proscribed ending of his narrative one last time.

Unless Jack finds him and is adopted on sight today.

-

Sam looks way too healthy.

Invigorated by having a Plan

-

Lils. Finally getting to see the Bunker filled with all her stolen research notes.

And no that wasn’t canon before, but boy am I hoping she recognises her research amongst all the bunker’s angel lore.

-

Men stealing fuckin everything

-

“We’ve never looked through Kevin’s angel tablet translations”

HAVEN’T WE?

NO

WE HAVEN’T

THEY HAVE BEEN THERE

FIVE

FUCKING

YEARS

And every forking time something comes up where they might be useful I say, HEY WHAT ABOUT KEVIN’S ANGEL TABLET TRANSLATIONS?

and the show says

hey so we don’t have the angel tablet but we do have the demon tablet

and I’m like I’m sure that won’t have any dumb side effects that could be avoided by having the angel tablet translation just on hand in your archive

did Meredith hear me screeching

because I screeched very very loud after 13x14

13x13 sorry

that was Bucklemming handing her the wrong fucking tablet

-

this is bitter vindication but feels even better than her and Bobo remembering the grace extracting needle in 12x19

-

Glynn is a fucking gift.

-

On the other hand this episode now is pulling on 9x06 and 12x10 at once and that makes me feel woozy

I can’t deal with a Glockeybo combo

-

Also waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah Kevin’s handwriting. I can’t deal with that AND Bobby memories AND FUCKING NOUGAT DEATH

-

Which I mean I do feel instantly better about once he opened the door and let himself back into the story and I stopped crying at once and cheered up and Lily is indeed providing much needed relief, wild as that all sounds.

-

Lily trying to explain her soul magic to Sam and Dean, rubes who haven’t done a single enochian calculation in their lives.

Wait, no, Sam has done one, in … 12x19 …

But yeah, a rube and a completely self-taught asshole who knows like one thing about it.

And she’s like oh yeah just use his soul and they’re like AAH WTF LILY and she’s like er this is the most obvious thing in the world what is the problem here

-

where are my cas reaction shots

-

Jack wearing an eyepatch for the rest of the show would be adorable and hilarious

-

“it won’t cost much… he’ll never miss it” trust me his soul is enormous and boated with sweet nougat love, he can spare it, guys.

-

Dean being able to say “Jack’s dead” one day later, when he couldn’t say it about Cas practically until he was BACK

-

Nice trade. TECHNICALLY nothing dodgy about it at all, at least in the sense that aside from resurrection consent issues from Jack, once he’s back the choice is still on him to choose to grow old and die as Lily has done, or even to stop using the magic to sustain himself and die again immediately if he is squicked out by it… Or it all comes from trading on his OWN soul power.

Definitely better than demon deals or having any favours looming over them etc

And with Heaven in the state it’s in, honestly sending Lily there might be easier than they think if NO ONE IS LEFT TO RUN IT.

Er, imminent ghostpocalypse issues aside.

-

We’re in ghostpocalypse territory as of a minute ago show time, btw.

-

Cas has quietly observed all this chatter and we get back to him when he says, “Don’t you think Jack should decide for himself” so honestly Cas is right there with me, and I always like when me and Cas are the ones agreeing on a thing in the episode.

-

Obligatory reminder that Sam is more aware than most about soul stuff

*takes another piece of coal off the pile I was going to send Meredith for ruining christmas*

-

HEY, ANUBIS.

Don’t tell him about what they did to Osiris

Unless that would amuse him

Wait never mind Meredith is literally throwing in amusing snark about 7x04 which I think when Adam Glass disowned that episode (despite how I actually think it’s really good and he was too hard on it) he never expected anyone would ever want to throw in amused references about it in canon ever again.

-

“When God left - sorry, long story - ” Lily is one of the few people who seems able to conceptually roll with the nonsense TFW deals in all day.

She should join the squad. Always room for a 100 year old badass with deep enochian lore knowledge.

-

I’m sorry has Jack crashed Kelly’s heaven or is this a rando little girl. I immediately thought she was Kelly in the long shot and they substituted a lil girl for POV when we got closer and actually had to go back and look again and she was the little girl all along.

-

This also conceptually looks so much like Cas’s eternal tuesday afternoon.. A rainy, flower-filled garden.

-

Roosevelt looks SO much like the doggie in 11x20 aside from anything else

-

IT IS KELLY

-

This is horrifying since they never ever got to meet ever until now and I’m suing Meredith

-

I mean I’m already suing her but I’m just adding this to the list of complaints. My laywers are working overtime on this episode.

-

FORK!! THEY GOT HER BACK FROM LEGENDS OF TOMORROW FOR A DAY!!!!

-

Can Kelly and Jack go on a rampage around Heaven to fix things?

-

Her hair is suspiciously darker from the back which I think is her Legends look from the gifs I’ve seen

-

Wait, Bobby had a forking dog called Rumsfeld, and Kelly has Roosevelt.

-

“Hi mom you’re dead”

“…………………………………………………. NOooOoOooooOOoo No no no baby no”

Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

-

Dean resisting the spell and complainging “gotta happen, no other way” is making me feel like the Heaven Drama is going to smack them right before they can get it all done and give them a LOT MORE to worry about than Jack but also give them a roundabout way to see him again and also, of course, mean Lily might be useful for an entirely other purpose while she’s here…

-

Dean right now is rationalising this through the lens of that all their terrible deals have been terrible and that this is just one more step on the Winchester life and death merry-go-round, and of course that Jack is about to get the full family treatment he deserves. But that’s the Winchester lens of looking at things that even when deaths are brutal and lives cut unfairly short, there’s going to be a way to bring them back if they haven’t finished their stories. John finished his, in 2x22 seeing Dean get the revenge he needed to be at peace, but everyone else…

Is it ethically right to put Jack on that merry-go-round when he smiled sweetly and died with as much enthusiasm as he gave pretty much everything in his life?

-

The table lamps are out in the bunker D: them being dark is so ominous

-

And Cas shows up like shiiiiiiiiiiiiiit something worse going on guys

-

They’re so casual about just summoning gods into their front room these days

Of course they’re doing it in the spot in front of the door with the war room behind in one direction… The opposite end of the library to where they opened the rift.

-

Sam picks his way through the wet paint but Dean stands right in the centre of this circle for SUMMONING THE GOD WHO DECIDES WHO LIVES AND DIES AND WHERE THEY GO to have this lil chat with Lil?

-

And now Dean steps out of it and corners her with the obvious question - what’s wrong with your magic and why are you risking going to Hell to stop using it entirely?

-

I’m so sorry you have to look at more dead angels, Cas

I’m also so sorry they were killed by black slime because wow after season 7 that was a laugh and a half for you

-

… Can you swear in the hallways of Heaven?

-

DUMA LIVES

(probably “for now” though hopefully longer than that)

Ma'am are you aware you have a Nougat on the loose too

I’d love it if Cas is like hi what’s happening also have you seen my son

-

This actress needs to come back for a 3rd time to follow Dean around in a crisis moment.

-

OH NO now Cas is coming to the heaven memory and seeing what Jack considered his best memory

-

YEAH. I knew Naomi would show up, I just didn’t know when :D

(She wasn’t in the credits as far as I could tell but I already sort of knew they were leaving people off? Or maybe I was thinking lol I bet Amanda Tapping is in this episode and they won’t tell us… On the other hand she mAY have been in the credits but I was WEEPING MY EYES OUT so didn’t clock her despite my efforts to hold myself together and see who was coming up on screen)

-

Naomi doesn’t have the most dramatic entrance on the show but she sure is racking up points for good entrances one at a time each time she appears. She never just, like… toddles onto screen normally.

-

“Perhaps the angel side of him knew he was in Heaven” honestly the most tragic thing I was trying not to think about is that he knew the entire time but he was willing to play along and enjoy hanging with his dads for eternity despite that.

-

Oh man it’s another dispute over who owns Jack. Is this kid never going to be allowed to just sit and eat burgers and nougat? (Hopefully not at the same time)

-

Also based on last episode where it seemed like the Empty was awakening but had Lucifer’s eyes and we were all NOOO fork that!! is there some more complicated forked up aspect to what’s going on or is it just itself and awake and coming for Jack?

-

I love how Naomi just casually knows how many people are in Heaven

-

“What’s one nephilim boy against all that?”  
“But he’s MY nephilim boy!!”

-

OH NO NAOMI

-

NOT LIKE THIIIIIS

-

We better get an answer on her state by the end of the episode because she’s my fave villain bar Metatron on the entire show and devouring her in shadow is just… yikes.

-

“give it a sec” *POOF* Anubis is prompt, okay.

-

He probably honestly is somewhat slighted that they’re 14 years into their career and he hasn’t clapped eyes on them.

-

“Yeah, we’ve died.” “A LOT.”

-

I honestly, at this point, do not blame them for their lax attitude towards the permanence of death. They need a lot of counselling they’re not getting and until they do they really are going to always be terrible at this.

-

A brief moment where Anubis is like, am I going to get Flirty Banter with Dean Winchester?? and he looks at him and Dean’s eyes are all dead and “my son is dead” and Anubis sighs like welp not today oh well better luck next time, if I survive this…

-

Getting flirty banter with Dean is a sign of high honour and takes you to some very interesting places.

-

Into Dean if you stick with it like Crowley did

-

And Lily’s been standing there this whole time like wow these boys suck up all the attention in the room and I kinda hate them

-

Oh I LOVE this abacus. Is this some nerdy ass research that meredith did to know better than most what to expect here? Even I haven’t heard this one, though I haven’t really revisited Egypt lore after the expected Egyptology phase as a kid…

Anyway the half white half black beads are super interesting in a wider show symbolism way.

-

Oh deeear, Lily.

-

Of course that instantly makes you fascinated about what would happen if TFW stuck their hands over it.

-

What a good line on the show’s philosophy about making your own fate - it’s not destiny or a choice from above or anything like that. Your individual actions get you sent to Heaven or Hell in the natural course of things and it’s weighed in such a way all he can do is use his equipment to read which way you’re going… Everything else is down to you. Free Will, write your own story.

Of course, if Lily did some huge sacrifice I bet she could change things.

-

CAS LAUGHED

ugh this episode should be banned.

-

If you hug Kelly I’m rioting.

-

Everyone who ever hugs Cas slaps their hands firmly on Misha’s broad shoulders like it’s law and digs in and I don’t know if it’s because Cas has this wonderful presence about him that even when you’re around Misha acting him in the moment you get swept up in it, or you just want to hug Misha like that, but Cas hugs look like the most amazing hugs in the universe and everyone just GOES for it.

Also I am typing this nonsense because I literally used up my box of tissues earlier and the next option is stealing a roll of toilet paper. So I will snark and try and ward off the sobbing.

-

“I’m so sorry. I failed you.”  
Kelly, who has spent about 5 minutes in Jack’s presence and understands his nature even beyond her blind faith in him from before but now gets to see the evidence of it: “You didn’t. You didn’t.”

Yes, please can more characters tell Cas that he did a good job even when things don’t quite go to plan. Dean’s drunken slurring about how they did the best they could, this…

Kelly tells Cas how wonderful Jack is like Cas doesn’t know and Cas breaks up.

And you know what this looks like and I’m not going to survive typing this and can already feel my eyeballs filling up with water… 10x20 and Jimmy and Amelia talking about Claire at the end of the episode oh god I hate it take it away from me.

-

Oh good Cas telling Jack we need you alive to fix Heaven but just in a passive way where you not being dead means the Empty backs the fuck off rather than you having to DO anything

-

Ooops the Empty is here as Dumas. I suspect she’s not surviving this episode but MAYBE Naomi survives.

-

I am saying with full wishful thinking after seeing her completely consumed by black goo

-

I do like the concept of “THERE ARE MAJOR STAKES TO RESURRECT THE BOY. BRING HIM BACK THIS INSTANT. LITERALLY SAVE THE UNIVERSE BY BRINGING THE NOUGAT SON BACK TO EARTH.” because that makes it so much different from “hey bring me back and maybe accidentally unleash some terrible evil in the process but we’ll deal with it later  because that’s what we do”

-

“HE’S OUR KID” Sam snaps

I hate it, thanks

For the love of god appeal to  her more as a fellow parent.

-

Dean DIRECTLY EQUATES Jack and May

Hold me

-

Equating no soul to not being human in front of Sam aka our no soul test case. Owie. Another reminder of just how hard Dean took it in season 6 until he got Sam back, all that skin crawling feeling of being around him…

You know what? Jack reminds me of the sort of example nice ensoulled Sam stuff we saw in 6x12 when Jared was allowed to play over the top sweet and uncomplicted for a few scenes, just to be a total contrast to how he’d been acting thus far in the season. Of course, we saw him for like 3 scenes of Dean smiling in pure relief when Sam did Nice Things before it all got complicated again, and Jack’s been a long-time character :P But Sam does have a sweet street that when it emerges in the rare times it can be uncomplicated, is I think the closest equivalent to where Jack’s innocent sweetness is drawn from. He’s the son of Sam’s puppy dog eyes specifically.

But yeah I think Lily just needs to have this resistance and anger about it all to make it so much more of a flip if she were to decide to do the spell, so that it counts as an even gooder good deed to MAYBE flip her chances. By giving her a good work to do.

And hey maybe if she meets Jack for a minute she’ll love him and then be changed by the experience and go out and do more good things etc etc.

-

DUMAS IS SO GOOD AT BEING CREEPY!!

-

Misha hammed the FORK out of being the Empty and now she has to live up to it and she IS.

-

CAS don’t fight the Empty by trying to stab it, fight the Empty by humming this is the song that never ends.

-

*makes a disgruntled sad noise about being forced to see Jack laid out on a table in his cute lil PJs with his cute lil socks*

-

Wait, if Lily does this spell does this mean she’s using up the last of her soul to do it and going to the Empty anyway?

-

ANGRY LIONESS KELLY COMING TO YELL AT THE EMPTY AND GIVE IT A PIECE OF HER MIND

I’ve just paused after her yelling “STOP” but whatever happens next, she leaped in when Cas was getting kicked around and that’s BAD ASS.

-

Hitting Kelly is like… probably a rage button Jack didn’t even know he had so I would like to see how that goes over, but we cut to them trying to resurrect him.

-

I forking love how this is 2 seasons in a row where the message seems to be that you live to spite nihilism and the bitter end of death.

-

D'aw even though Sam said they’d pray it was Dean who used prayer to reach out to Cas in Heaven to give him that heads up. Like, totally practical rather than the sort of prayer he’s made before to Cas that was all emotional appeal, but, let’s save our son, huh?

-

CAS NO DON’T SAY THAT

The Empty might also really want to think about that because it knows you forking suck to keep around so trading yourself for Jack is like… really? do I really want that? :P

-

“Not for years. EONS, MAYBE.” Cas, bud. I love you. I want you to stay alive that long. Do you really forking think that with the life you lead you have eons left? I mean it’s really heartening to hear you talk about yourself this way. But I have to ask.

-

The Empty telling Cas that it’ll come for him when he finally lets himself be happy is forking hilarious. Cas hasn’t been happy once in his life and he doesn’t plan to start now. Eons, maybe.

Just like that, he’s unlocked eternal, grumpy life. Take notes, Lily.

-

I mean on a practical level this is basically like, yeah, this is why Destiel isn’t canon, because as soon as Cas allows himself to be happy, he’s ALWAYS known he gets punished for it. In 4x20 he rebelled for Dean and was instantly dragged back by Naomi… This sense of another mission, never belonging, always being on the outside and not getting the emotional resolution he needs, and actively running from it at times or throwing himself in the way of danger to make Dean be happy without him… it’s interesting honestly that the Empty is here as Duma and not Naomi as she’s been the agent of hoiking him back from happiness enough times in canon… And that fear of losing everything as soon as you’re happy? That’s what first kept Dean from Jack and then as soon as he really truly fathered Jack, happened to him. Like, that’s Team Free Will’s entire life story, starting with Jess, to date, here with the Empty making this threat.

-

Duma survived!!

-

Cas… really could have just bought a few minutes to do the spell rather than given himself that burden >.>

But he’s determined to make a more lasting sacrifice, one that ensures this won’t happen again with Jack, that he can always die whenever he wants and go to Heaven and not be bothered here.

-

Oops Jack’s angry now. Now he’s seen a dad sacrifice for him, he’s suddenly got a case of the Winchester Angsts. Dean in season 2, for starters. Not a good place to be D: Dean in season 2 is proportionately his worst season.

-

I’m not crying because I think I already died earlier in the episode, but that was… truly awful… to watch Cas tell Jack he’s at peace with it and he loves him and everyone loves him and then Kelly butts in like I LOVE YOU TOO and mom him a bit with straightening his jacket and hugging him and… UGH.

-

Lily has either the start of a heart attack or loses her soul entirely in the background and wanders into a corner to die? Er.

-

OH HEY WE ALSO MANAGED TO GET THE WORST DEAN HUG SINCE 2x22 WHEN HE GRABS JACK. NEVER SEEN HIM HUG LIKE THAT BEFORE, DON’T WANT TO SEE IT AGAIN THANKS

-

Nope, she just dieded.

Let’s hope she went to heaven and we get a super corny young Lily surprise Alicia Witt return moment at the end since this episode is just throwing everything at it.

-

It’s Anubis’ office!!!

Wow, that’s a noisy annoying place to work

Still, I LOVE these visualisations of where the cosmic forces of the universe work

-

I called it super corny but I’m DYING to see Lily’s fate change.

-

“Say hello to your daughter for me” DOn’t make me cry about Lily please I beg you I am run dry

-

OH THANK GOD NAOMI SURVIVED. Hooooooraaaaay!!!!!!! Oh this is a wonderful ending to a perfect episode to not have to deal with her having being consumed and left dead off-screen somewhere.

-

LOL that slam as he realises what’s up and even though she obviously can do what she wants, he’s still protectively closing Kelly’s door to put a barrier between her and Naomi.

-

“I’m here to thank you”

Oldest trope in the book, but I love when they look over their shoulder to see if “you” is someone else, and Cas, unflappable Cas, in Naomi’s presence, still checks the infinite empty corridor.

-

*double checks*

“…… you’re welcome?”

Wheee unlocked new plot for altrusim!

-

Ahahaaaahaaaaaaaaa Jack wrapped in a fluffy grey robe. Listen. I am

not

okay.

Jack with his burger and Dean’s dead guy robe, spitefully living…

-

I bet Dean made the burger

-

WHY did I type that when I knew how likely it was to make my eyes burn.

-

I did not cry at the last scene of them all at the table so I am going to eat extra cookies at lunch as a reward.

And Jack and Cas sharing a little glance, knowing what Cas did. Father and Son’s first dire family secret! :’)

-

And gently roll the camera away to credits to leave them to their happy little scene.

-

Presumably with a slow fade so you can fumble for some more tissues.

Gyah.


	9. 14x09

jingle bells, bobo smells,   
It is no fun, for us to wait  
All christmas in hiatus

-

Berens… please…… I beg you……….. don’t kill the sweet precious moonchild that is Garth. Please. The joke is “how are you still alive!?” and it would be a disrespect to Bobby’s memory, and he represents a stable post-hunting endgame that was a beacon in season 9. In this essay I will

-

They used Dean’s dead-voice “we’re the guys that scare them” speech about hunting monsters in 13x05 to open. I wonder if Yockey wrote that thinking it might be the logical open to 13x23 and instead they used “this is boring, got any music?” also from one of his episodes.

[i guess! meme]

-

The recap left us hanging about if Jack was alive or not for the Kaia recap which turns out to be rude even though I know that he’s fine (“fine”) now because I am so emotionally affected by this dumb lump of nougat that not seeing an instant “he’s okay haha tricked you!” legit raised my stress levels a notch.

-

Maybe because it’s 4am and I was demolishing a slab of toast before the December chill in my room got it first, but I don’t think there was any particular art or storytelling to the recap worth mentioning or musing on, and this came across almost more like the recap AFTER the break because getting back to plot stuff like seeing Mikey things again… The 13x05 lines make me wary on Dean’s emotional behalf but obviously these are for very different reasons so the only real thing that might come up is that Cas is hiding his deal from Dean and Dean sounded so dead in the feels because Cas was dead. Obviously the real stress right now is what’s up with Dean re: obvious nerve-wracking things like the djinn bouncing off his head or his swooshy vision, things we’ve been collecting up to ask more pointed questions about when Michael’s in the room.

-

Americans: “that’s downtown Vancouver!/an actual American city!/the ACTUAL American city in the caption!” me: “hurrrr skyline”

-

How much budget for Christmas music

I hate this episode already

-

Okay the blood and screaming is improving things.

-

Listen, werewolves always have so much fun these days. We had the knock knock one in 13x09, the Kardashian ones in 13x23, and now we have wereSanta here, who just spotted the mistletoe. D'aaaw.

-

These halo-shaped lights in this apartment Michael picked sure are gonna come in handy if the director knows what they’re doing.

-

GARF. Please say you’re here undercover.

-

OH SHIT. Michael KNOWS. Being in Dean’s head does that to you. All his peeps get embedded in your brain. Please tell me some 2 way vessel/angel nonsense happens and you can’t bring yourself to harm him.

-

GARTH HAS A LITTLE GIRL NOOOOOOOOOOOO

She adores Mr Fizzles. Garth spends hours with them hanging out together.

-

I don’t believe him though. I mean. He’s just telling Michael what he wants to hear, right?

-

Having a little girl is such a way to die, though. I mean. Can we just… not do that?

-

Let Garth Go Home For Christmas

-

Those halos sure aren’t landing over Michael’s head no matter how many of them there are

-

Jack: eating gross cereal made of cookies at midnight in the dark

Me: I love and support you and have done the same

Cas: *SQUINT*

-

Dadstiel is the best

-

Sam being the “it will rot your teeth” dad is also the best. I love the Dad Heirarchy being established here. Sam is still Dad no.1 and the one who lays down the rules and gets disobeyed about midnight cereal, full on domestic dad-ing. Cas is the dad who hears you munching from across the entire Bunker and sighs and gets out of Dean’s bed where they’ve been watching movies together (I extrapolate from missing data) and comes to investigate but ends up in the Secret Midnight Cookie Cereal Pact instead.

-

If Garth dies he may bequeath Mr Fizzles to Sam to help parent Jack, who is now keeping secrets about midnight cereal consumption and needs an expert lie-detector to help him parent.

-

Okay, so, in season 9 after Dean took the Mark of Cain he was up all night eating cornflakes and not sleeping. The corn was symbolic to Cain. Jack goes through all he did and has cookie cereal which is just his sweet tooth. But he had foreign grace implanted in him, and also is tapping a lil bit of his soul to be alive, meaning he’s in a weird power situation and we don’t know what’s up with him at all. TFW are very much like “upright and not coughing blood is good enough for us”, especially when with magic involved it’s not like they might have an actual science explanation ever come their way.

Jack sitting in the dark is obviously symbolic of hiding things, his cookie cereal is disapproved of and a guilty secret from Sam in the first place, he’s consuming something - willingly - that’s bad for him and will rot him right after the sweet sweet probably not Gabriel grace he ingested 2 episodes ago, and added all up makes a secret - and he and Cas of course share Cas’s deal secret so it’s not like Cas can go stomping around complaining to the other dads what he found Jack doing without Jack being like yeah well guess what CAS did.

It’s sure a fun way to parallel the beginning of Dean’s dark dark arc and Jack’s sugary sweet dark arc.

-

Dean: kid if you are going to sit in the kitchen at weird hours and eat cereal, at least self-flagellate a little *slams the box of cornflakes down in front of him.*

-

Jack also is wearing a lot of red lately.

-

Though his new jacket is santa-coloured not like… Mark of Cain doom blood death coloured like demon!Dean’s infamous red shirt.

-

He’s currently wearing Cas-coloured shoes and sitting in Dean’s spot from 9x13 aka the iconic cornflakes scene in question.

-

“If you can’t sleep, that’s understandable, given recent events.”  
“You mean dying and coming back to life.”

Cas has been around the humans too long. He talks in euphemisms and gets called out by his too-literal son.

The tables turn.

-

Oh Jack… so full of worries about Heaven and if his mom is safe, and making Cas confront that nothing is perfect, even Heaven, and have to say it out loud because he can’t lie to Jack and sugarcoat this.

Reminds me of 13x06 where he had to tell Jack that yeah sorry not all angels are perfect either. Sweet lil foetus!Jack sure picked the correct angel to be his guardian.

-

Naomi is “complicated”

Cas. Hon. *hands him a blanket and a bowl of cereal*

-

OH MY GOD Jack calling him out on why can’t Sam and Dean know about the deal.

Having Jack around is so much a breath of fresh air that Cas is starting to regret ever kidnapping him in 12x19.

-

“They CAN I just don’t WANT them to know” CAS. You’ve been forced to Verbalise A Thing Using The Correct Language. I am giving you an entire gold star. TWO GOLD STARS. I’m drawing a smilie face on them.

-

Jack is upset that Cas made the deal for him: “they don’t need that burden. you don’t need that burden” “of course I do. You did that, for ME” - the ole season 2 Dean thing, where it took until 2x08 to know for sure what John did and it basically killed Dean 3 times over and he was a Mess. Not knowing but not having all the answers and being worried/suspicious about what’s up with the neat circumstances of being alive again is hooorrible. And this is calling out the whole Winchester cycle of sacrifice (conveniently now with us knowing that John will be dropping by for an episode to really hammer the point home) by addressing how Jack now has to carry the burden of knowing that Cas did that for him.

Cas is like, “Yeah don’t worry I haven’t been happy in all of Creation.”  
Jack looks earnestly at him. “I’m sorry.”

Cas diverts to eating the gross cereal, which he apparently also secretly indulges in, or else, as Mittens pointed out to me, Dean does too and either way Cas is being gross and adorable and hanging out with his kid and this is horrible I hate it oh god it’s more sickly sweet than the cereal they’re eating.

-

Garth hiding in the kitchen to panic and phone mom to get him from the party.

-

“THIS ISN’T YOUR MOM, GARTH, THIS IS AN ARCHANGEL”

-

And he’s just learned to say “balls” appropriately too.

-

Sam immediately gets The Guilts because he’s  being leaderly and losing Garth would be his first major blow as a leader oh god oh god no oh Sammy oh GARTH I can’t handle this.

Berens sure is invested in the leader!Sam stuff and telling this story long before anyone else was and had his minion Glynn tease us with Maggie earlier in the season D:

-

I’m calling mom to get me from the party

-

“It’s Ketch”   
Sam raises his eyebrows like “I forgot he was in this season”

Does that mean Ketch skyped Cas first

that’s hilarious all by itself

-

He has tea because of course he does

-

Oh my god he’s skyping with Jack. Are they buds? HAS HE ADOPTED JACK?

Honestly of all the characters in the entire show he’s probably resisted longest so far when it comes to adopting Jack if they ever met even briefly in Apocalypse World.

This is how you can tell he’s the worst :P Rowena “I will never love again” MacLeod took all of 20 seconds to adopt Jack.

-

He’s been in England for like a week and his accent is 100x more hammy. “ExPRopriATE”

He’s rolling his Rs. I mean. Is that even in our accent? Not in mine.

-

Jack watching attentively while he tells his story with no judgement forthcoming, just pure interest in what Ketch says… good thing Ketch is too self-centred on his tale of derring-do or he might find Jack’s sweet interest flattering and begin wondering if he has it in himself to be fatherly.

-

I’m suddenly legitimately interested in the unstoppable force of Jack’s adoptability vs the immovable object of Ketch’s ego.

-

He posted it. Around Christmas. Look I’m friends with a postie and she’s hucking around a bag as big as herself.

-

Maybe he put a ribbon on it.

-

From BUDAPEST. Paying extra really is gonna speed THAT up

-

“Where is our weapon?”  
“It’s been sitting in Guam for a week. I don’t understand. Why is it in Guam?”

-

TFW all react with snark, side-eyes or despair at Ketch, and 2.0 doesn’t even get a reaction because I don’t think Jack understands how dumbass Ketch is because he’s too smol to have fought the mail :P

-

“We appreciate the effort”  
“DO WE?”

Cas is staring into the void, meanwhile. Internally, “Well at least I can be sure I’m not going to worry about allowing myself to be happy any time THIS month”

-

Oh, sweet! The laptop is set up right next to Britain on the map table :’)

-

Hey if they have to brave the post office to get the egg, they can find out Harper is still stalking Jack :D

-

Cas can’t even work out which direction to start rolling his eyes, gives up and walks off. Dean gestures the screen, look what you made him do! You asshole!

-

“Only thing that can take him down now is the full Ichabod”  
“?”  
*gestures decapitation*  
“oh.”

Poor Garth. Werewolves really are the worst. I can see why you were so upset about being turned.

-

Remember when Sam described him as an “ichabod crane alike” or something, I think in 9x12 when asking at the hospital about him? Maybe? I swear to god that might be a less subtle hint Garth is going to die than Charlie’s “merry christmas”

-

Garth honey nooo

-

I’m pretty sure we saw Michael mind-controlling the werewolf in the cold open which means we’re in for SOME sort of drama next

-

Oh good Cas is back, I guess he went to scream outside.

“Oh it would have made it if it wasn’t closed for the holidays” Sam is being so withering I hope Ketch can feel it from Budapest.

-

Garth you are going to get in so much trouble and I’m so scared for you and your family at Christmas

-

At least in this scene Dean n Cas are playing footsie under the table if nothing else.

-

With Michael holed up in a towerblock for Christmas I am so worried that I should have watched Die Hard before getting here.

-

D'aw Dean teams himself up with Cas without even hesitating.

-

Holy shit they used a season 1 clip of the Impala driving past a field of cows.

“Hi we shot this for 1x06 it’s practically an easter egg now”

-

God, it’s the promo scene and we’re 16 minutes in.

Not over Cas being like “you’re happy” because he can’t be happy but he’s seeing Dean being, you know, cheerful. It’s worrying because it’s so close to endgame… if they kill Michael, Dean can be happy. And if Dean can be happy…

bye bye Cas

-

It’s so easy with Dean looking away for Cas’s silence to be “lol never” instead of “I ought to tell you the string that is attached”

-

*quietly climbs into the garbage pile as I think about how neither can be happy while the other is as a literal plot mechanism*

-

Them leaving the door open seems so significant I thought we were going to see Bad!Kaia comically hiding behind it

-

Awwwwww Jack wants to break into his first building with lock picks!!

I can’t believe they’re doing this in broad daylight.

I can’t believe there was a Gish item to go to a post office after hours dressed as Santa’s elves and that’s what Jack is doing with that coat

-

“Who taught you to pick a lock?”  
“I did. And the internet”

Sam’s “that’s my boy” face.

-

“I wanted to stay useful”

that was your cue to tell Jack he’s useful regardless

On the other hand he got the door opened and smiled up at Sam so I guess he gets the validation that way instead.

-

“HAPPY Holidays” Jack is SO PLEASED the box is saying something nice.

-

BOOM you have witnessed, once again, Sam being knocked out.

Wow, no. His skull is getting thicker, he manages to cling on long enough to watch his boy being abducted.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS, SAM.

-

Awww Michael came to oversee it. HAPPY HOLIDAYS, Michael!

-

Sam is way too concussed to deal with this. Or drive.

-

Michael has a really similar coat to what he had in the AU but for a fancy rich lady instead of a badass hot cowboy which really begs the question of why he dressed SO SO OTT for Dean, even given his fashionista tastes for the other 2 vessels we’ve seen.

-

I am sad we don’t have the other Michael vessel just because he’s off making out with Constantine on Legends of Tomorrow (meta textuality of THAT to be unpacked by fandom at length :P), but she’s an absolutely uncanny female double for him with the coat and the ominous camera angles and her general scary vibe.

-

“You’re going to kill me anyway” *MOOSE CHARGE*

I stan one concussed boy

-

Blorp

No fancy weapons for you guys, use your heads.

Not Sam’s head, he’s just taken his 3rd hit in a minute.

-

Garth gets caught snitching though I suspect Michael knew he was listening in and sent Dean to get attacked by Bad!Kaia anyways.

There’s chess being played here.

-

Er, and you’re the pawns.

I think Dean is the other player and everyone ELSE is a pawn in Michael’s reckoning.

-

“WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHAT DO YOU WANT?” Kaia, they just shouted like 20 minutes of the plot so far at each other, you know as much as we do at this point.

-

I love Kaia’s fighting stance but oh my GOD Dean walking up to the spear and having it put against his heart. He knows it’s a power move but it’s also a gentle one, and he’s waved enough guns in her face and our Kaia’s face… This is one of those moves you use both on frightened animals and also to show you are a good unarmed nice guy and it’s an attempt to re-negotiate after all he’s done to Kaias over time >.>

-

“if you’re not going to give it to me, kill me” Dean says, at the end of his big emotional appeal to Family And Saving People as his divine guiding forces in the universe by which he sets his moral compass and acts as the best version of himself in the defence of.

Cas behind him like “I hope this works because I love this dumbass and if you ACTUALLY kill him I’m contractually obligated to murder you so like, pls don’t escalate this”

-

“How do I know if you’re telling the truth” well he’s not so jot that down.

Cas like “can you please stop talking, Dean, I am not agreeing with any of your policies here” because not only did he drag Jack into it, he made a promise that Jack’s completely unable to uphold since he, you know, doesn’t have the power to get Kaia home any more.

Poor Bad!Kaia though. Spent her life running from monsters too. She and our Kaia have the same trama, but she’s so hardened by it :(

-

“If you don’t bring this back to me I will find you and kill you”

Yikes, magic weapons are having a bad run in these parts, I think Dean’s pretty much a gonner :P

-

I love that the Wayward Sisters music plays around Kaia but it makes me so so so so sad

-

“So, what, is he playing us?” he’s playing YOU Dean. Your move!

-

“Don’t you go in there alone.” “I know, drive fast”

Aka concussed bab is gonna go in there alone if you don’t hurry.

-

I have literally no comprehension about the driving times involved in this episode because I don’t know US geography like that, but it’s Berens not Dabb but he’s mentioned specific locations so he better have looked these all up on google maps because this is one heck of a fact checkable episode with 4 distinct known and named locations and you all driving to and fro.

-

I love Michael’s new apartment. It has a dark Heaven aesthetic vibe which is perf.

Jack’s here and he’s immediately deposited under the halo lights.

I can not WAIT for a Jack vs Michael scene.

*chin hands*

-

“Why didn’t you kill me?”   
*eyebrow raise*

Poor nougat is being made to feel useless again :( This is Michael grinding his heel into Jack while he has him on the floor, kneeling in supplication under those halo lights.

-

Michael is into villain monologuing. A terrible, terrible habit.

“Death from above,” Michael says, the first time he’s had halos over his head.

His concept of soul ownership intrigues me because he would get all the humans who died in an attack on this city in his original world. In this he’s turning them into monsters but with his grace, so they belong to him. That means that somehow or other he’s probably overriding not just their nature to be controllable by him, which overrides in turn Eve’s control over all monsters. She totes isn’t dead BTW she’s just in Purgatory. I’m like 100% sure of it :P Anyway I do wonder if Michael’s control over the monsters extends so far as accidentally granting them passage to Heaven by claiming them and overriding Eve’s control. Who knows. The thought wandered by and really tickled me.

Because it’s a long game with the real value in people for beings of this level just being in their value as collectibles after death, and season 5 was all about our Michael getting all the souls by killing all the humans and storing them away in Heaven and that was his Paradise he was fighting for. And if he’s converting entire cities to monsterhood in order to gain control over the territory in a quiet no mess way, then his control and command of them is passed on through the bite thanks to whatever he did to them. At the very least he’s managed to make himself into their new Alpha.

I mean unless this is a phase one and he’s sacrificing getting the souls of these lot in exchange for a lot more souls down the line.

-

LOL Michael pulls “I’m your only kin” and Jack’s like, uh, REAL Michael is in the cage, POSER.

-

I love how Jack’s got the such simplistic child language of “I hate you” which comes out so honestly and fiercely. Jack’s 1 layer personality is reaaally deep even if it is mostly 1 layer. A very very thick slab of nougat. Full of goodness. It’s EXCELLENT character writing to balance a character like this. He has a good understanding of the world by now, evidenced by very clearly being able to distinguish AU!Michael from his living kin of our Michael in the cage, and yet at the same time his emotional range is still 100% whatever he feels about a thing and so for Michael it’s hate. Because when kids get upset they can yell “I hate you I hate you!” in a tantrum, and Jack’s personality is that but moderated and adult and reasonable, and that… What a good approach to writing a character. Om nom nom.

-

This vessel is definitely way more expressive than the previous two Michaels, which is something I’ve noticed in a looot of the vessel gender swaps, which really makes me go sociological on why gesturing and fiddling and so on is so much a part of presence for a female character on screen, while male characters are allowed to stand still and just kind of radiate presence. I mean, she HAS presence, but she’s been moving her hands a lot and it’s the main detail which makes her not match up as neatly. Jensen threw his whole personality into not moving Michael’s arms, to follow on from Christian’s portrayal.

I think Raphael’s second vessel was menacingly still. That actress did a great job. That slow head turn after they hurl an angel blade at her in 6x22… Nice.

Lisa Berry strikes a nice balance at huge presence and only necessary gestures, and Julian Richings was always fiddling with junk food as Death despite his cosmic presence.

Meg was all in the voice and eyebrows, both actresses.

-

Why am I musing on this? Because it’s 7am and I’m having a wave of immense sleepiness and I think I need tea to keep on watching but it’s cold so I’d rather stay bundled in blankets >.>

… I have now turned on the heating and got tea and done some stretches to try and ward off the cold-blooded lizard stupor I was sliding into. Brrr. We get Christmas break on episodes because it’s so hard to watch in the cold.

-

“Our relation is more a matter of scale, power.” Ooohohohooo but you just said you weren’t killing Jack because he was powerless.

I mean I’m crowing at Michael for maybe revealing a flaw in his monologue to me but at the same time that’s terrifying for what he plans for Jack because that presumably involves powering back up but under HIS control. Nephew theft.

-

I say smugly having posted Jack being kidnapped by Michael in Andrea’s Diner for his power/money last week so that I can just ride this one out with a “in before this plotline” raised eyebrow.

I mean I was using a hybrid season 8/14 set up with Naomi still being Michael’s flunky but the important thing is that he was trapped in an office in a towerblock which may or may not now be exactly this one since I have eyes on it and Michael was gonna do whatever it took to get Jack’s share of the company until Cas marched in and saved the boy.

-

Yeah my diner AU has corporate drama, deal with it.

-

NOW we’re getting to the epic speeches. The time that makes mountains. Epic. And Michael is like hey you and me are the only ones left… And as your power returns and grows, we’ll only become more alike. Cut to Jack being HORRIFIED by the concept of becoming anything like his AUncle and losing his human compassion and turning into this evil being that cheerfully talks about how not only to level cities but to improve on the concept.

Finally, we hit the epic tragedy level of Jack’s story he’s been hiding from in other genres from disney to rom coms to cute twee Christmas movies and even a detour into 1800s consumptive child drama to avoid it. But Hamlet’s procrastination has to be challenged occasionally, and so they’re face to face and Michael is taunting Jack with how he might be cute as a nougaty 2 year old but oh dear the terrible 2s are nothing to the terrible 2 billionties.  

-

I think this room even has Heaven’s furniture, as a riff on it. What’s one world to another? One Heaven from another, as Michael says. Find a head office, treat it like a place of power and intimidation and it becomes one.

-

All Jack says is “Sam, Dean and Castiel. They’ll come for me.” Because he doesn’t know much but in his 2 years he HAS learned who fights for him and considers him family, and who he will really set his morality by.

-

Of course if Cas ever allows himself to be happy, then ALL of Jack’s family has an expiration date and no one can follow him through those eons to stop him straying.

-

Also: now eternity has a sense of horror to it. The reminder that immortality is awful and this is what it does to ancient eldritch beings. And as a result, that finite humanity may be better when it doesn’t come at the cost of erosion of self.

To thine own self be true, to quote a terribly mis-used part of Hamlet and yeah yeah I studied it I know Polonius said that and it’s meant to be a ridiculed line. But it’s still emotionally relevant >.>

Jack’s fierce sense of self and family is his only weapon here. Michael can’t cast doubt on that. Maybe fear for the future, but in the immediate presence, Jack has a ROCK.

-

That red coat also makes him very distinctively the only real colour in the room.

Michael is wearing dark blue for the red vs blue coding, but it’s dark enough to not stand out in the decor.

TFW are all wearing brown and tan.

-

I’m actually quite fond of this stupid jock werewolf.

Awkward silences with jingle bells in the background… why are they making werewolves inherently comical in Dabb era, I don’t know. But I LOVE it.

-

RIP the sexy werewolf.

Dumb jock werewolf has already run off, which MAY be a reminder to panic about all the monsters in position, or he might get stopped on the way by TFW in a strategic position…

-

RIP other sexy werewolf.

Both, sadly, as hot as they were, die with amusing riffs of jingle bells to accompany their decapitations. No dignity in death for these fuckers.

-

Sam may or may not be doing a Red Meat by taking them on alone but he sure is in a better position with only a mild concussion leftover from the earlier attack rather than, you know, a barely-treated gut shot.

-

Man I hope Cas healed up the residual damage of that before the end of season 11.

-

Sam is indeed alone as he promised not to be while 100% intending to rush right in, which means that dumb jock werewolf did indeed run off into the city, which means that with 10 minutes left a whoops we let Kansas City turn into monsters cliffhanger might be a lark.

-

Merry Christmas everyone but Kansas City.

-

I mean Sam doesn’t need to rush on the Jack rescue, Michael literally has eons of AUncle-nephew bonding planned.

-

The fact Alex has visible chicken pox scars on his forehead amuses me so much. While Jack fast-track grew in 12x23 he randomly inflicted the pox on himself as part of the childhood experience. Like, oh, I better get all my immunity from mom so when my 3 dads collectively fail to get me vaccinated at least I’ve got that. *boop* chicken pox scars appear.

-

S'gonna be Garth on the other side of that door

-

OH NO IT IS

-

Oh no Sam, it’s a trap, he’s gonna eat you. Oh no oh no you can’t cut Garth’s head off. He’s a Beloved Sweetie Pie.

-

If this ends with watching Mr Fizzles get a hunter funeral I am sending Bobo a mountain of coal for Christmas.

-

Love that universal trope of the werewolf ducking away for an embarrassing uncontrolled transformation that looks somewhere between puking and period cramps. Moonsickness.

-

Michael is the moon controlling it in this case.

Cosmic bodies.

-

Don’t touch him, Jack!!

-

Transformations with glowy eyes suck :<

-

This is just CRUEL to make Garth be like “I’m sorryyyyy” as he charges at Sam.

-

LOL THIS IS A CRYPT SCENE. He’s in Garth’s head!

“You don’t have to do this!” “You can fight this, Garth!”

-

Me, staring at my mess of red string connecting crypt scenes: How did I get to Garth wolfing out while shouting apologies at Sam and Sam begging him to stop when this all started with Dean n Cas fighting over a lump of rock 6 seasons ago

-

Oh thank god they ended it with Sam vulcan neck pinching Garth to sleep after Jack took a rolling tackle at him and Garth ends up still controlled and shoved in the back of the car for later problems.

We’ll file this under the failures section between bros and move on though I won’t deny Berens had me in a cold sweat that I was going to have to throw years of work out because Sam would grab Mr Fizzles out of Garth’s pocket and soothe him back to himself :P

-

Mr Fizzles x Garth as the Destiel parallel of the year

-

“Thanks for waiting for us,” Dean says, angrily gesturing the alive and rescued Jack while uselessly holding the spear.

-

It’s okay baby there’s 7 minutes left and Cas still doesn’t have fake blood all over him.

I think Mikey might come back around to gloat. He strikes me as the supervillain type to do that.

-

They figure out the last few chess moves that Michael made while sitting on the trunk that Garth is locked in. Rough.

In the background, Cas strides over to the brooding Jack.

Boop.

-

“I wouldn’t bet against us.”

In Which Dean Nearly Decapitates His Brother

-

Rousing family speech about no odds or element of surprise or fear from Michael, and they go dramatically walking off towards the elevator with blaring Christmas music.

I hate this

-

Everyone has a weapon except Jack, who just has a series of incomprehensible troubled looks every time anything happens.

The Boy Is Concerned. But is it about what’s going on around him, or inner turmoil disrupting his nougaty centre?

He looks placid again during the dramatic walk, while everyone else has their hero faces, he’s surrounded by his dads so he can just be like :3 and enjoy the adventure.

-

Michael is bored and pacing because they took too long having broments downstairs and walking slowly towards the elevator and he wants to do this great dramatic turn when they arrive but the elevator is craaaaaaawling up the building.

Fine, what if I’m not by the window but sitting down with my back to them.

Is Michael NERVOUS?

Big talk about being a zillion years old and then getting impatient.

-

What did Michael just see? Because he lit up his eyes and got a lot more confident…

“There… he… is” he smirks.

Me when Cas

-

Cas doesn’t usually nearly get a killing blow on me, though. Nice move, bud.

-

HEY, RUDE. DOn’T HURT HIM

-

I know he just tried to stab you but I’m allowed to yell that. Also stabbing archangels doesn’t tend to work on them but whatever :P

-

Come on Dean, GET HIM. He hurt the bae! And Sam and Jack now! But nowhere near as dramatically!

-

Ironically if Michael had just had any patience he wouldn’t have fallen for being baited into coming to see Cas snooping around his front desk.

-

OH NOICE THIS IS THE SAME FIGHT WITH MICHAEL AND DARK KAIA BUT DEAN AND MICHAEL

-

Ow, Dean not doing so well after all.

-

Is that Sam or Jack inching a hand towards the spear. If Sam stabs Michael then it’s a thanks in return for stabbing Lucifer. If Jack does… Badass, kid needs a big kill.

On the other hand, we’re so near cliffhanger time territory that.. well.

-

Nope, Sam just did the slide a weapon back to Dean thing and Dean got in a hit on Michael in their duel.

-

Same arm he got stabbed on.

-

“trust me, that’s gonna leave a scar”

Jack I hope you are paying attention to Dad no.3’s use of one-liners because he is a master.

When he isn’t, like, “you’re the shortbus, shortbus.”

-

UHOH Michael is standing with aaaaaall the haloes reflected behind him in the window and Dean is having Suspicious Killing Hesitation

aaaand there’s the whooshy vision wow what a surprise

-

I KNEW IT WAS COMING AS SOON AS MICHAEL’S SHOULDERS WENT ALL CONFIDENT AND HE STARTED STARING AND I’M STILL UPSET.

I mean I knew it was coming as soon as Dean stumbled in like ??? I’m not Michael???

But in the short term, argh.

-

WHAT IS THIS BAR

-

It has a moose head, Jo’s shooting game from the Roadhouse, and the old jukebox from 4x01’s diner where Sam and Ruby hung out.

-

Aside from anything else this is a horrible ploy by Michael to get the spear.

-

WHEN DID MICHAEL BARTEND.

I am so intrigued.

-

But yeah, checkmate, Dean Winchester. Snapped your magic spear and melted to magic egg. What next?

-

Oh good and now he has the halos behind his head :< :< :< :<

Wanek I am so angry. You get coal too.

-

LOL Michael giving them a lesson on maaaaaaaybe asking important questions about things instead of just leaving them as soon as a character appears to be functioning on the surface, I type with this paused with Jack in the corner of my screen as a fortuitous example

-

Michael gloating about breaking Dean is the worst Christmas cliffhanger.  I hate you Bobo.

-

You aren’t seriously going to end the season on a snap and make us make Michael is Thanos jokes all hiatus? I mean he already fucked up one planet, decimating it in the name of a better world. Please. Don’t do this, Bobo.

-

He did it.

-

Reminds me of the end of 3x10 as well, with demon!Dean lurking under Dean, waiting until before the credits to snap his fingers from within Dean’s subconscious to remind us he was lurking and waiting.

-

Aw man this sucks.

Now Jack has to murder Dean after all.


	10. 14x10

Expectations: Yockey. Tapping. Rocky's Bar in Dean's head furnished with FBBC logos. Seeing Cas again.

-

Recap - Michael sucks and tricked Dean, with a recap of the violence and Dean's brief optimism of terrible odds but going up against them with family. It's fun to see even a momentary glimpse of 14x06's library fight scene amongst the nonsense just to have Jack in there with being part of the family and all their fights so far. We get a lot of Kaia being a BAMF with the bonerspear (RIP) to remind us of the one hope they had had.

Gadreel appears on screen and my heart flutters. Objectively, I know why they'd recap him as soon as I see his face but even of all the times we've dipped into heads to save people from themselves, the fact that Gadreel is mired in season 9 and all THAT entails, even though this would be the Sam side of the equation, just fucks me up on principle because season 9 was the season that finally dragged me into fandom.

But yeah, we really need it for Poughkeepsie and Gadreel telling us he as an angel is powerful enough to keep Sam locked away in a dream so we have the direct comparison of Sam in his lovely ghoul hunt with cheerleaders (and I kNOW I've talked about that dream a few times in Dabb era about actual MotW such as 13x06 and how that was Dean's equivalent of ghouls and cheerleaders - for him it was ghouls and cowboys) and now we will see what Michael constructs for Dean... It's handy to establish the meta baseline of comparison they WANT us to be making, especially as 9x10 has had a few more loops since then with 11x18 for Cas and 12x22 for Mary.

Thinking specifically of Dean and his bar though, if you're just following my musings through watching notes, after last episode I got too excited and instead of sitting on the bar just posted my notes then made the last musings after which should have been the final bulletpoint on it all. It basically boiled down to being very thrilled that 10x23's opening deleted scene was Dean in a bar in his head where he was the patron and there was a very busty bartender, and then Cas and Crowley were there. I think there's a lot of mileage in that deleted scene to compare to what we get for a canonically shown bar scene in Dean's head where he is the bartender and eventually real elements of his life come calling, so I'm keeping that in mind too even though of course it didn't make the final cut.

Anyway. Jack and his death and the reminder from Lily that her magic draws from the soul. Jack has shown a very instinctive understanding of magic like in 14x03 where he analysed what the amulet was doing on raw intuition of DUH this is how magic works, WITHOUT his powers to help him come to that conclusion. We see him use his powers in the promos for this episode, so I'm feeling pre-vindicated that this might be a grim warning about him using up his soul and becoming dark!Nougat if he carries on down that path, while others had been more optimistic that his powers were recovering.

(Obviously if his powers regenerate over time and do start to come back for real then eventually they can take over from whatever damage he does to his soul but it would be a way to artificially "age" him, that is, to scrape off some of the soft edges and change Jack's fundamental personality to something even 0.1% darker than it currently is, so as to effect a character shift to write different stories about him, because awesome as dear sweet nougat son is, post-death, that adorable cookie may have run his course as being nothing more than sweet boy and needs to have an edge. Any edge. Dear lord how has this show managed an entire season and a half with a non-edgy character in the mix. I'm astounded but also delighted but also understand this can't possibly be sustainable forever with this show :P)

-

Helpfully, the opening shot is a squirrel hugging the mom/family beer which means that I am murdered on the spot and don't have to write any more notes because I am now deceased.

Dean loves his family.

And then an Aloha "hang loose" shotglass and some Caribbean rum beside it. Please send Dean to the beach, the set people say, begging the writers to let Dean kick back.

This one shot is enough to do an entire still-life character study on Dean, of the devoted taxidermy squirrel on a keychain that has its arms wrapped tight around a representation of mom and perhaps family as a whole but mostly mom... the EMPTY shotglass that COULD hold beach drinks to the other side, if he would let go and we could all go hang loose...

Coupled with Jensen being put in a hawai'ian shirt for those Winchester Family Photos for the EW shoot and I'm feeling very sensitive about how I've been calling for a beach episode since the middle of season 10 and mid-late season 10 Robbie put in that line about Dean wanting to go the beach... I've been suffering for a long ass time and it's becoming more and more main text that Dean's heart is off in a hammock on an island with a drink in a coconut and his peeps all chilling beside him.

-

I have to let the episode play beyond the recap and opening shot but I've been kicked in the gut and reverted back to some primal Dean!girl state and this is much more difficult to hit play than I anticipated.

-

Hello Roadhouse Monkey :)))) As well as a selection of whiskeys including one that's for sure Scottish though probably not Crowley's brand, but I'm still looking and squinting at the low-res labels on my download just in case. Also the fact that the squirrel was in there in the opening shot and it's NAME means that Crowley's influence on shaping Dean's sense of self is literally baked into this bar. But of course the Roadhouse Monkey has shown up in its original home, duh, in 5x16's Heaven Roadhouse as important imagery, I THINK was hidden in some other recent place as an easter egg that was not the Roadhouse but made Mel laugh because she enjoys that demon monkey... And now here it is embedded in Dean's psyche, as a memory of the bar where he first found some found family that in the Kripke era were some of the most important people in his life, and though they're now 9 years faded from canon aside from brief returns in seasons 6 & 7, still are foundational family for him, this is honoured in Dean's bar.

And then we get to see "ROCKY'S BAR" which we all detectived out immediately after 14x09, but I suppose for the audience is the first huge "hey this is Dean's bar" literal sign, followed by a cut to the moose head.

Somewhere, there's a version of this episode where Crowley was still around and came with them into Dean's head, and I want you to take a moment to think of him absolutely pissing himself laughing over this bar because yes he like never ever laughed but I think that would be the thing that did it at last, if he were to laugh :P

I think that's an El Sol beer poster we have a corner of under the moose but I'm not sure, it might be another beer with a poster that has a sky in the background... I feel like most El Sol ads used blue sky beach imagery (wait, cog clunks into place 4 years late... duh the el sol imagery dating back to 2x20 involves the beach. Carmen has always existed as the ur figment of Dean's imagination as the romantic endgame on the beach he's been yearning for this whole time. I have written EXTENSIVELY about to the point that I really can not even bullet point it here, because I am one of the fandom scholars on Dean and bars and beer and wish fulfilment and El Sol deeper meaning for his characterisation, so this entire set was built to torment me personally. Let's just go with me taking the cue from 2x20 and el sol that that's WHY I fixated on the beach as his endgame but it's taken a few seasons of actual exploration in canon for me to begin to put all the puzzle pieces together... For christmas I got an almost entirely brown puzzle with 1000 pieces from a loving friend and assembling it involved holding a lot of identical pieces looking for where they went for like 3 hours without realising the 2 I was holding fitted together themselves and went right into the obvious space in front of me, and when all of Dean's psyche is miserable angst coloured, sometimes you hold like 100 pieces of miserable angst up without realising how they all connect :P)

There might not be an El Sol sign in here because we're literally in the place El Sol conjures, and there's theoretically a beach on the other side of the door if Dean were allowed out, and on a non-thundery day this would open directly onto it in some faraway resort.

-

On seeing the close up of the sleeping guy at the bar I'm not 100% sure it's not another Dean, but sleeping, just based on his hand. I might be wrong. Unlike most of the fandom I do not have a wild hand fetish for all these guys. Having mirrors of mirrors inside the bar would be a fun twist.

-

Oh we're still looking around the bar. SHEESH. Okay here's Death, from 10x23, the fateful Juan(ita)'s that Dean picked to cook tamales for Death and there was a giant mural of Day of the Dead skellingtons along the stage. Here he just has a framed picture of some skellingtons kicking back in a bar with a skeletal kitty. They're drinking tequila shots (3 glasses, 2 skellingtons, 1 cat?) and one is knocking back a beer bottle with a label that may or may not be one of the default SPN ones painted for purpose.

elizabethrobertajones  
round label, red outline, blue text  
JACK's seems to have that sign  
but it might be texas star?

mittensmorgul  
I don't think it's texas star  
I'm trying to read the plaque at the top of the painting

elizabethrobertajones  
okay  
It's a heart  
what's spanish for heart?  
I think it does begin with C  
Corazon  
El Corazon  
the heart  
the painting within a painting is a heart behind the skeletons  
I wonder what that means

(I mean we're in the painting within a painting, and it's showing us Dean's heart, that's what it means in plain text rather than snarking to Mittens as I bemoan that I can't start the episode until I've devoured the opening Dean's Heart Flashcards)

The fact it's connected to the 10x23 skellingtons... Did that episode show us Dean's heart?

THE FACT IT'S ANOTHER 10x23 CONNECTION WHEN I WAS TALKING ABOUT HOW I WANT TO COMPARE BARS... the opening bar, the diamond-themed dream bar with the busty bartender, bloody Cas's accusing stare as the spurned admirer, and Crowley showing up to woo him, book-ending the end of the episode in Juan(ita)'s with Death telling him about the Darkness he'd been carrying and making him choose to kill Sam and Dean then choosing not to and turning the scythe on Death instead...

-

Then we get a slot machine, gambling man reference for Bobby? An illuminated sign I can't make out but seems to have a horseshoe as part of the imagery, and a staged off saloon area with a cowboy painting on the wall and pool table contained within, and I think that's the jukebox (from 4x01/4x15) beyond... Trying to speed up. Suffering. Suffering louder. The Jukebox was an omen of Sam's darkness and conflict with Dean- the red vs blue imagery of the fight and divide between them as he met Ruby and Dean met Cas, and then returning in the background of the diner where Dean was pissed as hell still after the Siren episode reveals about how Sam thought of him - how he didn't think Dean was strong enough and was holding him back and Dean was all pissy like why don't you go deal with this without me if you think you're so great and eventually went with Sam but as much as they seemed better for the rest of the episode, of course we need to remember that 4x14, 15 and 16 flow day by day into each other so Dean's still shaken from the Siren episode by the end of On The Head Of A Pin... Of course the point being, that the juke box is DIRECTLY underneath the moose head as we see the wider shot of the bar, so after the benign lol moose moment, now we see a wider context that the squirrel is taxidermied clinging to its mom beer comfort bottle, but the moose is beheaded and mounted above a symbol of the worst thing to ever tear Sam and Dean apart, and even if by now Dean has long forgiven him and they work as a wonderful non-angsty unit in Dabb era, and wow am I thankful for that dynamic as we've had truly joyous bro stuff since Dabb took over, this scar remains on Dean's psyche...

And oops I was going to speed up.

-

Tom's Tequila. Who's tom, eh Dean?

-

So I got up, got tea, took a walk, didn't scream at the wall, yelled at Mittens some more, and now I'm back. BREATHE, Lizbob.

-

In 5x16 Pamela, in the Roadhouse bar of course, counselled Dean to say yes to Dean (in the end days she complains about it being in the storm out there in Dean's head) and she told him it wasn't so bad and Heaven was full of fun and if Dean said yes to Michael they could all kick back forever in these peaceful little bubbles they make for themselves.

She then throws down the limes which were so essential in the Sam escapes with Amelia and goes into a dream world directly paralleled in 8x08 to Fred's which then became the early example before 9x10 which I didn't even mention earlier as part of the pattern because haha when is 8x08 relevant in Dabb era (the limes weren't even FROM that fukkin episode they were much earlier in the Samelia nonsense)... and here's where I get no respite... throws the limes down on some fucking graffiti carved into the bar which says "DAPHNE LOVES FRED" as a shout out to something more recent which had a deep impression on Dean... And shows that he understands despite his bro-ish behaviour towards her that he did indeed understand that she wasn't for him and that she did love Fred and it was never happening between them, his boyhood crush, this adorable heterosexual unattainable desire... all the stuff we psychoanalysed Dean over after Scoobynatural proved here that his deep down self has it carved into him that he understood the message. And like all the other scars, absorbed it, moved on, but kept a record of it deep inside.

WHEW okay, NOW do I have enough to be going on to actually watch or will they torment me some more if I hit play?

-

Ughghhghg I can't handle Pamela and Dean interacting. I'm just going to stare at the FB Beer Company logos and smile a bit because they called on ghost like they didn't think Wanek would immediately add it to the show and that Cosmic Cowboy isn't the perfect thing for Dean to be serving in the first place and like, tailoring your drinks to Supernatural just means they are that much more perfect when a bunch of them show up on screen IN Supernatural.

The fox one is just adorable product placement.

-

But yeah, Pamela talking about the end of the world and surviving a war zone... No, she didn't, but she survived as a figment that makes Dean happy in his head. :(

-

Matador statue. heee. Wow, I can't even remember what that has symbolism for if any, my brain has frizzled out. There's a tape deck behind Dean as well so he can play his tapes in the bar.

-

NOOO there's the original impala number plate behind his head.

-

He's not dressed right but if Pamela is here would the unconscious guy be Ash? Naaah. Dean legally can not populate his head like that or I quit.

-

OH NO Sam's working a "ghoul thing" in Wichita with Cas... they'll be back tonight. It's ghouls again, that code word for a dream case. But in Dean's dream he's not the one working on it, he's running the bar while his lil bro and his angel go off hunting and he can do something more domestic that he enjoys. It doesn't matter if they're cheerleaders or cowboys, he's happy here thanks.

-

Pamela's shirt says "to hell and back"

-

THERE is the El Sol sign

-

And Texan star in the other window which I think we already covered.

-

Oh dear, is this woman trying to get Dean to sell Rocky's some figment of Michael's, sent to take over whatever safe space Dean has made for himself away from his influence? Is this his last shed of consent? Is maintaining Rocky's the last thing holding back Michael and giving Dean any sort of agency of his own? He did, after all, furiously resist Michael and therefore that shed of Dean that can fight back needs somewhere to stay...

-

"I've never had anything this nice" Babe, this makes the Dean cave look like crap. This is what you deserve and it's full of your life and people and you fight for it with every shred of your adorable fluffy being.

-

Did Pamela just murder Dean in his own head?

"How come you always have a date"  
"How come you always want what you can't have"

just say Cas, it's fine, this is your head, no one is here to judge.

Remember how Pamela groped Dean where our "mystery monster" touched and yes it was grabby even with all their flirting beforehand but it's important to remember that Pamela is a point of a threesome between Dean and Cas in this set up, that she represents the literal Medium (job title) between them, the one who first connects with Cas on Dean's behalf. She puts her hand on the hand print just as Anna puts her hand on it when proxy banging Dean on Cas's behalf in the narrative to compare between Cas and Ruby and their respective erotic connections to their Winchesters, as the aforementioned overarching plot of season 4 that this bar has baked into its DNA.

-

..................

"'Sides, you don't want me, you just want to flirt"

..................................................

Yockey, YOU are flirting with us.

-

Pamela is conjured into Dean's psyche as his perfect unattainable woman - flirty, hot as sin, knows him inside out in all his darkest ways, resembles that time Sam was in his head in a bar in 6x22 with Dumah's actress without using her for a 3rd time to confront TFW in Heaven/their own heads after she literally was there with Cas and Jack two episodes ago reprising her role of hanging out in their conjured safe spaces to get to the meaty stuff. I mean really Dumah's actress resembled Pamela for Sam's sake in 6x22 but now Dabb's just taking us on loops :P

But yeah, for all she brings to the table as the perfect employee for Rocky's, just as Dean wrote Daphne off as loving Fred and not for him and respected wholly in his consciousness, he doesn't pull Pamela in as a hot sexy dream girlfriend to bang. He appreciates her, she knows he does, but they're not ever actually going to have that relationship, because he wants something he won't let himself have, and in the mean time he satisfies himself, even in his dream bar, flirting with the unattainable bartender. Everything about this bar, from Carmen's lasting influence on him via El Sol, to Daphne, to Pamela, screeches of the way Dean manages his sexuality and desires. The careful remove he has put himself to only want the unattainable, the fictional babe of his childhood in cartoon form, who is spoken for by Fred. The dead psychic. The girl from the El Sol advert (and I have a very long essay about how she spirals thematically out into Lisa and 6x01).

What do you WANT Dean and why aren't you letting yourself have it even in this perfect space you've built for yourself?

-

"This bar, this is my dream."  
"Yeah," she says softly.

Dean goes into the back and collects Texan Star, the box that was delivered by cupid in 8x23, delivered to Cas at the Gas n Sip in 9x06...

-

SUDDEN VAMPIRE ATTACK

Oh so the drunk guy was just a vampire pretending to be drunk to get the drop on him only, this is Dean. You need a slow mo moment to even capture the action as he defends his bar like a badass.

Is Michael even sending these or are these just the nightmares he routinely handles, the stress of being a hunter that has him repeatedly mention his dreams full of monsters (I think Yockey even did in 13x05, when Dean was talking to the boy who wouldn't speak?)

-

"What can I say? I'm famous?" Cheesy grin, title card.

This may win the record for the most I ever wrote on a cold open. Because this is really what Dean's life boils down to here in this bar. He IS famous. He's built an incredible legacy and this bar stands testament to all he loves but also all his work and all he's done over his life, the blood, the horror, and that he knows that he can never cut that life out entirely. Sam and Cas are still out hunting. He might be chill here but he is always ready for monsters, and settling down just means that they have a spot where they can always find him and he needs a business associate who's as down with cleaning up the health hazards as going out to get limes in the storm. Dean doesn't get OUT of hunting, he can just choose to stop moving and do something more peaceful and find the day job that suits him.

-

MICHAEL LITERALLY DID ZAP HIMSELF INTO A SUIT

WHERE DID HE ZAP DEAN'S CLOTHES TO

WHAT THE FUCK MICHAEL

-

Oh hi Jack, Cas and Sam missed you guys

-

"You had no chance of winning this," he says as the title card, Nihilism, appears between his gesturing hands so perfectly I give Amanda Tapping the director of the year trophy on the spot.

Nihilism has been a theme of both Raphael and Michael's apocalypse bids back in season 5 & 6 (see also: Pamela), and then Lucifer in season 12, and we talked a lot about Dean's nihilism in season 13 when Cas was dead. Now AUMichael shows up monologuing to Jack last episode about the reasons he feels nihilistic towards his evil plans, that he's so cosmically old and powerful the only thing he cares about is adopting his AU Nephew and running off to destroy universe after universe just to see how they scream. Nihilism has been an emotional theme of Dabb era along with imagery of the apocalypse world, repeated mentions of this world being doomed and the overall Trump's America/and you call where WE come from apocalypse world?? themes. It's a very late 2010's mood, and almost all of Dabb era is post-Trump and all written post-Brexit, which was a sort of early tipping point of the world going into chaos and as 12x01 opened with Brexit commentary written DURING the 2016 election, with 12x05 unfortunately lurking in the episode line up as well, Dabb era is pretty much defined by this switch to nihilism and criticising the chaos engine of our world. Michael is now here to have his go at it.

-

Sam didn't say "hey assbutt" and the only reason I will forgive him for that is that he wasn't technically present when Cas did it the first time, but he DID see an action replay in 11x10 AND Kristen acting it out in 10x05 so really why HASN'T he made fun of Cas for it? Anyway they know Michael doesn't set on fire very easily and it's not exactly permanent damage, but distracting enough for Cas to hold Dean's hands - er, clap the handcuffs on Michael.

Do I go into that it's Cas who does this intimate restraining gesture?

Hrm, better not.

Anyway Jack's just lying around in pain but Cas and Sam silently strategise taking Michael down and it's awesome and I love them and their teamwork is awesome sauces.

-

"Dean's not home" NO HE'S AT WORK IN THE BAR.

You're the ghoul Cas and Sam are hunting. The monster that takes the form of the thing it devours.

-

Much screaming and monster chaos from below. Jack is a smart cookie and goes and picks up their weapons.

-

Listen, I've been thinking all Christmas about how long Garth will spend in the trunk of the car. Crowley spent all of 9x01 in there and that was a couple of days, driving included, so let's see how long that lasts :P

I don't think DJ Qualls is in this episode so they could handle it off screen as they're going back to the Bunker and might just put him in the dungeon to sleep it off as dealing with Michael is one way to save him, but it's so funny to me to think they forget him among all the Michael stress.

-

Uhoh Maggie's in the episode with a bunch of the AU Peeps. I really hope they survive this because that's a lot of monsters to fight and having her in the episode - and Sam delegating the AU Peeps to handle the monsters while they handle Michael - just means more chances she's here to die on screen.

If Michael's power is currently contained, does that mean he can't control the monsters, or do the handcuffs only retrain him from escaping? His eyes flickered out so...

-

AAAAAHAHAAAAA "dump him in the trunk of the impala"  
"but Garth is in the trunk"  
"it's a big trunk"

Listen, that was worth spending Christmas half-amused about it without thinking a line like THAT was coming

-

"I called them" seems like he can still control them... poop.

-

"It's not like any of us can fly"  
"one of us can"  
"SHUT UP"

-

Not Jessica! Another reaper! Billie seems to have sent a different minion to do it... Maybe Jessica was getting attached. I Love how Sam sorted THAT resource out.

Violet is on shift :')

I love reapers. "I want you to know you have my full emotional support"

-

Why can't Cas see her? I guess reapers really are VERY selective. You know. Dabb era. Rules.

(Treehouse with "no buckleming reapers allowed" hanging outside it)

-

Well SOMEONE moved them.

Billie, Chuck, Amara. Not a long list of potential people we know of.

.......

Jack.

-

WAIT this means the Impala, with POOR GARTH IN THE BACK, is still in Kansas City.

-

Ugh, the horror of Michael smugly watching them the entire time. The framing of them moving from hovering fearfully on the far side of the war room just on the instinct of not wanting to be close to this monster that stole the face of their beloved Dean, to going to the steps to the library, huddling in the threshold of their safe space and having him still with his face turned towards them, watching. Listening because he mocks them for whispering when he's a cosmic archangel - of course he can hear them and they know that but this is for emotional comfort as much as anything. A suspension of disbelief of safety.

-

It's GROSS to hear Michael say "Castiel" out of Dean's mouth. Stop it.

Anyway at least that means Maggie is now just on Garth Retrieval Duty and the monsters aren't going to eat them... yet... they're just all heading towards the Bunker instead. Whee.

-

"Put a chair against the door. That will help!" what a supportive guy.

-

It's that "everybody dies" line again, and Michael threatening Sam that the last thing he sees will be this "pretty" face... once again devaluing Dean into his looks, as the exterior of the vessel is all that matters to Michael. And of course the possessiveness over Dean, the gross implications of Michael wanting him only for the body, dismissing him for his looks, etc.

-

"If he can" (fight michael and get him out) - Cas being optimistic about Dean's chances to do it. Of course Cas couldn't fight Lucifer back, but Sam did AND got Gadreel out.

-

Oh no, Dean lives another loop of the night at the bar. :(

Oh no that's a LOT of loops I don't like this. Starting to seem like this is all that Dean can sustain. Once someone's psyche starts looping things it immediately verges on madness.

He gets deja vu thinking about when Sam and Cas are going to get back. He has a very very thin tether to reality, perhaps - just a hint that they are going to come get him.

-

Did they leave Jack alone with Michael? That seems like a bad idea.

-

"What are you? You're nothing" You're not supposed to answer for them, all these characters are in so much turmoil about their identity, just raising the point is enough to torture them :P

-

"A moment of familial weakness" hm. I don't think so. I think Michael's changing what he says because he's trapped, not gloating. He'd still love to have power over Jack. And the fact he's not gloating from within the chains about its inevitability goes to show there's no plan, per se. If he had a plan he wouldn't have nihilism. He wouldn't just be doing shit to see what happens. If things worked out that he had Jack along for the ride, he'd love it. But he's currently all tied up so all he can do is belittle his captors and make them think he's more important than them and that his monsters are coming, because while he had a massive gambit last time, it was only to create more chaos. The chaos didn't pay off well and part of Michael's madness/villainy is that he just slides to the next thing, runs with whatever is happening right now. There's no clinging to a plan or going along with The Grand Plan to watch the world burn.

But Jack's clever and always remembers everything you say to him, which means that he has Michael at a disadvantage because he is the fact checker to the reckless chaos engine. He remembers what Michael offered him before and calls him out on it and that EXPOSES Michael as unstable and shifting, which doesn't make him less dangerous, and in some ways reveals his unpredictability. But it gives us understanding. This isn't bad writing that Michael is changing plans and motives at random. Jack's here to remind us what was said before and keep the story straight, and that's contrasting Michael to the established narrative, and his attempts to wrangle it.

-

Jack says Sam and Dean will beat Michael, without mentioning Cas. Michael says Sam's in over his head and drowning, which is the exact same imagery Dean used about himself in Michael.

"No. Dean's strong."  
"He's a gnat. I'm a god."

Listen to Jack, buddy. Dean is the firewall between light and dark and you don't fuck with him. That painting of skellingtons on the wall of his bar? He KILLED DEATH that one time.

Dean kills gods.

"Who would you bet on?"  
"You don't know anything about Dean"

I love Jack loving how strong Dean is :')

"I'm IN HIS HEAD. Literally."

But not his heart. Not Rocky's.

-

Oof, Michael using how Dean would have felt in earlyish season 13 about Jack dying to be mean to Jack about how sad Dean was about him just now. Jack, Dean was very very sad about you. You were a burden LAST season before he got to know you. And now he's just using what he knows about Jack to taunt him about his worst fears about Sam and Dean. After all, he was there in 13x14 watching AU Zach use them being proud of Jack to try and get what they wanted out of him. He knows how much Jack craves their approval.

Michael gets to enjoy the whole thing of using their loved one's face to say things that seem half-true based on prior experience that they could juuust be what Dean thinks and it seems so much worse coming directly from Dean's face that it's hard to let that emotional impact go when similar taunting from another villain might be so much less awful. Because, well... What if it's true? Dean isn't always open with his deepest feelings when he goes through a lot of conflicted states, like, forgiveness and acceptance especially when there's an element where he was wrong, he's happy to let a truce and comfort settle on a scenario where no one says anything and actions do the speaking he doesn't have to, but it's led to a lot of instances of Cas not feeling appreciated or having room for that doubt. Or for Dean under some influence to spill something he was pretending he wasn't still holding onto against Sam, meaning how can Sam trust that Dean DOES trust and respect him when Dean pretending he's fine and Dean being genuinely fine but not wanting to do the whole apology thing look exactly the same from the surface?

We know how fucked up Dean was about Jack dying, but has he SAID enough to Jack directly, rather than SHOWN WITH ACTIONS how much he loves him? Dean's so scared of saying he loves people that even with family he'd do what Pamela calls out in his subconsciousness - flirt with everything being okay and not say what he really wants except for such RARE occasions as asking for a beach vacation or whatever. And sometimes Dean's fear is that he can't say it or it will tempt fate and he'll lose it. Or that he would say it but he doesn't deserve it, so he'll cling on with what he has but never finalise the paperwork on what he WANTS in a flip of not finalising the paperwork on losing what he wants in this dream he's in.

-

Cas hears what's going on and comes rushing in and then grabs Jack VERY FIRMLY to tell him that Michael is lying and all... Jack shrugs him off and storms away to have a sulk, and Cas is left with mounting dramatic music alone with Michael, which is a terrible conversation for Cas to have with a Michael in Dean's body so I'm stress knitting and typing this and considering a 3rd caffeinated beverage...

-

Maggie having a bit of a hero moment and also declaring herself Team Winchesters Saved Us Now We Don't Let Anything Happen To Them, which is gonna be awful. RIP Maggie I guess :<

-

Meanwhile: Cas and Michael!Dean sitting alone in the room lit only with cage imagery from above and the map table from below.

AU Michael mocking Cas for being a nursemaid, not his broken messed up Cas. Eurgh :P Sooo not ready for this even though obviously since 13x22 we've sort of had it coming that Michael turned Castiel into that thing in his world, and therefore his view on the Cas we have is going to be in light of that.

Our Cas EARNED being this Cas.

-

Mmhmm mmhmm. Cas talking about loyalty and compassion not being a weakness.

Michael accuses him of LOVE for this world and asks him what it is about it (he's in love with humanity) but Cas throws it back at him instead of answering himself. Perhaps it's self-evident that he has this family here, but.

Oh you KNOW Mikey is a bad guy when he disses writers. He says Chuck made billions of failed drafts but there's bitterness that he never showed for his apocalypse, but through Dean's head, knowing about Chuck, he knows that "No. 1 Dad" sat right at that table once upon a time, witnessed the original apocalypse, helped them, guided them, and came back even as weaselly as he was at the end, tried to give Lucifer closure, and even though he fucked off with Amara and abandoned them again, he STILL did kinda step up and meet her halfway after Dean did all the hard work getting them there and mediated the saving of this cosmos.

Anyways Cas refused to talk to Chuck in 11x23 even in all the times they were together, even at the very end he sat with his arms folded not looking at him. We really don't have anything on the record from Cas except for "He left" about God. No personal comment. He's just watching in ever increasing squinty close ups Michael do this monologue, so far not speaking on Chuck's behalf. I mean, as an angel, he's a messenger of the lord and that's how we met him. Speaking because God Commanded It. Or so he thought.

but Michael is way more nihilistic than he is so where's the line, Cas?

Uhoh.

"No that's not how -" *stops and thinks about 11x23 some more* "Why would he do that?"  
"BECAUSE HE DOESN'T CARE"

Hey um not for nothing but we're seeing John Winchester again in like 3 fucking episodes

"At first I thought I'd show him. Be more God than God"

Insert clip of Godstiel

"Now I just want to burn every single one of his worlds until I catch up to the old man"

See the same realisation broke Lucifer but Michael's actually going after God. Once Lucifer thought God wasn't paying attention he still kinda settled on this one to destroy. Michael has AU hopped once, though, and now he's beginning to think on the cosmic scale...

Remember in 12x10 (by Yockey) how the angels grimly predicted that a nephilim being born would cause whole worlds to die? I think this is how it might happen >.> Not just the nephilim's fault, but Jack raised the playing field for everyone, and now something has been unleashed that's not content to stay in its own AU, just like Cas played God and unleashed Leviathan that weren't happy any more to stay in Purgatory once they'd seen how tasty Earth was...

-

"Even God can die"

Not on the CW he can't

-

Oh good the monsters went around Maggie instead of eating her. Hopefully this means the AU Peeps can storm in and save the day at the end of the episode.

-

Ugh then Jack directly suggests he could do magic and Sam is like NO not like that, Dean would rather DIE.

so yeah I think dark!nougat is on the horizon. I mean a lil thing here and there won't feel too different after right?

-

Michael looks smug from one scene change to the next.

I hope I don't have to make the Michael leaning into frame to look smug gifset because it's hilarious and someone better already be on it.

-

"Oh Cas. I believe in you!"   
*GLARE*

Yeah, that's the appropriate reaction I think.

-

"What should I do?"  
"Pray."  
"And make sure no one kills us."

Sam being a lil more practical. Good thing Jack has at least 3 dads to dispense advice at all times so even if one of them is being bitchy another might step in to be reassuring.

Usually Sam.

(Let's face it... always Sam. Dean n Cas are such angsty drama llamas)

-

Sam and Cas wander into what's basically The Empty except it's full of all the best soundbites of Dean's head. Whether it's his dark subconscious or something Michael's bombarding him with as the storm outside Rocky's, the clearest soundbite so far is demon!Dean from 3x10 mocking Dean with "you're going to die and this - this is what you're going to become!"

So all our paralleling of the end of last episode with demon!Dean as another dark facet of Dean was useful as a warm up for the reminder that this is the sort of thing that lays on the surface of the undercurrent of Dean's constant awfulness in his head.

Lovely :))))

I'm so glad Yockey decided to take us for a walk in here. He always has SUCH good ideas for a day out.

"Somebody help meeeeee" Dean yells from Hell. Hey, Cas, follow that sound. That's how you first met :')

-

I really am just sitting here with VLC minimised frantically twisting my hair in my fingers and staring into space trying to cope with Cas and Sam looking around how noisy and awful Dean's worst memories and scars are and Cas is like wow he's scarred and Sam's like duh and Cas is like no I really really hate looking through all of Dean's worst memories because he is buried in a MAZE of awful.

Just the both of them taking a moment to realise how much awful Dean has bottled up in there, even as they themselves have been through so much. Sometimes it's just things that remind you how your closest people have survived so much that takes you aback even when they might feel the same about stuff you have gone through. But Cas selecting all the files in Dean's brain and sorting by trauma highest to lowest and then flicking through them is just showing them all his wounds and none of the coping or healing or time, just everything stacked on top of everything else.

Which of course is making me think about it too and now I'm very sad about Dean and asking myself how Yockey thought it was okay to do this :P

-

Sam is like wait wait wait he's probably somewhere chiller than this. Thankfully D: I need more tea. Or hot chocolate. Or actual chocolate.

-

Sam saying "Dean THRIVES on trauma!" like it's a good thing. Well. No he's not but the context makes me snort.

-

"Let's look through his good memories!"  
*wiggly harp music*  
"I think I'm adorable"

... so the first thing Cas finds is Dean flirting with Victor. Mmhm. mmmmhmmmmmm.

"We're on an actual case involving strippers!!"

Mmmmm HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.

"I'll stay here, hook up with the posse"

HMMMM HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.

... if there's another gay ass line as the next clearly audible thing (and I am not skipping anything that is clearer than garbled speech so far) I have run out of noises to make in response.

Oh thank god, the next was "see if they've got any pie!" which is wildly misrepresented, being the last time Dean saw Sam before he was MURDEREDRERED in season 2

Maybe Cas is flicking through all this looking for tiny weeny blips of light and dismissing them all because they're all immediately followed by awfulness.

-

Hey, welcome back from your ghoul hunt, guys!

And welcome to Contentment.

-

Dean's trying to flog them Cosmic Cowboy that he orders from this adorable brewery in Austin.

-

Cas and Sam are going to have to live with having seen Dean acting like this.

-

Oh goodness, did Wanek make a fake beer sign for the family business beer co and that's the new logo which matches the shape and colour of the logo on the bottle that the skellington was drinking? I mean yeah the pieces all match but have I put them into the jigsaw correctly because from where I'm sitting my math isn't wrong :P

-

Guys don't be rude to Pamela, one of you burned her eyes out and the other one of you got her killed by demons.

-

"You're just a complex manifestation of Dean's memories. Designed to distract him."  
*cut to Dean eyebrow-shrugging like yeah that sounds like me, I have been flirting all day with her*

-

Oh no Michael reset it or Dean's brain reset it to escape thinking about this... either way, maybe Sam and Cas need to play along with Contentment for a minute or two because I really want to see that except for how it will physically gut me.

-

OH NO Dean has the cowboy partitions from 13x06 in his bar. I know I said 13x06 was what happy looked like and was establishing the baseline normal TFW was to operate from from then on out that if nothing got in the way this is what they'd be doing and how they'd be feeling in the good parts of it... But that's Jack 2 episodes ago and now Dean... It's AWFUL.

-

"Get me a shot. With your BRAIN". the best line in the show, I don't make the rules.

-

They're blinding and killing poor Pamela all over again and all she wants is shots.

-

"Well now you got rid of her! You know how hard it is to get staff that competent AND hot these days?"

-

oh no Cas "we need you"'d Dean.

oh dear.

Listen I don't think it's gonna go "i need you" and this is following the 9x10 pattern as far as I'm concerned BUT if we get the True Reverse Crypt Scene I'm certainly not going to say no. But you have it on the record here that I wasn't asking for it and didn't expect this episode to be romantically tinged so I'm putting a big ass pin in Cas saying that but it might just be a pin that stays as a "well that happened" and not require anything else. The Gadreel comparison is very much about personal autonomy and obviously Crowley to Sam is NOT a reverse crypt scene scenario at ALL and so while in context 8x08 served as an early warning for the original 8x17 crypt scene, the mirrors that branched off from it are just a fractal of 8x08...

.... But Cas did say "we need you" to Dean's face so. You know. Going to be hard to wade back into fandom without that being a thing even if nothing else happens from this point on that goes crypt scene instead of road trip.

-

And then Sam managed to poughkeepsie Dean, which of course veers it right back on track to 9x10.

-

Which then leaves that Cas used "we need you" on Dean as HIS iteration of what Dean did to him, while Sam tries what worked when Dean sent Crowley in to do it to HIM. Both trying their approaches that once Dean used in reverse, and finding the one appropriate for the scenario. It's not a crypt scene mirror and so Cas's doesn't work, but maybe we're left just with the fact that it was telling he tried, and also that he didn't commit to the bit. He got as far as "we need you" and didn't pull it over the threshold of emotional vulnerability and confession that truly works in that scenario.

-

Oh, I went to have a bubble bath during our hot water window and realised... It's not a matador. It's a red toreador:  
https://www.homeofthenutty.com/supernatural/screencaps/displayimage.php?album=78&pid=78899#top_display_media

-

Site of the "just so you know why I can't help" exchange between Dean n Cas as well as where they met Chuck, and perhaps fitting that Chuck and Dean have both crafted bars to hide out in.

-

"I remember. I remember everything" Dean changing his gaze to Cas to say the pt2, it has all shades of things behind it in line echoing about singular plural and of course the line being the same as Cas said after he got his memories back in 7x17 but it seems less personal when it's about Michael so I think it's just tropey language use enforcement here :P

-

Oh yay now Dean has to deal with Michael being in his bar. Someone call the bouncers.

Also I've realised what Rocky's is missing. Larry.

-

I love how Michael added the hat in this part as well because, well. He needs the hat.

Michael tries to argue the abuser POV that Dean needs him and WANTS him and they're nothing without each other - his own insecurity about losing the perfect vessel who he's been toying with all season, and the need to invalidate Dean into doubting his own ability to give consent. Arguing back when Dean tries to take control instead of accepting the choice.

-

Then he moves to other insecurities - trying to convince Cas and Sam that Dean doesn't care about them either as he did with Jack.

He says that Dean only tolerates the angel because he feels he owes him - it sounds like speech straight out of the hater playbook denying that Dean could care about Cas and explaining why he's ever put up with him this long.

Hey, don't mock the raised you from perdition line, that's classic and you're the worst.

Like yeah that happened in the first 5 minutes of their relationship - with Pamela around it's a weird thing where it's like for a moment we hang frozen in time in 4x01, until Sam and Cas fast forwarded her back through her fate. And this is the read on their relationship in the days or weeks after Cas first showed up, before they ever bonded. The parking lot of the Toreador Motel for example where Cas gave Dean the info he needed to save Sam from Lilith.

"Since then, what has he done?"  
NOTHING WRONG EVER

(A few things wrong but nothing Dean hasn't forgiven)

-

The camera angle makes the beer thing say "cosmic cow" I say fighting off existential horror about Dean being confronted about his relationship with Cas

-

Yah we need John to come back just so someone can punch him for making Dean so messed up that Michael can even say something so mean about Sam.

(It was fine when demon!Dean said it in season 10, don't get me wrong, that was like a party that Dean was getting to dig deep and vocalise all the ways he'd been hurt :P But someone else saying it to Sam AS Dean? Especially when demon!Dean ALREADY PUT POOR SAMMY THROUGH THIS IN 10x03?? It's just not fair!)

Or, indeed, that Michael can dismiss not just Jack as Dean not wanting another burden, but Sam specifically and ALL of them as not his family but his responsibilities. This goes as far as Dean's contentment seeming to be away from them with no responsibility, but in truth part of the loop focussed hard on Dean knowing exactly where Cas and Sam "were" and waiting for them to come in, and his innocent excitement to see them again and hear about their ghoul hunt. He LOVES them, he wants them around, the contentment was just feeling confident they weren't going to get killed because they're badasses and also that he doesn't have to fret about them, as he does because he can't help it.

-

They realise he's stalling right as Maggie comes running in and honestly i'm concerned that all of them are monsters now but there's a lot of drama going on. I let it run and Dean's playing chicken with Michael and the two of them are pulling some very smug/scary faces at each other and I just realised that Jensen might be playing both of them.

-

Maggie looking over Jack's shoulder at the rest of TFW passed out around the machine: what's going on  
Jack: Well we invented this great party game, it's called Poughkeepsie and what we do is take it in turns to go into each other's heads and -

-

Michael's serene smug face is the worst

-

Someone please land a punch on it for the love of god

-

JACK NO don't dooooo that

-

He did it

-

Dark!Nougat straight ahead

-

Pause mid-fight because we can see the whole painting AND THERE'S A LIL SKELETON DOGGIE TOO

-

Anyway carry on being a dick, Michael

-

OH COME ON you can't trap Michael in - wait

the closet in Dean's mind essentially.

welp, he's pretty much good as in the cage

-

see you again never or else when the next Dr Sexy rerun is on.

-

Hey if the door we saw banging in the promo isn't in this episode, this doesn't seem very permanent.

I mean we see the door and him banging on it, but more shots of him ominously banging on it from within are definitely like... ominous.

-

"I'm the cage"

I mean he held Amara back for a year and a half, he's not actually half bad at being a firewall

-

If Michael has a habit of snapping his fingers to dress himself all snazzy, the rest of the family is going to dread turning around and suddenly seeing Dean sporting a suit.

-

"I didn't know he could still do that angel stuff"  
*Sam immediately re-reads every single parenting book in his head for advice on how to cope with this*  
"I--- I didn't either"

-

Oh good, the answer was "send Cas to do it"

There's 3 dads, one of them will be able to cover it.

-

He's getting so good at the pep talks. I love Dadstiel

-

"It won't happen again."  
"Okay"  
Cas gives him like eighteen shoulder pats and squeezes and leaves, and Jack stares into the void, contemplating what it's like to have slightly less squishy centre than before.

I can't wait for his goth phase.

-

Deeeeeeeeeeean.

Back in the only private sanctum that's mostly kind of sometimes always been his safe place except for a few times when it wasn't but like, not so much that it isn't still at least mostly okay >.>

Just, casually keeping an archangel in the back room of a space he created in Dean's head. And like Jack has to exercise the willpower to never burn away his soul when he needs power, Dean can never ever falter on feeling like he needs an archangel to handle something for him, because if he does...

Well, every moment he's not possessed is proving to Sam and Cas that Michael was lying about how Dean wanted it.

-

Oh thank god here are the camera angles of the scary door banging

-

"It's all you"

Great, I've been reading the rear end of my blog and now I have to go check because I don't remember -

Yep, "it's all you" is the last thing demon!Dean said to Sam when taunting him to kill him before Cas came up behind him and gripped the perdition out of him. That horrible, horrible decision demon!Dean was throwing to Sam - kill me or I kill you. Even though Dean's reassuring himself of what he sees in the mirror, it contains the weight of a second ultimatum underneath it. It's all you...... or else.

-

Billie! I was wondering when she would show up, but that's her superpower... All her Yockey episodes so far, just waiting for the perfect entrance.

-

I stan one Death

-

Actually that's not remotely true, I stan multiple Deaths from different franchises but she's my fave here

-

Also because she's shown up to give Dean a bollocking about universe hopping that we've been waiting for for over a year now. Billie's words being part of the fibrous tissue of the last season or so. That warning has been hovering around all their choices, as they selectively work around her advice...

-

So Billie's straight up breaking the rules now. If she hadn't yanked them out of the tower block, then Michael would have got a head start buuuut she did and now she has culpability in what happens next. Honestly, Billie, the last Death once moved the friggin moon for Dean, so don't feel too bad about it. He was getting really caught up in their schemes. Still this does feel like a little ass-covering ... She gives Dean the way out of planetary annihilation, which now contains a blip of her meddling on it... not technically a result that ONLY would have happened, but she declines to mention that essentially she just implicated herself in the Michael issue by interfering once, and now no matter what happens, it cosmically can be linked back to her rule breaking, as the very specific scenario of Dean keeping Michael in his head is a different case from Michael already being out and about and wreaking havoc having killed Sam and Cas and Jack...

Anyway tell me what is in that book, or I will scream.


	11. 14x11

14x11 watching notes

Mittens just reminded me it's not even Dean's birthday in canon, which I suppose makes it better for anything which is about to happen to him.

-

Oh blergh right, despite him being in the promo stuff I forgot Nick was in this episode. Could have at least not started ON him.

This is one character I suspect even Davy can't work his villain-loving ways on so we're going to have to grin and bear it.

Every time my mum remembers Nick is a thing when we watch she gets mad all over again that he's called Nick because of that being Satan's name and scoffs at it in exactly the same tone of voice I did in my watching notes when he first showed up again in 14x01, and while it's extremely validating and a great example of our mother/daughter teamwork, I'm contractually obliged to dislike Nick even more on behalf of it annoying my mum because of Kripke's hilarious throw away Easter egg of a name given to this dude because he was going to be in like 3 scenes and then never be a thing again back in 5x01, and how are we still here. How.

He's not a real character and he never ever was.

-

I love when Yockey does such a good last scene that the recap can't help but just recap it from start to finish a la 13x05's last scene in 13x06 and now here :'D

-

Anyway then a demon is like wow you are unnecessary to Nick, and Nick is like maybe so but I'm here so I get to stab you in the eye. I do love when Davy shades the annoying villains for even existing, such as Asmodeus and his shitty demons in 13x17. That was classic. This was a bit more subtle, where she's annoyed they can't just work something out all chill because they're both awful people but he's like waaaah i WANNA stab people thouuugh. And she's all ready to sell out Donna because she's right, why WOULD she need to be cooerced to give up that intel, Nick's doing demon's work right now.

-

Aww they still have the book from 2x04 about how to raise zombies. That's adorable.

-

Dean grabs some books and power tools, which is a heady combo. Fuck your nerd/jock dichotomy.

-

After all the wondering, "Damaged Goods" appears over Sam, not Dean. Lol.

-

Mrrrgh do I have the energy to go into the map table being dark, and Dean dumping his bag of power tools on the darkened world and then Sam's sitting there up late being the only person awake in the Bunker at this hour (I mean, Cas and Jack don't sleep but Jack finally talked Cas into marathoning all the Star Warses with him and Dean's low key pissed he turned down the invitation for some more angsty decision making, yet resolved to do whatever this is instead) and Sam's just sitting in this beacon of light in the warm homey part of the Bunker, doing his thing burning the candle at both ends to find the magic research that saves his brother...

In themes of communication, Sam asks Dean how he is, and he makes a very vague shrug and changes the subject entirely.

-

Sam being a nerd about how this book classifies angels "So I looked up Cas just out of curiosity and you would not believe what they say he - "

-

Dean interrupts before Sam can say "is the angel of mutual pining and fake married fic"

-

Exactly how many goodbye tours has Dean been on in his life but also how different is it that he gets to throw a trip to see Mom in to the mix this time

-

That hug was absolute murder and I hate it. I hug my dumb brother from behind like that when he's not expecting it. Except I'm not usually planning anything drastic re: Michael possession, I'm just happy to see him when he now lives far away and only drops by sporadically. And now Davy is asking me to empathise with the surprise of the dumb brother who was not expecting a heart-felt sneak attack hug where he can't see the face of the hugger betraying that they actually mean it despite calling them their dumb little brother all the time publically, he just has to shut up and have affection thrown at him. Ew.

-

Uhoh, AUBobby's not in the episode because he needed a little space on top of the taking some time and getting some space that removing themselves from the Bunker offered D: I mean obviously that's the Jim Beaver isn't here excuse but it's sad because Mary's still obviously working on everything and Bobby's issues can't be solved by just holing up in a cabin and getting affection thrown at him by Mary because duh that's not how healing works, 100%. But in TV land it can be a shorthand for things seeming to be on a path to happiness and wholeness, or of course, Mary has been sort of hanging out at the cabin over Christmas on her own because Bobby has been struggling and she wasn't even there for all the drama with Michael and Dean being possessed, so she's seeming very isolated now. Not just that she should be used as an emotional crutch for Bobby, but that she was getting something in return from that. Finding something that had been missing... And we're 2 episodes out now from John's brief return in some form or another to the narrative. There's a lot of turmoil headed her way and that begins to show here, that her remove since earlier in the season is now coming to its end.

-

ALSO she's having this conversation with Sam, who's checking in with her the next day to tell her what Dean is intending, rather than with Dean calling ahead to ask her if this is okay, so.

-

She's sitting at a table with extra seats, off-centre to emphasise how she's alone and there'd be room for others at that table.

-

Anyway Sam's harping on the hug. "that's sweet" "no you don't understand how emotionally stunted we are about these things"

-

Sam knows where every book in the bunker is

-

I AM SO GLAD THAT DEAN IS GOING TO GO ON DATES WITH DONNA TO EAT THINGS IT'S ALL I'VE WANTED SINCE 9x13

-

Er

I am a Destiel engame peep but you know what if we can't have that, Dean x Donna fills a hole which they desperately both need. Dean literally tells her she deserves better in their first episode after they both stood there covered in powdered sugar nodding about how great the doughnuts were to each other, and it's messed me up forever.

-

They're at some place called Swan Lake, which I throw out to people who know more about that than me, except that Dean has his own specific connection to Swan Lake the ballet from 7x16 which deeply, deeply tickles me.

-

Also he's replaced his best burger ever. New experiences! Moving on from depressing childhood memories of getting burgers on the road to depressing adult memories of getting burgers on the road! I mean this is a good moment. But contextually for Dean, not great.

Still comes across better than his 3x01 cheeseburgers for breakfast moment.

-

"Hungry Beaver Burger Stop: Best Burgers In Swan Lake"

-

"So, Dean -" "Wait let me ask a very complicated question about the other waywards re: how are they so we forget about my complicated how am I"

-

Rule of 3 better get Mary to get the answer from him... That's what moms are for.

-

"Miss I don't wanna hunt, took down 2 all by herself!" I am so proud of her but I accidentally paused on Dean pulling a disgusting face full of burger so that's it on that

-

Not wanting to talk about himself makes Dean a very good listener.

-

Dean... Dean... she's single...

-

Also can see through his bullshit and asks him how he's doing in very snarky terms about him avoiding the question.

-

"What, has he got a freakin newsletter?" Yes and we need one honestly, because every time you meet Jody for like 7 years something dreadful has happened to you and you didn't tell her and how is it only late season 12 where she starts helping properly and actually being in the loop???

-

While they're talking a bell starts tolling which I assume is for boat related things but also reminds Dean he's about to die one of two ways

-

She looks deeply unimpressed by his "i'll be fine" to that, but he blows it off again and says he couldn't come through town without seeing "his D-Train" which it adorable but yeah, re: communication, still doesn't open up properly, even when she has a lot of the tools for prying at him.

-

MORE HUGS

Please stop with the farewell tour.

-

I'm not entirely sure if he said "I'll see you, Donna" or "I'll see you, honey" brb I wonder if Mittens has a TV with closed captioning nearby.

-

I can't believe Mary has manifested another truck, by the way. This one is black, in the John Winchester style. Ruh-roh.

-

Those pumpkins could have been PIES, Mary.

-

Dean's had too many hugs per episode, soon he will explode

-

He wants to be greedy with his mom time.

He says with a tableaux of murdered pumpkins in front of them and Mary framed in a home-shaped arch.

And then he clarifies: I don't want Sam here. Nothing against Sam, he just... is doing a farewell tour and this is his time alone with Mom and it's important to have some chill.

-

Maybe he will mow the lawn for her.

-

"I'm hangry" Dean, you ate like 5 minutes ago with Donna. He also avoids the question with Mary, though this is his 3rd person to be concerned so I suspect she'll break him eventually :P He wants to spend time with her after all.

-

Oh noooooooooooo he wants her to cook something awful. I'm so scared after his description in season 8 of that stew that John used to make. "Winchester Surprise" is a low bar for a family whose cookbook includes marshmallow fluff macaroni.

I like that there even is something he's angling after, though, because we run through the reminder that Mary has only got delivery options and canned food basically, and she reminds him firmly that they had some angst about her not cooking, but he smiles through that and digs deeper.

"I can't believe you remember that" Mary, he has like 5 memories of you all of which are more tragic than the last, that nurtured him through his whole life until 12x01. If you emotionally scarred him with a "I can't believe I fed that to you and John" dish, that emotional scarring is the high point of his time with you and we MAY be about to uncover the psychological roots of marshmallow mac

"And I would like mine with extra cheese"

This may aside from the road food life in general, explain why he's been so happy living off greasy diner food all this time. You know like some rock stars who make it to old age turn out to have genetic immunity to alcoholism and cocaine which would kill a lesser being, and their survival is literally a freak of nature thing? Mary brings the hunter genes and primed her kid long ago, while Sam needs to eat a healthy semi-vegetarian diet to remain chemically balanced with nutrients, Dean can extract all he needs from RAW CHEESE GREASE.

-

That or Cas has been scooping out his arteries whenever he isn't looking.

-

"Oh and - "  
"Pie!"

Now Mom has to pass the "don't forget the pie" test.

-

Dean gets to work with whatever his plan is that he's been sitting on for 10 whole minutes of episode

-

The fucking poster on the wall in Donna's cabin's workshop.

-

"Seems Donna has a type" Shut up you love it

-

Fuck, Dean got a flash of Michael and my instinct was, lol they're only using clips from last episode because they aren't bothering to pay Michael's actor to show up for another -

wait

-

Anyway he approves her music for montage purposes

-

Powertools!Dean sending sparks flying past the poster of the topless guy is just... wow

What is this montage even. The Occult, Power Tools, Shirtless Cowboy Looking Guys...

-

Mary goes to a nearby farm store and gets actual supplies, and also Death Beer. It might just be all they had on sale, but maybe she should get back and ask Dean what he's making, soon.

-

Joe seems sweet so he's probably going to get murdered by Nick or something awful like that.

Mary coming by and only getting whiskey, pumpkins and crossword puzzles has definitely stood out to him as one of those odd customers who maybe it wasn't weird the first time someone came by for that order but now she's been out here for long enough that he knows her by name and that this is her Usual.

-

Oh no Mary leaves and IMMEDIATELY Nick shows up in a serial killer van. Pre-emptively fuck you Nick and also so far Joe is the only PoC in the whole episode so you know, SPN back on its bullshirt if you kill him. Pls let him live.

-

Joe shows the amount of loyalty we can only dream of in a small town farmshop peon :')

Above and beyond - not only does he lie about knowing Mary like idk i'm just a small town peon why would i know, he then immediately calls someone.

Has Mary or Donna saved him from a vampire before so they're totally on the same page? I'd love it if they have a network of locals since they're based in a very small area. Just like, adding up all the survivors of cases until they have a full society of peeps who have been menaced by ghouls but no more!

-

Donna's "Hiya" is the last thing many monsters have seen.

-

Donna shading Arkansas via making fun of Nick's knife... I love her. Doing her job well :') This is why you have cop friends. She knows what's up just because Nick asked for Mary, and saying Mary's her friend, well. I think Nick ought to know she's a hunter now or else he's a dumbass even more than we thought.

-

Donna, don't turn your back on him D:

-

Dangit.

-

Mittens didn't sound like she had any Dire Warnings about this episode in particular and I have been operating on Donna having decent plot armour to survive until the Waywards outlast the show out of sheer spite, and I don't fear Davy murdering faves like Buckleming so it all adds up that I'm a lil nervous about her safety but not TOO much about her longevity... But it is unsettling to have a long time fave in the vicinity of a killer. I can feel the Buckleming rolling off of him even when they're not in town.

-

Also omg Sam hasn't been in the episode since the start and it's 17 minutes in, and we're back with Mary and Dean.

-

His unimaginable choice is joining Cas and Jack's marathon but they're doing the Machete Order and it's halfway through The Clone Wars right in that interminable bit where Anakin creeps on Padme while they're out picnicking for 3 hours of movie time and it's played off as romance.

-

Mary bought pie :')

-

What's Dean up to.

-

Cooking with his mom after cleaning up and setting the table.

What an asshole

-

Mary is rightly suspicious about Dean being domestic with her as he joyfully pulls a large casserole dish from the oven.

-

"Give me some time" she says to a Sam who appears to be already on the road.

-

Oh no Dean's telling funny "domestic" stories about their childhood and immediately gets to John and kills the mood because John came in furious and threw away all their burned food "because it reminded him of you"

I'm guessing by context this is mostly bologna and cheese heated together somehow which... *shudder*

Mary looks immediately grimmer. "Sometimes I forget just how much I missed while I was gone" - yeah, childhood, but also being there would have meant she was at least cooking badly for them and not leaving John to spiral and Dean to be the homemaker for Sam and aaarughgh.

That line is probably going to get spun by Mary haters as her being selfish even though obviously she is reacting with pain at how John behaved in her absence and the entire context of the story. It's not like she's saying yay I would have loved to be there in a grimy motel serving shitty dinner to my kids and angry hunter husband. Her "missing" out is also the entire support system that would have prevented John's revenge rampge in the first place and kept them in a semblance of normality and suburbia as they grew up.

Who knows, Dean might even have been a vector to making her learn to cook better as he got older because he has such a domestic mommy's boy streak (FYI: currently murdering me with it) that I can imagine him hanging in the kitchen demanding to make pies with her and eventually inspiring her to get a cookbook and have some disastrous first attempts with him and you know, gradually heal from her own crappy childhood and maybe grow into being the mom she never actually got a chance to be and they constantly remind us now that she never was despite Dean's impression of her from before he knew she didn't cook...

"How much the two of you -" were raised as barbarians who think marshmallow mac is high cuisine

Like. She knows, okay.

Dean emphasises she's here now, that all that damage is by the by because after all they had their 12x22 catharsis so they know it's not her fault it happened and all

-

"Mom that's meant everything to me" You're talking in past tense please stop.

-

"There's no clouds on the horizon" he says, taking a swing of the Death Beer

-

"Dean, whatever you're going through, you can talk to me."

Dean's wiped his face more times this episode than we've seen him do in a lifetime of gross stuff hanging off his face, and it wasn't even dirty this time. This is definitely a nervous tic because impending death knowledge.

He says everyone's asking but he doesn't want to talk about it, but this does spur Mary to action to investigate, heading out to the barn to find whatever he was building...

-

Uhoh, and a piece of paper with either whatever this thing was for or a dear mom note. I hope just the whatever he was doing explanation for himself to build it at this stage, as he planned to stay a few more days with her...

-

Donna! D: Wake up, sweetie, you have more ass to kick!

-

Oh no, Mary's finding lore books with sticky notes in. She's a smart cookie, she'll figure out what Dean's up to... D:

-

Ew Donna has a lamp made of a deer foot. Gross.

Also grosser: Mary coming out of the barn knowing what Dean's up to and walking right into Nick. Please punch him on principle.

-

Sam sneaked up on Dean which is a really stupid thing to do

Anyway welcome back to the story, why did you wear the orange jacket while Dean is wearing a red shirt and black t-shirt? This is the worst Winchester combo and you're fired.

-

LOL the demons are just plain avoiding the Winchesters now, which is wonderful.

-

Mary gently asks, "Nick, what are you doing?" like he might be emotionally reasoned with. I'm so sorry, but he seems to be on a Buckleming decisions tailspin and even if he's swinging past you in a Davy episode, aka one with appropriate suspense and horror to the whole circus, he can't be reasoned with. Davy's tried reasoning with their creations before but they just spin on again once they go back into Buckleming hands.

-

I realise I was just referring in my own head not just to Asmodeus or Dagon as a Buckleming creation, but Ketch, Lucifer and Crowley, which is just how bad their rot goes on these guys.

-

Once again: "You could have just asked me! This is crazy!"

Yeah, he's on the Buckleming rails and you're just passing through.

-

And Mary claims to have already killed Abraxas, the family-slaughtering demon who did it on Lucifer's orders just as Azazel did to her for her family's manpain.

She's so much further ahead, the Winchesters are further ahead on their healing. Nick's a spectre to Mary of what John became, the rage and madness of revenge, but all amped up on some wild Lucifer shit that Nick is going through to make him the Worst and a borderline supernatural threat to them all. Still, for Mary's sake, right after her sad chat with Dean about his childhood, she now faces a man who is on a turned up to 11 version of John's revenge quest.

-

... Apparently she didn't defeat the demon but trapped him in a puzzle box, which happened in Sabrina and I don't know the timeline on writing as that all came out around Halloween but I do feel like the writing staff watches all the stuff on Netflix so Davy probably knew about that and it seems like bait for him, being all Halloween themed :P

Anyway it raises a weird thing that no one's ever bothered to do before - she couldn't exorcise him or stab him but apparently she knew enough and had the resources to trap him. It's almost like, she had the puzzle box knocking around (from her BMol days?) and decided, yah, today might as well be the day I use this.

Considering Dean seems to be building a cage for Michael (and himself), if I had to hazard a guess at what he's up to, then I'd guess this is a metaphor as well. Lock up ALL the dark John and Azazel metaphors!

-

[takes a 4 day fugue state break on watching the episode because I feel like garbage and I just can't handle the fucks needed to deal with Nick but also can't do the casual watching thing]

-

It's been 4 days and I still can't believe Mary is practicing some arcane demon boxing art that no one else in the history of ever has bothered with, as much as fandom has always wondered if you can trap a demon in a jar with a trap painted on the lid.

-

Mary using a completely different storage place than John did. Aw.

-

Donna's hair is coming loose and revealing some of that Briana underneath...

-

They have a quick guilt punting game as Sam realises belatedly that he just ignored the Nick issue because he couldn't fit it into his caring schedule so he just tried to apply some optimism and move on with his life. Oops. Not the Winchester way, buddy.

To be fair, I believe the Winchesters are the audience POV on many things and not giving a toss about what Nick was up to is one of these things. It has had literally no relevance to their lives, and Cas gave it a go but Nick was mean to him so Cas let him go with an eye roll.

Maybe should have reported the weird smiting incident but I mean there was a LOT going on.

-

Why is there so much stuff in here. Is the fact it has a combo lock rather than a key a hint that maybe other hunters also use this? Mary just plain has not been around long enough to accumulate all this junk. But if local hunters all share it as one of their drop points

-

Hi I would like to buy a time share in a creepy storage locker full of jars of pickled things

-

Heee proper lockers with sigils on them. I'm not caught up with Riverdale season 3 (because see above: garbage sleep state) but I feel like they could just be borrowing them from that show based on what I have seen :P

-

There's probably something symbolic about Nick using a hammer to smash open the door to get to the lockers that the demon is locked in... I mean he's kinda wandered back and taken up the hammer to smash his way through investigating the rest of this stupid revenge quest.

-

Mary making the "i don't know" noise about a head in a jar in locker number one is amazing and I love her and honestly this whole thing is worth it only for having put her in the situation to do that

Next head is "only" in a plastic bag

-

But how does Nick know the little box in a velvet bag is even the thing they were looking for on sight before he opens all the other lockers?

-

I wonder if the plastic bag head was a leviathan and how many more lockers are there like this out there

-

Mary has her anti-possession tattoo on her ribs and that's awesome

-

Meanwhile the others are rushing to her aid but Sam has to ask Dean about wtf is going on because driving is exposition time even when you're going way over the speed limit behind D-Train

-

Oh never mind, it was Dean asking Sam wtf was up with humouring Nick for so long, and I like that it's a meta commentary on Dean being pissed as hell that Nick is even a thing this season, while Sam is making a weak defence on behalf of "but theeeemes" and Dean's like you got to know when to walk away!

That's more surface level shade than when the dumb demon minions were playing cat videos and Ketch waltzed past them

-

It's also a PERFECT opportunity for Dean to get irrationally annoyed about Nick and deflect from anyone asking any weird questions about his behavior, vis a vis missing books from the Bunker and why exactly Sam knew to leg it up here, because he sure wasn't tipped off by weirdness about Nick, all of which spiralled in the last fifteen minutes of their lives.

-

[2 further days later... hello again I have a clear head!!]

-

Nick goes and kidnaps the security guy from this place and Mary's first instinct is not "omg this guy will get hurt" but that the demon could kill them... I mean, sorted priorities and all but it comes across cold... Maybe she's appealing to Nick's potential psychology if she thinks he's a run of the mill psychopath, but he's also on a revenge mission and we've seen that's just a death wish >.>

-

I don't like this theme of Nick beating up Mary and Donna when they try and stop him being an ass

This time there's a really nasty shot of him standing over her which is all dominance. Mary should have punched him in the nads like she did to Ketch.

-

maybe this puzzlebox predates electric drills

-

The demon is immediately a creep and honestly I think this is why you keep puzzle boxes, to teach dudes a lesson. You're going to be weird? Into the puzzle box with you.

-

Asking Nick to murder someone isn't exactly a great ask... All the bad guys are being so unimaginative :P Nick like hurr blurr I'm going to tie up a demon and torture it for information it wants to give me, and Abraxas like hurr blurr I'm going to ask the murdery guy to murder someone who was already pissing him off and probably on his list as soon as he got what he needed.

There's just no emotional stakes between the villains, you guys are all going through the motions being evil because you think it's what you're supposed to do :P

-

The boys!!

-

And Donna!

-

She didn't get to do a cool entrance, she's just here now

*adds this to my extremely heavy dossier of things that casually get looked over for Donna which wouldn't be a big deal except if you read my Wayward Rewatch notes then you know I'm kinda still sulky about that and then 13x11 wasn't exactly great with the wrap up and Wendy and all and it seemed like everything got cut for time*

-

lolllll and then Abraxas confirms what I could have told Nick yeeears ago if he'd just come to ask me, which is that Lucifer killed his family to make him sad enough to say yes, and this whole thing was a miniature version of the Winchesters being manipulated for generations, but only picking some useful dude with enough of whatever makes vessels work to not explode on contact and that was pretty much it.

It especially stings hanging out with the big ole fated bloodline family who really were picked for important purpose and even if both things suck, Nick doesn't even get psychological manipulation in the form of delusions of grandeur like being told he's the Righteous Man or whatever (even if Dean never exactly went for that of course) he's just like.. nah.

Cosmically, you suck.

-

While that seems fairly obviously Nick's story, it's extra special to have it come in a Davy episode because aside from what even I with a week-long approach to watching this can tell is good pacing and tension we also have the sense that he's getting to rub it in that Nick is extra useless in the narrative and he's only here for nepotism reasons

-

Anyway we're about to have some big drama fight but then Nick stabs the demon, gets some of his revenge but like, now he has to contend with the fact that the orders came from Lucifer, who he has this whole messed up thing with - whether the psychological ramifications of that ever make it past a Davy episode who knows but it's a thing at least :P

Also: no hero stabbing the demon moment for him - he caused so much trouble on the way to it that all these hunters who might have helped him are just pissed as hell, especially since he was all in on the murder Mary plan.

Like, sure for HIM that was the conclusion of it, but for US, he's been the actual MotW this whole time and that's sure as hell how the fam is going to treat him.

-

That's not how you use an angel blade, Nick. It's not a swipe-y weapon. What are you doing.

-

Donna gets a niiice shot in on his leg, and Mary gets to punch him out

#girlpower

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Is donna really arresting Nick as a civilian? Like, sure he's a wanted serial killer and I suppose they would have thrown holy water on him just as a precaution but... There's a whole thing going on here.

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What would happen if you dragged Nick into court to testify and he was like yeah the sherrif who arrested me is part of a weird demon hunting survivalist cult

I mean, if nothing else, insanity plea, but how much trouble could he cause for Donna even within that? D:

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Dean's like you okay and Mary is like UGH I have avoided this for like a week but now I have to ask you about whatever you were doing in Donna's workshop

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Sam quickly drags attention away from her umming over how to bring that up to have a chat with Donna and Nick

All Sam can ask is a bemused "why" about Nick repaying his kindness like that. Considering no one's died on Sam's watch yet, only near-misses, this is the first big failure of Leader Sam set up by what he was micromanaging in 14x01. Not just that he let Nick go and forgot to go look for him, but he was relating to him as another former Lucifer vessel and thinking he might be able to help him through that all.

Nick says he would have done the same to revenge his family and well season 4 but that was very different circumstances when it came to all the dark stuff Sam was doing, as it was all manipulated to be very righteous and path of good intentions, and he never got into being a serial killer himself.

I guess as someone who's always had an interest in serial killers, he's getting to meet that dark shadow version of himself who was in the same situation and started doing horrible things just because, while whatever in Sam brushes up against the subject to make it interesting to him is also a part of Sam that is completely 100% sane and sensible about, like, NOT just going and murdering people. As much as he can see the dark mirror to what they do in what serial killers do, he knows the line and Ruby even couldn't make him cross it for fun and she was by far the person who got him closest. I mean demon!Dean was way more murdery even than soulless!Sam in personality - every version of dark Sam is still a good cookie even when he's the actual worst, and that's just hilarious and why we love him. People mis-remember soulless!Sam as his 6x09 personality as a blanket version. But even the fact that's what we could get out of him...

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God I can't wait to see Soulless!Jack

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Anyway Sam's such a sweet cupcake he apologises to Nick for his murder rampage because he didn't/couldn't help him

Nick's an ass in response but Sam can chalk that up as Nick being Nick not that he's right because 1: narratively, yes, Nick reflects on Sam the most, 2: he so totally is broken and legit has the Lucifers as a disorder which means that they did have some responsibility to help him where no one else could

Sam gets a goood comeback about how he's not crying over Nick and being all personal about that, he's crying over his murder spree.

"You can burn" Yeah Sam's totally into the serial killer thing with a sort of justice slant to the whole thing. Lawboy strikes again.

Sorry that was a very flippant character analysis but after 10x14 there was a bunch of fandom back and forth about what Sam even got out of the whole serial killer thing and there was a chunk of fandom like uuuhhh he was studying law??? Maybe he wanted to catch and punish these guys if he wasn't going to be catching monsters with the ole family business???

Which is a weird thing to be vindicated about but I have a long memory for fandom feuds, unfortunately :P And also means I feel like there's already a good chunk of character analysis meta out there about Sam and serial killers and this is just adding to it/making it more obviously canon exactly what Sam has been getting out of it since the only canon commentary so far has just been Dean teasing him about it, and that putting Sam on the defensive over his interest instead of actually opening him up about it.

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We'll probably get some in-depth character reason for the history podcasts in 3 seasons to spite Dean's teasing

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Meanwhile: Dean nods in quiet acceptance that Mom is here to stop him from keeping secrets from Sam, and laying down declarations that this will be heard in the private court of their family and he can't stop her, because this is what Moms are for.

THIS is what she is bringing to their dynamic that they never had in previous seasons. She'd have busted open Sam's demon blood thing in like 2 episodes and booted Ruby out on her ass :')

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Mary vs OG Bobby. Nice.

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Lol Sam like, "Dean that box is impossible to build" and Dean's like "bitch have you met us."

And hey if it's good enough for Doc Benton it's good enough for me.

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What is it with this family and chucking things in the Marianas Trench. Cain, Dean...

No Crowley around to go knock on the lid and ask how he's doing.

Anyway. It's littering, you assholes. Even when you are the litter. ESPECIALLY when you are the litter.

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Sam and Dean resume the 10x23 argument about Dean getting punted into space

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Has Dean considered that the enormous pressure of the Marianas Trench might crush the box and release Michael?

Or, like. Rusting. He built it from scrap metal in Donna's shed, rather than order fancy materials that deep sea explorers would approve.

Your plan is terrible, Nick just got through a puzzle box with a drill.

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Sorry, he's having a really emotional speech but it's painful so I keep pausing to come back and be like, dude. Find a cold war bunker deep under a mountain in Nevada and shut the door on it there. Climate controlled and if anyone ever comes and finds you there's bigger problems :P

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"I love you for trying" I think this is the first non-drugged, non-angry time Dean's ever said that he loves Sam, although it might be a plural you as he said Cas and Jack as well before getting back to Sam. Look, I'll take it, it's been 14 years and he hugged Sam and freaked him out so much he called his mom and said they never hug unless the world is ending, which is the most tragic summary of their lives I have ever heard.

This is still an end of days situation but at least it's the sort of open honest communication they completely fucked up when having the original Doc Benton conversation, or the one in 10x23.

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Also how is this the 3rd time they've had this conversation.

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Oooh Billie told him how to make this super goth coffin. Figures.

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"Since when do we believe in fate" Well YOU have forever, it's always been Dean trying to argue you down about it. That "we" is 100% passive aggressive. Like, Dean, you always do this and now suddenly it's your FATE to live in a box for eternity?

But Death has always had a way of getting to Dean - the one certainty that's haunted Dean forever, even while everyone's been trying to shove immortality on him, but Death has been a very constant... friend?

Well anyway, when Billie says something Dean takes it as business.

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"You're the only one that could have talked me out of it!"

Dean for sure watched A New Hope with Cas and Jack before heading off to get his books and say goodbye to Sam. That's why they're watching it in Machete Order - Dean wanted to say his goodbyes to them and like hell was he going to watch The Phantom Menace as his farewell movie night.

Plus: they paused the movie so Cas could finally share how he once used the "Wookie" plan successfully and also that he was the Wookie

Minus: this conversation with Sam sucks as he calls Dean out and I have been emotionally gutted and even fluffy headcanons can't help.

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It is pretty much 10x23 though because Death set this all up and now Sam's trundled in like hey, I wanna keep hanging with my brother no matter how much of a danger he is to reality and Billie is like, you bitches think I'm going to be in the room with you when you do this? You just remember me by this badass coffin and I'm going to be chilling over here with Jessica and Violet yelling in the veil about how much you suck as we share a bottle of absinthe

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I mean fair dos, Sam trying to handle living while knowing Dean's bored to tears in a box somewhere.

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"Alright"

...

Listen, this was great and all but there's a Buckleming episode next and then we celebrate the 300th so I know there's eighty billion plot twists coming up in the next 40 minutes of airtime so I'm just gonna sit back and see how that goes.

I bet Sam can't even get that coffin to a port before something Buckleming-y happens.


	12. 14x12

14x12 watching notes

Plot twist tally: ///// ///

-it was all a dream  
-Sam told Cas behind Dean's back between episodes  
-enochian on the bodies and Sam decides to randomly do a case to stop Dean punting himself in the ocean  
-convenient enochian tattoo  
-now prophets are involved  
-Tony idiot ball  
-Sarah's ghost's unfinished business  
-donatello is easily curable (for no discernible reason on the main plot they just wanted him back)

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I super don't trust any episode that shows a brief montage of random monster hunting before I can even click pause that also includes a shot of Sam getting attacked by clowns. While I doubt that has story bearing it's always something which they throw in when they want to remind us of whee back to basics wackiness, which I refuse to trust in the context of a Buckleming episode, especially since this one has a grim past episode to follow on from and a billionty plot twists to get us to the 300th... Aka, talk Dean out of punting himself into the Mariana Trench and staying there for eternity in a sulk. Last night in conversation with Mel I decided to keep a tally of how many abrupt turns the story took, and I'm still thinking of random things about this episode that don't quite make sense as a smooth follow on. Someone said Nick was in this episode again even though Davy gave it his best "let's put this guy on ice" gesture.

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Punt Buckleming into the Mariana Trench 2k19

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Er, anyway, that's my expectations for the episode, I suppose.

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I go back and forth on if the writer or director picks the recap but Buckleming episodes always make me feel like it's for sure the writers, as we got a ton of unnecessary Nick, and then a brief reminder about Dean and his coffin, and honestly, there's NOTHING else going on in the story right now, why was that so pointlessly long instead of focusing on Dean's decision and emotional state?

Grumble grumble early morning watching notes

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Hey, Dean made it to the bottom of the ocean! Episode over.

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I mean the fact there was light and he hasn't exploded into a pancake from pressure issues kinda suggests he's like 10ft underwater so maybe he's trying to get out because he knows he didn't sink to the bottom and he needs to swim to the surface and get Sam's attention and try again.

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"I knew we should have hired an oceanographer"  
"Google said this was a good spot"  
"HOW do you have wifi out here. How."

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Oooh it was all a dream, that makes a lot more sense.

"Sam, I had the worst nightmare that you couldn't fucking find the Mariana Trench"  
"Dean, I -"  
"It's 69 kilometers wide, Sam."  
"Nice."  
"That's not the point."

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Honestly the fact Sam was coming from the bathroom probably means that his flushing toilet noise and creaky motel pipes gave Dean the nightmare so he's responsible for this.

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The poor motel people are going to find the scratched up bloody wall and assume the worst

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Excellent wallpaper in here, by the way. Dark and bubbly like underwater vents 10,994 meters under the sea but also evocative of chains. Good Waneking.

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I am assuming that Sam telling Dean that Michael could cheerfully keep him conscious and alive for eternity in a coffin is his way of talking him out of it, not risk assessment in general.

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You can tell Sam and Dean are old because they're both getting up to pee in the night these days.

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A random aside to a possibly occult serial killer just doing some thing with a tank of water. Given the context we have to assume poor summer dress in January lady is a Dean parallel because drowning and stuff. Something kinda accidentally bridal about her, especially as she got bridal-carried to the pool. Beyond that, I got nothing.

I mean, Dean and Michael in a grim marriage of til Death do us part among the crustaceans and marine exploring pods of the Marianas Trench.

"Incredible, we're finding orange soda cans from 1988 and also this metal coffin with horrifying symbols drawn on it down here at 10,898 meters. Truly, humanity are the real monsters."

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Oh boo hoo Nick

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Unbelievably, Sam and Dean are pulling over in front of roadside bathrooms again. I'm actually getting concerned about them.

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Dean triple-checks that Sam will punt him into the ocean, now with the additional context that we know Sam was up in the night telling Dean horror stories about zombie worms and hatchet fish.

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I can not believe that Buckleming emotional continuity (that is, discontinuity) means that after last episode firmly established that Dean would believe Sam of all people would talk him out of it, now he's in a position where saying goodbye to his husband and kid are way more of an issue than his brother, who's chilling with him again like same old same old formula curse. Honestly, he should have just grabbed Jack, who possibly still will do anything to stop Michael and may or may not be down 5% of a soul anyway, and taken him to see the Pacific Ocean and then someone would be along who would have all the nerd facts about fish and oceanography and also be ready to throw him in for the greater good, then start a new life at sea.

Anyway it means that despite the set up that Sam was Dean's perceived biggest emotional hurdle last episode, he actually already passed it with both Mom and Sam, you know, the people responsible for pulling him back in 10x23, and now the fact that he hasn't told Cas is a much bigger issue than that Sam knows and is gloomily along for the ride. I was being flippant about taking Jack to do it but honestly if Sam was so much of an issue and the formula curse wasn't intact, then the logical thing for Dean to do would be to enlist husband and kid to take him to the ocean before brother could find out.

And now it just sets it up so that they're next and it's like, is he even right that Sam can't talk him out of it, but he won't even face the others for the goodbyes, and maybe he gave them weird off-screen hugs like he did with Sam last episode but he can't face seeing them knowing about his plan and how they react to it... Like... It was saying last episode there were mountains and molehills but it's not even making the molehills into mountains in the way the idiom normally goes but revealing that they might actually be the mountains after all? Idk.

I should not be doing this on 1 cup of coffee given my recent dilapidated state.

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Sam I swear to god, you need to phone Cas.

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[IASIP title card: "Sam phones Cas"]

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"Were you able to talk him out of it?" OooooooooooOOOOOOoooooOOOoooo.  
"No, so I'm counting on you."

This is for sure Sam saying to Cas to knock Dean out and tie him up in the dungeon and not even for fun. I love that he's already betrayed Dean and told Cas, and that he saw Dean's face as he told Sam that he was the only one who could talk him out of it, and then immediately thought, "hm, I better call Cas and see if he can talk Dean out of it."

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This is one of those rare times where the admission that they don't bother reading the others' scripts plays into our hands with Buckleming

*Sam furiously shovels his mountain onto Cas's molehill*

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And so Cas asks if he can talk to Dean and Sam's like nope he's beyond reason, he's gone.

I mean, MAYBE Cas won't be able to do anything (hey, wait, this is a TJW-directed episode - if Cas DOES talk Dean out of it, that fucker will frame it as a crypt scene and there's nothing any of us can do about it :P) and this will all have been for nothing, but now we also have at the start of the episode, the typical set up for these things where it's like NO YOU CAN'T and then that being again something where there's just a weight of expectations for subversion, or at the very least, Cas now being tasked with something where Sam and Dean both explicitly have said that this is how things are, and Cas is now up against the challenge - research and Rowena have failed, but maybe he can try talking? And he's told, no, it won't work. So then of course giving us expectations within the story that this is the only un-tried method but the one they all just assume won't work, and yet it's the only option that Cas seems to have before him.

This is Buckleming so I'm not getting my hopes up for tight plotting rather than sundress lady flying screeching out of left field and knocking Dean into the alternate universe of the 300th episode at the last minute, but at least if things were written well, this would be a very hopeful sign that Cas might be able to pull something off on the whole emotional appeal thing. TJW as director honestly gives me a whole other hope where perhaps I ought not to be so excited about it but given his history it's hard not to count it.

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This guy is muttering about striking down the first born of Egypt or something wild while hog-tying and murdering people. Er. Let's just see what happens I guess. For the record of evoking late season 8, Cas was canonically involved in that and Buckleming do like wandering over Edlund territory.

But this dude is executing judgement on behalf of the gods of Egypt... Idk if Osiris or Anubis is meant to be doing something about this... Seems suspect to be here right now the same season Anubis showed up, so maybe Heaven hiring him as a temp has caused some cosmic unrest this guy is into.

Do I count this as a plot twist? I guess if Anubis does get dragged into it, then yeah.

Anyway this victim also from the shot of his flailing feet is wearing slim jeans and boots with a lil heel just like Dean's so once again the victim getting judged has a surface level Dean parallel.

If he's gonna be functionally immortal in his box under the sea with nothing but anglerfish and giant toxic amoebas for company, does that mean he's skipping out on his judgement as a first born and this bloke is just trying to redress the balance?

Is he going to completely miss the point and as he seems to be skulking around docks, see Dean as a first born when they show up to charter a boat for said ocean punting, and snatch him, completely unaware of the mess he's getting into with that?

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Again with the chest carving, Buckleming. What's your issue?

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"I am the lord," the guy mutters, under a light bathing him with a halo.

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Oh my god they do literally just have a trailer hooked up to the back of the Impala with the doom coffin on it

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Should Dean even be driving

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More tearful farewell speeches. Wheeee.

Dean, you might not have been the greatest brother but you were also mom and dad so that makes up for it...

And ahaha moments before John is back in their lives, Sam's re-emphasising for us how Dean was often the ONLY one there for him. You know, when they were kids, and John was supposed to be raising them?

Dean apologises just for keeping the peace - the conflict from 1x20 comes to mind that this is what was the example of the dynamic before Sam left to show us how the Winchester men operated together, and Sam spent at least 3/4 of the episode wildly frustrated at Dean for exactly this - losing his autonomy to John.

Something that after John's death, never, ever got talked over despite the dramas of familyhood that came up between 1x20 and 2x01 that should have been addressed and critiqued - it was constant movement and Sam and John just barely learning to bare minimum function, and neither Sam or Dean really analysing their behaviour in the dynamic well enough for clear progress, despite milestone moments, and then bam John was dead and they had a whole bunch of other stuff to angst about, and debating Dean's autonomy under John really just got piled into all the buried stuff in Dean, only to blurt out in horrible moments like 3x10 instead of being discussed between him and Sam calmly like this...

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Oh my GOD and then Dean gets into how John would send him away when he really pissed him off - that is, 9x07 and how that was in the end really not something that came across to Sam in the same way that we got it from Dean's memories... And even all Sam discovered and was told in that episode didn't add up to a fraction of the picture we got of how John had treated Dean.

All this communication is probably giving Dean hives.

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Honestly the fact that they've been through this so much means that he's really honed the art of deathbed apologies to really get to the meat of stuff that makes Sam openly weep.

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Great, now Nick uses needing to pee as a way to get free.

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My google searches are all over the place. Marianas Trench. Iowa. I assume they're driving down to avoid Jody but as far as I can tell going through Iowa means dropping by the Bunker again or getting dangerously close to it before turning towards the pacific coast.

I still have no friggin idea what's going on with the plot but now there's enochian on the dead bodies despite how he was muttering something about the Egyptian gods. Do I count Sam's decision to do one last case to distract Dean as a plot twist now all these elements are involved? I think so. This side plot is getting very convoluted right as it hits the main plot

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Theeeemes: this guy has a twin, for all the images of doubles that are going around in general on this show.

The dead one is the big brother because he had 4 minutes on his twin, and as a 1 minute me-time twin, I heartily approve of this decision making and spurious claims to age superiority.

I guess they also use twins because it's the mostest awful way of showing losing a sibling, when identical twins are like, clones of each other, and the implications of growing up at the same time making them extremely close and it's often taken more for granted in the media that this is a Very Special Bond, which Sam and Dean relate to perhaps more than normal siblings.

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Wow that's some convenient enochian tattooing, brb knocking another tally off

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Cas's "DEAN :D" moment is very sad and I want to unsee that expression.

"It's so good to hear from you!! :) :) :)"  
Dean looks surprised that Cas cares so much "er okay um good?"   
How dare you be alarmed at affection from your adoring angel who doesn't want you to punt yourself into the Marianas Trench.

Maybe he's just surprised because Cas's tone is usually so measured and gravelly, and peppy Cas is an alarming concept all by itself, if you don't know his motive to be so relieved he gets a chat with Dean.

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Btw Dean started this with "angels aren't the only ones who know enochian" and yeah Sam was casually reading it moments ago, and of course the implication is that something else out there is probably doing it - I mean we've seen Lily this season after all - but then we go from that line to Dean calling Cas for help, which sort of sideways implies that Cas isn't an angel. Or at least to them he's so much "a Winchester" than being an angel is really just an old side gig of his.

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Never, ever ever give Cas a secret.

Like shut up about lying and betraying them for a whole year, Cas. If Jack got a kitten, they'd walk into the Bunker and you'd say "Hi welcome home, watch out for the litter box under the stairs".

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Cas immediately starts laying into Dean with the whole you are making a terrible mistake thing as soon as Dean corrects his happiness.

Like, dude, he was this close to being grabbed by the Empty. Maybe it's for the best.

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Sam just like "i'm going to get it in a minute" sighs.

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"Thank you and -" look after yourself? look after the boy? look after Sam? no - it's... it's more. I love you - "It's good to hear your voice" *hasty hang up*

Whoof that was a pregnant pause as Dean worked out how to sign off on Cas. That was a "this isn't goodbye" comment but he may still intend to avoid Cas and leave it on a less grim note, since he's saving all his morbidness for Sam.

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Anyway, yay, prophets, brb plot twist tally

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Sam defends his decision with "it's Cas", which reminds me again of Sam defending Cas in 8x22 to Dean and almost kind of reminding Dean of how much Cas means to him and how he should be involving Cas in his suicide mission. Like, Dean, you don't know how much you love Cas so I'm gonna do the hard work for you, dumbass.

And again not to devalue Sam n Cas, a blessed dynamic and so important in the last couple of seasons to show that they've recovered from all their previous bullshit and really are a functioning team that doesn't lie to each other and often in fact have each other's emotional backs when Dean is otherwise incapable. It's hugely important that these days Sam is ready to immediately defer to Cas even when Dean says not to and that they have a constant communication going when Dean is being a dumbass about something like punting himself into the ocean or just generally being possessed by Michael. They don't completely fall apart in the way they used to, though they need Dean long-term.

And yet, this is now being played as Sam is in on something and Dean's put up a wall between himself and Cas, and so once again Sam is not in the same position of having emotional bullshit with Cas, and because of that, everything swings around to being about said emotional bullshit, and we have Sam and Cas communicating, Dean and Sam communicating, and yet Dean won't communicate with Cas properly and they have miscommunications even within this conversation and Dean struggles with his words when Cas expresses positive emotions towards him, and can't have the conversation they need to have.

Like, we're clocking great Sam and Dean and even Sam and Cas stuff for character dynamic building and emotional exploration, but the story is sucking up all that into being about Dean Having An Emotional Bullshit With Cas, while the better understood dynamics are running along doing what they should, even with Sam and Dean now being more functional than Dean n Cas. And again, I always have to be suuuper cautious about Destiel expectations, and interpreting the narrative about them is something that I've become more and more careful and thoughtful about, but this really is putting that Dean and Cas have some sort of emotional climax here they need to reach and this is very much now something where I feel like I can actually feel disappointed if this does not pay off.

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Oh yeah switch straight to breaking and entering. You know your track record with prophets.

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Yup that's a straight up crazy wall from the trope book. You sure like this one, you had Gabriel do it last year and it's like hey, that looked super cool.

Aaaand we're treading on Edlund again with the Egyptian plagues.

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Can I just say that Buckleming are almost solely responsible for reeling off lists of names of prophets and they are so wildly inconsistent with them. What was God's PLAN with these guys. I mean it's blatantly not being protected any more and perhaps angels would have done so in the past when they were around to do it, but it's like every single one of the dudes from 8x07 has to be dead even though Sam and Dean took a few of the surviving ones home, just for Donatello, and then we're up to this guy and like... when all the names of future prophets were carved into the minds of all angels did Metatron ever wonder like, wow, we have a pretty thin list of generations for a long while then 2010s, wow, that's like... 50 names all existing at once... what's going to happen to these guys to have such a demand. Real prophet mill. What the heck happens to Kevin Tran.

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(You do)

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Sphinx machine shop. Because Egypt, get it? Ha ha

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Yay, Winchesters save the day. Tony framed with halos as he throws the fire down... then sam gets to practice his choke hold he used on Garth.

(How IS Garth)

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I mean going in and roughing up the guy and telling him god isn't talking to him and that he's "just a psycho" seems like a really wrong approach when he's legit channelling enochian knowledge and Cas has confirmed that he IS the next in line prophet, while Donatello is in a weird state of limbo, which means that there could very well be something very odd happening to this man, and he just starting going out and killing because of it... Like... at least ask him some questions before you get into the punching.

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Oh, then Sam is like, hang on, and repeats my watching notes to Dean.

They never talked about the possibilities in the car on the way over to the punching? That pre-prophets are, you know... still special in some way and liable to randomly activate?

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Aaaand then he uses Dean's gun to kill himself, after being fucked around with by the cosmic powers and also the Winchesters, mainly Dean who is a very irresponsible cosmic power right now.

I'm just saying, this is kinda, like, your problem not his. Great work, guys.

(This is Buckleming idiot ball bouncing all over the place, very season 8 vibes)

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The ominousness of a guy using Dean's gun to kill himself while Dean is out on a suicide errand run is pretty dang symbolic though.

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Also they had BETTER realise this is problem NOT solved and ask Cas who the NEXT prophet is and put tabs on them.

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Oh good, Sam's talking to Cas and they are sensible and work this out between them.

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Don't ask Dean, he's a sulking cosmic dumbass.

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By the way there's dropping the idiot ball where maybe it didn't even occur to the writer how to do something better, and there's intentionally writing your characters mean and stupid to move the plot along a lil, and then there's doing that and showing full awareness that you know the things they would have had to think to avoid them being mean and stupid and just having that be the open of the next scene, meaning you're hanging a lampshade on the idiot ball, which is TERRIBLE home decorating advice for your character feng shui.

It's now very knowingly making your character dispassionately attack a man into suicide when they had a better take on the subject all lined up and ready to go, but if it occurred to them that he might have a supernatural affliction before he shot himself then it wouldn't have tidied itself up like that, because Sam 100% would have been all out trying to save the guy and Dean would have listened to reason on that.

This sequence is like a masterclass in Buckleming carelessness that makes the guys look mean and stupid for no reason other than moving the plot along at a brisk clip.

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I'm counting this bad sequence of events as a contrived plot twist mostly out of spite for the character slander.

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Sam stuck in the middle of an argument between Dean n Cas about Donatello's fate while they're both sending angry dark silences at each other. Finally Dean says, "you know how" for his benefit since he was slow to open his book to the same page of the sulk those two are in.

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Nick's back at it.

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Is this his actual wife actress from 5x01 who unfortunately grew out her hair or a re-cast wife with very long hair unlike the original wife?

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Why am I not currently watching Michael wrestling a goblin shark instead of this

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Given time and place, the mirror icing up like that could just be the polar vortex, you know.

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This is a lot of anvils about revenge and stuff. Vengeful ghosts always being the best means to explore these things.

It would sure be handy if she just went for Nick and ripped out his heart and that was the end of that.

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Anyway I guess Sarah being horrified at Nick's decision making could be interesting for this narrative if anything about it was to be interesting, given we're 10 minutes from a John Winchester episode at this point, but the meta commentary on Nick has to be assumed to be pretty low key in condemning him if Eugenie is so up his butt and presumably also writing his scenes. Though honestly, she's ALSO the one who was going around talking about Donatello's actor as a dear family friend if I remember correctly, which means maybe she's been writing the other scenes as well and Brad's been dipping in and out of an episode double-barrelling her pet projects, after his genuinely commendable attempt to write his half of their last episode.

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Nick's awful clingy wife [/irony font] gives him an ultimatum - let me find peace or fuck off with Lucifer and leave me to eternal imprisonment in the veil. Is this a fractal branch of the crypt scene or am I just on too high alert.

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"I can't. I'm sorry."  
RIP HIS HEART OUT, BABE

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Aw.

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"Sometimes letting go is the right choice."  
"Tell me about it." *side-eyes Sam*

Getting right in there with the assisted suicide metaphors, huh?

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It's him! It's Dr Sexy!

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Or, Dr Novak. He really has to quit using that name for everything before the authorities catch up to him. Also because this is literally his name in 100,000s of Doctor Cas fan fics.

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Sam like oh it's Cas, Dean's like oH, iT's CaS. *tiny weeny suppressed "me likey" smile, a raised eyebrow but not in an ironic way*

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"The... other... Mr Winchester"  
"Doctor."  
"Doctor :)))))"

Filed right away in the NOW you can throw me into the Marianas Trench for eternity happy folder of his brain.

And, yup, canonical use of the Dr Sexy dialogue, meaning for sure this is a Dr Sexy reference in canon and that Dean is canonically getting a complete dorky boner for Cas right now this instant.

Sam just heads off, Dean and Cas play "who's going to stay behind and initiate a chat" chicken

Cas *grabs Dean by the correct shoulder, manhandles, trying to apologise*  
Dean *looks him up and down, not taking in a word*

"I know the feeling" *cute flirty smile, still completely not on the level with Cas thanks to this pleasant distraction*

-

"So then this is goodbye"  
*pregnant pause, Cas's lips part a lil*  
"Guys, check this out"

FOR CHRISSAKE SAM THEY WERE GOING TO KISS. THEY WERE GONNA AN DYOIU djshflsdkfj

-

Dean and Cas back out of their intense pose like someone's let go of an elastic band that was keeping them in vibrating tension from each other, and they visibly subside while Interrupting Moose expositions.

-

Cas gets way too invested in fixing Donatello - "if there's a spark, if there's a hope, I have to try" and he and Dean eyeball each other like it's season 4.

See, Dadstiel and Dean can still have simmering chemistry, they've just been chill and watching cowboy movies together instead of having blistering eyeball sex to resolve all their issues because the issues got toned down.

-

Also Dean's gonna love to see THAT high horse go when he finds out about Cas's Empty Deal.... not.

-

Give me the dumbass eyeball fucking we've been denied for years of Chill Destiel.

-

I mean seriously just the fact than an interrupting moose had to be employed here means that there is no goodbye that Dean and Cas can make on camera that gets past the point we got to without them spilling feelings and sloppy makeouts.

-

Cas is really getting into this reconstructing brains and stuff side of his powers in recent seasons. I don't think he's ever probed around in heads as much as he has in Dabb era.

-

Sam angsting about what Donatello is going through, being trapped in his own body, while Dean is like "then don't think about it" because obviously this is the issue with Sam not being able to leave Dean in peace at the bottom of the ocean, knowing he's going to be down there searching for wifi and not finding it.

(now if SAM was punted into the marianas trench..)

Having worked himself up about it on Dean's behalf, Donatello is excruciating for him to contemplate because it's just a reminder of what Dean will go through too.

-

Sam snaps, easy for you to say, re: not thinking, and Dean's like actually it's not anyway let's change the subject, I can't admit to having a functioning brain because that's uncool and therefore unmanly.

-

Ahaha "he doesn't have his soul" "nobody's perfect" Dean quoting Some Like It Hot is good.

Considering that's the final parting line about how one of the main characters reveals he's not a woman and his new sugar daddy is totally cool with it :P Classic queer moments of cinema.

-

Also praise be, a Dean n Cas whispering to each other scene. Om nom nom, contextless gifsets abound.

-

"Cas will catch you up"

Cas wants to be mad but he smiles because dammit, that's MY dumbass who's shading me for my decisions and forcing me to take responsibility for my actions in a passive aggressive bitchy way... I love him so much.

-

Notice when Dean walks into frame legs only when SAM is the one leaning in the background against something, he does not in fact appear directly between legs like when Cas did in 4x02.

-

I love when Sam says something dorky as a one liner then smiles to himself. "No rest for the self destructive :3"

He thinks he's adorable and that's what matters.

-

Where's Cas tho

-

Did Sam just shade Dean with an emphasis on "OUT"

You can not talk, you interrupting moosed a Destiel kiss

Buddy, you do not get off the hook for that, EVER.

-

We're like 2 minutes from the 300th episode and they're fighting. Sam is drawing the wibbly line around "saving the world" and "saving Dean" so that he can have his cake and eat it, or that the world is meaningless without Dean, while Dean is rightfully doing what Billie says, in the circumstances of what HE knows, and rather than try and find another way, this seems preeeeetty certain that he ought to just do what she says rather than try and fight Michael the hard way. For Sam, it's giving up and betraying the principles of saving each other rather than their legacy of saving the world.

-

You ever wonder what would happen if Death went to Sam first for a chit chat to explain matters instead of leaving Dean to badly and angrily explain things after running away and keeping secrets?

-

I think Sam's pretty upset about all the suicide and assisted suicide metaphors going on this episode... He goes to the fact that Donatello fought through, and that they were able to save him, insisting that as long as they keep buying time, more cards might turn up. This is, honestly, the way the show works in the sense that there's no way they're actually gonna punt Dean into the Marianas Trench, and Mel messaged me this morning to say that season 15 was confirmed so it's gonna be pretty boring if they do. And fate keeps on changing, and they do find different ways. There was a moment in season 5 where Michael won and for sure all the books looked the same, but at one point back in season 1, Dean pretty much was written off by the random electric shock until they had an intervention from a reaper, or season 2 when Dean was nearly written off until John's deal. So Sam is technically right that he can just sit on his ass (and sit his ass on Dean to stop him leaping into the ocean) and if they keep poking, SOMETHING is gonna happen to shake everything up, and the fates will have to adjust, and they keep doing their best to get to a new and better destination.

And this has to be in absolute faith that Dean is strong enough to hold back Michael all this time, and prove his own self-worth wrong on the matter because Billie is basically saying, the universe says you're not strong enough to hold Michael back.

Buuuut in context, I mean, Sam's trying to grab the narrative and wrangle it in their favour and be meta and optimistic about their lives, and Dean is being realistic based on circumstances and what they've been told in a way appropriate for a character faced with these choices. It still makes Sam look like he's being extremely reckless with the world just on the fact that he can't know what we know that they truly are just characters in a TV show with a confirmed 15th season. It unfortunately does make his fuck fate optimism fly in the face of common sense. Against such huge forces, the Marianas Trench option doesn't feel like the "easy" way out, so much as the safest, and is a fuck fate that means veering around destruction in a very different way than the finding a different way of the apocalypse, where it was heroic to resist fate that said they'd get the world burnt.

-

I also feel like we've probably seen the last of Cas this episode. Boo.

-

Wow, I think that's the first time Sam's ever thrown a punch at Dean first out of sheer annoyance unlike Dean who did it multiple times in the earlier seasons through to season 8 at latest I think.

-

Did he punch first in 10x23? I honestly don't remember because that whole sequence was awful and I've barely engaged with it since.

-

I also don't think he's initiated a hug before?

-

Anyway Sam makes it personal and Dean lets Sam talk him out of it for now...

-

"Maybe Billie's wrong. Maybe." *pause to think about Death being terrifying* "But I'm keeping the box"

Oh, "but I do believe in us" yeah yeah whatever

*Cas walks over sans coat but still badass*

"I believe in all of us"

-

"Until there's absolutely no other way" Listen, we'll just... keep the box hitched to the car... it's just a metaphor or something I gotta haul around with me

you've gotten so Goth lately, Dean

-

Okay now he's giving Sam time to think about having to let Dean go (and Sam is killing it with the tears and the sexy grimacing) which is healthy and good and like, Sam NEEDS to be able to grow and change and be able to let Dean go and not take it personally when he has to do the Swan Dive for the universe's sake.

This is actually really important because a LOT of dramatic moments about the codependency have circled around Sam not being able to let go of Dean, but he's never really grown and changed, he usually wins or gets vindicated instead of making an effort to let it go. Honestly, Amelia was the one time it remotely worked, and ever since Dean crashed that, Sam's been regressed back to 1x12 and not managed to get back off those rails. Giving Sam an opportunity to do his own coming to terms with Dean's potential imminent death might actually let him healthily sort through some stuff and accept that Dean might have to die and even if Dean doesn't and they do win and season 15 - oh, is already confirmed - then they'll have an overall healthier dynamic and be able to take further steps towards a balanced endgame.

-

"Alright," Sam says. Cas does not.


	13. 14x13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ow.

14x13 watching notes

Mutual moment with everyone involved for the sheer horror of 300 of these which is scarier than anything else the show has ever done.

-

Dad's on a hunting trip??? What is this, season 1??????? (Also: both nostalgic AND fitting for the episode's subject matter :'))

-

Er did the recap specifically telling us "once you go Casper things can go a little - a lot - crazy" have anything to do with the episode or were we just getting quips? John didn't SEEM like a ghost :P

-

Oh it's the sort of episode where we recap the Tragic Winchester Story of John throwing away Sam and Dean's food in a fit of anger and grief, rather than, like, ghost-hunting antics.

-

They really turned the music down and poured us into the episode all slow and quiet, and there's no music playing and that makes me feel irrationally scared.

Looks like just 3 epiosdes later the demon monkey is showing up in a pawn shop so I'm starting to fear that's Gabriel's new vessel. He's got his claws in this season. You don't just get Doctor Sexy roleplay without Gabriel guiding things from behind the typewriter, but in a bored, detached, this will be hilarious way, not a megalomaniacal Metatron way.

-

As a brit, I am horrified to even ask if "Cash any time for gold, silver, diamonds, guns, etc" is common policy.

-

Is this guy local (hence the focus on the town in the title) or are they just... where did they get the money for one thing... I have so many questions but maybe this is just what they do in their downtime, since 7x16 proved they really do need to keep an eye on what's in the back room of pawn shops and second hand stores and the like. And they've single-handedly kickstarted a full hunter economy in Lebanon.

-

Oh if this guy is legit then for sure that's the actual Roadhouse monkey, taken from the site and lovingly restored.

-

Sam, I will pay you literally double whatever that cash was to pull the teddy bear string

-

Oh, nope, he's just a guy Bela'ing his way through hunter stashes and probably would die if he knew what the Winchesters were sitting on.

-

THROW THE TEDDY BEAR AT HIM

-

"They always talk too much!" This is like multiple times in recent memory that Dean's managed to save Sam like that... 13x11 comes to mind.

-

"What do we do with this crap?"  
"take it home, right?"

WHY do you sound so unsure? You literally LIVE in the BUNKER full of ALL THE MAGIC OBJECTS

Dean looks suitably chastised for forgetting that

-

The next shot isn't even them with a U Haul

Maybe there wasn't so much big stuff they couldn't just pile it in the back of the car.

-

NYOOM (home edition) I have to say this season has been giving me some good Nyooms for the season review Nyoom Gifset.

-

Oh god this cinema is showing the original Hellhazers AND All Saints Day. And Beetlejuice but that's a real property :P Of course this would be the type of local cinema in SPN!Lebanon.

-

Oh come on that kid isn't even specific about WHICH time the guys rolled through town with someone in the trunk of the car. Was this when you were younger and Crowley was in there? Or was this a couple of weeks ago and Garth was in there? Or some OTHER time recently like idk they've driven around with Ketch in there? Or some monster who didn't even make the main story? You have to be clear, kiddo.

No wonder your friends look both skeptical yet not sure they want to disbelieve it.

-

And THEY know the sound of the engine, unlike all the dumb villains who forget to fear it :')

They maybe don't hear Dean say everything's lethal? I feel like maybe they're about to steal everything from the back of the car :P

-

Omg they use their mom's maiden name around town, that's ADORABLE (also not secure if they use it as a banking password though I kinda doubt they do :P). Also, er, I really hope we get to see what Mary is to them publically. Sister?????? She can roll up as Mary Campbell and THAT'S not ironic to be made to think about this episode of all of them.

There's also, and I'm sure it was a zillion miles from their thoughts, the whole Campbell Brothers who used the name as a cover to their secret homosexual lifestyles or whatever that museum guide said in The Mentalists... Just getting in before wank about that :P

-

Oh good, the local bar stocks the Family Business beer company, the name of which is getting ever more mileage this season and Wanek can't stop thanking Jensen and Danneel for.

-

Sam talking about taking Dean's mind off things, when the whole problem is his mind is literally on things.

All this time and Sam still doesn't appreciate how much Dean hates being handled with kid gloves.

-

In how many of 300 episodes has Sam wandered around reading lore to Dean about/from some thing they just discovered

-

THE KID WITH THE DUMB BAMBI LOOK ON HIS FACE? YOU TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW. Shit talk the others all you like and I'll join in, but Jack is not fair game.

Also he's physically older than them and YET they still accurately assume he's a "kid" and see him as much younger even from afar.

That bambi look really conveys well when they run into him at the grocery store beaming at a new cereal brand or whatever.

-

Asking where Jack even came from really is a good question, though. Like, the way people have been moving into the local area, especially since the AU peeps, is weird enough that so many people would descend on their nowhere town, but if you're specifically watching the Winchesters, they just randomly get an intern who looks like bambi and they treat like a 4 year old one day out of the blue.

-

noooo now I'm dunking on Jack for looking like Bambi. It's a slippery slope and they pushed me onto it D:

-

"Doesn't mean that they kidnapped bigfoot or whatever"

You know what, she's technically right so she gets a cookie.

-

Awww adorable gay crush between these girls. You better survive. (I'm assuming as it's the new and somewhat unholy GlynnDabb combo, they will)

-

"Whatever their deal is, they got an awesome car" Baby gets ALL the chicks feeling her up

-

Sweetie, if you are thinking of stealing her to impress your crush, you are going to be in so much trouble (but also Dean legally can not press charges until he confesses to his crush so you're fine.)

I hope this proves less dangerous than going into the Hell House in 1x17 and also argh I know this is the whole point of reflecting on reaching 300 episodes but these guys have only been terrorising Lebanon since mid-season 8 and they've already reached that status here with the local kids.

Some people join local community events and run for local positions, some people stop to get the mail before removing the angry monster from the trunk of the car, either way you become important to the town's emotional economy.

-

Sooooo many things in this ledger, but let's just highlight Bee's Knees.

-

You know, this happened before in 11x04 but you were too busy eating steak or whatever it was to even notice the last time a teen girl used your car to impress a crush. You really ought to stop leaving the keys in her though, because she's becoming a lesbian icon.

-

"That car is dangerous," Sam says, focussing on what's inside her  
"If anything happens to that car," Dean threatens, way more worried about Baby than even the fact she contains a potential michael-be-gone pill never mind the threat to the baby gay who stole her  
"I don't want to die" whimpers the kid who suddenly realises how TALL these men are up close

-

Sam goes rushing into the post office and comes off like a creeper, Dean wanders in full charm offensive having chatted up the blushy mail clerk and knows about her grandson. :')

You flirt that info out of her, you old charmer you

-

Sam: "I have no idea what level of eyebrows are appropriate for this situation so I will try them all at once."

-

Wowww it's February 7th already. Leap RIGHT over that birthday. Straight into airdate.

Small towns have no secrets, and Sam and Dean have survived SO WELL into their 6th year in the neighbourhood, but NO MORE.

-

This abandoned house looks the most like the photos actual visiting fans have shared of Lebanon than anything they've shown us of the town to date.

-

Aaaaah those girls can't pull that teddy bear string D:

-

WHY IS ITS MOUTH SEWN SHUT

-

I mean, phew, they didn't pull it and find out, but aaaaaaaaaah

This is one of those things where your imagination is probably waaaaay worse.

-

Great, whispery noises mean SOMETHING cursed is about to get out D:

-

Ew, it's a cigar box with a smoke hand. Looks cool, probably smells foul and gives you lung cancer as the curse.

-

That's a HORRIFYING arm.

-

We're like 300 episodes overdue someone blowing a vapor ring when surrounded by Ghost Chill.

-

Well if that kid wasn't murdered he's gonna have Sam's clown trauma forever.

-

Except if this clown ghost came out of a cigar box it's also a STINKY clown.

-

Sam n Dean driving Mary's black truck she acquired just in time for this episode

-

Aaand Dean still is more distracted by his beautiful car than the potential danger people are in from the stuff they had in the back... I'm not sure what damage kids could have done to it that he couldn't fix, but there's definitely a safety blanket aspect of the car which has been shown several times lately to turn Dean completely irrational, to the point that I'd almost put it on the "worrisome" column of his behaviour where it hadn't actually been in the earlier seasons, no matter how much he cared about her. Like, I don't THINK he'd value the car over another human life if push came to shove but then he hasn't actually been tested on that lately and the show is getting on and picked up a 15th season so if Dean needs to learn to put this safety blanket down and recover from the recent traumas that made him feel this way then... who knows :P

-

Oh wow, Ethan survived the clown attack, nice work, show.

-

FBI is overkill for a kids' houseparty

-

Oh Sam. Sam Sam Sam. John Wayne Gacy? You poor baby. Just go sit outside while Dean handles this, okay sweetheart?

Sam has clearly already read that detail in the log book, identified the box in their new possessions and mentally underlined it for like the most extreme handling care and throwing it in the depths of the ocean in a Mal'ak box they have at their disposal. He identifies it without hesitation. From far across the room. That is the look of a man with all the worst case scenarios mapped out.

-

"This is the bestworst thing that's ever happened to you." I love how wildly unhelpful Dean is being while Sam is running around banishing The Killer Clown.

*Dean scratches his nose*

-

I mean he's currently possessed by Michael, what the fuck is John Wayne Gacy going to do to him?

... Gently bat him onto the sofa while Sam sets the fire going, apparently badly cut for time or on my ripped copy or something. BRB asking Mittens if that was too abrupt for her too.

-

Whoops now the kids know.

Or, well, the beanie hat kid knew all along, he just didn't know WHAT he knew. Max is new to the neighbourhood and having reasonable emotions, not sure about the other girl or what her name is.

-

how is it any less irresponsible to have all the cursed shit out in open boxes on your table in your secrit bunker

-

Dean deciding to do this weird pearl dealio in private because "why get their hopes up" is the reasoning for Cas and or Mary not being involved in a whole bunch of events, and this time the actors are in the episode so it really is just a bit of character elaboration to back up how Dean especially has a serious streak of wanting to do things like this, and not to drag down/ruin the day of his loved ones, and burden them with bad news or failed hopes.

-

I'm assuming it's one of those things where the pearl doesn't respond to commands but it's interesting that Dean doesn't even ask out loud, or, well, he says it BEFORE he picks up the pearl, but then he just closes his eyes and concentrates, which means that the actual wish is internal. We have to assume he's wishing for what he said before but of course we can't know for sure - and the pearl presumably instead of listening to surface level thoughts, reads something deep inside Dean instead and reads his deep desires instead (well, pretty much as described on the label tbh...) this is something fundamental to Dean as a whole, rather than his immediate concern. Thematically, John trauma is linked back to Michael anyways - as most things that happen to Dean are. A root thing to address before he can remove the influence of Michael is his lingering issues with John, we might say to give the pearl its due for answering his surface wish.

-

Christ he's been alive for 0.2 seconds and he's beating the shit out of Sam

-

"Don't you move," he grits out to Dean, who indeed has been standing still in terms of development past the point of John's upbringing in many ways :P

-

I love that John can take out the boys still without straining himself, but also that the Bunker was sent into temporary lockdown because Big Magic Shit happened and that gave John a demon!Dean style go of the black n red lighting in there. Ya know, just a thematic lighting reminder of the worst effect of his parenting before we even TRULY clap eyes on him.

All softened up in audience's hearts by his association with Negan :'D

And how he appears as a dark intruder, rather than sort of, like, angelically descending into their living room.

-

Honestly the bestworst thing of The Killer Clown manifesting for Sam is not entirely a wrong parallel here, that we can compare entrances instantly for. The complicatedness of what John means to the boys, between family love, strong respect, and hero worship and then the trauma and arguing etc and general dreadful way they were raised... While Dean has a different more repressed approach to his John trauma, Sam was a rebellious child up to the point of storming out to reject the life and go to college, and he and John burned hot with big flare ups. The overt contradiction of love/hate that Sam struggled with in season 1 and his recent history with John from the time of leaving for college, all really do get encapsulated in the kind of concept of what a serial killer clown would mean for Sam: something he both is entranced and repelled by on instinctive interest/horror levels. It's a really astute thing to throw in there. Especially as so much of the focus is on Dean, all the time, when it comes to John, but we should never forget how complicated Sam's issues were with him even if he doesn't allow that trauma to rule him in the same ways that Dean, who turned himself into a John mini me and loyally obeyed to the point of WISHING he had independent thought like Sam in 1x11, just always seems overtly to be struggling against John's ongoing influence as if John is STILL handing down orders.

(If Cas is reset to hanging with Zach like ye olde days, THAT will be the equivalent of the killer clown parallel for Dean as to Sam.)

-

Wow, they grabbed his consciousness from the last time it was remotely safe to pick it up, 2 years before canon starts. Again, killer clown, this puts the ball way more in Sam's court for John stuff in the sense of immediate like... stuff... due to the whole current exile thing (omg also how can John possibly look at grown up Sam and think it's his lil babby Sammy who ran off to college. That's not what freshman 15 does. That's freshman 15 years. "What happened to you?" doesn't cover it... He's like... how do you even recognise him :P). It removes the burden of canon - e.g. Azazel plan stuff - and puts them back to the most default they ever got without mytharc interference. Mid argument about going to college, sure, but that bad blood doesn't really matter now Sammy is all growed up and runs a small hunter army from a bunker full of magical weapons and artefacts and is in fact more than half the length of the show over his Lucifer issues.

I mean, like... We can kinda feel like there's one way or the other Dean reacts to John, but Sam has done all this work on himself over time and John is set back to even before they made up in canon in 1x20 when they really hashed it out at all... It's fascinating to know what they build this time - like in 5x13 where Sam has some catharsis talking with an even FURTHER back in time John who has only just learned the supernatural EXISTS and gets some sense of the man he used to be and can talk to him about all this minus the trauma and baggage of their upbringing and arguments, when John is a fresh slate that Sam can get answers out of... This John has that baggage but he doesn't have the mytharc baggage so it's a sort of halfway compromise between 5x13 John and 1x20 John, but with a Sam who is not only miles beyond season 1 as season 5 Sam was, but has literally gone so far past that, very few traits of the early seasons Sam even still reside in him and he's become this big lumbering zen dad nerd/hunter boss.

-

John is at a disadvantage to his boys and that's ALSO fascinating. The only time they ever had him like that was briefly in 1x22 but then it turned out he was possessed by Azazel and just pretending to be proud of them for risking their butts to save him and pulling it off. It doesn't count. I mean I had to stretch to even think of that much. This is completely new territory where they get to pour him a steadying drink or 3 and fill him in on all he missed, and he has to go with what THEY say, rather than in season 1 when Sam was so furious about always doing what John said without question and having to go on his word.

-

D'aaw, that's a good point, Henry finally at rest now that John's at least set foot once in the Bunker and appreciated that he's a MoL legacy as well. It's just sort of... tidying things up.

DabbGlynn wandering through here with a broom and one of those feather dusters on the big stick.

-

Aaaand we get to the promo scene. John impressed with them! Saving the world multiple times and he finally seems genuinely proud and "You've been busy" covers more than actually saying the words, in the Winchester way... It's not exactly subtle this time that it's sarcastic understatement and he's really only putting a different set of words on top of what he means but perhaps it's necessary to illustrate that this is how they talk about things rather than have him say it outright? Especially when it makes people think he's possessed if he would :P

And like Mary like 2 episodes ago he says he wishes he'd been there for more of their lives and seen it himself... We're getting an unfortunate maybe not intentional implication as Mary talks about their home lives and missing out on raising them and John talks about missing out on all the world-saving. Woman's place is in the home, man's place is saving the universe.

But he "was" there for them as kids even only on the technicality that he didn't, like, legally give them up for adoption, and so he may consider that he did the raising part though his input was mostly military, and leaving Dean to do the domestic side.

-

Can not believe it takes them to that point where John mentions going out on his revenge on what killed mom, for Sam and Dean to be like, ooooooooh wait damn there's something we ought to have started with huh?

-

Ya know I know Mary is surprised, but is she actually, like, SHOCKED specifically that her two dumb boys managed to end up with dad sitting at the table having a whiskey with them?

She, specifically, who has been resurrected on their behalf and has now lived through both Cas and Jack being killed and then coming back and I mean I don't even know what Winchester life and death yo-yoing I can even count aside from that when it comes to her boys and dying to include on the list. They've been legally dead a feeeeeeeew times in recent memory without it sticking for more than a minute or so. Like, not even worth telling her about a few of them.

-

Dean: *stares like a dumb gawker*   
Sam: Dude, time to GO

-

So Sam and Dean have that argument and Sam stomps off, and finds John leafing through the books in the library, which WAS a euphemism when Rowena and Gabriel defiled the bunker, but Mary isn't there so I guess she's maybe run off to shower or SOMETHING leaving him to poke around

They in no way gave him the full story about Henry since what we saw on screen was his introduction to the conversation, so John's been left with a loooot of questions about what exactly he's a legacy to and what the fuck his dad was up to instead of parenting him. Knowing how Sam and Dean tell stories and summarise things, I can't imagine they've painted a particularly eloquent picture of anything around him, even if I assume most of what they told him off camera, for "sheesh if you're here you watched 299 of these suckers already, no need for THAT recap" reasons, is at least a little more detailed than what we saw him being told.

-

John beams at Sam like "wow he grew up into a giant nerd and not the king of hell", completely unaware that Sam yelled at a bunch of demons and accidentally scared them so much that it's pretty clear who's the boss now

-

Oh my god, because Dean wanted Winchester Surprise, Mary's decided to make it AGAIN for them now John is here, and Sam can even have it inflicted on him (poor boy, who only eats salad these days) and that means that the memory they were discussing has accidentally been dragged to the forefront and - wait a minute back in the season 11-12 hiatus I had Mary make casserole for them and Dean was like oops this is gross why do I remember it as the most delicious food... someone's been reading my fic for ideas - that means that Sam reminisces about the same thing Dean did, with his paired parent (it's always been Sam and John, Dean and Mary, when it comes to emotional drama stakes. With Dean and John it's more of the internalised version of him that comes out as demon!Dean in 3x10/actual demon!Dean, I think?) And that means that we get John and Sam suddenly caught in the conflict. Or at least, what had been a conflict then... If I can overcome the angst and press play, I'm mightily curious about how they handle it NOW, when John is in culture shock and happy ending shock, and seeing how Sam has survived, didn't turn evil, and defeated all his demons caused by the main mytharc. If missing Mary was what made him angry in the first place in this argument, how can he be now? This pairs him with Nick, who turned away from resolution with his family.

-

"I screwed up with you a lot, didn't I?"

John unintentionally slam-dunks Nick, and in a line, since the table was metaphorically set for this already with 14x11 and the set up about how Sam, Dean and Mary were affected by this story, in the past and/or present, John essentially concludes the story by - and again, important that this is post-fight, pre-canon but actual his soul his self John - apologising for the screwing up and understanding at least as this version of himself. Even if they know their memories of John from then onwards didn't act different - I mean Sam's argument from the start right through to his final yelling at him in 2x01 was that John was doing the shit that made Sam so angry he left in the first place - it's now as grown men and Sam especially having been so smol and only just legally an adult and with no real place in the world compared to the man he's made himself on screen in front of our eyes from scratch (ugh I'm so proud of him... what's that I have an entire moose in my eye) that they are gifted a chance like this. Sam getting a real and meaningful confrontation with a John who KNOWS and UNDERSTANDS what he did...

And in a way what Dean has carried away is so much more than John himself but the tenfold psychological manifestation of him, the product of the abusively harsh upbringing... he's made a larger, darker shadow of the man who lurks over him like a shell... Sam though, might also be a product of a similar upbringing, but again, Dean internalises, Sam externalises... Since he locks that trauma up in the safest box in the show, and otherwise puts on airs of being emotionally healthy, what's been important to him is face to face with John. In 2x02 he's especially crushed because he'd last talked to John to scream in his face and he was breaking under the pressure of now trying to be what John wanted and be a hunter and abandon any thought of not being in the life, and it was all guilt about how he fucked up the last encounter, like he could have KNOWN. In 2x22 he stands a lot to the side of their last glimpse of John, who pays Dean more attention for having shot Azazel... He gives Sam a smile but it's so much more an acknowledgement of getting revenge and then his peace. Which Dean facilitated, and meanwhile Sam's in open existential crisis re: Azazel and magic powers and resurrection and - well, you know, demons and stuff.

And then as much as he makes asides about it all he really just does not make things about John or have John-related plot nonsense descend on him like it does on Dean, so the face to face in 5x13 is really the most he ever gets real emotional progress for his own healing.

Anyway Dean summoned a John for you into your own home so you can chat to him and sort some shit out.

-

Cue a 3 day break where I typed so enthusiastically I triggered a huge fibro flare up in my fingers and hands so bad I could barely use them... I'm calling this John's fault and also pecking a lil more carefully at the keys now D:

-

UGH but John knowing exactly what his behaviour was re: winchester surprise that means he's got it right there in his mind to leap to screwing up and then also between this culture shock of Everything Is (mostly) Okay Now, and grown!Sammy and probably a lot that he thought about after Sam left (and all the things Sam said there) that he never said when they met back up again... This bizarre circumstance all is set up to make Sam cry and try and tell John it's okay, and John to KNOW it's not and that this is something they ought to talk about. That if their lives really are to continue forward from this point (and seeing as Mary is here and has been living a forwards moving life since 11x23 there's no reason for him to immediately doubt this weird hallucination if he accepts it as reality...) then he HAS to make it right with his boys, now that they're undeniably grown adults, Dean is a middle aged man and Sammy is getting there... The show is using their old man getting up to pee in the night schedule for broments... If they're to live their lives, they need to have reckonings about their childhood and what he inflicted on them.

-

"That fight was a lifetime ago" I mean despite the daddy issues being at the core of much of their trauma, that is a good point that Sam especially has been through a LOT of external issues which have messed him up far more. Unlike Michael to Dean, Lucifer to Sam has been far more external and while he messed him the heck up it was always more like Lucifer did that to Sam (and then compared them to his issues with God), while for Dean it was John messed him up completely (and then used the fact Dean was messed up as a way to manipulate him to do what God wanted)

In any case while so far a LOT of this has been on the John and Sam stuff and rightly so because Sam should not be overlooked and this scene is so wonderful it literally broke me just in the opening exchanges, there's a reason we all kinda flock to talking about Dean and John and by and large that was because Dean acted as Sam's parent and that not only sheilded Sam from John but also is yet one more burden to blame John for when it comes to Dean's issues so literally completely doubles back on itself there. Of course that in itself is part of the messed up way Sam was raised and then you can flip it back to Sam by saying well yep he has a parent but it was the wrong one and John shouldn't have been an absence like that and oh my god in no way is 3x08 supposed to be a celebration of Dean stepping up to Sam's parent role aged like 10 and making up for John and Sam giving him the amulet as a, here, you're my mom/dad now! :) Dean just prevented Sam from a completely catastrophic crushing but in their situation he could not have been enough and that's made clear a lot.

But Sam is a master of like, not letting himself feel/be upset by things long ago or out of control because he's scared of his own anger and he did find his zen and I mean I love that Sam's this big chill guy, but it's just as much an iceberg of angst as Dean's, and Dean's openly melts all over the place at the drop of a hat and Sam's does not.

-

Jared is literally killing me. Just FYI it is now Wednesday and I'm tentatively using my fingers again... D:

-

Yes watching this show is now more about writing than actually watching for me, yes you can watch that evolution accidentally take hold over the course of the literally millions of words of watching notes I've made >.>

-

Sam doesn't think about the fights with John when he thinks about him - compare to 2x02 when he's completely wrecked about how he went out arguing and it shapes the entire course of his very angry season 2 and onwards arc honestly that goes to Swan Song + recovery time

-

Like I'm saying late season 7 is maybe the first time this ever makes sense for Sam as character analysis just because he wasn't allowed to catch a break in the interim.

-

yes late season 7 is catching a break in Sam's world.

-

"I think about you on the floor of that hospital, and how I dropped my coffee cup so perfectly it stayed upright when it landed, which is honestly a miracle of physics"

-

I can't believe I'm actively rooting for John to hug Sam but I guess Sam's trauma may be deep but despite me literally wounding myself over it, is easier to put into clear terms than Dean's is, at least on a fundamental level of character-altering trauma, and, you know, the scale between the brothers which goes to actual physical obliteration of self that Dean's suffered that currently is represented by having the Michaels.

-

"That's enough" - Sam saying HIS version of this which can go to a resolution for him. I have been meaning to compare this to 5x13 but I suppose taking a week to watch this means that someone will have already done it but I am curious to compare the ways in which Sam has expressed things in a way that make him feel better about John.

-

No hug. You bastard. That is your only moose and he's crying.

-

Sam has one self-affirming conversation with John, and completely switches gears to this being the Best Thing Ever

-

Oh no there's a castle storage in the background!

-

Oh nooo they've been erased from the knowledge of the townsfolk. Dean feels personally offended that his booze supplier doesn't recognise him, and Sam gets snubbed by Max, who very obviously ought to know who he is after the morning she had pre-John.

-

But the lady in the post office snubbing Sam is completely understandable given how that exchange went earlier

-

Can not believe they're still using Dean's blue steel mugshot. C'mon, he hasn't been arrested since? :P Whip up some new AU mugshots for us with present day Jensen pulling the exact same face.

-

I hate AU!Sam an inordinate amount just based on that one picture.

It takes Sam seeing the mugshot to be sure something's up but Dean already just knew from one interaction

-

Lawboy wears a turtleneck sweater and somehow I don't think I'll find the Sam stans have taken to him like normal zomg Jared in glasses concepts :P

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Eeew Lawboy doesn't think you should have hobbies or a family.

On that note what is Sam's hobby - our Sam - aside from research and serial killers and history podcasts because honestly show, you do not give us enough Sam nonsense ever and it's the real crime here.

-

Lawboy and Blue Steel appear to be from the surface glance, very season 1 suggestions of where Sam and Dean could have gone without each other - and honestly Sam getting out of hunting and becoming lawboy seems more likely if John had NEVER died and they'd kept feuding but ALSO somehow Azazel hadn't happened so Sam really did go to that law school interview but never got Lucifer'd. I'm not sure if this isn't the universe's first attempt to deal with John being here but also the world didn't end and Sam and Dean are still alive too, now without the full ripple effect - I mean depending on how far away Cas's introduction is, maybe Jack still exists and they're still secretly eating candy away from Sam's gaze somewhere on their "hunt" and it's going to be a few more hours before they Back To The Future their son away... Idk I feel like this is something that's going to get worse :P And not just in a "well now they're in this universe, I don't like this universe Sammy" way but that the changes are going to keep on coming and the sweater will unravel into madness faster and faster and what happened to Sam and Dean might change as well.

Anyway it's interesting that John when they left him definitely had the personality of the assumed John pulled from his point pre-canon and seems to be in the epicentre that even if this is the worst universe ever where Lawboy becomes Sam's endgame personality, that surely John would hate this, of course we left them on the gutting scene that took me a week to pass.

Very curious about the metaphysics of this and also I hold stories like this to an exacting standard out of professional pride so they better do this right, however the sweater crumbles.

-

"No I googled me as well. LOT of headings."

-

"No I don't think so, I think it's a temporal paradox" these were invented by SF writers to allow them to explore these bubbles of Time Weird. I guess that's the tl;dr of what I was rambling about, essentially what whatever the world out there is like NOW, Sam, Dean, Mary and John are at the epicentre... At least for now.

-

"I'm cool but you're... euccch" I agree, but you can't judge timelines based on the fact that you're inherently cool and Sam's a nerd.

-

ZACH!!! Back to be stabbed in the face again I hope :)

If you aren't I am going to be very displeased but that doesn't stop me being DELIGHTED to have you back just to hate some more. The only thing that could make me happier is you and Metatron on a coffee date.

Season 4 Cas, henceforth batchelor!Castiel to our current party!Cas, less so happy to see.

Still got the walk though.

-

"Earth, you're always stepping in something" there were a bunch of hamburger wrappers there, and given both characters history with hamburgers, i.e. "these make me very happy" and using them to manipulate Dean in the Beautiful Room, extra symbolic of stepping all over humanity. "Humanity"

-

How dare you call Castiel "Constantine" after literally over 10 years of us not talking about the elephant in the room.

How daaaare you show bachelor!Castiel is different by having him not understand the reference, implying our Cas would D:

-

God, sorry, I'm still harping on this. Does Sam need glasses but only Lawboy has got his eyes tested? Or is Lawboy just wearing them to look more nerdy?

-

Also waaaaaaah Zach making Castiel stand to the side while he does all the talking, just like Ye Olde Days before Cas rebelled.

-

He's not even thinking, "I could banish your ass and go watch TV," which would be Cas's no.1 intent for squinting at him were party!Cas here.

-

Nooooo bachelor!Castiel!! Don't murder them all! And omg how robotic his voice is as he says "my name is Castiel, I'm an angel of the lord" because this is the anvil reminder of what Cas used to be and how obedient he was... In this AU heaven is in full working order, and that's wholly because their spanner in the works still is brainwashed up to full working order and ready to threaten to murder a room full of teenage humans for information.

-

There's a sign behind bachelor!Castiel which says "PASTA bacon cheese" aka human things om nom nom bacon of the lord. God loves bacon, not that they know because he probably rolled his eyes and gave up on this AU too as soon as he saw Lawboy in action.

-

Oh lol and there's a Roman centurion bust behind Castiel just in case you weren't getting the message that he's a good soldier - and commander of armies, though still Zach's bitch.

-

"Cas?" Dean asks, and gets the Ole Puzzled Squint. No one's called this asshole "Cas" in eternity.

-

Dean once again goes and does that thing where he ignores all the evidence to make the heartfelt appeal - "Cas, you KNOW US" ... bachelor!Castiel squints harder. "I don't know you" and Dean looks completely affronted like sorry mate what did you expect based on literally everything lawboy and Zach just told you? And yet the heart wants what the heart wants and so Dean will always ask the dumb emotional questions of his loved ones that make no friggin sense when he has already been confronted with information that they're not currently themselves.

-

Nooo don't fight!

-

Dad fight in the parking lot, bring pizza

-

Oh yeah you're fighting full powered angels.

Which begs the question of why Zach is discovering his latent passion for choking Winchesters with magic but Castiel still wants to beat up Dean by hand.

-

Also why, I ask with fully raised eyebrow, is it always Cas n Dean paired off for shit.

-

SAM WHY DIDN'T YOU STAB HIM IN THE FACE YOU LOUSY SHORT-SIGHTED HIPSTER

-

I'm so upset

-

I say grinning in glee at Zach essploding on screen for the 3rd time

-

Christ, Castiel. Someone taught you to punch in this AU

-

"Cas... Cas... Stop it..." Dean begs, and doesn't get through, still, until Castiel slips between his FINGERS as Sam banishes him I'm so UPSET

Should have said "Our son will never forgive you if you kill us!"

-

Oh no the family table all laid out in the library because it's a fancier place to eat, and John and Dean are alone together.

I instintively flexed and clenched my fists in horror and the spectre of a week of ouchies twinged in my fingers. They're gonna kill me, aren't they?

-

Dean kindly sticks to explaining the time paradox and being sad about having to pick between parents, while wearing the bruises and cuts of bachelor!Cas's brainwashy beat up humanity treatment as a reminder of what ELSE is at stake here... That they're not just picking between parents, but between having Cas and Jack AND Mary, or Just John and going back to only the living people from the start of the series, but in a much more precarious position and who knows what sort of reset universe...

-

And John displays the ole Winchester way of it not "even being a choice" that he would die to keep Mary up and about.

-

Whoops I guess Dean and John don't talk about their shit STILL because we cut to Mary and Sam, and she's crying but just asks how to do it, rather than making a fuss. Both of them are pragmatic and awful about this, no clinging to each other, just grim acceptance that everything sucks and they never get nice things. Mary cries some more but doesn't argue that there might be another way... The wish was bad and must be un-wished, the djinn dream wasn't real blah blah it never gets set up in a way where you ever get to keep things, and just maaaaybe this is why you don't mess with a wishing pearl you found in a box of cursed objects?? Who knows what it would have done if it had found Michael to latch onto and mess around with.

-

oh here we go, we can talk about it when after leaving it aaaalmost aaaaaaaaaaaalmost to the last moment of being able to talk about it and with an interruption already pending to give them an out to run off to get dinner at any moment things get too emotional to handle, John calls Dean back to apologise, and Dean's like, so not ready for this conversation he bemusedly thinks that John's still talking about the sad state of affairs of having to be returned to the past where he can grow his hair back before he's allowed to return to canon.

-

Hey look Dean, John's proud of you and not possessed and also not doing anything actively awful to warrant an apology/admittance of being proud and oh my god why are there always terms and conditions because he is still only saying it knowing he has to return to the past, but still at least from the position of the relatively unburdened John who knows his fam gets a happy ending even if he has to have a stroke playing softball to allow them to have it...

-

"I hoped you'd get a normal life, a peaceful life. A family."

"I have a family," Dean says, ready to send John back to get his Cas n Jack back and protect Mom from fading out of reality.

And lets us gleefully interpret this as John wishing a settled romantic life for Dean where he gets a wife and kid and Dean's like, weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell

-

Time to get pie out of the oven rather than come out to Dad. But he said some important stuff for himself, to acknowledge that he doesn't have to be what John wanted, want what John wanted for himself, end up with what John thought a happy ending looked like for any of them, and to vocalise that what he has built for himself is good. While at the same time this normative image of mom and dad having dinner with the kids is completely off the table, because they're incompatible and only one of them truly represents the life that Dean wants and can live.

That JOHN, his values, what he would want for Dean, are incompatible with what Dean wants and has. John can't interpret the life Dean leads as the happy ending because it's not this heterosexual married couple and their bio kids and then those kids with wives and kids of their own kinda white picket fence thing. But even just ejecting John from the picture, and keeping Mary, she was raised as a hunter too and she fits into this world in a way he doesn't, because emotionally she has a different sort of adaptability than John. Rather than pass off this John as pulled from an AU where he's his present age, they set him up as the 2003 John because he's a relic, emotionally, and the out of time and place thing is a metaphor for his values.

-

And this family meal is AWKWARD, they're sitting in silence because it's a funeral for John and what could have been... A chance to say goodbye to him, but he's fully alive in his perspective, having a WEIRD ASS DAY and sitting through this emotionally gruelling meal... Yeah, let's have some casual conversation.

-

John belatedly turns it into a grimdark thanksgiving episode

-

Do you know why regular flavour party!Cas was not in this part of the episode?

He's binged The Walking Dead and all his suspicious side-eying of John would have got very tiring

-

Anyway John turning the conversation opener into GRACE, before DINNER, is just another reminder of what a weird wrong place he's in. Near as I can remember the only person to ever do that on the show was another abandoning father paralleled to John for his sacrificial choices - Jimmy. And the Novak household pre-Cas was very much that creepy normative IKEA furniture milk-drinking family.

Honestly, you could wonder if Cas did Claire a favour that she didn't grow up smol and queer and angry and ever have to find out what Jimmy and Amelia would have thought about her rather than only having life or death stakes unconditional love thrown her way and no terror of her parents >.>

-

Dinner montage! Montages are definitely increasing in frequency and we should probably be concerned.

-

And Sam n Dean have to do the dishes. Honestly, save it for after you kick John out to save time.

-

Oh, well. John and Mary may or may not be banging while Sam and Dean are doing this.

-

"So you're saying you wish things would be different?" Dean asks, when Sam laments, both of them covered in the bruises acting as the reminder of you know a pretty important stake in all this.

But now Sam is wishing that they could keep John because he got to have such a nice moment with him and, catharsis achieved, he's ready to keep this happy fun version of John around.

-

Dean instead gets so deep that Billie, who has also been watching events with mounting horror, suddenly realises that she, like every other poor cosmic sod who's had to deal with him, is now unfortunately in love with Dean Winchester for preaching the natural order and cosmic balance and not messing with things.

-

"Oh shit, old Death moved the moon for him... now I understand why... the bastard."

-

Dean also now gets to think of himself as old, and that he's grown into his trauma, sees Sam has too - even without this catharsis - and he's now able to repeat things in the spirit of 12x22 but from a place of peace and understanding about himself. Some of that philosophy behind Dean of the last couple of years... Honestly I'll never understand when I see people saying their characters don't change or grow because both of them are so different all the time every time and I'm more in love with the older wiser Dean than even dumb sparkly season 1 Dean, who is a very special, and very sparkly, Dean.

-

Literally trails glitter wherever he goes. Rewatching with HD is weird.

-

Come on Sam n Dean, you can do this. Sam's breaking but Dean's a master at this - he ONLY has red eyes and a rock solid face.

-

And John, who has not actually been around for a full season arc to evaluate the full damage he's caused and THANKFULLY talking to said older, wiser Sam n Dean so MAYBE this won't be as awful as the scared headless chicken versions of them, tells them to look after each other. The GOOD thing is that he's seeing them as adult men with an equal relationship to do that which honestly compared to the scars he left and his invisible looming presence helps a LOT but idk, in some ways I feel like seeing John again came almost too late, that really hashing it out would have had to be seasons ago, before the end of season 11, and Sam n Dean are just chill now. Chill and old and much more calm than they were. Way less likely to fall into terrible codependency habits, especially with a genuine wider family outside of each other also to look after and to look after them.

-

Haha, loser, John cried first, which makes it okay that Sam then cracks completely.

-

HUGS

and although maybe it's already started but permission for them all to say they love each other a lil more often?

-

Dean manages to say it about John and is that a single man tear or not? Close!

-

P L E A S E let Cas bust in here at the last moment, only to blink in confusion like why am I here, and then get a panicked phonecall from Jack like where did you GO and Cas is like I TELEPORTED? SOMEHOW?

-

Oh yep Dean is all covered in tears now, they're all sobbing.

Alternately Cas comes in and everyone's crying and he's like who is dead now

-

"OUR FATHER, YOU ASSHOLE"

"that was 12 years ago Sam"

-

*John is beamed up*

it's how he would have wanted to go

-

Mary: "so we're going to never tell AUBobby about this?"

-

AAW ALEX GOT HER HAND HELD

IT WAS ALL WORTH IT

-

"What happened"

"YOU, YOU ASSHOLE"

"Stop shouting, Sam"

-

I also love that because Jack wasn't in the episode, while we all got the first half of the season to appreciate how much the kid means to TFW, Cas walks in the door and just Cas alone and then Dean gets to beam warm loving energy at him in delight to see him all dad-shaped again, which really does fit with the otherwise romantic energies buzzing around and Cas specifically shows up for Dean as the very good reason to send John back and return his family to him :)

-

Hi John in the car with the old plates!

Awww he remembered it as a dream which honestly is the best thing you can do with weird time anomaly AUs. Cas let them keep 6x17 so I wonder a lil at the internal logic but honestly not so much that I don't begrudge John like 1 nice moment before he goes back to traumatising my boys in the past :P


	14. 14x14

14x14 watching notes

Technically a dog that catches its own tail and walks around all proudly with it in its mouth is an ouroboros. It doesn't hAVE to be portentious and doomy.

-

Oh dear, we're still on the box. Dean, no D:

Yesterday I watched 14x11 again with my friend who is direly behind and it's weird that despite a long gap and 2 episodes, we really have just been kind of stalling on this... They can't push it to the end of the season, can they? Also it's ridiculous to think Dean would actually end up going in the box after all this fuss.

Of course, that leaves us all majorly concerned about the Jack in the box pun.

-

Ooh new mexico. We don't get to see that very often on the show because of the climate :P It's not particularly rainforesty.

-

Oh well this was making me really hungry until the gizzards got involved.

This guy is a MUCH better chef than when they had mrs paddimore from downton abbey on the show

I'm assuming he binged Hannibal and was like, wait, wait wait wait. You can DO that.

Sweet.

-

Using eyeballs for foresight. Cool. *covers face in horror*

-

Dean is not allowed to make a comment about how the house smells like a good meal gone wrong... I assume they're going to know they were chasing the flesh eating guy based off his familiarity with them and be expecting it to be human bits burning on the frying pan...

Honestly, Sam would be glad of a case where the baddie is always one step ahead of them and they get to run around chasing him and roadtripping, roadrunner and coyote style (hence New Mexico - state birb :D) and keep Dean's mind off his mind and any sense of it being a one last case stretching out forever as they go... How hard would Sam really work to thwart him rather than being one step behind forever?

-

THE FAMILY

And.... is that baby's first plaid?

IT IS I'M SO PROUD OF HIM I COULD CRY

-

Cas is reading the last shreds of memory in a dead guy. Impressive.

-

RO RO IS ALREADY WITH THEM

-

I'd say a hunt with 5 people is excessive but honestly that's proven to be nearly enough to get the drop on a bad guy, historically, and this is part of the whole Dabb era new order where the family has expanded and they do a lot of hunting off-screen as well to save on the budget but can add in the idea that they do a lot of work together.

And again this case has been eluding them for a long time and even if it means extra Dean time before he punts himself into the ocean, they can't flail around forever just the two of them at it before others chip in to help.

If you hadn't felt it before, this is really a metaphor for the whole enchilada of the show and its dynamic.

-

Rowena bitching about her massage while looking at Sam.

... Look I ship them a lot but the difference here is between her insisting they owe her a massage and insisting Sam give it to her

-

Meanwhile, Rowena is still flirting with Cas. (to make sam jealous? or I mean. because it's Cas. She has the privilege to be in his space so she has to give it a go??)

-

I was talking about that with Mittens last night and we decided that ultimately Cas would be weird about going for it but even if he wasn't, she'd get bored of him very quickly.

Gabriel was a lil more her speed :P

-

"I'm not dying," Jack says then pulls a very useful reaction gif face

-

Rowena drifts over to stand by Cas, Cas drifts away to stand somewhere else, though he, Dean and Sam are all in different shots, it at least gave us a visual representation of exactly how me and Mittens thought that that relationship would go down :P

-

We also agreed that even if Jack doesn't call her "auntie rowena" like seemed to be implied then it's very much how their relationship has shaped up, and now she's calling him "dear boy" and falling in the trap that he's an earnest listener and that just MAKES you want to impart wisdom to him so his secret super power of being adopted by everyone is still going strong.

If he is sick again then that means he needs to do the spell again which means it's an active thing he has to repeatedly do rather than a passive effect, and it's also showing that it's only a few months later. We always knew it wasn't exactly sustainable but the concept of him not just using his powers for doing outward magic but that he needs to repeatedly tap his soul for the survival effect definitely paints a picture of burning through it much faster.

-

Oh good, Rowena and Sam are researching together (nerds) I guess while the cool dads take Jack bowling.

(unless proven otherwise)

-

Her questions about how we even have a Jack are very fair, especially as she implies Sam blew her off like "it's just some magic"... She may just be enquiring from professional interest, she can tell herself, but honestly, she's become so close to them, having her chilling with Sam, who is Dad no.1 and the most intimately connected to Jack issues for the most part, really does come across as catching up at a family gathering.

-

"Jack is alright, you don't need to worry" bitch we are in the first 5 minutes of a Yockey episode, I'm going to worry a LOT.

Rowena of course isn't able to read that dramatic irony so blows it off as Sam accusing her of emotion.

She changes the subject to Dean and Michael, which is ironic considering Dean switching the subject AWAY from that in 14x11.

-

OH this is the Brunch date and it's late at night coffee instead so I need to change my tag and also point out the shots were all so close on their faces it seemed like those overhead lights might have been the sun but we weren't getting and indication otherwise.

I whacked pause on the wide shot and I have to say anyone bitching about their seating arrangement hasn't thought about what I noticed while typing the above, which is how they're friggin cramped and as 2 six footer gentlement they're gonna not even fit opposite each other.

For filming reasons only, they're not snuggled up as same side of the booth people.

-

Filming reasons only.

-

Also in the previous scene i was feeling a shade disappointed that the "brunch" and Sam and Rowena's research date weren't going to be contrasted but instead Jack's outside learning how to bum cigarettes from bikers and starting to smoke, and Dean and Cas are having their coffee to avoid having to read any books.

I have to admit I listened to the latest Adventure Zone before starting this and no spoilers but it reaaaaally scratched the Party!Cas itch to the point of hysteria for me.

Anyway, puts the two pairs together after Rowena's open attempt to flirt a hello out of Cas, Cas has followed Dean out here to see how his head is and maybe share a sundae.

-

"They do have... many books" oh my god, Yockey reading my mind, immediatley confirms that Cas sucks at small talk but also didn't feel like reading and decided team nerd wasn't for him.

Jack takes after his father no.2 when it comes to bunking off classes and smoking behind the bike shed

-

Christ, though, the premise alone that Yockey sets up here that Dean n Cas are making awkward small talk about how many books Sam has. I wouldn't write that into a fic as too hilariously on the nose but Dean just agrees with Cas, sniffs, and silence falls into awkwardness.

-

Cas tries to catch Dean's eye like the good old days when he'd lean in, pick up his gaze, and carry it all the way up and lock it into place... But now Dean's scrunching his eyes in pain and Cas's attempt to make eye contact is cockblocked by Michael. Cas is openly employing this connection tecnique but Dean, who was also responsible for killing the conversation in the first place, is made unreceptive by this metaphor in his mind closest.

-

Cas isn't put off though, just compliments Dean on his incredible willpower, like, hey, Sam did it for like 2 minutes, I did it for maybe 30 seconds when it was Lucifer. You have his dick older brother in there and you're getting literal months out of it. But. Like. This is not accounting for the fact that MichAUl sucks.

-

BABY NOUGAT NO

His plaid jacket is brown which I wasn't 100% sure on in the mood lighting at the house, but I love how it's that nice earthy colour that puts him somewhere between the range of Cas's new coat and what his other dads might wear, though they're less brown by habit/colour coding.

Really, it's dark brown with pale lines in it which if anything you could say is the colour coding of a nougat bar.

Hi I am very stressed at the amount of Jack he just coughed up into his hand.

I also hate how we're getting the Dean n Cas conversation because Jack's sick and off hiding it in the bathroom.

-

At least the conversation is flowing and they're making eye contact now they're onto the deep angst instead of talking about how many books Sam has.

-

Gosh I love the legacy of Cas vs "fine" and now he just sadly says "no dean" when Dean says they're supposed to say they're fine, because he's moved beyond doing this because humans do it, and into a space where communication and trust are more important than putting on a brave face, and that lying about your personal internal strife is as bad as hiding plot secrets and oh wait aren't you going to be EATEN BY THE EMPTY and haven't told Dean?

-

Still. Progress.

-

"Well that's not sustainable" Cas says, as Jack in the other room is debating his soul vs his life and you know, the unsustainability of THAT

-

Jack goes ahead and fixes himself

-

Dean says to Cas to agree to throw him in the ocean again, which really makes this an exact mirror opposite conversation to 10x09 and the conversation about throwing him into the sun.

The "done" and then a bell goes "ding ding!" in the background is so darkly hilarious. IS it the answer?

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I love how far scooted over Dean was for Cas, meaning they WERE as close to opposite as they could get, knees notwithstanding, and at an understanding that Jack was sitting there before it means Dean moved over, unless Jack dived straight into the bathroom from the car.

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"See, look at that! Everybody's fine!"  
"What?"  
"nothing."

Just your dads being passive aggressive at each other :')

But yeah more dramatic irony lampshading that no one is fine and once again comparing Dean and Jack, as has been going on throughout, to the point that I'm almost terrified of the answer given the exact variables presented - coffin, ocean, michael, dean, jack, jack's sickness, jack's soul...

ding ding?

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Jack has an expression he must get a lot around Dean and Cas, of being very uncertain of exactly what dynamic is going on between them because it's all in the subtext and behind words they won't say in front of him. A lot of heavy pauses that are Dean n Cas fights that Jack can't even read.

-

Cas sighs, loses the argument for now, to the united front of Team I'm Fine, and changes the subject to the case.

-

They also jointly don't know what "liturgical" means and Cas despairs at them both, then Jack declares the killer a monster even if they're human and Dean says he's not wrong - Cas being on the opposite side of the table from them seems to be getting more and more distant after the intimacy of all that eye contact between Dean drawing them closer together.

-

Omg that Dean plaid (I think the super dark one from 10x10 though maybe just A Dark Plaid?) reeeeally sets off Jack as a Dean n Cas kid when you line them up like this with Cas at one end and Dean at the other, and Jack still wearing his thick jacket indoors when Dean has taken his (thinner) jacket off, just to get this EXCELLENT spectrum.

If dark brown plaid, warm brown plaid, Cas, is even a "spectrum"

-

Cas's definition of an AV club is funny because of Metatron but even funnier because of Metatron in 11x07

Dean gets in a barb about how Cas is That Nerd which this episode has already categorically denied with him choosing Team Coffee over Team Books and also Angels are Jocks, prove me wrong.

Cas just chose to fall and join team human which suddenly casts him as nerdy in contrast because he inherently knows words like "liturgical"

But Cas isn't about sports, he's about parties.

-

Let Dean have this one! He can learn pop culture versions of things and still at least have a grounding, right??

Team Nerd won't let him have it.

-

"Like a snake!" see, Dean knows Snake Facts too, which he may also have got from TV but also doesn't make him wrong.

-

Anyway they all agree that they don't know how to deal with him yet since he's uncatchable which being able to foretell their movements, so we cut to him picking up a trucker

This is really drawing on the siren episode HARD in terms of him picking up his prey and transmitting poison via a kiss - of course in the cab of a car, we're seeing the actuality of what would have been the subtext of when Dean got sirened by the flask. And making it clear that the gorgon picked up on the trucker's desire first, and that it was a mutual lean in before the poison took hold.

-

It's probably not good that Dean n Cas are immediately the ones on the scene alone together right after that implication is it?

-

Hey um where is Cas and Jack in Noah's note? He knows they're gonna be there and he doesn't even address it to "Dean n Cas" like a polite person would and then he mentioned Rowena and Sam are chasing him as well but that's not the whole squad!!

-

Ahaha then Cas immediately called it out and Dean just laughs it off that Cas isn't his type without really even knowing that Noah is seemingly into dudes or the parallel to the Siren scene where Dean totes would have fallen for the ruse and... yeah.

Not like Cas is Mr Heterosexual but as Rowena is proving, he's also not easy to casually flirt with unless you're Dean.

-

The phrasing about Rowena as a red-headed witch, in prophecy as well, calls right back to Yockey's 13x05 and that being one of the ways that Dean would die around that time... now they're running around together :D

-

Anyway they come up with a plan then Rowena comes up with a sub plan and smiles at Jack and Jack smiles back because he's now soulless enough to start to appreciate being a part of Evil Schemes (aunty rowena style)

-

OUR WEE DOGGIE IS SICK.

Well this undoes "Sam hit a dog" on a meta level in a hilarious way and also pairs Rowena and Sam like they're a married couple

now

where did they GET the doggie.

-

Is it Jack.

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"Can we not fight in front of the vet?"

-

"What's his name?"

"Jack." "Jack! :D"

.... you monsters. This is not parenting.

-

"You're the sweetest boy, aren't you?"

You just probed a toddler I hope you're happy

-

this is so hilarious and cute i can't handle it

puppy!Jack getting reaction shots which somehow look exactly like the way Jack looks at things with his guileless expression because Alex's way of acting Jack is already exactly at the dumb sweet innocent puppy range of emotion...

-

He's now wearing a jacket and shirt the exact colours of the puppy.

-

Hey, vet, this is on you for leaving the dog alone. Did you just assume the bench is too high that puppers wouldn't jump down from it and run away?

-

Or giant two year olds for that matter

-

Poor Jack. Poor poor Jack. They all know what he is implying >.> He goes and sits down rather gingerly...

-

Talking about Jack while he stares dead ahead without any curiosity or sign of emotion - er, is he okay? I mean

he's not but eep

-

Rowena is really pushing Sam about what happened to Jack and now betraying how MUCh concern is involved in order to get Sam to talk.

-

Om nom nom Rowena and Sam banter and her walking out of shot with her head high after accusing Sam of being the villain for using reckless magic.

I don't think so (although this calls back to THEIR brunch date over the Book of the Damned that started this all off) but for sure Lily was never anything other than tragically heroic despite being briefly seen as a villain until the whole story was known - as soon as it became a #metoo for angels, she was off the hook and she then died of noble sacrifice. Jack meanwhile did blink once while they were having this conversation but otherwise was in the foreground perfectly still and creepy, and now we're moving to territory of questioning the ethics of the decision, the cost of unnatural life, and what magic should be used for, none of which was important while Jack was dead. At least not to Sam. He says they're all being careful and that this isn't a problem, but Rowena has both the outside eyes and the experience of using magic for selfish ends to push Sam about this.

And it is interesting that this is being made out as a Sam thing because of course while he brought Lily in it wasn't even to do this so he and Dean made that decision together, but now he and Rowena are singled out for this storyline, and as Dad no.1 he's shouldering this narratively it seems.

-

Errr I'm not sure the recent trend of feminism has made women more cautious, I think women have always been scared of men but between increased independence accidentally also creating more isolation e.g. going places alone and increasing willingness to discuss it, it's actually become something people are aware of as a whole >.> Let's assume this is the monster talking and not social commentary, but it still makes me feel like in general he would have had a harder time picking off women than men historically if only because men felt so entitled to protect their womenfolk like property until we started telling them to quit it >.> This does feel like a lil flaw in the logic.

-

Uhoh, the bunker peeps. Getting reeeeeeally concerned that they're all the dead people in the bunker later D:

-

Also stressful: Jack leaping right up ready to go

-

I'm not a parent but if it's this much angst about your kid getting a papercut or a sore throat or losing their soul I'm not sure I want to be

-

And then super ironically just as I was about to type "who's at the door?" our own doorbell went and it turned out we were having dinner guests and I promptly lost my entire evening :P Morning... I am never ever going to be right on top of an episode again, am I?

-

Cas: "fuck doors"  
Jack: "dad..... you can..... open them....."

Someone lives here and you're going to save him and then on top of everything he'll have to pay for the door.

-

Oh no Jack's gonna get bitten by the snake, isn't he? Why did you bring the squishy nougat child... D: It's probably slithering up behind him right now while Noah is monologuing.

-

On the other hand, Cas is such a good egg going around healing the poor bloke in the background and I wubs him

-

That story is going to need some serious analysis that I as someone who only just finished their first coffee can not handle right now... Is that an aesop and was the scorpion and the frog also one? Because we're getting a lot of those thrown at Jack's nature in that case. I mean he wasn't even in 13x08 but it was still *about* him metaphorically :P

First of all a billion points to the peeps who made the comparison between Jack and the cute lil fluffy chick with a knife

second of all the monster is identifying with the snake so calling Jack the chicken might be a way of saying he might kill him and get the better of him

but he might just like the story because snake, but overall applying it to Jack as a question is very complicated out of that context. I mean the chicken is sacrificing its own baby to spite the snake - and Jack is burning up his soul to fight monsters if he does end up doing what we don't want him to do... Being the chicken isn't just about winning, but choosing to make a sacrifice like that... And if Jack's the snake it could be a metaphor about him winning hunts until one kills him. But eh. Tired. Metaphors are easier when they're not spoken aloud and left for vague interpretation :P Visual and implied ones are usually more on the nose to make them easier to connect. This and scorpion and the frog are very deliberately just put out there to consider with no answers as fables are meant to make us think.

-

Awww Cas no

Whenever he falls over I always instinctively expect the floor to crack. I think 4x16 messed me up forever with the Cas and Uriel fight where they demolished the set and 10 years later I'm still just expecting Cas to be like, neutron star heavy.

-

Also props to Noah for once again being braver than the siren and kissing mid-combat.

Like the love spell in previous Yockey shenanigans, we have a visual of someone getting a chaste kiss on the cheek and swooning as a result, but, you know, obviously gross and awful :P But playing into a twee romantic trope for the visuals.

-

snake metaphor, or snetaphor

-

... yeah the coffee still hasn't worked

-

"Hello Dean it's nice to meet you in person"  
*Sam looks around to see if he's invisible, spots a very pissed off Cas*

-

BABY'S FIRST BEHEADING!

I'm so proud of him :D

-

OH NO he's gonna use his power because his cool dads (no offense Sam, you're a nerd dad) are both down for the count

this is the most boring Dean n Cas asleep together scene ever

-

Cas's eyes like "LEAVE ME RIGID HERE ON THE FLOOR FOREVER BOY"

... "i'm a billion years old I'll walk it off eventually"

... "empty won't come for me while I'm frozen solid anyway"

-

Meanwhile, Michael is throwing the biggest bitch fit of the century and holding Dean hostage if he's going to be so rude as to hold HIM hostage.

Well this is going to go terribly.

Especially now we're back at the bunker with all the squishable AU Hunters

-

if they took dean to a hospital the x ray would show brain activity in the shape of two raised middle fingers

-

"I can help"  
"GO TO YOUR ROOM"

-

Uhoh, Auntie Rowena heard what Cas said about his soul so THAT is a conversation she has to have with Sam now. See how Cas likes being the extra in the room between Sam and someone he's got a thing going with.

-

Dean having a full-body spasm to keep Michael in seems like a suggestion he's been literally clenching him in all this time and I am very worried about his digestion now.

-

Jack kept the snake because of course he's the sort of kid to have a pet snake now that he's going evil.

Maybe he'll pose with it and be like "Look dad I'm you off the season 6 poster"

-

because he has no soul, gettit?

-

also: snake is removed from gorgon context and placed in son-of-lucifer context

I have to say after binging all of Riverdale with my mum over the last few months, this is actually pretty subtle satan imagery going on here.

-

"Jack"  
"Oh, hi dad, I was just planning on sitting here staring into space until you needed me next, what's up?"

-

Okay he is actually really emotional still, and he would be to do dumb stuff like heal Cas, but...

-

"What's the point of being a cosmic being if everyone I care about is just going to... leave" sweet child, no you can not go down that route D:

Drop by and hang out with them in Heaven or something if you like, don't get into the almighty being route D:

Also hearing Cas talk about this is the worst, and I can't imagine a worse fate for him than outliving Sam and Dean for a jillion years and thinking about the world after they're gone, except he won't even do that because the Empty will get him before they die most likely, and even if Cas and Jack somehow do wander into eternity together as a happy ending it's going to be bittersweet leaving Sam and Dean behind because they're the core of their world and that's just... awful. Cutting off a limb to live forever. Or burning up your soul to do it >.> Jack.

-

Also Jack seems to have a radioactive halflife of about six weeks

-

Anyway that's what we're dealing with right now, so maybe there's a happy middle ground where Cas doesn't have to outlive them and be all emo about it and Jack maybe actually makes it to his 3rd birthday

-

Imagine the goofy end of season episode where they bake Jack a cake with 3 whole candles in it as the cold open before the end of season nonsense hurts. I say only to inflict that image on you all before we can continue on with our lives. The important thing is that you thought it and it might hurt but -

-

"We all have to appreciate the time we all have together now" So go bang Dean when he wakes up, Cas, you hypocrite

-

You know most fathers and sons fight about normal shit, not being cosmic beings with a responsibility to enjoy life or fuck up

-

Oh no they're going to attempt to interpret the chicken and egg story which means that whatever they decide can only ever be half right in a narrative sense (as they can't know things on the level we do and Yockey is doing his job wrong if he gives us the answer) which is going to add to the headache

-

Ugh it's thursday and I'm still mad at Yockey and mad at Cas so I may just skip handling this scene at this point >.>

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I'm so glad Jack called Cas out for how awful it is that Cas sits there thinking about outliving Sam and Dean, and I think this puts Cas at a moral authority disadvantage and then he said that the snake story was about greed or giving up the thing you love to kill what you hate, and I just wildly fundamentally disagreed with him about why Noah told the story to Jack especially when he was talking about FATE and what Jack might do with his powers, and what his purpose was with it I couldn't even get past that one word.

Like I don't wanna fight Cas but I will and he's imparting all this stuff to Jack and Jack's the questioning child and I just can't make my brain go galaxy brain large enough to handle this treatise on life and parenthood that we're being fed with Jack and Cas >.>

-

god I could fight Cas

-

BECAUSE HE IS RIGHT THAT JACK SHOULDN'T USE HIS POWERS AND JACK IS RIGHT TO BE ANGRY AT THE FUTILITY OF HAVING THE POWER TO HELP BUT BEING TOLD NOT TO SACRIFICE

And they want to make a next generation that isn't as fucked up as them but what moral ground do they even have to tell Jack not to sacrifice himself

there's like, so much more and this is just scratching the surface of it all and maybe I should have just watched and let someone else do the thinking for me and some of being mad at Cas is being mad at myself for also not having a proper grasp on what this all means and what would be the right thing to tell Jack in this scenario

-

remember when jack was a cute puppy

-

Thank god something is happening down the hall

-

AAAH MICHAEL GOT OUT D:

-

Just like he smashed up the store room, Dean smashes up the infirmary in a kind of fit of just woken up madness looking for Michael before he manages to come to his senses and explain

-

MAGGIE D:

some of the others look like a wild animal got to them rather than just being smited

oh my god D:

So ends the AU hunter project D: and I guess why it was a good thing all their main peeps like Bobby and Charlie are always off being emo while these guys hang out here.

-

Noooooooo michael!Rowena D: oh no oh n o oh nooo I guess remote smiting is something you can do when you're in the most powerful witch ever.

-

It's okay, she'll be fine, Sam is the only one who can kill her and Sam can't kill Michael by himself.

-

I hope.

-

Ahahaha Michael threatens her and she's like, I'm immortal to you, bitch, and he presumably hears, if I possess you, I'M THE IMMORTAL BITCH.

Gyah.

-

Remember when Rowena took one look at the adorable coughing Jack and said "oh bollocks" or whatever? Yep, that was the omen of her caring about another adorable child like the wee oskar or whoever it was from 10x23... All those misplaced, belated guilty maternal feelings that have been haunting her through the centuries... and Jack is the crystalline form of adoptable wee boys :P

-

AU where she and Sam ran off together with their adorable puppy in order to run scams and heists centred around a wee little doggy getting into places a regular inside man couldn't :P

-

Inside Nougat

-

Oh great, Jack is randomly immune to being thrown around by Michael, or he realises being Rowena means he's the Auntcle uniting two branches of the family throwing itself at adopting Jack... Nice Auntir Rowena and evil AUncle Michael, and they're going to pay the MOST to get you into an elite university.

(Hey at least taking this long to get around to watching these parts mean I have that news story to quip about instead of good intelligent meta :P)

-

It was nice of Yockey to give Ruthie some more evil speeches to do.

-

Michael knocks Jack and that conveniently makes his hair flop forward into the more appropriate style for the kid so he can be all scary

-

Jack, stop wasting your batteries by making your eyes glow

it's such a weak little glow compared to how it used to be, all cosmic yellow eyes. Now it's just a white glow from inside. :(

-

Great, now the lesser dad squad of the CW (sorry, Riverdale now has a spot of eternal commemoration you're not going to match although it would be hilarious to do a side by side of their Hot Dad Squad) has to watch their kid go after Michael like he's wanted all along D: It's been exactly a year in episode count since he swore to kill him.

-

Revenge isn't good for you... But Jack started the episode coughing again, and using his powers to keep himself alive and feeling like there was a very limited time for himself anyways if this is the impermanence of the spell, and Cas gave him the big talk about being immortal, but that SUCKS if everyone you love dies, so why not not even be the chicken, but be that final hardboiled egg? >.>

-

he is a wee baby chick with a knife, remember.

-

"I am the son of Lucifer, I am a hunter, I AM A WINCHESTER"

baby!!!!!!

Sorry, he's not a kid. he's a grown up adult toddler who has been terrifying from the start but at least has managed to come to terms with himself in many important self-defining ways... From his horrible father to his career to his real family...

I guess that means Cas is officially Castiel Winchester too?

At the beginning of the season we had a big push for Jack's identity as a Kline not to be forgotten either so really we need a Kline-Winchester surname for him or like, Jack W. Kline or something, idk.

Cas can have Winchester as his middle name too.

-

Honestly the level of emotion I feel for Jack is almost exactly the same I felt this morning when my friend who is a primary school teacher sent me a gif of all her baby frog spawns who are now tadpoles

-

OMG JACK WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH MICHAEL?

It's convenient that once exorcised he's like a big white snake and... again... if Jack smushes him, he's the hardboiled egg....

-

Except he just ATE MICHAEL

Arghhhh

-

baby you have at least 2 dads who can sit you down for a talk about cannibalism for power.

-

"Jack?"

For the love of god, Yockey, include the line, "did you just eat michael" from someone

season 7 is half the length of the show ago and we NEED the hilarity of casual lines about eating people whole again

-

"I'm me again!"

Oh no, Jack, nougat, cookie... little duckling... adorable handbag puppy... I don't think you are D:

I mean at least you have replaced one archangel grace influence for another (consumed whole rather than in part I guess) and yay it's not Lucifer's, even though we confirmed early on in season 13 Jack didn't get the toxic part (Kelly had antibodies against that to pass on???) there is maybe also the symbolism of him swearing a vicious I MUST KILL MY UNCLE rivalry then actually enacting it and eating him whole and regaining his power as a result of such a big kill...

Also this does mean that the Box Method did technically put them on this path just because it shook all these dominoes into these places which is really all that happens with fate in this show

But yeah. Jack's soul took a thrashing and that's WAY more concerning to me long term, and at least I think will be behind a lot of instant grow up power thrown at him narratively to skip a lot of baby growing up time by scraping off the adorable fluff faster than regular time would do it to his characterisation. Like, that is, using this arc to justify writing him as more adult in the future when he's only 2 because as I've been musing since they brought this up, it would make him more edgy which of course as a snake owning teen he does seem to be on the way towards...

-

Also the visual of him spreading his wings with Rowena prone below him and all the dead bodies around him is a horrifying image, in the sense of how it would look to gif this wing spread and have all of Michael's chaos around him at the sort of expense of getting his sense of identity back, both claiming his personal feelings about it and getting his grace back.

Of course, reclaiming immortality moments after talking with Cas and realising how terrible it could be.

-

You better bring Maggie back now

-

Hrm. Last shot just a close up of his smiling serene face and glowing eyes, and cut to credits, no actions from our cosmic candy bar.


	15. 14x15

14x15 watching notes

wow it feels like I was doing this just yesterday

-

Ahahahaha the recap immediately starts with goofy music, and the conversation about Jack keeping the snake - over the reminder of how Dean was terrified of the snake in 4x06, exactly as I wished. I am immediately 100% satisfied with this episode.

We've all written a great deal about the meta implications of Dean's snake fear as presented back in Yellow Fever in all that glorious context, but I think it's fair to say that Felix is representing a Lot of Dean's nonsense in the way that we can just distill any reaction he has that is like 4x06 into an entire compounded diamond of the queer subtext of 4x06, and just leave it at that for now :P

-

Meghan, of course, is Dabb's lil no homo intern who did her homework and read the Destiel primer some fan mailed in and then tweeted it, so I'm just, like, ear to ear grin at the news she was writing an episode for us.

-

Was... there extra sound over the snake bit in 4x06 that concealed Dean's whimper about it that in the recap here the sound doesn't cover? I feel like that whimper is new content I do not remember from before.

-

Anyway after the cuteness of the Felix thing, the awfulness continues with the real recap of all the angst.

(Does Jack even know Felix is called Felix or will he rename the snek?)

-

PLEASE RESURRECT MAGGIE

-

They cut "I am a hunter" from Jack's declaration, just with "I am the son of lucifer, I am a Winchester!" which shows the almost black and white dichotomy of influence on him in this way.

-

Killing Michael, of course, while now a snake aligned character a la soulless Sam in the season 6 poster, and declaring oneself the son of Lucifer, does make the moment where Jack eats Michael whole rather more sinister in the terms of how Michael and Lucifer constantly define themselves by that fight, at least in the early seasons and once AU Michael was around. AU Michael killed our Lucifer via Dean's hand, then our Lucifer's son (again at a remove beyond just being the AU pairs mixed up) eats AU Michael, so the dynamic is mixed up in a blender but always played out this way. You could almost say Jack's instant and determined revenge mission to kill Michael was an inevitable genetic trait, just as Sam and Dean inherited John's mission. John said he wanted them to have a life after, but it was still AFTER killing (and not eating) Azazel.

-

This guy running has the similar shoes and turned up jeans that Lucifer sported so I'm inclined not to like him just on costuming parallels. Hipsters get it bad in this show.

He runs past a Scooby Doo matinee, and I hope that is the wacky movie that recently had the meme about Shaggy being a god come from it because, look, meme intertextuality can be a Thing here.

Also then Sam & Ev's records. Dunno who Ev is but obviously Sam is hard not to think of our Sam, and the promo pics show mr rogers!Sam paired with his 50s housewife so a Sam depicted holding hands with a girl surrounded by music sure has some immediate warning on the episode content :P

-

He then runs to the Harrington's milkshake set we got the BTS shots of, and sure enough their giant glowing milkshake brings the boy to the yard?

-

"Have you had your milkshake today?" what is this, Riverdale?

-

Okay, not subtle :P The "Charming Acres" where "everyone is happy" with the 50s aesthetic is perfect, and also I'm super glad I am now a Riverdale fan on the side because dear lord wtf is that show but also how the heck is it perfect to balance with SPN thematically and I write essays in my head when watching the other... Anyway we get some corny romance kiss and overblown romantic dialogue with these lovers in distress and off he goes.

Obviously just as Riverdale's mirror sign, the "town with pep!" is always used as an ironic counterpoint to the nonsense going on within, this one just underlines the horror lurking beneath suburbia and "perfect" small town life, a common theme in American media maybe just due to the relentless pushing of the idea of 50s white picket fence suburban perfection and how of course that drives people insane in reality hence the zillions of movies about it. For some reason, maybe just because we had it on tape and it was the 90s, we watched The Burbs about a zillion times when we were kids, and it's left a lasting fascination for this bizarre culture. Edward Scissorhands is another gothic movie that riffs on it with that fantastic opening in particular that's such a film nerd bait in the visual set up... Anyway obviously there's the actual Pleasantville but I haven't seen it so I can't really comment except I assume it is so like this.

-

Hooray, he made it out of town limits, to "Cloverhill" which makes me think "cloverdale" so I'm still worried about him :P

-

He seems to be having serious issues leaving the town? Even though he's been panicked the whole time we didn't get this noise/headache stuff before.

-

Poor, poor Griffin.

-

Gross.

-

Of course we immediately meet Jack wearing all-black and playing with Felix

-

"I'm good, Castiel"

I could CRY

How dare you call him Castiel. Take that back and start calling him "pop" immediatley.

-

"Peace of Mind" ohh because his brain exploded

-

gross

-

Cas points out it could be about the hunters bringing Jack down and that he's mourning, and we know how much it hurt Jack to lose "his men" during his boy king phase in the AU and immediately after, the first time Maggie died especially, but... eep. The visuals of Jack's teenagerhood are really uncomfortably close to also what happens when you're turning evil, even if wearing all black and going to your pet for comfort are traits of sad people when not on TV and holding a snek.

-

I do adore how much this season has had Cas and Jack stuff because one of the things in season 13 which was unsettling was the instabond between them and how even when they were getting to know each other it felt fake, and how they barely had any time, and in the end of the season we had Jack struggling as if he had to pick between Cas, Lucifer, and Sam (Dean is a given but also didn't want to play as much as the others) and Cas lost out pretty hard to the Lucifer vs Sam stuff, so even when Sam won it, Cas of course barely got a good moment with Jack except 13x06. Whereas we've had them having a whole arc and usually are together off-screen so the sense they're actually bonding means that NOW what they have/had seems/seemed really real.

Anyway of course as soon as it was perfect, Jack got broken and now he has his back to Cas, and is talking formally to him and it's all so sad and distant :(

-

Of course there's a bunch of metaphor here, that really does overlay a growing up experience that teenagers can become depressed and lose their sense of self very easily. I deal with this a LOT in my own writing when writing teens because, well, it's just part of growing up and transitioning into whoever you ACTUALLY are as an adult on the other side. Not that your childhood self is invalid, it's just eventually going to be a different person from who you end up being. Jack's being sped through it, but puberty and life changes like changing schools/big exams/pressure of encroaching adult life like first jobs, learning to drive, university applications etc can also feel like it's all being rushed before you're ready. My 3rd book coming out this summer has a teen in a very transitional period dealing with all this and a soullesness metaphor at the same time, so I've pretty much written 1st person POV and may even be TOO CLOSE to this in a way because I have spent so much time working on embodying this conflict and how to personify it in character choices.

I mean in this specific case I am the expert you bring onto the panel show to be a talking head on what's up with Jack.

-

"How's the snake" "i don't think he's feeling well. he won't eat" yeah when you don't have a soul you kinda stop sleeping and stuff but you barely did that anyway

as i said last episode, snake metaphor or "snetaphor"

Cas is applying it too: "he's been through a lot of change in a short period of time"

Exactly how many parenting books for moody teens have you read if you read 300 baby books?

-

He floated the pencil!

I'm so sad.

Especially with taking Jack back to Donatello this really does feel like going back to early Jack and the fears we had about him, like, he went down the good branch of ways this could all go but now it's turned and he's going down the other route...

-

He's also whooshing the pencil around in an infinity symbol

or...

oroborus

-

At least these are two of the most direct, sometimes blunt characters so they can just be like, hey so much soul do you have left? and Jack's like idk but I'm trying not to think about it

but in that scary kinda detached way where he's not seeming concerned about it in a huge angsty way, just an awareness that it's maybe a problem and something he might have to deal with

And when Cas asked, Jack dropped the pencil to the floor without concern for the lead inside breaking

-

Dean is assembling a sandwich that would make Shaggy and Scooby proud

I think they really bonded with them in a meaningful and lasting way tbh

-

Ooh Cas came in like "you were going to sleep until the cows dragged you home" - his interpretation of the saying is more literal, that the cows coming home is more about how they force you to action. Rather than it being a measure of a very long, indefinite time based on the cows taking a long ass time to get home, giving you plenty of time to sleep.

-

It's sweet that Dean and Cas are doing a check in on all their loved ones like, Dean has news on Rowena, Cas has news on Jack... the two of them keeping each other informed and sort of solidifying that they're a unit around which the others orbit - including how they have concern about Sam, which gives us this impression that Dean and Cas are the only mostly-functioning parts of this family, and their unit is bonded out of concern for everyone else that they're going to be the responsible adults for.

Dean always calls Jack "the kid" but it's sort of extra sad that he's concerned but with all the other shades of the early part of Jack's life around it feels like an extra reminder that what's now an affectionate way to refer to Jack came from how resistant Dean once was to bonding with him.

-

Noooo sam has dead AU hunters PTSD :( because of course leader!Sam was such a thing at the start of the season and that's all been taken away from him too - it was all so much about Jack and I only finished last episode yesterday so I never even had time to think about all the implications and that Sam also had this strong connection to them and built up what looked like his happy endgame around being the boss of them... People who respected him and called him "chief" and didn't see him as a part of a unit with Dean and him as the little brother so Dean was automatically in charge even though they're both grown adults... something he seems to feel no matter how much their casual hunting set up is 100% mutually respectful, of course emotionally when the going gets tough their drama always goes that way, and Sam being the one who had to worry about Dean AND lead people was so good for him...

... until it isn't, now :(

-

He's got a bit scruffy again, probably as much as Jared could grow in the time :(

-

Sam's been through a LOT lately and only one thing was validating, and the rest was awful

-

He grips his tablet for a grounding to reality - work - and we cut to Dean holding a similarly sized object - his scooby doo sandwich - which he chomps into. Coping mechanisms parallel ahoy

-

Cas: "why am I the only functional adult here?"  
Dean: "I am a functional adult" *chomp*  
Cas: "Okay I will treat you as a functional adult too but I have my eye on you"

-

"Teleplay by Meghan Fitzmartin"

MY GIRL

I followed her on twitter ages back, forgot who she was entirely while not using twitter, rediscovered her as a random cool person I followed this year, and suddenly she's recently become a SPN writer and it's like, OH, of course that's who she is.

-

Sam comes in at a fucking run with his case

move move move move move don't stop to think don't stop to breathe

-

"Well, I'm leaving in 10" *disappears*  
"Okay, sam, not good."

Yeah, Dean n Cas as the dynamic duo, the pairing who despite Dean's lingering whatever from the Michael ordeal, is still upright and savvy and as usually keeping a new door closed on the trauma of the old door getting busted open.

Cas collects trauma as much as the rest but has much much deeper recesses in his mind to put it.

The two of them working together is like the definition of two becoming one functional adult. Performing functionality for each other instead of just both of them individually finding different quiet places to scream forever means they can be the rational arbitrators of their messed up brother and son... Using whatever strength they pull from the other to prop themselves up enough to be in this position.

-

Cas volunteering to go with Sam is also good because not only does Cas do it because he thinks Dean might be what Jack needs in this dark time (Jack choosing to spend his last day on earth with Dean is presumbly not forgotten) but separating Sam and Dean and getting Sam to open up to Cas when they're alone does help in the sense that Sam and Dean have very specific walls they've relied on for all the years they've hunted together, as well as their childhoods - Cas being the 3rd wheel as he is doing here in MAGNIFICENT form may be a way to offer support to Sam that he would be unwilling to let Dean do just on habit, as well as Dean spending some time with Jack can be good for Dean, too, if their fun bonding experiences actually are as nice as fishing together, Cas may assume.

He's very mercenary at planning some things and he's the one who comes out with plans such as saying Dean should be the soul bomb to get at Amara or whatever. He has a pretty vicious tactical mind and applying it to social engineering his PTSD-ridden family is a new and novel application for it but very much a welcome and wonderful change, as well as excellent to see him in charge of all these losers and though he has his shit too, and of course probably is deeply hurt by what's up with Jack, he's quickly shaken up all these factors and come up with in the moment the best set up to try and deal with it all.

It's very much a moment that he and Dean are the responsible adults designating which traumatised family member to nurture for the next few days.

-

Dean stills rolls his eyes on habit at the concept of Jack looking up to him, but Jack already murdered him with the last day on earth stuff a lil while ago so it's pretty much purely performative/aimed at Cas for using that line on him as emotional manipulation rather than as it might have been back in like 13x04 when Sam was trying to tell Dean that Jack the intern wasn't so bad and they might look after him.

-

"I was not great with Sam" Listen, you were also a traumatised fuck up in season 6, and you LEARNED from it. Sure, the last time you had to help a soulless family member he ended up almost patriciding Bobby, but we grow from our mistakes, so there's only a... moderate chance... Jack ends up... nearly grand-patriciding AUBobby... D:

-

I have to say the fact that element is available did not occur to me at the beginning of that sentence.

-

Cas leaves on a snark about the cows come home and "that's the saying" and the two of them are so completely married with their fond irritation at their absolutely indispensible significant other, it's gross gross gross :'D

-

Wheee another shot of the Charming Acres sign in daylight... doesn't seem so sinister, does it? :D

-

Cas has what looks like the silver version of Gadreel's car so I'm just gonna go lie on the floor

-

Also he's driving and Sam is happy to let him do that - he used to take over Cas's car back in the season 9/10 era at times, but recently Sam has continued to be a passenger to Cas, and that's nice.

Trust and also a sign that Cas is getting better at driving.

-

"Exploding heads... sounds like a witch." Sam going down the same logic as last episode when Rowena protested that it wasn't always witches and sure enough it wasn't.

Honestly she caused them enough problems with exploding heads that they have enough reason to suspect witches and possibly even rowenas as the suspect by sheer numbers, but it's definitely a problem they have of lazy thinking, of starting with a conclusion and coming to confused dead ends rather than dealing with things more methodically... Back in the day when they knew less they actually had better methods just because they were so perpetually baffled by the world.

-

Sam starts yawning and Cas immediately chastises and Sam immediately waves him off.

I suspect this has been the summary of their roadtrip

-

"I'm good, I'm good, honestly."  
"i know. everybody's good."

Cas accidentally mirroring the town slogan with his sarcasm.

Accidentally for him, very deliberately by Meghan.

-

"Just because I'm tired doesn't mean the monsters are going to stop"

that's grounds for zapping him to sleep and leaving him locked in a spa...

Sam wakes up in a bubble bath with a face mask on: "whaaa?"

But yeah this is something he and Dean both struggle with (the monsters thing not the spa thing although that would be a fun problem to have) - in 5x11 most tragically Dean had that line with his fake doctor about having to save everyone, but this isn't just something that plagues his mentality towards hunting. Whenever they're too caught up in it or resisting with full-force, the sheer weight and responsibility gets to them and they're perpetually feeling like all the lives of everyone are on their shoulders.

In this case, Sam is in the hiding his emotions in hunting phase, specifically with the flavour of having not been able to save people he cared about and felt responsible for, and so even though that particular evil was spectacularly devoured by his son, the ongoing problem of evil is now the scapegoat for his feelings of helplessness and loss about Maggie and co. And this is the pure expression of burning himself up in self-punishment for that, trying to do enough good to make it okay to sleep again without them weighing on him.

-

"Plus, we don't have as many hunters as we used to"

-

*resumes eating cookies out of sympathetic misery*

-

Griffin has the same haunted empty look as Jack does. Ah, trauma

-

Cas's pop culture strikes again :')

After 9x18: "hurr blurr giving Cas pop culture will ruin him"

After 9x22: "this was the bestworst thing to ever happen to Cas"

And of course, in the context of a Sam n Cas jaunt :')

-

"He had that look" oh dear.

Griffin seems to be genre savvy to the pleasantville creepiness anyway

-

"Weird how?"

Cut to: a town of fucking hipsters all dressed in their 50s get up

-

listen.

this is spooky in an Americana way, but you have to know that I can leave my house, walk down to the town, and in 10 minutes be surrounded by this vibe except as well as 50s there's every other era from Georgian up and also everyone is a pirate or witch or druid. So to me it's less the whole... everyone's in historical get up for no reason... vibe. It's more that they're in UNIFORM historical get up and that they've collectively chosen to look like this rather than just going wild and looking like however they want to that is truly scary. The hivemind vs the pure hipster nonsense I am surrounded with.

-

Cas makes another pop culture reference, this time specifically about how he entertains himself when the others are asleep, and Sam does a wild double take like he doesn't even know this Cas. Dean is intimately familiar with party!Cas and even has forced some of the movies on him, but Sam... Sam is usually a step behind on Cas.

You're about to go for a fucking ride, Sam.

I mean, reading old magazines is like... pretty boring dadstiel activity but it's still Cas entertaining himself with random humanity on a prosaic level and then applying it in everyday life which gives Sam a double take.

-

No bars? Guys. You are in a town with no phone signal and everything's weird. You've timetravelled without the timetravel and also remember Croatoan??

-

Hang on is this the woman who is Sam's 50s housewife in the promo pics?

-

I think the milkshakes are turning the people into this.

I think I've uncovered, in the same moment, why the people of Riverdale are Like That too.

Pop Tate has been manipulating them since the 50s

-

"Maybe they're mormon?"

I feel like Cas has a lot he's not saying about Mormons

-

"Your first one is free!!" this was literally how Hiram Lodge got everyone in Riverdale hooked on fizzle rocks and all the teen protagonists were like "blah blah textbook knowledge of how drug lords operate as if I have swallowed a criminal law book".

Honestly, those kids terrify me on a fundamental level.

-

Even CAS knows this place is weird.

-

And the milkshake dealer plops milkshakes in front of them as they're sitting down and repeats the mantra about the first one being free.

This is the time for Sam's fake(?) lactose intolerace to rear its head.

We get a wide shot with a cream pie forgrounded and this is 100% just set dressing to remind us that Misha and Jared will smash each other in the face with one at a moments' notice, and honestly I would not even risk betting on the fate of this prop pie.

-

Nope, Sam drank the kool aid.

-

Cas right calls out that they have barely even arrived so how can there be gossip about them.

-

The mayor runs the milkshake shop.

Honestly the fact this HASN'T been a riverdale plot surprises me more.

-

I suspect the Mayor most of all because he recognises that they live in an old fashioned way, while the others are entirely oblivious to the modern world so don't have the context to talk about it that way.

Also he runs the town and also the milkshake shop from which the evil eminates.

-

Cas's bluntness about "his head exploded" stops the entire town dead because they do not handle this sort of intrusion into their bubble well.

-

"Like a ripe melon on the sun"

on.

ON the sun.

D-do angels lob things at the sun when they're bored? Like teens throwing rocks at cars except... cosmic

-

That is not a house, that is a cake.

-

"It's kinda nice" Sammy noooo, think of your HAIR.

I think Cas's "strangely" picturesque was a polite way of saying "disturbingly"

At least I got to see a nice doggo smiling as much as its owners, even if the doggo wasn't kuma

-

"Small town! Come on in." This is T E R R I F Y I N G. No one has ever cheerfully opened the door for them to come in and investigate.

Although last time Dean was in the 40s he did manage to take advantage of a similar mentality to shove his way in as a termite inspector.

-

also mirroring an iconic Sam n Cas adventure where Cas wanted to explode the door of the poor psychic they were bothering for a line to Heaven

-

We got 14 minutes into the episode before Dean works up the energy to get out of bed and see how the kid is doing

-

Feeding his snek still.

-

Oh he's hanging out in the kitchen. Wonderful, put your snetaphor on the kitchen table which is also a metaphor for the heart of the family. Yeah. Sure.

-

He's also experimenting with foods Felix will eat, and again this start of this season had a lot of Jack trying to work out what foods he likes and what as a human he could enjoy.

-

"Do snakes like bacon?" see there's still some Jack in there, not only because he cares so much about the snake but because he innocently and wholeheartedly wants to listen to Dean's suggestions and takes him on trust this might be a good idea.

-

"Dri-hiiiii-ve" Dean finds some mice which are probably yelling at him because remember that time he could talk to animals and it turned out mice have adorable high pitched voices and a disturbing amount of awareness of their surroundings?

-

I mean he's just a wuss around animals, being scared of mice, cats, dogs, and snakes to name a few. He also personally hates at least one horse.

-

Dean is a multitude

-

Jack reacts to being asked to go outside with "a hunt?" in very weighty terms, because like Sam he appears to be defining himself as a hunter and with Jack in this dark place, a need to hunt and possibly the whole, kill things and do this because it's what we are and so on recursive loop of identity that made soulless!Sam such a good and dedicated hunter is pulling on Jack here. Though it was cut from the recap, he did choose it as an identity beyond just a job in that moment, and certainty about who you are is just plain terrifying to me when characters do it.

IRL, it's awesome.

-

"Would you like some bacon?"

Jack is still so sweet. Definitely the snake is giving us some sense he has ongoing compassion even if he's withdrawn a bit, and his behaviour towards it is not only kind but comments like that still show some essential Jack-ness, and in a way it's more like, having to investigate IF something is wrong or how much is just Jack being in a weird moody place because he's not doing all the soulless weird stuff like drawing on the walls in his own blood or random coldblooded murder that others do.

-

Even though Sam has been milkshake-poisoned already he also uses getting coffee as an excuse to let Cas investigate - whether it's all the food and drink here or just your "daily milkshake" (brr) - there's definitely an aspect of Sam getting drawn further and further in just because he's consuming here. Cas, as a non-food eater, presumably remains the responsible adult who can be ??? about Sam's horrifying transformation we saw in the promo pics.

Considering Jack is trying to feed Felix as his main concern, Dean was eating a sandwich loaded with references to his cartoon buddies and his own sense of stability and recovery, and Sam's being drawn into this horror show via milkshakes, food and consumption is a blatant theme and it's not missing me at all that Yockey co-wrote the story and also last episode with the snetaphor about the eggs which also applied to Jack who then ate Michael.

I have a feeling this might somehow all be connected.......................

-

Cas gets a long look from the boarding house owner about morals and single men staying here but not single women, to which our dear angel is like ???? but then he proceeds to lift the mattress up and find all the letters under it.

I'm assuming it was Mittens I was talking to about this but there's a kind of gross metaphor of Jack lurking alone in his room petting his snake, when we're talking about him being now a teen by emotional reckoning... And here's Cas finding these letters in the classic "hide the porn" place, and the ~morals~ zomg of single men wooing women...

Again, the show narrows its eyes at heterosexual nonsense, throwing back to a time when a man and a woman might have an illicit affair that in today's standards is a non-issue as we know and understand that young people get together and have *whispers* premarital hanky panky

But also of course, using heterosexuality as a metaphor for queerer things... illicit but consensual and no harm except to ridiculous ~morals~ relationships bring up huge rainbow flags for a metaphor. If (conrad?) the guy ran out of town because he was in his last stages of rationality before being consumed by the madness and could see how stupid it was to be controlled like this into thinking these things, and was trying to get out only for the spell to explode him because he got out of town bounds...

Almost like a flip of what was being explored in the cold open of 11x19 with Jesse wanting to leave and the blatant metaphors of the Chitters, which were heterosexualy pairing to mate in their own horror show.

-

Anyway I do love Cas being connected to all this and having to suss out a story with romance at its heart.

-

elizabethrobertajones  
NO SAM PUT THE TINY CUP DOWN  
of all the soulless sam season 6 redux things  
I was expecting the season 6 poster snake  
like

mittensmorgul  
HAAA RIGHT?!

elizabethrobertajones  
that sort of nonsense was not even to be blinked at  
but then SAM AND A TINY CUP  
this is how we evoke season 6 huh?

mittensmorgul  
:')

-

"She spends a fair bit of time talking about the shape and heft of his - "  
"OKAY"

Yeah, poor Conrad exploded because well he was ready to have a very different head explode.

Snetaphor.

-

Anyway Cas has read graphic porn about a dude and was completely chill about absorbing that information and Sam is ... not so cool with Cas telling him :P

-

"Tomorrow"  
"Tomorrow?"

Sam, do not sleep here. DO NOT SLEEP HERE.

Cas is not concerned just because you haven't slept for days and suddenly want to, on a personal basis. This place is fucking terrifying.

-

Cas standing in front of a picture of crashing waves against cliffs, hugely romantic and even sexual imagery

-

Oh there's a pot roast involved.

-

THERE is the hellish 50s cooking we were dreading. Thankfully no gelatine but

-

Uhoh Sam broke the husband... he remembers "cellphone"

His head is gonna blow

-

"Is something wrong, darling?"  
"I... want... candy crush... is that a... food?"

-

UHOH he had a daughter oh no he's remembering oh no oh no

-

Is this a crypt scene redux where the memory of his child pulls him back from mind control but at what cost

-

"Who are you?!" the horror of is she part of this too or is she the one causing it?

-

Ooh the poor conrad guy exploded over a phone too.

Is this commentary about cellphones because I feel like that is going to need some unpacking. These pre-phone people need them as lifelines or they remember their daughter through one as a fond memory and the pre-phone society is definitely a horror show of personal interaction with huge grins taking the place of social media so we can all get our gossip there and ignore each other on the streets like civilised people in the real world... :P

-

Gross.

-

"Honey?"

Oh dear. They really have no perception of the badness of all this.

-

Heheheh Dean really doesn't like having a snake behind him where he can't see it.

-

Oh no, Jack's not hungry. Oh no.

Dean suggests feeding the snake instead.

-

elizabethrobertajones  
............................  
angel food cake or devil food cake  
subtle, Dean  
subtle

mittensmorgul  
so subtle  
The cakes have deep subtextual meaning

elizabethrobertajones  
they're creme filled  
I'm concerned  
the sexual content of this episode is horrendous :P  
all these exploding heads and repressed men  
and hefty penises

mittensmorgul  
It's incredible

-

"I always thought they were kind of cool though" Dean says and then pulls an incredible face, like, closing his eyes in self-reprimand. Is this because he's scared and doesn't want to hold Felix and this puts him in danger of being asked to hold the snek, or is this a metaphor about Dean and, well. Snakes.

-

"You try one of those. They're great."

Jack immediately has a complete existential crisis, going for the chocolate one before sort of recognising what it Means, and then throwing it down and taking the angel food cake because, well, it says angel on it. And Dean is looking at him sideways like he deliberately picked those cakes, like giving Jack the option is literally one of his TESTS of someone's goodness.

Like, Dean literally has gone out there and devised a system of how evil someone is based on cake.

This car scene is so deep meta I regret joking the Meghan was the no homo intern at the top of these notes, because these creme filled angel cakes and the snetaphor and... yeah.

-

Dean huffs an actual sigh of relief that Jack picked the angel cake, and, probably more importantly, had the internal debate about the meaning, and wanted to choose the angel cake after recognising the inherent danger of eating Devil's Food Cake.

-

Dean employs cake subtext like a boss.

-

I mean... he's the most innovative hunter so I suppose he employs that mind to use for parenting but it's just... hilarious and weird

-

I'm loving how we're riding with Cas for this whole episode - even before Sam got turned but now we get Cas coming out of his room in the morning after deciding it's time to get moving, but Sam, ever the early-riser, is gone... D:

-

She has earphones in!! the boarding house owner seems to have a link to the modern world... Hrm.

-

Hahahah Cas having to shout

He doesn't like doing that in case glass starts shattering

-

Poor Cas having to deal with everything she just said, from admiring Sam to suggesting he's off to get a milkshake, and Cas stands there for a moment, thinking almost audibly, before deciding he can't unpack all this and just heads off to see what's up

-

Omg his car got bird pooped

-

This town is perfect for everyone but Cas. He doesn't eat and so he's not fitting in... And is surrounded by normal annoyances and such. I feel like he's about to step in a puddle or something. It's like... a sub metaphor beyond the blatant text of the episode about the town being creepy but reapplied to Cas, it's humanity still operating in a microcosm, from sexuality to food, and he's left out and somewhat an observer. After last episode and his chats with Jack where he seemed to have rationalised being immortal and watching everyone die and having to be okay with that, now he's sort of... being extremely useful that this isn't affecting him so he can handle the case, sure, and yay for Cas getting to be the most useful hunter in this episode (as Jack and Dean seem to be doing something less investigative) but it is also very much setting him apart and isolating him in a rather uncomfortable and sad way, even from the vibrancy of current life - like, we don't WANT him to get milkshaked, sure, but on a wider level, if being milkshaked is being human, he's not getting sucked into this community.

It also does stand as a third and most excellent metaphor beyond Cas's angel stuff, to a wider more applicable queer metaphor about Cas being immune to this heterosexual white picket fence stuff, and this goes marvellously with John thinking Dean wanted the white picket fence and being sad he didn't have it and Dean being like, I HAVE a family, and announcing his OWN queer metaphor about found family and untraditional arrangements such as what he has.

-

I mean Dean is literally now living in a family unit where Cas is his de facto husband but they just haven't recognised it yet despite playing out that dynamic and it's so wildly frustrating I could bite my keyboard in half.

-

"Oh, the tall man."  
"yes, the very tall man."

internally: "oh god, this is how Dean feels all the time, how does he COPE with it? He's so strong."

also: "I've read porn that you've written"

-

He stops her by putting his hand over hers which is a very intimate gesture and it does shake her out of her work and this weird sort of state of chirpy mindlessness to give him useful information... It almost feels like they don't MEAN to lie but they're taking around the point... If she's not responsible but someone else is, and I feel like she would not have wanted her lover's head to explode, they're being controlled to lie and elude investigation. Just like the couple - the "smiths" - where the wife was so numb to her "husband" exploding.

-

Cas, you are not prepared for the monster you will see when that door opens.

A billion years old and you haven't girded yourself.

-

Oh, no mr rogers!Sam yet, just Mrs Smith being absolutely terrifying.

-

"he has... beautiful hair" Aw Cas, you charmer bahahahahaaaaa

oh my god

-

Mrs Smith is being framed constantly with her head (uhoh) against the oranges. Oranges are DEATH.

She may explode.

-

She metaphorically explodes when Cas almost sits in her husband's chair.

-

"Have you already had your martini today?" there's definitely a completely prescribed set of robotic behaviours for the townspeople to observe. They're probably in all their houses simultaneously doing them. No one was in the diner because they're not "supposed" to be out there having their milkshake yet.

-

Justin Smith is the worst except for Kale Sam and having to see him and Lawboy back to back practically is just cruel.

Sam is going through some shit this season.

-

Cas winks at Justin Smith in case this is just a ruse but Justin has no idea who he is.

-

If you had just knocked him out and taken him to a spa none of this would have happened.

-

*SQUINT*

-

"Oh you"  
"Oh you!"  
"Oh NO."

-

"Rawr."

I am going to kill Sam myself.

-

I can't believe Sam - sorry, Justin - is telling Cas off for swearing. On their Inside Man adventure, Sam witnessed Cas saying the eff word but censored for the CW but strongly implied to have been not "freaking" if you were actually there in person behind the censor :P

-

Jack still needs to swear. It's time. I feel it brewing.

-

Blow up that door, Cas. Blow it to aitch ee double hockey sticks

-

"Our... field trip is to see Donatello?"

This is very much the "I wanted to go to Disneyland but you took me to the vet" reaction.

Sorry, I was going to say dentist but Jack is a puppy so

-

Have we EVER seen Donatello outside a Buckleming episode except attempts to murder him?

Is Meghan going to murder him?

-

Poor Dean.

Only a snake for company and not very good company at that.

-

Very cool, Dean.

-

This is absolutely not indicative of how Dean felt about Jack when he was a newborn babyman

-

Omg I suddenly... like... donatello. Huh. That coffee metaphor was good and also helped Jack in a way where in the earlier episode (14x06?) he was pouring so much sugar in his coffee trying to get it how he liked it but now Donatello offers him the option of putting milk in it instead and it changes the coffee in a very different way. Instead of the sugar masking the bitterness, milk sort of binds with the bitterness in tea and coffee and covers it completely. The swirly dark centre of the coffee gets covered over and filled in by the milk and it's mixed in, but suddenly you look at it through this lens and you feel the darkness is still there under the milk, it's just all mixed in so the surface is pale now. Brown, though. It's a coffee version of shades of grey. There's no choice like Dean trying the angel/devil cakes on Jack, there's just coffee and whatever it mixes into, when it comes to Jack and his bizarre unique nature.

I think Jack is possibly a more evolved, unique being than anything we've had on the show before, as previous mythology has things going all over a scale of demon to human to monster, all souls being changed and corrupted but Jack... different kind of thing altogether.

-

We're getting worryingly deep - "Maybe I don't know what nothing feels like"

back in 13x04 Jack tried to explain himself to Mia and said he didn't feel anything but he was all shaken up and new and traumatised, and clearly felt a Lot. Again going back to the start for Jack, he's getting this counselling from Donatello, who also showed up when he was new to comment on his nature, and it's sort of checking in on how nuanced his understanding of himself is.

He is clear he doesn't feel nothing at first but then gets self doubty...

And he doesn't want Sam and Dean and Cas to worry - aha, empathy.

-

"Who's Mr Rogers?"

Currently your dad, in a horrifying corrupted form.

-

"What would the Winchesters do?"

I mean, Jack has that pretty well down considering he sacrificed a good chunk of his soul to save them which is why we're even here having this conversation :P

But yeah, it's a good philosophy. Weird that he doesn't include Cas in it, but maybe that's just because that would involve declaring Cas a surnamed Winchester which would also then imply openly that he's married to Dean

Because I mean really.

Anyway, Jack has a lot of sit down chats with people about who he is, from the Klines to Donatello, and he's changed a lot along the way even in one season but this one feels good and settling, as Donatello mostly explained to him what Jack was already doing and had already been feeling, and to that point, if Jack is a swirling coffee with a layer of feelings around the edge but a dark coffee centre, and he's already been inspired by Sam and Dean so much to emulate them as much as we've seen, Donatello did that thing where the best advice someone can give is basically to pep talk you into believing in yourself and the values you already have but just didn't have a grasp on so that all you're doing is taking the reins of your own self...

... honestly Mr Rogers probably would be proud

-

I'm sorry was there the faintest trail of bird poop on Baby's nose? Jensen, you're fired, we can find a new Dean.

-

funny that that happens to both him and cas in the same episode

-

or maybe it was birb poop season here when they were filming

-

Dean tries to get the dirt from Donnie but Donnie is being cryptic by habit... Again, an ounce of extra nuance in the text and I'm really enjoying him. Thanks, Meghan!

We get Jack being adorable in the car and looking after his snake, while Donatello warns that he's the most powerful being in the universe, and Dean glances over and gets a cute wave... And just like that my nervous feeling that Jack has literally consumed Michael's big bad status comes creeping back like cold fingers...

-

ALSO we are less than 10 minutes from the end and Sam is still brainwashed and a total nightmare.

-

Uhoh, Cas has come in to where Sunny is carrying two milkshake jugs to her chest (subtle) and surprises her and accuses her of being a witch... I am pretty sure she just likes dick and it's the mayor but okay

-

CAS NO don't rip it from her mind! you literally swore you'd stop doing that to people and just because you did it to donatello once doesn't mean you do it to everyone!

even if you think she's a witch

that's a very concerning and abrupt use of powers and Sam is in peril and you've apparently spent most of the daylight hours pacing around with a black cloud over your head working out what to do about this but... woah there cowboy.

-

oh look it's the mayor

-

SAM SNITCHED ON CAS TO THE MAYOR.

-

Man, doesn't it suck to be the only gay in the village, Cas?

-

mittensmorgul  
so are you back to Sam and his tiny teacup?

elizabethrobertajones  
yeah  
well, Justin the SNITCH  
sorry, he's brainwashed it's not his fault  
but he's giving Cas such a stink eye

mittensmorgul  
JUSTIN

elizabethrobertajones  
I feel like if I was Cas I would be taking this a little bit personally later  
like, on the ride home, I would call him Justin  
if he did anything remotely irritating  
"can we change the radio station Cas?"  
"I don't know, CAN WE, JUSTIN?"  
"I was BRAINWASHED"  
"You were an ASSHOLE"

mittensmorgul  
OKAY I'LL GIVE YOU THAT, BUT I WAS STILL ~BRAINWASHED~ YOU SHOULD KNOW WHAT THAT'S LIKE, CAS

-

"Do you know what happened next?"  
"No but I have a feeling you're going to tell me"

I love sasstiel with all my heart

-

"I can make people do WHATEVER I WANT" oh good to know the old white man wants to regress society back to some horrifying fake cutesy 50s vision

-

"I was just protecting my home!"

this is a gun ownership metaphor, huh?

-

CAS FIGHT and he has to do cool shit like beat up two guys with a milkshake jug

-

"has to"

I mean seriously he is not good at fighting, I think the garrison only kept him around because they liked the sarcasm

-

Oh of course the old white man tells Sunny that it's her fault he killed Conrad, because she told him the truth so he had to do it. Like, total display of how it's always the woman's fault and the man is never ever to blame, no matter how much of a logical twist it has to be to make him the victim and her the liar and one at fault

And of course he throws out the "did what I had to do" line in a way that once again shows how toxic it can be when it comes to preserving something at all costs.

I'm assuming Sunny is about to be revealed to be his lovechild or something

-

Cas, WHY do you keep that stupid blade up your stupid sleeve...

-

Cas getting a lil 10x22 flip with Sam being the one trying to kill him and weirdly when it's Sam he's full of very good points about what's up between them and uses their love of Jack to stop Sam and he does the whole stab the thing next to Cas that Cas is honestly probably weary of at this point...

Also Sam's wearing unsuitable glasses and a ponytail the entire time so there's that to completely defuse the situation into the realm of absurdity :P

-

there we go Sunny is the mayor's daughter so the icing on the cake is that his accusations that she is as bad as him for standing by is that she was actually trying to look after him because her mom said to and she was being loyal to him despite knowing how terrible he was and he's making that her fault

-

"GOD HAS A BEARD"

listen

if you're going to have a stupid battle cry

that might as well be it

-

Ew, lumpy sam

-

EEEK so we had a sort reminiscent of 2x05 - Simon Said - but a father and daughter instead of twins, and their power is soooo much worse. And then she immediately uses it on him and takes it to 8x08, but involuntarily trapping the powerful psychic inside his own head, as a punishment.

Given how we just had Dean there in Rocky's in his own head and also John back to remind us the show is based on a terrible father (and God has a beard - Cas really isn't ever going to talk about Chuck except as an abstract absurd detail of the world), there's an awful lot to unpack here, from Michael to John to God, as well as the nature of power - a Lucifer and Jack parallel when it comes to the parent and child aspect - so... maybe I will leave that to someone else because I am very sleepy but so near the end of the episode.

He's very definitely living in the past and now they can set him aside to do that for the rest of his life, so that his daughter can be free to live her own life... And express her sexuality and escape from this repressed world of ~morals~ where wanting a normal healthy relationship wasn't seen as sinful and worthy of exploding a guy's head.

A freedom that Dean also gets from putting John in the past and keeping him there and moving forwards himself >.>

-

Oh the bunker exterior set looks like it's taken some punishment D: I know they CG'd the big stuff around it but it looks like some other stuff has vanished... it's literally just the door surrounded by a dirt hillside that looks sort of collapsed

In-world we have to assume battle damage >.>

-

"Seemed like the snake enjoyed the trip."  
"Hard to say, he's very guarded."

We get it, he's a metaphor.

Dean leaps back a foot. His squeak reminds me he's also scared of spiders, per 13x08 and the hole he didn't want to stick his hand into.

-

Is there a single animal on the whole show that Dean has liked or trusted? He made Sam go down the hole in Bugs and I think it all spiralled from there.

-

"heard you wore a cardigan"  
*Sam rotates on the spot to glare at Cas, radiating indignant betrayal*

Cas knows exactly how to make Dean happy and that is immediately ratting out every stupid detail of Sam's cardigan and wife.

We call that good husband material.

-

"There's a lot of happy going on around here," Dean says, thinking of how to reward Cas and not even knowing what Cas has learned from Sunny's letters and is planning to show Dean, but thinking about how maybe, just maybe, they can have a quiet evening in -   
"I hate this place right now."

oh. right. sammy's still traumatised. put the cowboy boots away Cas, this might be a long night.

-

"This is my home" WAAAAH HE FINALLY FEELS LIKE THIS IS HOME IT'S ONLY BEEN 6 YEARS AND ROBBIE'S LIFE WORK

Thanks, Meghan.

-

She also wrote in the script

[both winchester brothers stand there with tear-sparkling eyes]

and for that I thank her but in a less exuberant way and more in a throwing a cushion at her way.

-

Er, Jack

Jack no

JAAACK NO

-

that is not a solution to anyone's problems

-

RIP Felix, we hardly knew ye and Jack never even learned your name before he turned you to ash.

-

Cosmic teens are the worst.

-

Cas, standing at the doorway: "WOW I wish I had accidentally seen him jerking off like a normal teen"


	16. 14x16

14x16 watching notes

I am concerned about our son. Also I guess there's a non-jack plot this episode?

-

ALSO I AM CONCERNED ABOUT THE BUNKER STREET IRREGULARS. They're gonna adopt Jack and teach him to throw rocks at cars and then he will accidentally eat one of them out of misguided compassion.

-

Oh no the lingering reminder of the cute girlfriends (oh lordy... max and... something... I am so bad at names...) makes me worried they're particularly maybe going to be singled out to be murdered for man pain. D: Guys it's been 4 years, and we're still mad. Don't.

Although the dork in the bobble hat seems like a natural rival to eat for dominance because he's essentially Jack As A Natural Human in personality type as far as I could get a read on him last time :P Just a dumb wide-eyed enthusiastic kid who accused Jack of being Bambi without understanding it seemed to apply to him too.

There was definitely more to his backstory we didn't get because he wasn't "supposed" to be at the party and with the John interruption we never got the rest - I suspect their return is the overflow on that, and also I've always assumed the myriad guest stars who say they might be back this season are people who sign multi-episode contracts just *in case* they're needed again as a certain level of character relevance heirarchy or some arcane thing - and we DO get people returning a couple of episodes later sometimes - but seeing their story cropped off for JDM and then them returning 3 episodes later seems very specifically an example of why you might habitually sign people up for a multi-ep contract leading to random peeps who had a speaking role tweeting to fandom they might be back and then of course after all that wild spec we never see them again.

Anyway hooray for that actually happening here :D

-

Unless they all get eaten.

-

tragic recap of the bunker peeps for Sam's angst.

RIP Maggie

Who died yelling "Saaaaaaaaaaaam!!"

-

Yeeeah we're in the last 4 episodes of the season twist that Jack's been the big bad all season, not Michael.

-

Oh look, people are still making out in their cars despite living in a world of literal horrors where monsters pick off anyone who does this and says "it was just the wind"

You'd think a world with actual monsters would have naturally selected teen make out spots out of human behavioural patterns by now.

-

Anyway that's subverted with a dive into natural human family drama despite the mysterious music that distracted them. Maybe in fact saved them from being more undressed and dishevelled when the sheriff showed up.

The son gets pretty confronatation especially with the "watch it" "or what" and the emphasis on his independence, along with a sense of neglect and abandonment from the parent who is supposed to be looking after him but is out of town (and Jack is being left behind this episode) and the father who is at work and it isn't his week to be responsible for him anyways... urgh. Upsetting as a Jack parallel in the sense of substituting any natural reason to feel like the parents don't love the kid to a potentially soulless lack of attachment, which is worse that emotions DON'T run high. At least this way you might think they do all secretly love each other but it's all a bit messy on top.

-

This bathroom is absolutely rank. Maybe this is a side effect of the shutdown where no one was there to clean it for over a month.

Even in a horror setting, opening a stall door and going "oh god" is understandable not as monsters but as, as Cas said once, "everybody poops"

This is pretty much an advertisement to never, ever pee in gross public toilets in the woods at night.

I don't think I'd have made it past the first stall before deciding I could hold it until I got home, and just wait an appropriate amount of time for the family drama at the car to work its way through.

I mean what an inglorious death if she's in a gross gross stall and peeing and then the lights start flickering off and that's the last thing that ever happens to her?

-

Kill me before I go in the building, honestly.

-

Oh GOD this gets worse with something moving around outside D:

-

Wait oh god it was in the other stall. Has it manifested from whatever was - no

don't even think about that

-

Okay no the hand does kinda look like a poop monster

-

That thing was literally standing in the Bigfoot Pose

-

last night I was listening to the new Adventure Zone which included a lil tussle with Bigfoot and honestly now Meghan is, I think, caught up on TAZ, I've got to say I was expecting McElroys to sneak into the show more since she was like yeah whatevz I'll put a Griffin and Justin in my first episode, but this is maybe going a bit hard :P

-

Well at least Barbara died with her pants on

(Barb? Going for a Stranger Things vibe if we're not supposed to go into the woods?)

-

And we go to Sam lurking in the Bunker

Probably absolutely killing Triss with this shot that reveals the door at the end of the hall from the kitchen from a new angle we've never used before.

-

For my personal nerdery, they've MONSTROUSLY changed the table this season to one with stools which are actually on the ground instead of connected to the table, and the table is shorter and there's only 6 of them instead of the 8 of the original table, but Sam is at least sitting in his appropriate place for being absolutely miserable and alone in a Bunker that briefly hummed with life he was boss of. He's got his back to the light, hunched over his computer with news articles on the screen, and is chugging coffee to go with all that blue light messing up his circadian rhythms.

He's probably not okay just like, based on that one shot if you gave it to me completely out of context.

-

Dean wanders in, seeking coffee as well, apparently horny (missing Cas already? :P). Idk what he's up to but of course he also is heavily burdened, but currently still playing it as not openly sulking, mostly because he's got so good at the self-blame repression game that honestly the Michael Killing Everyone Then Getting Eaten At The Expense Of Their Son's Soul incident is like, a 5 out of 10 on his scale, and 2 points down just for Sam openly grieving about it as well and having not put Dean in the box like he asked so it's all just a whirl of blame and guilt.

Hence: Dean being weird and flippant with Sam teasing him about looking at porn, and playing up his own personality as not knowing what else the internet is for and only caring about boobs, because honestly over the years we really have seen Dean lash out at Sam passive aggressively by just hyper-emphasising being ~himself~ at Sam, whether it's the gross out or playing cute with "I'm just a dumb horny asshole, what do I know, Mr Smarty Pants?" to Sam when he tries to be reasonable or focus on a case or something, which of course is a subversive undermining of Sam's attempt to assert himself by stonewalling him and forcing him to treat Dean as dumber than they both know he is.

There's an element of it in almost every other episode where they're pissed at each other and especially if Sam's been on a moral high ground Dean doesn't agree with, BUT in this case I would not think it's particularly punishing as they're all guilty and messed up and ALSO worried about Jack, and Dean isn't going nearly as hard as he can with this treatment, and as much as he might blame Sam for not Ma'lak Boxing him, there's a whole lot more going on including Dean being genuinely sympathetic and understanding of Sam not liking being home at the end of last episode... This is just a complicated mess and last time out they split up and had almost nothing to do with each other, which of course really helped with them being better at communication at the end of the episode, whereas I'd guess this is where we get some of the issues between them now?

-

"I know you wanted to take some time," Dean says to someone who has clearly been awake all night looking up this case and finding FIFTY people. I mean honestly the first 5 he showed us would have been enough to be suspicious :P

Again, Dean is being passive aggressive about asking Sam if he's up for it because Sam was over-stressing himself working cases, recognised that, decided to be a bit more chill, and has immediately settled down to look up a case with 50 missing people overnight and is ready to go, so what Dean is actually asking is, hey, remember how I took a week to watch horror movies and eat pizza? Isn't there some nerdy movie marathon and idk granola pizza you want to eat for a week?

-

"I'll get Cas"  
"He actually left"

And yeah we knew he wasn't in the episode but that's why Dean is horny? :P Frustrated that Cas is always wandering off and never settling down.

-

It's super early but Dean is already dressed vs sleepy robe and underpants Dean we've seen a few times at this hour. Claiming that Cas left even earlier in the morning, claiming to be cooped up in the bunker. This sense that they've been up and about and doing things but just not in Sam's sphere, where he has been all night, but Dean hasn't even come in for coffee or anything until this point while having a whole off-screen conversation with Cas.

I feel like Cas told Dean about the snek but Dean is being careful about this and not telling Sam about it?

Just, Dean's over-concern about Jack's powers and seemingly NOW not trusting Donatello's all-clear that he himself took Jack on last time? Are dads 2 and 3 talking behind Sam's back because they know he'd take it even more badly?

Cas slipping out for fresh air seems like code for going to get help or intel to be double triple sure because Dean telling Sam this really seems like he's lying about Cas's motives because, well... unless Cas lied to Dean who passes it on to Sam, but then Dean's so concerned about bringing Jack along...

-

They talk about Jack being "good" as in okay to hunt but then Dean also says he wants to be sure that Jack is "right" as in "alright" - their ways of talking are language they always fall back on through the show in ways that have a double meaning of not just physical or even metaphysical wellness but also their inherent moral quality. Something they find themselves challenged on a lot.

If Jack's missing a good chunk of soul, his "rightness" or "goodness" is not particularly something that can be helped in the same way as an arc into corruption and evil, at least in ways we should read it that Jack is intentionally being made dark or bad or wrong. Rather, it's amorality or inability to parse good or evil that will trip him up.

-

Jack reading about zombies again is also unsettling minutes after Dean reminded Sam of the security guard on their family case? In that case Jack was convinced it was a zombie, but has never actually met a zombie, and got all excited about it being a zombie anyway, to the point of having the ghoul explained to him in the terms of how it related to a zombie. Jack of course is now back from the dead and is telling his dads who masterminded it especially, and okay'd Lily's spell, that it's illegal to turn people into zombies. And after coming back from the dead, Dean related strongly to the zombie in 2x04, yelling about what's dead should stay dead. That book from that episode was next to the ones he took when researching the Ma'lak box. And of course Jack's monstrous nature relates directly to both his resurrection and his revenge. A baaad combo.

-

Dean also has a more complicated, competent lie for Jack when Sam starts with a shifty "truth is -" probably meaning to express at least some part of the concerns Dean raised. But Dean startles him and now we have the full context to that we can see Sam being ousted by a more ready and maybe practiced lie that Dean is in on to keep Jack safely grounded and away from the case and therefore away from danger that might inspire him to use his powers and do terrifying cosmic things, melt or eat people.

Sam being startled of course means that he didn't think it was too wild to share their concerns and treat Jack like an adult - which might be an important factor in turning Jack against him if they deny him his autonomy when he literally got this way while declaring he wasn't a child - but Dean, who may know about the snake, is ready to contruct a stronger facade that keeps Jack further from the truth that they're concerned and possibly Cas is investigating him, in order to give them greater security to go behind his back and be concerned about him without him knowing and if he's turned evil, actively working to stop them, and if he's just out of control, reacting dangerously.

-

I hope if Dean does know about the snake, he tells Sam when they're further from the Bunker and Jack accidentally hearing anything.

-

Dean requesting double beer reminds me that he was playing up his gross-sona in another Davy episode back in 12x15 which got Davy a lot of flack from insane Dean fans who were insisting he should be fired for playing with Dean's gross side.

-

Like they never thought Dean had worn his underwear 4 days in a row in hard times before.

-

Like, they do realise how much the Bunker stinks of armpits and BO and feet??

-

How much BABY smells like farts on a bad day?????

-

I've clearly watched too much Queer Eye in the last week because I'm just mildly annoyed that Dean has his plaid hanging out under his jacket instead of wearing a French Tuck.

-

Anyway Jack accepts his mission of getting essentially the same shopping list Cas had in 8x22.

I mean.

Can you fuck up a simple TP and eggs run as badly as Cas did?

-

This is not a challenge, son of walking disaster

-

He has a little think about accepting it, though, and then accepts it with I'd say an assumption of the Jack persona, at least when it comes to being enthusiastic about doing stuff for them just because Dean asks (see: being made to dig up graves while Dean was treating him like the intern) and if there was annoyance that he wasn't being asked on the case - while being back at work studying to be a hunter and bearing in mind that when Dad no.1 was soulless he threw himself into hunting as an inherent mode of being very much like how Jack has defined himself by his career moments before burning off 90% of his soul... this could be bit of a... well resentment would imply emotion, but honestly, imagine loosening ties to his family and someone whispering words in his ear that they'd let him be a better hunter over here without them, re: early Jack being manipulated by Asmodeus fears, just as an example of the sort of damage that can be done by being too over-sheltering of your soulless adopted spawn of satan.

-

Nyoom off to the case

This is a great dynamic because we rarely have the Winchesters in a situation which might seem like it should be more common, of the authority figure who saw the Bigfoot but doesn't want to TELL them (posing as Feds and therefore unless you're a deep X Files conspiracy theoriest like the 8x12 sheriff who KNEW it was zombies - hi random connection to Jack - but that was played for comedy and he was wrong) and so we have both sides of the debate knowing something hinkey is up but they won't admit it so they're going to have to dance around that now.

He's like "fuck do the FBI *really* have a wing that investigates Bigfoot after all? That was one of those things I'd have said was 100% fake until I saw a bigfoot with my own two eyes"

-

Dean leaps a mile when the corpse's arm flops at him - probably just unfortunately at waist height but still uncomfortable - and Sam chides him about how long he's been doing this and he's still scared of the corpses if they move (or grope him) when he's not expecting it.

4x06 is lurking under the narrative at the moment, and so we've had a recent reminder of Dean's fear, along with his paranoia and similar jumpiness around the snake. Some of his job related trauma clearly does manifest in those "cat like reflexes" being PTSD related hyper paranoia of some things, and 4x06 exposed what I seriously believe is Dean's permanent show-wide anxiety disorder, which can come to the surface in unexpected ways, from arcs where he retreats emotionally or physically, to times he becomes extremely overbearing, difficult and controlling.

If this moment is in here, it's not just serving a comedy beat, but also reminding us that Dean is currently a fuckin mess, but trying not to show it, and this time apparently between this and the snake we're getting a fear-related response from Dean, perhaps because of the stressful re-awakening with Michael not in his head, and his blind fugue state smashing of the infirmary while looking for Michael and smashing around just woken up and finding this pressure in his head is gone - and escaped into the world. Jack stopped that problem before it got beyond harming everyone in their immediate circle including bring him and Sam to near-death as they were the 2 who would have died of the no-breathing thing, while Cas could be affected by the blindness and pain. And then of course Jack destroyed himself to stop what Dean had been trying to hold back... Anyway the guilt of not stopping a suddenly externalised fear might be a good way to look at a source of Dean's fear - in the emotional mess he's in, there's no big bad to blame and swing at or to fear any more. The only current threat is in their home, from Jack, so far as they know (or don't). He's not holding back Michael anymore so that mental trauma is suddenly left loose and the sense that he SHOULD be holding back an unstoppable evil that will end the world if he lets his guard down, and to have that removed abruptly with no emotional build up and total horror and self-blame at the loss...

I mean honestly it's amazing he functioned through holding Michael back and it's amazing he's functioning now, and I join Cas from 14x14 in making heart eyes at Dean in total awe of how strong he's been through all this, but that does mean right now that he's a mess and jumping at corpses. Davy also of course wrote the episode where Dean firmly gave himself some time off to recover so clearly understands that emotional self-care is essential for Dean post-Michael, and he got to have it last time, so this is what happens when he doesn't?

-

Lol also there's a sign behind Dean as this happens that says ATTENTION

-

CONSTANT VIGILANCE

-

Jack encouters a terrible obstacle: an "out to lunch! :)" sign

he checks his phone and paces a little robotically outside the store instead of seeking a coffee and pastry like any reasonable human would

Fortunately a carload of humans rolls up

-

AHAHAH Eliot has discovered the Ghostfacers in their exploration of the known supernatural. He thinks they're cool. Max's girlfriend (Stacy? Maybe?) is like "no, they're not" meaning she is the best and we love her and is clearly meant to be the best Winchester stand-in present in this scene based on her opinion on the ghostfacers.

-

I wonder how the ghostfacers videos are faring in the moderner era of youtube than when they started. Like, people going back and discovering them and them getting more notorious just because of the sheer age and accrued hits over time?

Wasn't youtube started in 2005 along with most parts of modern society such as Supernatural?

-

Anyway probablyStacy is wearing a jacket almost exactly like Jack's Christmas jacket so I do think there may also be a really important distinction that these guys represent TFW in some ways but they also represent facets of Jack and maybe TFW's influence on him, but also how he himself has been in the past. Like, maybe without Jack's soul, these dear sweet teens who are now a part of this world with new fresh eyes also represent how we were once attached to Jack just as a wee baby and now can act as sympathetic mirrors when he's soulless and weird :(

-

His soul is out to lunch :)

-

"Is that whatsisname... bambi..?" Stacy is doing to Jack what I am doing to her

I feel called out :P

-

"Are you lost?"  
"Um" *looks around* "no! :)"

-

"Winchesters still suck ass though." "Affirmative"

Caught red handed watching enemy propaganda.

4x17 also still lurking around like it has been doing lately.

But that confirms that Eliot is watching the "how to be a ghost hunter" video so he's not just passively consuming but is definitely interested in getting in deeper.

-

Surprisingly, it turns out under the bobble hat, Eliot has practically Jack's exact hairstyle.

-

"What's a ghost? I should go."

Hon. Everyone knows what a ghost is.

-

Aww Jack feels bad about lying. God he's so weird and spacey when you have real teens watching him in amused fascination. It's amazing how the show tricks us into seeing an adorable 2 year old learning his way in the world until we have to look at him through someone else's eyes and then it's like, how the fuck did bambi grow up to be apparently in his late teens and still be so sweet about lying and talk about it making him feel like when you can't burp in the same babbling way a toddler would describe their feelings.

-

Again, points that he still has a thread of soul, but also he's literally talking about performative behaviour and obviously we know especially with Donatello reminders that it's not so hard when you know what you're supposed to do about being friendly and not lying etc to cling to that, but when it comes to the hard decisions about life or death, it gets so much more difficult and that's when Jack gets terrifying.

-

Poor traumatised son (oops I have forgotten his name already) arrives in the sheriff's office. He's having murdered loved one flashes just like Sam was, and is wearing a jacket that looks like the warm heavy duty non-fashion version of Sam's orange jacket of doom.

Vague family secrets and guilt lurk behind whatever they're talking about but it's all too vague right now.

I think the dad was somewhat worried the son wanted to go talk to the "FBI" about it and it was just that he wanted to talk to Barb's parents?

I think they both know who/what the monster is and we're going to get the expose later but it's all just abstract now for sticking a pin in that they feel guilty.

-

oh my GOD Max and Stacy immediately start talking about how the Bunker probably stinks.

See, Davy know what he's doing.

They're feeling sympathetic on Jack's behalf for him, since he can't feel bad about it himself.

-

Eliot pops up to bother Jack (who was holding up a pie to inspect, and lowered it to find Eliot there - that seems like some internal show language symbolism nonsense perhaps about the connection to Dean going on in the background of this, of Jack getting him pie and Eliot rooting for the Ghostfacers...) some more with absolutely wild over enthusiasm which again makes him come across with that sort of innocent enthusiasm Jack once had when he was happy and new.

-

Dean would come screeching into the building and punch Eliot out to see him talking up the ghostfacers and calling them awesome and corrupting his son with this

-

I say over a week later after going off to yoga, incurring a dreadful migraine, followed by a headcold, followed by a "fuck everything" from Brexit, so I just knitted like 3 different large items and drank tea in the meantime.

I also haven't re-read the notes for the sake of tenuously immediately declaring myself well enough to watch and leaping right back in before the meteor hits my house that will delay my notes AGAIN.

-

Jack still thinks zombies aren't real despite doing reading about them, which is weird because we know zombies are real, unless he's got a very specific movie idea about them, which we've only seen in 5x15, and the myriad other ways to bring back the dead such as what we saw in 2x04 don't "count" to him. After 13x06 he was pretty disappointed after ALL the cases that weren't zombies but he wanted them to be, so I think he's got a pretty weird idea of zombies. It's also funny he says this when of course he's dealing with his own quiet "what's dead should stay dead" arc which is very complex... I think at the end of the day because it robbed him of his ability to feel it's more like this is on TFW to carry the emotional burden of choosing to do it rather than for Jack to angst about - the flip side of the story where the dads are the POV on it and we explore THEIR consequences

-

Awwwww Eliot wants to be his best fweeeend I love him

Pls don't eat him, Jack.

Oh no from this angle we can see the inside of Eliot's coat has plaid in the hood.

-

I love how casual Max and Stacey are about the whole nonsense... I mean Eliot is kinda the right response to find out monsters are real, if you don't feel threatened by them, right?

(I assume no monsters come to Lebabon knowingly)

-

MOVIE NIGHT IS ON TUESDAYS

Of course Dean usually picks.

I can't wait to see the meta on Dean's obsession with Lost Boys you all would have written weeks ago.

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"I mean with kids your own age."  
"Well, I'm two."

*record screech*

Okay, so Jack's 18 with the hospital and 22 with these guys so is he getting older? :P

I do like the way he's talking so completely frankly with them and this is the first thing that's actually tripped him up since they assured him they were in on the secret. He's not really good at lying anyway but his sociability has been affected for sure, and this is a little shift in his behaviour that he's mostly just answering questions and not putting himself forward like asking about them or anything, so the fact they find him a wild curiosity gets completely indulged, so we can have this long conversation where he's getting his slightly robotic replies in.

He's definitely missing the enthusiasm of the Jack who used to wave hello to random strangers they bumped into.

-

Jack gets invited to hang with the cool kids, and after some deep deep introspection, his little wisp of soul is like DUDE, GO.

Still, "I think I'd like that" is definitely not just a turn of phrase in his situation, but another indication that he's struggling to connect with his inner self, even for what should be obvious emotional responses of do you or don't you want to go.

Or, of course, he was asking what would his dads do, and deciding that they would encourage him to go socialise.

-

Jack, hon, you don't have ID because you are a 2 year old spawn of satan, just show them your fake FBI badge and we're good.

-

Oh my god I forgot that Sam and Dean were hunting bigfoot.

-

Aw, this is the scene where Sam floats a theory to prove we're not looking for Bigfoot

I mean, Bigfoot can't travel by toilet which is the only thing we know about this monster really, so I was never really in with a shot of being right.

-

Oh no, more people who might get eaten D:

-

Hi it is literal months later, I'm so sorry, I have been MOBBED by the worst cold ever and I don't have the stamina to handle that sort of thing.

-

Yeah, sure it's just the wind.

"We should head back," he says, deep in the woods, when they've apparently been walking long enough to be worried about it being dark and late and they're... looking for a campsite or something?

Who the hell keeps hiking after dark? I don't know anything about hiking but I'd assume rule one is to stop with a campsite before dark so that you don't walk around the woods in the night.

-

Okay this monster is gross. Why are we having so many gross monsters this season. It isn't even a poop monster and it's still gross.

-

I went literal months thinking they were hunting Bigfoot btw

-

Awww no, the dad knows what it is that's doing it but Tom, the son, does not and so he's getting obsessive and reading about how bears get a taste for human flesh... just trying to find SOME answers and meanwhile his dad seems to be burdened with intergenerational angst. Or else some real angst about having seen Bigfoot but not wanting to be That Guy Who Saw Bigfoot and bringing it all into a media circus and being interviewed on weird mystery programs for the rest of his life.

Kinda feel like the promo pics had a plausible dad/grandad figure out in the woods for him to be angsty about though.

But honestly, the fear of being the guy who saw Bigfoot and not knowing how to handle it IS a valid concern, and I could probably write a whole novel about the internal struggle of being the witness of a Bigfoot attack and struggling with that while the panic about the murder ramps up and you KNOW what you saw but it's like, a Bigfoot...

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Sheriff comes zooming in to tell everyone to wrap it up and end the mass hysteria, at least from Sam and Dean's POV of having not witnessed any of the angst we're privy to. Thankfully, they are not "just" the FBI and therefore will only take this as incentive to continue investigating.

... Sam and Dean have this discussion too and decide that they are law abiding citizens who will do what he said.

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oh my god Max and Stacey(? it's criminal I still am not 100% sure on her name) are adorable

Eliot doesn't think so but then Eliot is too close to this :P

Awww jack shows up with a million Serious Monster Books from the library to replace the modern lol myths as normies understand them book that Eliot had.

-

Jack is getting a little better at waving. Like, less "learned to do this yesterday" and more "this is a thing I do a lil weirdly but basically could pass for a normal gesture if we the viewer hadn't seen him do it as a 3 week old baby"

-

Uhoh, I am a little worried that Jack's appreciation of music is another thing that might be affected by not having a soul... Confronted with modern music he has the obvious barrier of unfamiliarity to an extreme degree which characterises so much of his interactions with the world you could let it slip by, but I think the confrontation also comes like that the music hits him in a way where he has to ask because soulessness is frequently shown as a trope in media by not really appreciating/understanding music. Turning it into a conversation about how all the music Jack knows has been filtered through Dean's tyrannical control of music (just like he controls what they watch on movie night) gives a way in to highlighting that he has a weird remove to the music they're playing and also might not understand what it is when he's mostly learned "music" to be "what Dean likes" and only that genre. But inability to parse a fairly boppy beat as more music and having to ask rather than just assuming it as part of the ambience, which he must have done a zillion times at gas stations etc so this really is playing devil's advocate with him not knowing what modern music is, really points out that he may have more of an issue with the core spiritual experience of Music capital M than just the lol weirdness of Jack's upbringing and cultural experience compared to these normal teens.

-

The tone shift is great - just loving the chemistry in the room with these actors especially as they're sans any pre-Dabb era main character so this is all new territory even for Jack and we've got only a wibbly frame of reference for him because his earnest curiosity thing may or may not be vaguely performative!Jack - but omg these poor kids as Jack starts telling them more about demons like it's the most normal thing ever. He isn't reading the room as they all start to get scared, but it really brings it home how normal these kids are, even Eliot, who has a long obsession with this stuff. Randomly remembering the kids from Swap Meat, and how they were playing with the occult for fun, and definitely seemed more up for hijinks than these guys, who are written way more naturally and not doing Wild Things For Plot like being prepared with a dart gun to take down larger prey for example. God, those kids were messed up, when you think about what they were ready to do even before the Winchesters rolled into town.

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"This is an angel blade!"

Jack... ... ...

This is literally kids getting into the parents' weapon stash while they're away as a scenario. One of them could mention whiskey and Jack would be like, "Dean has loads of that at the Bunker! Brb!" and cut to them all getting trashed.

"Is it made of angels?"

"No! it kills angels!"

Babe, don't trash my assumption I've held for literally a decade or more that angel blades are made of angel. They can do both!

I mean, do angels manifest them or is there one who is always forging new ones and rolling their eyes during seasons 5-8 because angels keep losing them.

-

Omg Eliot nearly died by slinky. I want to ask how - and she answers with "tried to eat it" but that just raises MORE questions.

-

Jack that was a terrible throw. Your popses all are masters at flinging knives across rooms and all 3 of them just felt a great disturbance in the force.

ALSO BECAUSE YOU ARE THROWING AROUND FUCKING ANGEL BLADES AND THE ONLY WAY THIS ENDS IS WITH ALL 4 OF YOU DOING IT

-

I get the feeling like Sam, Dean n Cas have all left town, and we the audience have been left babysitting Jack, but the 4th wall is between us. It's PAINFUL.

-

Meanwhile: Sam and Dean are doing their job. The story is so much not about them at the moment except that they ought to be in the episode just to say they were there, that details that might have taken them the whole episode to work out in the first 3 seasons are just stuff Sam read on the internet and tells Dean for us as they stroll through the case.

Obviously having huge character-based sideplots in a MotW cutting chunks out of the ole investigation and mystery aspect is an important development in the storytelling for getting to the nuggets of goodness that gave the show its real longevity because we all know we're in it for the soap opera, but at the same time it does feel sort of weird that this case has been so rote for them that we're 22 minutes in and they haven't spent a moment baffled, threatened, confused, or even gotten a glimpse of the monster... They've only done the interview and research stage, and it's almost like getting a surreal outside perspective on them doing a case like this is literally just cutting back to show us what they're doing while Jack is playing with knives, because for all the interesting story development of the MotW in terms of the family stake the sheriff blatantly has in it, Sam and Dean have had no emotional engagement in it beyond agreeing the sheriff seemed a bit shifty, and the parallels aren't really hammering home, and we haven't had them bonding with anyone around, etc etc. It's very much just dropping in on the most necessary story beats.

I sort of feel like this might not have been the intent in the writing, in the sense that you probably would aim to write something emotionally engaging for your characters, but from the outside we're literally just seeing that Sam and Dean are invested insofar as it's a case and they want to solve it before people get hurt... I'm going to choose to interpret this writing forgetfulness as almost using Sam and Dean as a framing device because if they're not going to give us a full story then they really are just a cut back to them.

And I know I'm saying this after months of not watching and crawling through this episode, but honestly I did rewatch before getting back into it and Winchesters emotionally glomming onto troubled randos in town is kind of hard to miss so I think I know what I'm talking about :P

-

Anyway they're being whistled at which I assume means they're next to be eaten.

I am wondering if the whistling is actually meant to be a warning and that the monster, which Sam knows about in excrucitating detail, is a generic monster and sort of a red herring to the emotional reasons to be invested in all this. Since there doesn't seem to be any mystery about it. Guy in the woods who turns into it and whistles is a very unexciting case and there's almost nothing really to guess about here aside from that, and of course I'm going off promo photo spoilers.

-

Oops but then the sheriff sneaks up on them because Sam and Dean are only extremely good woodsmen when the plot requires it, like when they're outsmarting an entire team of special forces soldiers in the woods but not when a local town sheriff is wandering after them.

-

They gamble that the shadiness of the sheriff is because he knows what's up, after Sam readily admits they're not FBI, and Dean takes that cue to suggest the monster name to gauge a reaction - hard to do from behind when there's a gun to your neck.

He does then do the Dean Winchester thing of people pointing guns at him ending up being the ones who are in a pickle, so I guess kidnapping the sheriff at gun point and forcing him to deal with whatever dark secret he has out in the woods is one way of doing family therapy.

-

Jack, having never been given any formal training in any of the weapons he's expected to use, and the Worst Nephilim Ever, continues until past dark and the rest of the kids now camping around him watching disinterestedly. I also feel like while this is a somewhat expected response in a comedic situation for any character who feels challenged to do something they think they should be able to do (Terry trying to parkour up that wall that Rosa did in a flash in that one episode of B99), Jack having the singlemindedness to do this for hours without getting bored or ragequitting does suggest, again, that while he's always been an odd cookie from a family of weird ones, this is a very extreme dedication to proving he can throw a knife.

Honestly, the fact that Jack is so hilariously feeble, even with his powers back, is so wonderful. Just all the vibes about needing to protect him and fearing how useless he is - even when he is supposedly a cosmic being again.

-

He COULD just fling the knife with magic, but in the last few months he's had so much of an experience of being human that I think his uselessness still really stings just because he never did get to be a badass and it's good that he's not just relying on powers, but feels like he has to be super trained up.

But at the same time he's expecting results to match Cas, literal warrior of god, and Sam and Dean, raised metaphorically in circumstances directly relating to Cas being formed from the ether sword in hand.

Jack's frustration and sense of uselessness and expecting instant results when he can't do something makes this a mundane version of his experience trying to move the pencil, but 2 years on he's attempting to be an infinitely more complex thing than a cosmic being... He's trying to be a human hunter.

-

So of course he gives up trying and cheats with his magic and shocks some reactions out of the kids, who now probably immediately have a somewhat better sense of his uselessness if they can square it just as him trying to pretend to be a normie when he's actually a jedi.

I love that he's like, "kinda" with a grin when they ask him.

Though this episode is making me feel like the "just give Jack a lightsaber and leave him alone" feeling from 13x23 is now very misguided and he should never, ever be allowed things with sharp edges when at least one of his dads isn't around.

-

Anyway now Jack's getting excited and showing off so I'm starting to feel like a moral lesson is looming and I am very, very nervous.

He still has feelings but if anything it's more like his emotional judgement is wildly impaired and so I'm taking this as a suggestion from the story that you need a soul to not be a dumbass.

-

Awww he's making the knife do the lil infinity sign loops he did with the pencil

I'm starting to feel like the infinity sign is his logo, which makes sense as a cosmic toddler

-

Pls don't get distracted, Jack.

Stabbing new friends is a very bad idea.

-

And they immediately get freaked out by him because like with earlier he gets way too into it and doesn't read the room and is way too self-involved and confident. I mean even if his friends run away it's going to hurt him but aaaargh.

-

Omg nooooooo D:

This does not feel good in a told you so way. Go to your room, Jack D:

-

Maybe after teleporting her to a hospital?

Why do all his friends get stabbed in the stomach.

-

He's NEVER healed before... Even the security guard back in 13x06 didn't seem to be enough to make him do it, never mind times his loved ones have been greviously injured around him. In many cases he looked to Cas to do something - and Lucifer sneaking in a Sam resurrection was a way to buy Jack's favour for a while after he brushed off Cas for not doing it.

-

It is possible that it's not just magic but also knowing what kidney should be connected to what and other things which reading lots of books about angels and hanging out with Cas and his other recent advances in magical theory we've seen him learning about have actually given him a grounding to learn to heal... Who knows. See above: Cas born literally off the production line as far as we know so completely unable to relate to having a useless baby phase.

-

I don't think this was a GOOD reason to learn to heal, or something that will win him back his friends... I feel like they're going to want nothing to do with him even if he made it instantly better just for the wild lack of judgement earlier

Should have carried on playing human and throwing knives and all, but Jack's just completely out of his depth with the emotional complexity this involves, and NOT learning from experience, while old Jack definitely was better at learning everything that he saw. This was a complicated emotional landscape to navigate and he completely failed.

-

"She's okay... Everything's fine, right?"

That's a biiiiiiiit too much emotional trauma for the kids so I think it's perfectly understandable if he ends up banished...

let's just hope he doesn't melt anyone >.>

-

Stacey and Max are the best and I love them. Please let nothing else bad happen to them ever.

-

Eliot, also, is so brave for standing up to Jack even though Jack's standing there looking like a very upset Bambi, because, let's face it, he's objectively terrifying and Eliot just witnessed all that and managed to tell Jack to stay away from them.

-

I wonder what there is to say on a Buckleming plot baby stabbing an adorable (non-white) lesbian and then everyone freaking out and it's just a careless accident of playing with knives they don't understand and then they're like omg we'll bring her back it's fine and then everyone's like IT'S NOT, YOU STILL MURDERED HER

... I mean I could just be looking for Charlie rage everywhere but I feel like if you're going for a direct parallel metaphor that's not going to get more on the nose and throw in how they also have such a high body count for non-white characters too just like, while they're at it.

-

He left all those valuable books with Eliot

-

Hi I'm back after a further week or so of being murdered by a cold. I think a giant un-frozen from the Siberian permafrost cold virus should be a MotW next season. I need to see full Winchester justice enacted on one :P

-

So anyway Dean does the thing where his understanding of the situation makes Sam look dumb in context (not saying he is, just this is a constant framing they use) where he immediately defuses the situation by giving the sheriff a 1 liner on who they are, hands back his gun and lets him know they know what he's also hunting and puts the ball in his court to explain (while also giving them a chance to pick up their guns). After which Sam is like, "oh, so that's why you're keeping people out of the woods" 500 years after Dean got the full read on this.

Anyways at least the pre-Dabb era of the show or maybe just up to pre-Carver (mid-late Carver? I've never studied it hard) always used Dean as a dummy about things to Sam so it's totally fair to point out the opposite framing because emotional intelligence gets so wildly undervalued that I always feel a little glee and this is one of those specific things where Perez co-wrote the episode (though I have been suspecting he was focussed on Jack primarily) that there's this ridiculous narrative that he treats Dean like an idiot so I'm knee-jerk even MORE likely to latch onto Dean being smart and/or framing which makes Sam ask the obvious question for the audience exposition sake just because I seem to hold grudges forever on the writers' behalf when people are unjust about them :P

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Gross monster origin story D: There's some pretty primordial fear of hunger and cannibalism in the US which is probably ratcheted up by colonial fears that the native americans would be cannibals, and then it turns out they all started eating each other instead... I definitely feel like it's left scars on the country's mythos in a way that cannibalism, even with all the famines here in Europe (which would be caused by war, systemic problems, and mass-catastrophe on large populations with pre-existing infrastructure), doesn't quite feel as abjectly horrifying as small groups of people isolating themselves in a wilderness larger than the entire continent they left and then not knowing what to eat there as the winter closed in on the tiny cabin they built that was *ALL* the "civilisation" they knew. The Wendigo in 1x02 was implied to be an ex-mine worker as well, I believe. I would guess transforming and cursing hunger-mad cannibal colonists into a form that can be trapped and controlled even in some part is better than ending up with forests full of wild wendigo if by SPN lore it's anyone who gets into the long pig... (Which also makes me wonder, thinking of that phrasing, if rugarou are idk like latent wendigo in a sort of genetic scarring way...)

Anyways. New monster mythos, and it's been months and months since this episode aired so I'm probably better off just stopping here and getting to a cobwebby dash tab from circa this episode and seeing what better educated people said on the cultural side of it... Like, not like the show hasn't been using Native lore from the start, specifically in the context of wendigos and curses (hi Bugs), so idk what the response was but there WAS a pretty low bar for expectations.

-

Also: currently dealing with a son who gobbled up his uncle and now is having serious self-regulation issues.

-

The sheriff lays into them for not doing a public awareness campaign on monsters, to which Sam looks massively guilty, and at this point in his life I wouldn't even know WHICH crisis this relates to. In his very present trauma he's upset about the AU world peeps who came from a world mobilised against monsters and yet even with a town full of hunters, it didn't do much good for them to fight back... Or so he tells himself.

-

"Put it on Youtube!"

Didn't, this very season, Davy have an episode where a nerd got beat up by a possessed figurine on his livestream, and it didn't break the internet.

Heck, Metatron once resurrected a woman on camera.

-

"Even when they know how to fight, people still die." Oh Sammy. I took too long a break from the angst, this is super raw after weeks and then leaping back in to this D:

-

On the other hand every time Dean turns at that certain angle, now my brain just superimposes a lizard onto his head.

-

OH NO the cycle of revenge on monsters because of a dead girlfriend begins anew! D: The Winchesters party to the angst as helpless and even oblivious onlookers once again. Reminds me of 12x20 with poor Max starting the sibling resurrection cycle again.

-

100% sure if you gave Max and Alicia their own show she'd be back in her body at the dramatic season finale but presumably at the cost of his life and on we go

-

In a very meta way, the kid strides off into the woods with "All new Legacies tonight on the CW" superimposed over him.

-

Wait the Sheriff just went out here with a shotgun when he knew the only way to kill it was a silver blade?

Good scout Sam immediately whips one out so easily I'd bet the camera change just let them hand it to Jared between cuts to hold up to show :P

-

OH NO the boy threw down a juicy steak but HE is the delicious bait D:

-

Oh my god don't go near the mines... the creepy mines are ALWAYS the worst place to be in this scenario

-

Ooh it might be a creepy log cabin in the woods, perhaps where this guy originally ate his family. Listen, it's pretty sunny and this is entirely filmed in the dark so I can just about make out the dad wrestling the beastie and Dean fireman-carrying the poor unconscious lad away.

-

OW.

-

Gross.

But Dean got to tag team the death with the father figure who stabbed the monster and Dean used his light as a weapon and blah blah symbolism.

-

The absolute worst case scenario is they go back to the Bunker and Jack is sitting there all chirpily like nothing bad happened, reading a different book.

-

Awww anyway dad got to keep the son's innocence and bond with him over killing the "coyote" together.

-

He feels bad about doing that and after his rant about putting it all on youtube so people could look after themselves, Sam does a mic drop about telling his son the truth instead of protecting him.

I vaguely remember feeling like Dean and Cas were conspiring to protect Jack from knowing that Cas was making urgent investigations re: snake melting. Not sure this metaphor fits perfectly over the top but whatever, it's been months, I have to stick by these assertions!

-

Oooh moody bro drive. Who snaps first?

"it doesn't make HIS life any better. - do what we do. When in doubt, LIE"

Oh dear.

"Like you did with Jack?"

Okay, maybe Sam WAS in on the conspiring despite the weirdly stacked opening scene, which if Sam WAS in on it the entire time, then that was needlessly (I say) weighted to make Dean n Cas look like the primary agents and Sam in isolation.

-

Sam points out that they also lied upwards to John rather than parents lying down, because family is all about constantly lying about the horrors you experience, just to make each other happy.

-

It's very possible there is no conspiracy, they're all extremely worried dads, and Cas lied to Sam via lying to Dean about what he was up to and HE has wandered off to worry about Jack somewhere while hoping that Sam and Dean are competent enough to stop Jack from accidentally stabbing anyone.

-

And to Jack reading... Though he does look troubled and instense, and rather more like he's searching for answers... Will he lie or tell the truth about what happened?

-

"Hey kid, we're back!" hearing Dean growl that out in the most domestic setting actually murders me.

-

Yah, he's doing his carefully picked words and talking about the surface level "mission" to go shopping, while revealing that he has no ID. He can't lie about his identity. And yet he doesn't HAVE a valid identity. He's in identity limbo. He's not got an age that makes sense, or a public facing persona that makes sense... He's off the grid in all relatable human experience to the point where just to get by as if he were a normal 22 year old he'd need to fake up SOME of his ID even if he used as much truth as possible.

I mean he can't even get a birth certificate that makes sense.

-

Not that this trite puzzle has ANY bearing on his more cosmic and emotional issues.

-

Sam and Dean tag-team the dad thing about revealing they didn't want to bring Jack along because they were concerned about his powers and they're telling the truth here I think, so, yeah, Lying Dad is Cas right now but he's protected them from lying to Jack like they're Actively Horrified about him rather than just Kind of Concerned.

-

Dean babbles through the moral of the episode with the huge discomfort of one who is not prone to emotional honesty but via having a son who is owed it in ways he can't avoid, he now has to actually use emotional honesty himself so hey what do you know, he's always learning and growing and maybe one day will be able to not immediately slam down his own feelings when they come to his own selfish needs and wants rather than just other people :)

-

*Nougat Loading* *wheel spins*

"I understand. I won't use my powers without permission. Promise."

Oh poor robotic child.

Dean sulks out to get beer, leaving Sam to take the full dramatic irony whammy of asking Jack if anything else happened and being the one smiling indulgently and lovingly at his actual son he raised from a wee giantbaby nephilim as he gets lied to the face.

Ooooooooooooooof.

-

I am not at all concerned about how that was the cliffhanger.


End file.
